hey yall im Deana im 16 i go to ghs and i love giving yall advice so dont be shy and drop me a question and ill answer it the best i can!
Gender: Female
Location: texas
Occupation: student
Age: 16
AIM: gilmoregirl21291
Member Since: July 10, 2005
Answers: 205
Last Update: October 12, 2007
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texas_girl
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I'm temporarily in a long distance relationship with my bf (as in, we were together when he went away to work, and he will be coming back in a few months.) However, it's not going very well. I know he's going out and having fun all the time and I'm not angry about that or anything, but it just makes me feel a bit lonely and jealous. He doesn't seem to make much effort to contact me either and whenever we do talk it's like I've sent him a text message first or I've IMd him first, and he always seems so distracted. He never says he misses me unless I say it first.
A month or so before he went I told him I loved him and he didn't say it back cos he didn' t want to til he truly meant it, which had a massive strain on our relationship. The day before he went I told him upset that I seemed to care more about him going than he did, and all he said was that he only cared in a good way because he was excited for this opportunity. But the thing is, when we started out, it all went really well, and in fact he was the one to pursue ME and I was the one that had to be convinced into liking him!!! I'm missing those days (and him) so much.
I really don't know what to do :( I don't want to break up with him, but I don't know what to say to him either. I'm going to visit him pretty soon which because of cash will be the only time I can when he's away, so that might be some help... someone please help me, I'm getting really upset about this.
.xoxoxo
(link)
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im basically in the exact same situation, but i broke up w/ mine yesterday. i dont know what were going to do. but i think if your going to see him soon that you should try to hold out until then and when you get to see him see if your feelings are still the same. i think you need to talk to him about yall situation. basically here is how i thought about it: you have all the peices to build something really amazing and beautiful, but some of the most important peices ar really heavy and you cant lift them by yourself. when you try you strain yourself and it hurts. you never get anywhere b/c if the other person isnt putting in the effort you are, it cant be built. i think if he said that he didnt want to tell you he loved you until he really meant it that it was a good idea b/c thats what i said to mine and he really appreciated that. because honestly, would you really want him to say it if he wasnt sure he even meant it? it really is alot to think about, but just try to stay strong. yall need to discuss whether or not you want to stay together, just casually date, be friends or what the other wants. good luck, and i hope it all works out!
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i'm not all guy crazy like my friends are, i don't go to the mall and go ohh hes hott! i am not like that, even close, i dont even walk by guys and judge them. there is this kid i have kinda had my eye on this past school year but again nothing major. my best friend has been friends with him forever so he is always over her house when i am there, we go swimming at night there and its a long story but she asked him and i to go swim around the pool and flirt for a while, i was glad to cause i kinda like him. so we flirted and when it was totally dark he swam by me and pulled my bathing suit bottom and then grabbed my top(he knew my strings were double knotted so he grabbed the front like my boob)it seems bad but it wasnt and i laughed so the next night we were all swimming and we kinda flirted on our own so later i had my friend say it looks like you and ash were flirting do you like her? and i guess he said yes! i want him to ask me out but how would i like cross his line between liking me and asking me out? wat could i do? (link)
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ive got a similar issue
the best advice i can give you is to not over-flirt
i dont think you would, but sometimes when girls do they come off a little crazy. If he likes you and knows you found out and then you start acting different, he might not like you any more
and thats REALLY hard. I would just try talking to him like normal and flirt, but not anything out of your comfort zone. he should get the hint and ask you soon but be patient, guys can be pretty oblivious. Keep doing what youve been doing and he should start liking you more and more until he asks! good luck
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i'm sort scared that my boyfriend and i are growing apart and if i do talk to him,not much changes.i just want to know if breking up with him is what i should do.i wana stay together but i also want to do whats best for us.i just don't know what that is... (link)
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i think you should talk to him about it
find out if he feels the same way
discuss it and come to a decision together
because if you dont, and you decide that the relationship cant take anymore, he might be confused why yall are breaking up.
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How to flirt with a guy so good that they will change their mine about not dating you. (link)
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confidence can get you so far. its totally possible for a guy not to like you but then realize a bit later that your amazing and then they like you. it happens all the time. just dont be fake because that causes problems. be yourself (wow that sounds lame) and everything should fall into place. show him how much fun you are to be around, how well you treat people, how you can be funny and also laugh at yourself. if you can make him see that your a good person who knows, he may change his mind, but if he doesnt, dont sweat it, guys can be oblivious jerks, it just means your better off with someone else. good luck!
