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Depression
-My mother's a whore who doesn't care to sleep wit several guys within days, married or not
-My father used to serial cheat on her, ever since the first 3 days of their marriage, and now she's gettin revenge
-No one could give a shit about me, so their shipping me off to another country
-Their pretendin to care, and sayin they want me to stay, though i'm not stupid, they both want to make me suffer(if i live wit my mom, i live wit her 2 BF's, and if i live wit my dad, i live wit his GF
-I don't know anyone in the Dominican Republic, what the hell am i supposed to do there, where the hell am i supposed to go to high school, and where the hell am i supposed to live, my own family members can't decide were to put me, since none of them want me there
-There's SOOO much more pain in my life write now, there wouldn't be any space to write it
-I have a serious addiction to cutting myself, and i think i may even be developing an addiction to pills, i mean, why wouldn't i be depressed
-And i know it's not a sex question, but it's a popular topic, and i just want to know, is there anyone who cares, anyone who can help me, anyone who can tell me, why haven't i killed myself, what the hell do i have left to care for, and what in the world am i supposed to do with my piece-of-crap-for-a-life
-I've tried proffesional help and advice, it seriously doesn't work
P.S.:plz, no wiseasses, i really don't want to deal wit that right now, cuz ur not gonna get a pleasant reaction
Sincerely,
Life Falling Apart(13/f)
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Oh my gosh!
Awww~~~
I'm really sorry!
You need to stop cutting yourself, though. There are major veins in your body that can burst while you're cutting yourself and you can die from it! Never say you want to die. Life is too short for anyone to be killing themselves. I'm your age, 13, and I know how it feels to think no one cares about you but there are people who do. You may not think there are, but there are!
You need to talk to an aunt, uncle, older sibling, ANYONE who you can talk to and maybe even stay with to be away from everyone. Your life is not falling apart. It might seems like it but there are ways to fix it. Change everything you're doing. Talk to your mom and dad. Tell them how you feel about them doing this to you. They should ship you off to another country because that's depressing you even more and you SERIOUSLY do not need that in your life!
You have to tell them whatever you feel like telling them. You have WAY too much bottled up anger inside you and that is not a good thing. You have to let it out! Scream, kick, throw things, cry, yell, just LET IT OUT! It'll help you get out your feelings and it'll make you feel better. Don't HURT someone but let it out by yelling and crying and who cares if you act like a 2 year old? You have the RIGHT to after all the shit that's been going on in your life.
People who bottle up anger inside them are usually killers, rapists, and drug users and you don't want to become that. You have to let your anger out, this once. This once, let something trigger you to where you let this anger out. It's not good. Let your feelings out. Sometimes, being calm doesn't help you. Sometimes, screaming and yelling does!
I'm always going to be on your side. I may not know you but this is the most interesting question I've answered all day and for all the months that I have been into Advicenators. It's good that you look to us for help! That's a DEFINITE plus!
You need to stop cutting yourself. Some people do it because they THINK it's the only pain they can control but it's not. You control your own life and you have to change it, become tougher. Don't become addicted to pills. It can damage your health badly and you may ruin your entire life. It may seem like it's already ruined but there is still someone out there who can change it. Trust me... 5 more years to go... then, you can get the hell out of there, go wherever the hell you want, and DO whatever the hell you want to. Enjoy being a kid. I'm sure you have friends who will stay by your side and if not, I'm by your side at all times. Email me ANYTIME you want to just talk or need to ask a question. My email address is x_pink_x109@yahoo.com and I check it everyday.
I want you to know Advicenators cares for you and we want you to be happy, not depressed. Try to stop cutting yourself. I want to change your life by telling you to STOP CUTTING YOURSELF AND STOP DOING PILLS. They will ruin your life and make you want more and more until you die. You do not want to die from over dose on pills and you do NOT want die from slit wrists/neck/legs or whatever you cut. Don't kill yourself because of the pain in your life. Try yo change it instead. I want you alive, not dead. You seem like a really nice girl. I'm your age and yes, I have gone through some hard times (NOTHING like this, might I add) and there, honestly, have been times where I just wanted to die. Either from embarassment or because I was grounded for a year and didn't see the world until my next birthday!
Do NOT worry! You need to shake this off and get on with this life that you are living! You may not WANT to live it but you have to. You were put on this earth to do something and you have to live, at leats until you find out what it is. Maybe you could do something that would change the world of tomorrow. You need to think positive instead of thinking about all the crap in the past. Think of happy times you may have had with a best friend. I know it may be hard. You're a fighter, I can tell by your question. Fighters ALWAYS win. They always figh through whatever hardship they're going through and they FIGHT! You can do this! You may not WANT to but I want you to and I KNOW you can.
This is a SERIOUSLY long answer, the longest answer I've ever given, but I'm serious. You can do this, you NEED to do this. It's not for your mom or dad or whoever else, it's for you. It's for your own good. And if I were you and MY parents wanted to ship ME off to another country, I wouldn't care WHAT they said. I would go anyways.
