Hello Everyone. I am Kaci. I am 18. I may be young, but I can give some good advice. If you ever need anything at all, do not heistate to ask. I'll help the best I can.
Gender: Female
Location: Tennessee
Occupation: Full Time College Student
Age: 18
AIM: xxbbyxitsxyouxx
Member Since: October 28, 2011
Answers: 322
Last Update: January 29, 2015
Visitors: 18542
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I had a Friend who was one of my best friends. In fact he was more like the little brother I never had.
About a month or so ago, he got back with his ex, who had cheated on him in the past. He said at the time, he felt like he was making a huge mistake, but he loved and missed her and she felt the same. I said as long as he was happy, I was happy.
Anyway, she recently kicked off at him about us being friends and he explained to her we are only mates and we have a brother/sister relationship. Bearing in mind He's 19, I'm 24 and I am actually engaged to my partner of 6 years and I love him.
There has never been anything more than that between us and never will be, we were just very close. Anyway she was fine with it after he'd explained.
She then kicked off about a week ago again, and sent me a message on facebook pretending to be him, saying don't ever speak to me again.
When I questioned him about it, he said he was sorry, but he couldn't speak to me ever again as he needed to save his relationship. I was absolutely devastated.
I then got a message off his girlfriend, saying she didn't appreciate our relationship as we "flirt" too much. Her interpretation of flirting is a few messages from me saying "hiya sweetheart are you having a good day?" or "have a good day babe"
We've always spoke to eac hother like that by the way.
She went on to explain that she dosen't like the manner in which we speak in and feels it's not acceptable for us to speak that way. I said to her she is obviously insecure because I have a partner of 6 years and I love him. There is absolutely no reason for her to think otherwise.
Anyway my friend said they had argued about it and now as a result he's cut all contact with me. She's told me never to speak to him again and she says that he says the same. She said she feels better now nobody is going to call "HER boyfriend" sweetheart.
I think it's absolutely ridicilous and I haven't stopped crying for days. Not only have I lost one of my best friends, I've also lost someone who was like my brother.
I'm so angry, hurt and upset because I know she's made him choose between us, and while I wouldn't have wanted him to choose her over me, I wish he would have valued me as a friend and told her straight that she is being ridicilous. It shouldn't have even come to this, there's never been anything more between us. I'm absolutely heartbroke, but I've respected what he's said and not contacted him, but I did message him saying that I'll always be here.
His girlfriend is obviously very jealous and insecure.
I just don't know how to deal with this. I know I can't do anything but she is controlling him and it breaks my heart.
When I apologised to her during our conversation for her being upset, she said fair enough, I know there's nothing going on between you. So why was there still an issue here?
He's blocked me on everything by the way. (link)
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Maybe you should message her or try to contact her in some way. Explain to her how you feel, and that you don't think its right that she made him pick between you and her. If she really loved him than she would never make him pick between ANYONE. But I will admit, I wouldn't want ANYONE, I don't care who it is- calling my boyfriend babe, or sweetheart either. That can be misunderstood as flirting, and it doesn't matter what you say about that- she won't believe it. All you can do is promise her that if she would have told you straight up that you calling him babe and sweetheart was what bothered her, than oyu would have gladly stopped to keep the friendship you cherish so much. She is insecure- only because you are in a committed relationship of 6 years, and she isn't allowing a friendship with someone of the opposite sex.
What is really messed up, is the reason why she is insecure, isn't because of her pyshical appearance, or trust issues- its because she is known to cheat, therefore, she believes he will cheat to 'get back at her'.
I can promise you, these two won't last long. HOpefully he won't stay too blinded by her and her controlling ways, but there is always a possiblity.
Now, she isn't the only bad person in this situation. He is as well. If he was a true friend, he wouldn't let ANYONE come between a friendship HE really CARES about. Trust me on this, when a guy has a friendship, and he puts 100% into it, and actually allows himself to trust someone with all his heart, he will not let NOTHING come between it. Therefore, he wasn't a real friend to begin with.
He will realize the mistake he made, when this low down cheats on him again and he is left wiht NO ONE because SHE let it be that way.
