when i do something my cousin always tries to do it better than me even if she isn't interested in what it is she just wants to prove she can do it better
Competition and rivalry is very common between cousins and siblings. And as the years go on it fades away. I use to be the same with my cousins when I was growing up and then after a while I started to realize that not everything was a competition. Its normal especially if the person it very competitive.
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Im a preteen so I understand this might b a little weird for my age.Well I hav this cousin and shes like in her 20's . Well any ways shes my favorite cousin and we used to spend a lot of time together. But now that shes starting a family I cant spend any time with her and plus she lives in a different city than I do now. She haves a new born and i dont want to tell her that i feel like we dont spend any time together anymore. I just dont know what to do. And I hav no cousins my age to tlk to or to b my favorite cousin. I need some help plz and thank u
Its normal that you guys don't hang out anymore. Shes going through a transition in her life with a new baby, it can be very time consuming. I went through something similer with one of my older cousins. I say you give her alittle time to settle down with her family and then maybe ask her if you can go over her house or if you guys can hang out one day. I'm sure she'd love to spend some time with you. Hope I helped.
~Jani~
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I'm not good at dealing with this sort of things, so I need help.
I left my facebook account open and my mom went on and read all my messages and replied to all saying I was grounded and wasn't allowed friends till I am 18, which is two years from now. I think it's unfair that she went through ALL MY STUFF. Without my permission.
In a way your mom was wrong in looking on your Facebook and your messages. But you also shouldn't have left it open for anyone to go on it. I suggest that you talk to you mom and ask her why it was that she did that. Maybe she found something in your messages that upset her. There must have been a reason for her to react so strongly. Also try to remember to log out of your Facebook because someone else besides your mom could have gone on it. Hope I helped.
~Jani~
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The only thing is, is that if I ask my mom to move in with the family friend then she will flip. She wouldn't even let me go anywhere. The way I escape all this is by leaving on the weekends with friends because they know what I'm living in. They hate that I have to deal with this. I really don't know how to bring this up to my mom...or should I talk to the friend and have her bring it up first. I really don't know what to do... I just don't want to live like this anymore.
okay have your friend bring it up first, is the friend an adult? if they is then the friend should bring it up first. you shouldn't have to live like this so deffainatly move in with this friend wether your mom approves or not because she isn't being a good mother. let the adults handle this. let me know if you need anything else.
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I'm just turning 15 and have been living alone with my mother for 3 years now. We live only on my 600 dollars a month (which is mine because my dad died in 2008) but I never see/get any of the money. Also, she constantly leaves me home alone, all night, so I fend for myself. I have to ask repeatedly for personal necessities and rarely ever get them, my friends and their parents normally get them for me. She smokes A LOT so I am stuck in the smoke filled trailer all day, even with my constant case of bronchitis because of it. And she refuses to stop smoking to help my health. I'm always sick but never get to go to the doctor because she says "It costs too much. You're fine." The two months prior to this month (April and May of 2011) she gambled my 600 dollars away so every day I came home from school, I didn't know where "home" would be. And that's not the first time she has ever done it either. Actually, to be honest, I'm not comfortable around my mom or her boyfriend. I literally hate both of them. I know that's a lot to say, but I do. I would much rather live with a close family friend who has already said she would take me in. I just don't know how to approach this process. I want to be taken care of and feel like I'm loved, not just left home, I'm tired of it. So anyway, I would like some advice on: 1) If I'm right to not want to live with my mother and 2) how to begin the process of leaving her. I thank anyone who responds to this question.
--Sincerely, Me
okay first of yes you are right.your 15 you should be taken care of and not have to fend for yourself all the time. you should feel loved and your mom is not providing that. thats called neglect. second i think you should move in with the family friend and i think that that adult should talk to your mom about you moving in. this is not something you should be dealing with. i hope i helped, i would really like to know how this turns out.if you have anymore questions feel free to ask.
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17/f 21/m
I dated this guy when I was 15 and got pregnant. I broke up with him when I was 4 months pregnant because he was very controlling, manipulative, emotionally abusive, intimidating...etc. He never hit me but he has left bruises on me because he grabbed my arms too hard. He got married, and I knew his wife before they started dating. He came to see the baby for 3 months, dipped for 8 months, came back, and now he hasnt seen her in a month or 2 'because of work'. He doesnt pay child support but I dont want to pursue it because I dont want him to get any kjnd of custody.
