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Nobody helps me except my bf
(Sorry if this turns out really long!) I've only been cutting myself for a little over two weeks but I'm already addicted. I told my boyfriend first because I vent to him a lot. I trust him and he can comfort me. Then later I told my teacher and she suggested for me to talk to my school counselor. My teacher told my parents, too. My mom talked to me but it wasn't about ME, it was about what my sister went through. It wasn't helpful. So I talked to the couselor. She freaked out and kept telling me, "You can't do that! STOP! You have to stop! If you do it again I'll tell the principal!" That is not what I expected from her. It wasn't helpful or encouraging. It was threatening! It almost made me want to cut! Later that day I was sitting alone in the gym slicing the skin on my arms and my Gym/Health teacher saw me and made me go alone in a room with him to talk. He kept telling me that even though life may suck now, it'll get better because I "have a good mind". I didn't think it was helpful either, but I started crying. Everytime I had to talk to someone, I wanted my boyfriend there holding my hand helping me endure it. I feel uncomfotable around everyone but him. One day my teacher actually tried to send me home because I was cutting and crying and miserable. I told her I didn't want to go home, I just wanted to talk to James. (James is my boyfriend.) She said she couldn't let him out of class. I glared at her and wouldn't talk to her. She called my parents and they took me home. The whole time I wanted to scream, "I JUST WANT JAMES!" When I got home I just reread old notes from my bf. He's the only one who can comfort me and it feels like he's the only reason I go on living. Do I depend on him too much? How can I stop cutting if I have nobody to talk to? Please comment or give advice! Sorry so long!
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well.. you should deffenitly stop cutting that dosnt help anything and i know i sound like everybody else but i know what it feels like and how hard it is to stop but you have to. You have to stop doing it for the people who care about you because they probally get freaked out when they see that... So you should try to get a counceler out of school or someone that can help you besides your boyfriend... You just have to try really hard to stop doing it, if you want to talk im me on aim or email me... or inbox me... my aim is durangedbluebery and my email is babieblue11289@yahoo.com......
*kaii*
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Wow. Your boyfriend really loves you. He really cares enough to help you. Talk to him more ,and tell him how you feel. I know you don't want to "depend" on him, but you aren't.. his love is helping you. ♥
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1 it is good that you have that much trust in and that much of a support from him, don;t think you are hanging on to him and that hes your only help though, because thats not true. Cutting is a very hard thing to stop, I have been Doing it for over a year and its still hard for me not to do it, but there are several things you can try, snap an elastic band on your wrist or hold and icecube really tight until it hurts, write your feelings donw, Talk to James more, whatever makes you feel in control of your feelings besides cutting, the longer you cut the longer it will take to break then habit.But Stopping will take time, be patient with yourself, and to be honest the only person that can truly stop you is YOU. Keep me updated >ITSALLKAITLYN< screen name. I hope Your Better Soon <kaitlyn>
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i was addicted to cutting but i went to rehab they locked me up for 2 months. it sounds like maybe you need to check yourself into one too. i kno you prob dont want to but trust me it works. i cut everday untill my mother checked me into rehab and i have been cut free for over 3months all i have left to deal with know is my scars. As you know they are nasty looking.
hope i helped
peaches_n_ream552
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dear cutting,
cutting is a way to relieve stress, right? well anyway, going to james all the time isn't bad. try talking to your mom more and tell her the truth, tel her you didn't think the advice she gave you last time didn't exactly help. ask her maybe if she could hide the razors from you or something. and as i said cutting is a way to releive stress and a way to kill yourself, well instead why not do a sport or something to keep you occupied. try picking up a hobbie, because anything is better than killing yourself. if that doesn't work, i hate to say it but GO TO JAMES!!! if he really loves you, he'll try his best to keep you safe, and if he refuses, thats ok too because he doesn't want to interfere in your life too much and get you into trouble ( i think ) but im sure he will be willing to help. IM me (AIM) and we can talk...shortie10993 is my sn. but i don't think you'll have to come running to me because from the way it sounds, james is going to help you...
((shortie*))
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Well, I've sorta been in your shoes and I had no one to run to! I really didnt cut myself, I just used a needle to carve "F**K LIFE SUX" on my arm, and a couple of scars from the tweasers, I squeezed some skin until it bled... Sometimes when we're upset, we cant get it out, we keep iit to ourselves, thats how I felt! I broke stuff in my room , I couldnt go to the kitchen to get some eggs to break, I went into my room immediately. My parents dont know about it...But I showed it to my friends, I expected them to ask "why did you do this?" but instead they said "UR CRAZY! dont talk to me! UR CRAZY!" or "WOW!thats so cool! how did you do it?".
You wont believe this, but the only person who really comforted me and understood me is called James too! I swear, but hes not my bf, hes just my best friend on the internet.
I think you should be thankful that James is helping you, what a great and perfect boyfriend, but what he should do right now is help you stop doing that. Do you know Shania Twain? she has a song called "Still the one", somewhere she said"still the one I run to..."
Do you get my point? You shouldnt feel like you shouldnt run to him! He should be the 1st one you run to!
To stop cutting yourself, I think you should keep a diary, write everything that bothers you and you'll feel a lot better! trust me, thats what I do, I really have no one to talk to! My James has 2 jobs, and barely has time for me, but my diary is always there, so is your boyfriend! And you know what? Sometimes I think about buying a punching bag, so whenever im angry, I got something to punch!