I'm sorry you are going through this. I know what it's like, I've been in your exact situation. It feels almost as bad as it does when you are actually in love with someone and they leave you for NO REASON. You're left with a million questions, heartbreak, and unwiped tears. You are left with no one to talk to, because whenever you felt similar to how you feel now, that person who you always went to, isn't there anymore.
It sucks. But it'll get better. He'll come back; maybe not ASAP- because he will feel too bad, and won't know what to say; but he'll come back.
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There's this guy, who moved to my school not long ago. We started talking as friends and we exchanged numbers, we still continued to talk as friends until our conversations got abit more flirty, he would call me “princess” he basically made me feel really special. I started to really like him, so I told him. His repsonse was “I'm too busy for this” and when I asked him what it meant he would say “I'm just too busy for all this, I can't be bothered” so I was left confused, he told me to meet him to speak face to face but then said something came up. I left it for about 2 weeks, then I sent him another message, asking him why he had made me feel special and then just dropped me all of a sudden and how much he meant to me. He replied with “I feel the same, we should be together” I replied saying “I really want to, but I'm scared” obviously I was scared in case he led me on again, then he replied saying “that wasn't me that was my mate” I continued to send texts after texts after texts and he wouldn't reply, but he would smile like nothing happened at school when I saw him :( and he still does now. I left him too it, weeks went by and he still always glanced at me from across the room and gave me a smile, some days I would smile back and some days I would be that angry and upset on what he's done to me, I looked away. I sent him another message the other night over the interent because I've just left school and I obviously won't see him as much, I may probably bump in to him around, but I said “I probably won't see you again, or as much anymore so I thought I'd just tell you that I do have feelings for you” he didn't reply, but definitely was online. I don't know what to do, this guy means so much to me and it really hurts. How should I react if I see him again? I've not seen him since that message the other night, what happens if I bump in to him? I can't honestly confront him to his face, I just don't have the courage and it's really really hard. Please help! Thanks. (link)
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You're only making it harder for yourself. This guy doesn't want you. He clearly doesn't know what he wants. You just keep going back for more and more. You're making yourself seem very desperate. He ignores you, and you keep sending him message, after message. Trust me, guys don't like a girl who can't take a hint.
If you know that he is leading you on, than leave him alone. Obviously his intentions are completely different from yours.
If you were to bump in to him again, than ignore him. Sure your heart make sink, and you may feel like you have to throw up, but ignore him.
I've learned from past experiences, that the SECOND you stop acting like you want someone, is the SECOND they want YOU. Act like you don't care anymore, and he may come around. I'm not promising anything, because all guys are different.
He just isn't ready for a relationship.
Leave him alone, and find someone worth your precious time.
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Hello all,
To put it shortly: I am very close to the family of my boyfriend (we've been together for more than two and a half years) and I am also friends with his dad on Facebook.
With this "latest" newsfeed you also see pictures that people like and whatnot and I see his dad liking the pictures of a page called "Startup needs lubricant" (Translated from German) Which doesn't really bother me. But this group uploads pictures of young women mostly showing off their breasts and asses in lingerie, etc, or just covering their nipples with the bare minimum.
I get it, they are sexy, provocative pictures, men are men, etc.
It just bothers me that I see his dad liking most of them. These are all skinny beautiful women with the perfect bum and perfect boobs. Firstly, I'm just bothered by knowing him so well and then seeing him like all this pictures.
Secondly, I feel very inadequate as the girlfriend now, although my boyfriend loves me as I am, he says I have the perfect boobs, legs and ass for him, it is not as if I am this skinny model type person.
I'm not sure why it bothers me, but I feel as if his dad considers me to be unattractive...
Is there any explanation to this? (link)
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Why would you care? Seems to me that you're attracted to his father, and you feel jealous that he's liking all these women which aren't you.
I just don't understand why you'd care if his dad thinks you're unattractive? If your BOYFRIEND thinks you perfect the way you are, than whats the problem? Obviously, you have some issues going on within for you to care THAT much about your boyfriends father liking women who are pretty & sexy.