This week, he was arrested and I found out that he has been physically violent towards his wife the whole time. She sent me a picture of her black eye. She got a restraining order on him and she suggested I do the same. Now im terrified of him because he has anger towards me and I now know what hes capable of. I have a few questions:
-i really dont want him apart of my or my childs life because hes unstable and dangerous. Hes not on the birth certificate either. Is it wrong for me to cut off all contact from him and not let him see the baby?
-hes from peru and was not a citizen, but his wife is. Did that automatically make him a citizen? Or did he still have to apply? Because she wants to try to get him deported. (he already has a pretty large record)
Any other advice is welcome, thank you !
okay the answer below pretty much covered everything except that since his wife was a citizen and they got married it makes him a resident so he would still have to apply to become a citizen. good luck.
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20/F
Iv'e been told mean things by my family and being told those things has caused me to not think highly of myself & not be motivated also be lazy and think that what i want to achieve isn't worth trying to achieve anymore i feel like giving up completely and think that my life isn't worth living and i'd be better off dead and i will never be good enough for my family also feel like nothing i do is right i'm having a hard time motivating myself i keep remembering all the mean things my famiy has told me & i'm starting to believe that maybe what their saying is true i feel like i'm a failure who's worthless & a nobody how do i motivate myself & how do i stop thinking the things i am? Without letting what's
been said to me get in the way
Ignore what your family is saying. Their probably just jelaous. try and set little goals for yourself and then once you achieve one then you will feel more motavated and to do the next. and then soon all these little goals can lead to one big achievement. don't listen to your family because they are just trying to put you done so that you become what they say you will. don't let them win. get ahead in life and show them that you are something in life. hope this helps.
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I'm 17 turning 18 and i'm a girl.
Whenever there is a silence in the house, my parents always bring up the subject about my future, they always say stuff like 'what will you do when you grow up'. When i tell them i do not know, or i can't decide, my dad just said that i'm some sort of highschool dropout even though i get Bs or As, sometimes Cs in my classes. They're always saying stuff like: you're such a disappointment, can't you do anything right?, why can't you care about your future?, you are so ungrateful, etc. They never praise me, and if i do manage to get a good grade average, they say stuff like: you better keep it this way, why can't it be like this all the time?
One of the worst things is that my mom puts words in my mouth, she rants on and on about how her friend's daughters are so successful yet i'm not. And whenever i do something wrong i get yelled at for about an hour about it. And sometimes my mom says stuff like: maybe i should just leave and never come back, i'm so tired of you, you make me miserable.
What should i do? I'm afraid to stand up to them because they might kick me out. Thanks to their ranting and insults, i actually have a phobia of being wrong. I always expect someone to lash out at me or something. Sometimes i think they don't know how much to hurts for them to say these things about me. They even talk behind my back even if i'm there in the same room. Please help!
this is wrong what they are doing. they should not be putting you down. what you need to do is talk to them. they might not realize they are even doing this. marbe if you talk to them they will stop. hope this helps.
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I really can't handle my mom. Like, I really can't. She use to be my BEST friend, but now she's like crazy. I stayed home while going to the university. It's been 2 years now, which means I have 2 years left. I've been thinking of transferring to another university, because I feel like my mom isn't letting me live. She doesn't respect my schoolwork or academics. She doesn't understand all the work I have to do. She doesn't congratulate me on my grades. She's extremely jealous. Every time I have a date or I'm out with a friend, she gets super jealous, texts me every five minutes, asks me when I'm coming home. If I'm with a guy, she'll call me constantly. She always wants to drop me off and pick me up, whether it's a date or whether I'm going to a nightclub. If I'm at the library, she's worried about the time she has to pick me up when I just got there. It's really too much already. I feel like I'm going to lose my patience and flush my phone down the toilet. Some things are out of love, and I understand that. But, it's become an unhealthy obsession. She goes out and buys me like $200 worth of clothes, when she knows I needed that money to buy books and she didn't let me use it. She thinks I'm like this barbie. Right now, I just want to get away from her. She's annoying me SO much! But... here's the issue. My university is my home. It's where my friends are. It's where everything is. I'm involved in 8 organizations at school. She's not even proud of that because they don't pay me any money for it. But... I just got awarded like this special thing to do for next semester. It's kind of hard to explain if you don't come here, but it's an honor. I don't know if I should just leave everything I've worked so hard here for. Then, transferring all those credits. I may have to repeat courses if they don't transfer and all of that. I'm already here. I could just work really hard and try to graduate fast so I can move out of the house. Even if I were working, I still wouldn't be able to move out because I live in an expensive city. My only way out is either finish fast and leave to another university. I love my school. I wouldn't want to leave just because she's annoying me, but it has crossed my mind because I just don't think I can handle it anymore.