If this gets TOO serious to where you can't SEROUSLY handle it, you should get the cops involved. They can do something like make you stay with one of your closest relatives for however long. That can help too.
I want you to know that I'm always here for you if you need ANYTHING in the world. If I could, I would give a million dollars so you could live your own life but unfortunately I don't have that kind of money. :-)
Please listen to what I have to say and I hope you took the time to read what I had to say! I had to say a lot but still...
you should still know everything I have to say like I'm always here for you when you need it.
I want you to know that, I NEED you to know that. Email me at x_pink_x109@yahoo.com The only reason why I put it again so you would see it twice andbe reminded that we care about you.I mean this whole website cares, no matter who they are, unless they SERIOUSLY have no heart and they have mental issues. I CARE ABOUT YOU and I don't want you going down! I want you to succeed in life and do whatever you're supposed to while you're on this earth. Just be yourself, and know that people care!
Best of luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Kayla
TRIPLE LOVE~!~!~! ♥♥&hearts
I'm REALLY sorry! Email me if you like... you have my email!
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=( This is probably the saddest story I've ever heard... I honestly don't know what to say... I just wanted to say that I'm sympathizing... Well, while I'm here, I might as well think up an answer, here's what I'd do: first, punch a pillow. Insanely hard. Repeatedly. Until the feathers come out. Then buy another pillow to repeat the same process. If the feathers won't come out, pretend it's your mom or your dad. Second of all, you should talk with your parents, try get them in one room together... and talk to them, tell them how you feel. And if you're really stuck, I swear I'm not being a wiseass, go to the local orphanage. Trust me, it'll be better than moving to a different country with nowhere to go. I really, really, REALLY hope life gets better for you. Hope I helped!
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First of all;
Professional help can be worse than no help at all sometimes. I've always found that when you go to some professional who deals with these kinds of things all the time it's just really screwed up and dead. First, they have a nice friendly chat with you, but it's not normal talk. They don't really care who you are, because they're trained not to get attached to the people they talk to. They're trained and that's what makes it so dead. Their chat revolves around you, they don't tell you who they are often. Anyway, after they've "assessed" your situation, and your life at home they go in to problem solving mode, and everything will be alright soon. It's a serious bunch of shit, and you're never alone in not getting a thing from a professional counselling session.
I just thought I'd start off by letting you know that it's alright if you've been to professionals and not come back a happier girl.
Secondly - you wanted to know why you haven't killed yourself. Don't take anything I say as right, because chances are that it won't be anywhere near, but everything is a little bit of use when you feel like nothing matters anymore. I think the reason you haven't killed yourself is that you hope things can get better. You're 13, and you don't want to be gone yet. You know that your life isn't everything that it should be, or anywhere near that, and you want to live to see it get better. You're alive because you're smart enough to know that the future exists, and the chances are that if will get better.
You're addicted to cutting yourself. You have passed the first "stage" (I'll try not to sound like one of those professionals, o.k.? I'm 17, I'm a screw-up, I'm trying to get over it...). When you're trying to give up an addiction, the hardest thing to do is to admit that you're addicted, and commit to stop doing it. I think right now, your cutting is something to make your pain visible. You're doing it because of the stress that surrounds you, eats at you, and makes you so miserable. The first -step- is to get away from it. I think that the best thing you can really DO right now is to do your best to make sure your parents send you off somewhere. Have you got any friends that you can stay with? Be kind of careful when you're looking for a place to stay, because 13 year old girls can tend to be vulnerable in the big bad world. What I'm saying is that there are situations that you could go into that are a whole lot better than where you are right now. Wherever you go, you will find a way to make new friends, better friends that you might even have now, because you'll be that much better at picking them out of the crowd than you were 3 (or however many)years ago when you started at your current school, and made friends with some of the leeches that just won't go away now.
Anyway, to try and keep it a shortish kind of long - GET AWAY FROM IT! It's the best thing you can do. It will let you think, it will hopefully get you away from the cutting. Another thing for the cutting is physical exercise just to take your mind away from it. Any time you feel like cutting, do 20 sit-ups. Either you'll end up too stuffed to cut yourself, or maybe it will have passed by then. The pills are a different story. I'd recommend going to see a doctor or a pharmacist or someone "professional" :( If you've got a drug addiction, get rid of it now, because the only thing it will do is keep your life shit, and help to screw it up over and over again. Perhaps if you went to a shrink again they would prescribe anti-depressants, which might also be useful for stabilising your mood.
"what am I supposed o do with my life" kind of question - Make it better is my most straightforward answer. It's your life, and it's going to take your sweat and blood (Urgh, bad phrasing) to make it better. It doesn't mean it's your fault, that it's gone crap, but eventually things even out. Bad things happen, and you have to do a lot to fix them, good things happen, and they make you happy when you haven't done anything to earn them. You're the best possible person to help yourself out of the hol, because only you know how deep things are, only you know what makes you happy, how you can change everything to make things work out.