All in all, you need to figure out why it bothers you so much and why it makes you feel that way. No one on here can answer your questions because we aren't 100% sure as to why;
If my advice I posted above offends you, I'm sorry in advance. Thats just how I see it, and it may not be the case, but girl, you need to thinka bout why you feel that way;
Its really not normal.
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So there's this guy, He used to go my school but then he moved. A couple of months ago he commented on my picture on facebook and told me I was cute then messaged me, we started talking and then he asked for my number so I gave it to him. At the time he had a girlfriend. He would text me everyday and say "good morning gorgeous" usually I would think that would be a cute thing to wake up to but I kind of feel like he was playing me since he had a girlfriend. So I would respond and be really short with him. I then saw about a week later his status on facebook was "went from a relationship to single" he would continue to text me and flirt with me, but I didnt flirt back with him because I didn't like him at the time. He would ask me questions about my sex life, and ask me if I had a boyfriend and all this stuff. I told him that I didnt have a boyfriend and to stop asking me questions like that and that I was willing to be his friend and thats all. He said he understood, and we continued to talk as friends. Then I realised he's really nice and cute and I want to get to know him better. but He hasn't texted me in 2 days, and when he doesnt text me it makes me really sad. but when he did text me he would creep me out and I would want him to leave me alone. What is wrong with me? I want to text him, but I feel like if I do i'll come off as annoying. Guys, when a girl texts you first do you find it annoying or do yall think its cute? What should I do?! i'm scared to make the first move? do yall think I should continue talking to him or not go down that road since he started talking to me while he had a girlfriend? (link)
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From past experiences, I would NOT go after him. Guys who do that kind of stuff behind there girlfriends back, will do it to you too.
He isn't worth it. I think you only get sad because you like the fact that someone is there to talk to. Save your time, and your feelings for someone who is faithful to a girl 100% regardless if its kissing, touching, or even talking.
I can promise you, that I bet you weren't the only girl he was texting while he was with his girlfriend. I also bet that he even cheated on her as well, which is why they ended. Girls dont just break up with guys because they flirt/text just one other girl. There was probabyl more involved.
Stay away from him, trust me sweeetie. He's a waste of time.
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OK so this guy asked me out. i like him and all but mostly as a friend but i wouldn't mind if we did but the thing is, is that i feel a bit embarrassed to date him. like I'm afraid that my friends would make fun of me 4 it. but i don't want to turn him down hes a good friend, and if i turn him down it will hurt him and rune our friendship. i really don't want to hurt him but i don't want people to know were dating and i don't want to sound like a jerk either..... please help me i don't know what to do and my friends don't give the best advice. so please please please help me tell me what to do. (link)
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First off, its your life. Not theirs. If they don't support your decision or your happiness than they aren't good friends.
Second off, don't date him just because you don't want to ruin the friendship. If you get with him for all the wrong reasons, and than act shady about it, it will ruin the friendship alot more worse than rejecting him.
Third off, if you like this boy, why would you be afraid of what people thought to the point you wouldn't want others to know you guys were dating? Thats very shallow. Just because he isn't the most popular guy, or the most attractive doesn't mean you can treat him this way. Guys that aren't the best looking, turn out to be the best boyfriends simply beacuse they don't get chances with girls very often, so when they do they treat them the way they want to be treated.
Looks are only skin deep. Looks can fade and people can become ugly with time. So the most sexiest guy in school won't be so sexy later on in life. Personality will always stay the same.
Obviously you don't really like this boy, or you wouldn't want to keep it from being known; so don't even bother. Tell him no because your shallow. You make get offended, but its the truth.
If you realize you do like him, than give him a chance. Who cares what others think. If they are going to judge you for it, than why you need them in your life?? Yes, they may talk for a few days, but after a week or so something else will be the "new" thing for people to gossip about.
I was in your position once. There was this guy, not attractive. but very very sweet. My friends always called him names, and made fun of him; than one day randomly he asked me out on a date. I told him yes. We went out, had a great time. Dated for 8 months. My friends respected my decision and ended up telling me how lucky I was to have such a great boyfriend. He was one of the best boyfriends I've ever had, and I will never regret dating him. He treated me like a real princess, and that doesn't come often these days.