Please help!
okay this has gotten way to out of control. shes not letting you be you age and live. you need to sit down with her and have a serious talk with her. she should not be acting this way. let her know that she is driving you away! but dont go to another university you shouldnt have to leave the school you love because of your mom. hope this helps good luck!
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I'm 12 years old and my younger brother is basically 11. My mom has to spend days reminding him to do stuff like dishes or laundry but he never gets in trouble. My mom said if he didn't do the dishes on a certain day he wouldn't get his Ps2 right, he doesn't do it and the day after he gets it. Me, she told me to clean my room in an hour she never said when I had to start doing it and if I would get punished, after I do my home work(which takes an hour) my mom comes in and says, "Not done? No T.V. for a week." I clean my room after and nope, nothing I'm still T.V. free. Another example, there's no swearing in our house. I call Ethan a "dumbo" 'cause he's got big ears and I get my art rights taken away. He calls me a F---ing F--- and my mom says,"Don't say that to your sister. I'd get it if he was like maybe 4 or 5 years younger but this is too much.
his spoiled. your mom spoils your brother and trust me i knows how it feels. you have to let your mom know that she is doing it. my mom was the same with my brother and after talking to her and givingher a few examples of how she does it she changed and stoped soiling him. hope this helps good luck!
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My mom has been my bestfriend, the person who i could run to if or when i'm feeling down, i told her everything, we talk about everything, i always thought she was honest with me because she is a christian... My dad died when i was 12, we were sooo close and since then i 've never been the same, about 3yrs after i learnt that he wasn't my dad, from her mouth, for a month straight i couldn't look in the mirror straight because it was like i never recognize myself, my reflection....i didn't know who i was, now i don't even know how to trust her anymore.
i know you must feel really betrayed right know but your mom probably didn't tell you before because she saw how close you and your dad were and she didn't want to ruin the. your mom had her heart in the right place. i know it might seem like you cant forgive her but think about it if you knew that he wasnt your real father before would it had been the same? your mom had your best intreast in mind and in time you will learn to forgive her.
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My dad used to smoke and I know he still does because he has about 1000 lighters and he always smells of smoke. I love him so much and want him to be around for a long time. He doesn't know that I know. He also is overweight and doesn't go to the doctor. What do I do? I can't stop worrying about him!!!
Talk to him. if you are worried then talk to him and tell hem that you know that he is smoking. tell him that you love him and you are worried about his health. and ask him to please stop smoking or to at least go to the docter and see if everythings okay for you. let your dad know what your feeling.
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Whenever my mum sees me she points out everything that is bad about me. For example, I have just had my hair cut, and when I got home, she said she hated it. She said it was too thin, not long enough etc. I just feel so upset about my life and I want to die.
Tell your mom that it is hurting your feelings what she is say to you, because you never know she might not realise shes hurting you. and if she keeps doing it then just ignore her. if it helps make a list of all the good, positve things about yourself and when you feel this way again read it to yourself and it will make you feel better.
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My name is Michael, Im 15 and a freshman in high school.
I live with my mom, dad, and sister. My mom is emotionally abusive to me, and is psycho beyond belief. My sister helps me get through the tough times, but next year shes going away to college and won't be here. My dad feels sorry for me, but won't help me at all. Ive been dealing with it, but today just sent me over the top. I came home today, and was going out to dinner with my friends. I went to my stash of money, and looked at it. Well, i noticed that it looked off. I blew it off, grabbed a 20 and went to dinner. Well i came home and counted my money. It turns out im missing 80 bucks!!! I have had the stash of money, for a while, and i keep up with how much is there everyday. I have made no purchases with that money in a while, so someone at home, had to of stolen it. My mom yelled at me when i confronted her, and told me to stop lying and that i was a piece of sh*t for asking her about it. I can't take this anymore, and i dont know where to go, or what to do!!
Don't run away! that is deffinatly not the answer. i say you get a box or safe with a lock that has a combo that noone knows. that way if someone wanted to steal your money they couldn't. and for your mom what she is doing is wrong but the only thing you can do is wait until graduation and then your off to collage. i am your age and can relate to the situation and runing away from your problems never works.
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