If you ever need to talk to me, heres my email: prof_Braveheart88@hotmail.com
msn: sweetandsour_Darwish88@hotmail.com
yahoo!: desertgirl88@yahoo.com
Hope I helped...
Sarah
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You need to talk to a diffrent kind of counsler.I can't believe a school counsler would talk to you like that, she needs to think about a career change,
Go to or call you local emergency room at the hospital.Explain it to them and tell them you need to talk to someone. They will take care that you get the help you need.If you are underage you will probably need a parent to be with you.What about Dad? Is he in the picture? Might consider him.
It's great thet you have a good friend like James,but this is really a big deal and he's much to young for you to put the burden of this problem on his shoulders.He might get sick of it pretty soon and move on. You need to get some help before you mess up your life and relationship.
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well first off . why are you cutting ? if its any of my bussiness.. and do you have any other frineds you could maybe talk to ..and i know this is the last thing you wanna hear right now but maybe you should go to a profesional counseler beacuse the school one is just yelling at you and thats not gunna do anything so maybe you need to talk yo someone who can really help you ..and it has to be you that wants to stop.. and another thing cutting is really bad ..it can lead to much worse things im hear if u ever need to talk
*
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i think right now you need to really get close with your parents. they will always be there for you, friendships can get ruined and james could break up with you (but i doubt he will in your time of need) but it could happen. your parents will always be there for you. i know its getting harder everyday to tell them how we feel but when i talk to my parents they know exactly what to say and so just tell your mom exactly what your saying on here. you just need some encouragment and stuff. if you ever need to talk you can im me at texassoccerbabe9 or PiMpInAiNtEsY9 hope i helped! *brookie*
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holy shit. you are gonna be in one helluva mess if james dumps you. try to do other things to deal with your baggage. take up smoking. i am being serious, smoking really takes the edge off.
-hitler
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Hi this is what my mom told me to say "Yes you do depend too much on James. And you should ask your mom if you can go and see a diffrent counsler oth than the school." oh,and my moms ingaged to a boy named James also but he's 21.i know its weird my mom 37 amd James 21 dont ask me they say that they are destened together.
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WOW. you must really, really like James. It seems like he's all you have. and you need to tell him how you feel. cutting yourself is not the answer. you have to try to find some control. if you dont, then it will not be easy for you. and if you cut yourself more, you could really really hurt yourself. i never knew that loving somebody could make you feel like cutting yourself> not to be noisy, but is there something wrong that's making you do this? if there is then try to deal with it or talk to somebody about it that will listen.
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You obviously love your boyfriend. You wouldn't want him to cut himself, right? That's probably how he feels about you cutting yourself. Also, What if every time something didn't go right, you cut his arm. You wouldn't do that, would you? Of course not; you love him! So why do you do it to your own arm? What if someone else wanted to do it to you? You wouldn't let someone else cut your arm. To stop cutting you've got to look at it from different points of view. Good luck!
-Sammi-
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Firstly, you're somewhat lucky by that you do have him at least-some people have nobody to turn to.
Do you think, though, that James would want you to cut however much he loves you and you love him?
There's many sites and books at the library which will help you and hopefully LOADS of better counsellers out there-what the one you talked to did to you was horrible. Don't be deterred by that.
It does sound like you're a little obsessive with James. Try to just begin talking to a few people in your classes, or something. You don't have to become best buds with them or anything like that but it might help to just have a couple of other people to talk to every now and again.
Good luck!
Sophie xxx
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i dont think your boyfriend would want you to cut. dont you think that a little obsessive? i mean i hate to say this, but what would happen if he left you? you cant just live for him. find a hobby, something that you like to do, or set a goal for yourself in school, anything to keep your mind off cutting, i mean you can still spend with james, but dont think about him every waking minute of your life. i think thats weird. you have to be more independent.
hope i helped, sorry if i didnt
=) martyna
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I know how you feel trust me. Exept I couldnt go to my boyfriend and tell him. It doesnt matter about that anyways now. But cutting is hard to stop and I got addicted to it to for a short period of time. My friends saw my arms and they asked me what it was so I told them. Then later on all of my friends found out. It totally sucked exept none of the teachers or my parents found out. The only people who knew were my friends. They made me stop and I still am trying soo hard to. But you can do it. I think its awesome that your boyfriend makes you feel great and that he comforts you! Maybe you can talk to one of your best friends about this and maybe she can help you out! The way I kinda stoped is my friends made a lil cut on their arm to make me stop and I relized how much I didnt want them doing it and I understood how they felt. It's also best if you talked to your friends also. It will help and they will help you get through it trust me. You are really lucky that your boyfriend comforts you. Think of him and dont cut. Do it for him. He doesnt want you to cut eather. I also want you to stop so please. x0 If you need anything else just IM me or leave it in my inbox! x0
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Stop feeling sorry for yourself? How "horrible" can your life be that you'd want to hurt yourself? People hurt themselves to EAT, to find food, risk their lives to actually be able to survive, and you're just whining. WHY are you cutting? Do you really think James wants you to cut yourself and hurt yourself and he has to comfort you over and over again? Do you think he wants to comfort you if you're never going to change? Helloooo. Welcome to denial.
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