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So basically my friend and I are like...bff. On day she texted me saying "I think we should spend some time as not best friends". I felt extremely mad and discouraged, but I knew I should keep cool. I answered saying "tell me why you are mad, and I will try to fix it". She said that there is no way of fixing it and that she doesn't want to forgive me. The text messages have been going on for about a month now, and when we see each other in person at school we she completely ignores me. I really miss my friend. How can I get her back? (link)
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Well it would kind of help to know what you did to hurt her, or make her mad.
So if you don't mind sharing, just send me a message to my inbox and I'll help you out!
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it was months ago now but ive just realised that ove done something intentionally. i had a party and told my friend a month before but she said she didnt know if she wanted to come. on the day my mum told me to invite her again but i decided i would wait til 7:10 to invite her so she might not bother coming, when the party started at half past. she was looking after her nan as her grandad had died four months ago and when i did ring her it was at 8, later than i thought and her mum got upset and they dont want anything to do with me this guilt is taking over me, she said she wants nothing to do with me but diesnt know i did it intentionally as ive just realised myself, shes haapy now, should i confess or leave her carry on with her life, it was 5 mnths ago? (link)
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You've already posted this question twice already; and from what I've seen you didn't get anyone to help you.
So I'll try.
Let her carry on with her life. It will not do any good. This girl is thinking that you did it by accident, and yet still doesn't want anything to do with you. If she finds out that you did it on purpose, it won't change anything; it'll only make it worse. It's been 5 months, you feeling guilty is normal. Why you would do this to a friend, I dont know. But in my book, you aren't a good friend. I'd get over it, because nothing you can say or do will change it.
Your only human, and you make mistakes. Learn from it, and don't repeat this with future friends.
If you feel like you need to say something to this chick, than atleast apologise. I'm sure if you called her, she would probably just hang up, but can you blame her?
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See the thing is that her and I have two mutual friends. And we're all having a friends Christmas after Christmas so I feel like if I do that then its going to make it akward at the friends Christmas and I don't want that. (link)
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Oh, I understand. Have you tried talking to her about it? Maybe she doesn't realize thats she's treating you the way she's treating you. I'd really talk to her, and see what she has to say. If she doesn't seem like it's bothering her that you guys are drifting apart, I'd tell your mutual friends than you will not be able to attend the Christmas thing, because you don't want to be around your bestfriend and/or Maggi.
I know that will suck, and you don't want to do that to your other friends, but if the chick isn't going to be nice and fair to you, than I wouldn't want any part of that.
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Okay so this is going to be long sorry. So my best friend, lets call her Mindy, and I joined basketball cheering together with my other friend Nikki and Mindy's friend Maggi. So the first day of practice there was a girl missing and the couch asked Maggi what the girl looked like and then Maggi statrted talking shit about the girl. So then the girl found out and the next day at school she comfronted Maggi, then teachters got involved makeing it a bigger deal the it was. So that day at practice Maggi goes to the couch and tells her what happened and then she started making a list of people it could have been. Well on that list was my friend Nikki and Maggi started talking shit about her too, thus proving that she talks shit. Well the next day my friend Mindy started being distent with me and not talking to me and when i would talk to her she would give me one word answers. So later that day I found out that Maggi had told Mindy that I was the one to tell what she said. There were 10 other girls that heard it ! So at lunch we brought up the subject (me, mindy,& Nikki)and Mindy straight out defended Maggi instead of me her best friend and she still wasn't talking to me so I didnt talk to her either. Then two days later she sends me a message asking why I was mad and I said I wasn't and that she stopped talking to me so then she said sorry and we went back to talking. But the problem is she is still distent with me and its pissing me off and when Maggi is around she completely ignorce me. Everyone says that she treats me like shit and that shes never there for me which is partly true. What do i do i'm going to her varsity dinner with her on Wensday and I don't want us to be like that. Should I keep trying or just give up on my best friend since 4th grade? she 16 and im 15 (link)
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I'd give it up. She isn't a real bestfriend. Best Friend's don't believe other people over their "best friend". If she ignores you around this Maggi chick, than I wouldn't want a part in her friendship. You need a good, real friend; not just a part time friend. I think the only reason why she apologised to you is because she didn't want the akawardness in class and/or the fued between you too.