Depression is like falling into a pit-toilet out in the bush somewhere, and then just kind of sitting there, getting 'shitty' (oh yes, a pun!) about what's happened to you, and waiting for someone to come rescue you. Some people show they're depressed pretty well, and sometimes they've brought friends along in a campervan who go "where's larry?" and come find you, and get a rope. Other people keep feeling sorry for themselves, and a few die down in the pit, lonely, and depressed. In my book, the real heroes, the people who know where they are, realise they're in the bush and their friends aren't there to dig them out, keep trying to climb the shit brown walls, until two weeks later, they find the maintenance-man's foot holes, climb out into the sun stinking of shit, and go jump in the lake (ok, well I can't think of a very good end to the story, but the meaning is in it already)
It's up to you to decide to climb out of the shit-hole, and you're the one who has to find the foot holes. Simple as that, however complicated it may be. When you're out of there, your life is up to you, but it will start to look a whole lot rosier after you've had a shower, and decided what you want to do. Life is about change - Change is one of the worst things people can go through sometimes, and sometimes it's the thing that saves their lives, makes them truly happy.
I for one really care about you, and anybody like you because I know pain, and it's the same for everyone, and I know that the kind words of a complete and utter stranger are often the best thing in the world. -Even if they do write like a 1000 word essay on it - sorry! :)
And I truly hope that's where I came in, along with everyone else.
-K
I thought after answering this that maybe I could help you further if you wanted someone to just email. The email I post about is me@sadloser.com , and if you email me there I'll reply with a hotmail. I don't like posting my hotmail up because it just screams "spam me"...
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well i think that it is really messed up i think you should take them both and you should talk to them about it i no it might be hard just talk to them about it
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dear falling apart,
killing yourself, cutting yourself or hurting yourself is not the anwser. you will regret it for the rest of your life believe me. its not wroth it. you cant control your parents life. they are adults, they have the right do to anything they want and it may hurt you and it may make you happy. your first reaction to what i am going to say is prebally a no but jusst try it, talk to your parents. maybe they will listen to you. u never know and trying will never hurt. if u cant tell a parent then tell a brother, sister, aunt uncle, friend, teacher, anyone close to you. i know you dont want help from strangers who just tell you, oh it will be ok, i know that never helps and i dont wanna give you that kind of advice. i am going to tell you what i would try to do in this problem, i would try talking to my parents or some1 close to me. i would read them what you just wrote up there. it will help alot im sure of it. just try it, its better then hurting yourself. please dont do anything like that its not worth it. no matter how hard your life will get, hurting yourself for life is never the anwser.
so please think about this.
<< sorry soo long!!
<3,
ask me anything,
brunettecutie**
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I don't really know what to say. But what i'm gonna say is life has it's ups and downs. If your family doesn't care for you ...what i think you should do is fix your life, like try to do good in school just for you..not for anyone else. Talk to your friends, friends are always there for you. If you feel you have no friends, trust me theres a million people on this site that care about you. They might not know you personally, but no one wants to see someone get hurt or hurt themselves. I don't think you need help what I think you need is someone thats always gonna be there. Really your only 13 you have a long life in front of you. You choose your path. This is your life. You might already know this ...so just so you know im trying to give the best advise i can. Cutting yourself is not going to solve anything. I know that cutting makes the pain inside seem like it hurts less and that when you see it bleed it makes you feel better. But really your hurting yourself. No im not gonna tell you to talk to your parents because they seem pretty much in their own worlds. If no ones there for you, again you can choose what path you want to go down. Almost all my friends go through the same thing. I once felt like no one was there. I know what your going through. What i don't understand is why your parents are sending you away to Dominican Republic. If thats where they are sending you. Sorry if this doesn't help.. but i want you to know, I'm always always always here for you. Even if you don't know me personally. I really don't want to see anyone get hurt. Trust me im not being a "wiseass" if you feel i am, which i hope you don't, because im not trying to be. I really do hope your life turns around for the best. Remember I'm always here. Just drop a message in my box and i will always help the best i can. Life can suck sometimes. BUT it will turn around.
-I really do hope this helps....
~please send me a message saying if i helped or not ...if i didn't i can always try to give more advise.
*Remember stay positive even if you feel you life is falling from right under your feet*
ps.. i know it can be hard to be happy when you feel your life sucks.. but i know someone you know cares about you a lot...and they don't want to see you hurt inside. It could be a family member (it may not be your mom or dad but some other family memeber) or a friend.
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What you should do is talk to your mom,dad of how this is all affecting you if they don't care about you than your parents will regret it sooner or later.If I were you I would call the teen help line or go to the church speak to the father and ask for his advice and even confessing what your parents did.Pray as much as you can which is what I do every single day so luck will always be there and so god could protect me.Don't think your life is crap and I do care even though I don't know you I want people to be happy not sad.I would want to be your guardian angel and believe me life is beautiful but you see that it's not because you're suffering but one day you will be happy have faith in god and always believe that you could go on with your life.As far as your parents they outta be ashame of themselves take good care of yourself live!
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