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alright, i know this may sound stupid, but how exactly do you flirt with a guy, especially, if he's a good friend? any tips would also be good (link)
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i was really confused about this too a while ago b/c i have alot of guy friends and i wanted one to think of me as more than a friend. one of them and i go after school together everyday to one of our teachers and get candy. just stupid little things like that make it easier to be alone w/ them and flirt. guys love it when girls are confident and sweet. just be yourself which i know sounds so cliche! being nice-sarchastic can work really well too b/c then you make them laugh and you laugh too and you can show them how much fun you are to be around. then before you know it they start questioning whether or not you should be more than "just friends" you dont have to be cheesey or slutty when you flirt, just by taking all of your insecurity barriers down and putting yourself out there which i know is so hard is a great first step. and remember, smiling alot works wonders!
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i like or liked this guy. he used to go to my school and i was like totally in love with him for a whole year. he wasn't my boyfriend though. but we talked a lot. and i loved him so much.
anyway then he went to a different/better school. i never heard from him since but i missed him a lot and still loved him. i even saw him twice one time i visited our school but he didn't see me. and the other time i saw him walking on the street.
anyway there is this guy in my school and he is really hot and cute. and he always smiles at me. everytime he sees me he stares at me for a long time. and he is a lot like the other guy who left the school. thats the weird thing. and everytime i see him i get so nervous in my stomach. but only when HE looks at me. when other guys smile at me it means nothing to me
so do you think i like this guy?? and what about the other guy? (link)
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it might now be that you like him, but just that he reminds you so much of a person you used to like. Your just being reminded of someone you used to have a crush on and falling for that memory. I would get to know this guy in your school before you decided if you liked him or not. If you like him for his looks, b/c he reminds you of that guy, its just a harmless crush. good luck!
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there is this guy that i think i like (he treats me how i wanted to be treated).but i also heard rumors in school about him that he cheated on his ex girlfriend in the past. I asked him about it and he told me that he did and that was because he hated his girlfriend. He says he likes me and always wants to hang out but i always tell him he cant come over and i cant leave my house. I tell him that because im the kind of girl who gets attached to easy to everything. i wanna hang out with him and be with him but im scared because of the rumors. we talk all the time on the phone and he tells me all kinds of sweet things that makes me smile thats what makes me like him. What if we do go out and he leaves for Oklahoma n January? What am i going to do without him? and no i hate long distance relationships.
well my questions are..
1)should i believe the rumors?
2)how can i hang out with him without getting attached?
3)if he leaves and we are together how could i handle that? or should i even go out with him? (link)
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Ok well first off, rumors are rumors, and you said he owned up to them so hes not lying about cheating on his girlfriend. I would be really paranoyed if i had a boyfriend that cheated on a girl in the past. and for what i know, if you like him, the more your around him will just make you like him more. For example, I like this guy in one of my classes and when i see him i just start liking him more and more. I think IM and the phone are your best bet. or hanging out in groups of friends could keep you from getting as attached then you would if it were just you and him. Its hard when a boyfriend leaves and your still dating. Its not that long distance relationships dont work out, its just theres so much stress that goes into them. People get paranoyed, they start missing their boyfriend/girlfriend and feel really lonely and theres nothing they can do about it so they feel helpless. It really all depends on you, if he likes you and you like him you can probably give it a shot and then hanging out wouldnt be a problem. but like i said, him leaving would be really hard. It all matters on how much pain you can handle. The pain of not knowing what would happen, or the pain of knowing and something bad happening, like cheating or moving away. But if i were you, I would take the risk, a broken heart almost always heals. good luck!
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ok i'll try to make this short... I have a boyfriend he lives about 2 hours away from where i live and i never get to see him... then theres this guy at my school that I like alot. I want to brake up with my boyfriend but before we got together he was sucidul and i dont want him to kill himself because of me... I dont know what to say when we brake up... what do I do? (link)
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omg that happened to me!! my ex was suicidal and i wanted to dump him but i was afraid he would so something stupid! you just need to talk to him and tell him in the nicest possible way that you care sooo much about him and that it would be wrong for you to lead him on, that the distance is too much for you to handle and that you think its best if you both see different people. tell him you still want to be friends and talk, and reassure him that if he ever needs to talk to someone that your their for him. good luck!