If anything, I'd slowly let myself drift apart from her, and what not. That doesn't mean that you should be mean to her, or sink to her and Maggi's level, but simply be the bigger person and just realize that you don't need what these girls, ESPECIALLY YOUR BESTFRIEND, are doing to you.
As of the Varsity Dinner situation, I'd be the bigger person, and just be nice. Just do what you have to do to get through it in a calm, cool, collected manner. If your so called "best friend" notices you acting differently, than you need to tell her,
" Look, here lately, after that big deal between Maggi blaming me for telling on all those girls; you've been treating me differently. You ignore me when Maggi's around, and when she isn't, its not like how it was before. I don't want to fight with you, and I don't want to end on bad terms; I just simply realized I don't need what you have to offer as my best friend; and I'm better off like this."
That way, things in class won't be akaward for you guys; instead of being bestfriend, you guys will be acquaintances (sp)
Good Luck!
Need anything else, inbox me!
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So I might hang out with my friend (n) on friday and my other "friend" (g) is jealous I'm hanging out with n so g invited me over just to make sure we don't hang out. It pisses mi off how jealous she is. G drives me nuts, she even called my mom and texted her to see if it's ok to hang out. So now my ma said I should go and if n can hang out than g has to come. I'm super mad and don't want g because she always texts when we hang out. She never talks to me in school too! (link)
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You need to stop being friends with her. Real friends will be your friend inside and outside of school. I use to have a friend like yours (G) and I felt like I was dating a controlling boyfriend. It was terrible. You have to tell her either how you feel,
or stop being friend with her. Sadly, people like this don't change, they will always be like this until something forces them too;
Its not right that she is basically controlling you from hanging with this new girl.
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I kno this is gonna be stupid to ask. Ok see I only have one friend, people hate when I talk to her and often get jealous and dis include me. I want to hangout with this one friend but when I finally have the courage to ask (cuz I have social issues) someone comes right out of no where and asks her to hangout. She really wants to be my friend. She's a great person. She has been on my side for everything and helped me through alot. I think we arent as good as friends because we hardly hangout. I don't know what to do. (link)
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You ask her.
Regardless if someone else askes her, make plans with her for a different day,
Like this,
"Hey (her name), I was wondering if you'd like to hang out sometime this week?"
And if she says yes ask her, what day? and than when that day comes, plan to go to a movie, or something she likes to do.
Or you can ask her for her number so yall can talk out of school.
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i became really good friends with a guy and we would text all the time. we were really close, but a few weeks ago, things started getting weird. he wouldn't talk to me, and he stopped texting me. i tried texting him once and it felt awkward. i keep waiting, thinking that he is going to try to talk again, but i'm afraid that isn't going to happen. i don't want to keep bugging him. i think i have to let him go...i just need some comfort (link)
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You deserve a friend so much better than that! There is a positive thing to this situation: Good you found out that he wasn't such a good friend now, than years down the road.
Going from being good friends with someone to complete strangers is tough. It makes you wonder how come its so hard for them to just reply back to let you know that they aren't mad at you and you guys are still friends.
I would let him go. You know what you need to do, and all you have to do is simply, DO IT.
Your a strong person and I'm sure you can do it just fine. Delete him out of your life like he did you. When you feel like its tough going with out his friend ship, you have to ask yourself, "Do I want a PTF or a real friend?)
*PTF=Part Time Friend
You deserve fulltime friend, not just someone who is there for you when its convient for him!
Good luck!
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i am in love with my best friend, who told me that she used to have a crush on me but decided it was too awkward and that we couldnt be together. But now i cant stop thinking about her and i get butterflies in my stomach every time i see her or think about her. I dont know if i can tell her how i feel because if i tell her she might not want to talk to me anymore and i dont want to lose her. Also i am a girl, and both of us are bisexual. which poses a problem because if we did get into a relationship, i could never tell my parents or my friends because i havent come out of the closet yet, and she has only come out to her mom. Im worried that if i try to tell my parents about it then they will just make fun of me because neither of them take anything seriously. I REALLY like this girl, but i have no idea what to do about it...please help (link)
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I'd would tell her! Being bisexual is perfectly fine. It may take your parents a little bit to understand and soak it in, but they will always love you unconditional dispite what they don't agree on for you.
You have to think though, its normal for girls to have sleep overs and what not, so if you aren't comfortable telling you parents, you could always make it a secret until you know that it will work out great. You could always invite her over to stay the night and than be affectionate behind closed doors. Parents would never allow a sleepover with a dude, or even sleep in the same bed;
but since she's a girl, I think your okay.
Just relax and tell her how you feel; let her know if it bothers her, than you would rather have her as a friend rather than nothing at all!
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i dont wana say this i need help. me and my best friend had sex and now everyday we hangout we go at it like rabbits its not like regular sex we wear kinky outfits and and she shove a cucumber up both our ass i wana know shouldd we stop (link)
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Thats up to you. Using food products isn't a good idea. You could always go to a sex store and buy dildo's that come in different shapes and sizes. Those would be a little better since thats what dildo's are made for.
Idk what your gender is, but if your a guy and your bestfriend is a girl, wear protection or you could have a baby.
Good luck,
if you need anything else, please dont heistate to inbox me!
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Ok so I never get invited anywhere!!! It's super annoying my friends know how alone I'm. They invite I'm places then cancell on me 2 mins later to be with someone else. I h8 it. At lunch they talk about hanging out with each other in front of my face. One girl in the group is super nice to me and includes mi. I want to hang out with her and others but she's always busy Bcuz ppl are lik obsessed with her and stuff. I'm not but shes my only friend and aren't friends supposed to hang with each other. (link)
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Man, I'm sorry your "friends" are treating you this way. I know how it feels. I use to get so mad and jealous when my friends would ditch me, and than brag about how much fun they had around me.
You need to put your foot down. Stand up to these so called "friends". You need to let them know how you feel, and ask them how come they are always ditching you. I am not the type of person who believes in revenge or anything, but it seems like these girls need a taste of their own medicine.
If I was you, I would defintely find new friends. I'm sure your a great person, who can find friends easily. Once you start making better, reliable friends. Your old friends will come running back to you in no time, and than you can finally tell them all the tihngs they have been telling you.
Don't feel bad though. Them acting like this is actually a good thing. There showing you that they are not REAL friends, and that YOU can find so much better!
Good Luck
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How to get some one back in your life that used to mean so much to you? (link)
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You know, I was struggling with the same thing. I had a bestfriend for 5 years; we were closer than a set of siblings. We didn't everything together, she was literally all I had during those 5 years. She met a guy, lost her virginity to him, and he told her to stop being friends with me. She did. I was devistated. I literally felt like I lost my other half. I didn't really have any other friends; I devoted all my time to her. Do I regret it? NO. Not at all. Do I miss it? Yes, of course.
I know your kind of wondering, "Why the heck are you telling me all that",
To inform you, its a way of life. It's been two years since we stoppd being friends; I recently wanted her back in my life, since we are in college together. She stayed the night, we hung out a couple of times; but things just aren't the same. She changed, majorly. She has her own bestfriend, just like I was when I was hers. It just hit me that you know, everything happens for a reason, and I can accept it and move on, or grieve about it.
Sorry if you don't find the information useful, but all I can tell you, is try.
Don't give up. Unless you feel like there is no point anymore. Like I did.
You can either accept the way things are, or you can stay stuck in the past with all the memories. If you really want this person back in your life, you have to ask yourself, "Why did we stop being close in the first place?"
Is it fixable?
Does this person have any interest in being close with you again?
All you can really do, is text, call, IM, voicemail them and tell them you want to meet up, you need to get some things off your chest. If that seems too awkaward for you, than just say it through a text. You could ask, "What happen to us?
" and see why the other person feels why you guys have drifted apart.
I hope this helped; sorry I bored you with my life story.
Good Luck, if you need anything else, please do NOT heistate to send me an email at xxbbyxitsxyouxx@aol.com, or simply just inbox me.
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