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me and my b/f have been datin for almost 6 months. hes means so much to me but a lot of the time she doesnt treat me that well. im a freshman thie year and was considering breakin up wit him b/c i never see him and just felt too tired dwon.but then i chagned my mind and figuared i really loved him. but today this kid who knows him and me came up ot me and said that he wasnt breakin up wit me because he wanted to move on...i was feelin the same thing but i like him so much still. i sent him a text saying that we needed to talk and he said ill pass! and i said..were over.ur friend jeff told me everything..and he said..yull get far listenin ot him...i mean i ended a really long realtionship wit this guy and im not sure if i should beg for him back or just move on....help me pleeeease =).thanks so much (link)
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when your confused, as to whether making the choice of moving on or begging, its best to just wait a bit and let your head clear. that happened to me and i ended up back wit the guy, but it wasnt because i missed him, it was because i needed closure. that may be what you need. so wait like a week before you make any drastic decisions, as for now move on, but if your heart is saying get back w/ him then listen. even if it doesnt work out, you should atleast talk things out in a civil way. good luck!
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i feel so weird because im 15 and i havent had my first kiss yet. is this normal? (link)
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im 15 and ive never been kissed
i think its normal
and besides, when you get your first kiss it will probably be really special
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Why don't most girls like it when guys say that they are hot. Isn't that a compliment? What's the big deal? (link)
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its not that we dont like it when guys call us hott, it just means more whenever they say beautiful or gorgeous! cute and pretty work too but usually when guys say it, it goes something like this "dude shes hott!" or "your like, really hott" its not that its not appreciated but if a guy were to say " i think your beautiful" it would make a girl feel special. its not a big deal but like one of my best friends is freaking gorgeous and the guys that usually call her "hott" just want to get in her pants, thats why it can be offensive. hope that cleared things up some!
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I really like this girl but am to afrain to ask her out or talk to her from fear of rejection. I really like her and want a relationship but i dunno what to do. Any advice? (link)
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if you dont even try talking to her then youll never know! just approach her and talk. you dont have to ask her out right off the bat. make a point to get to know her. find out what she likes, what shes interested in, what you 2 have in common. that should build the ground for a solid relationship. show her that you are interested in getting to know her. once your comfortable around her it will be easier to ask her out. do it in a casual way, something like hanging out at the mall or the park or something. tell her your going and you think it would be cool if you 2 could go and hang out. good luck and dont be scared!
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there's this boy i've only seen once in person, more than a month ago. we talk on msn a lot and around a week ago he told me he liked me...so i said i did too, but i don't really know if i do, because i only started liking him after he told me he liked me, well i kind of liked him before, but not that much...so was i just falling in love with love? i'm also kind of embarassed to say that i think he won't like me anymore because i cut my hair since i saw him last and it's a fauxhawk type of thing...and i told him that, but he didn't seem to care. so i guess my questions are:
1. do i really like him?
and
2. do you think he won't like me b/c i look different or should i think it's a good sign that he didn't say anything bad about it? (link)
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if he doesnt like you b/c you look different then he isnt worth your time, and you may like him but i understand the falling in love w/ love thing. Meet up with him agian and see how things go, if it all works out really well then go for it! and well, if it a bit awkward than maybe it just wasnt ment to be. you said he didnt seem to care about your hair so he probably does like you. i say you give him a chance because if you don't then you'll wonder what would have happened if you did! good luck!
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How far do you think is too far when it comes to changing for your boyfriend? Is it the hair, the clothes, the attitude & friends?! I need to know. (link)
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you shouldnt have to change for him! thats soooo ridiculous! first off, dont change your friends, theyre always their for you and this relationship may not work out. i wouldnt change my hair or style b/c thats part of who i am and probably a part of you as well. as far as attitude goes, thats negotiable. like i can understand how guys dont like people who are really clingy or whiney and that may need to be changed. but if it something like, the way you think or respond to things, again thats part of who you are.
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there was this guy that saw my picture on myspace and messaged me for my screename. he would say dirty things to me, and tell me i was sooo sexy and he wanted to hang out with me and that he wanted to see me and all this stuff. he also left this message on my phonee saying how hot i was and stuff. he went to my school but i never really talked to him before this - he just saw my myspace pictures and kept messaging me and IMing me every time i got on. after he kept IMing me for a couple days saying i was sexy and crap, he started saying really gross stuff like he wants to have sex with me and that i could touch his penis and stuff. then he told me he smokes marijuana, which i find really pathetic. why do guys act like this? he hasn't even talked to me in real life, just seen my pictures. what should i do? (link)
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id avoid this guy at all costs! block his myspace, and block his sn, like you said you dont talk to him at school so it shouldnt be too big of a deal, if after you block him he comes up to you and gives you a hard time, then talk to a higher authority (counselor, parent, principal w/e) b/c thats totally not cool! i dont know why some guys act like that, but i do know that i avoid them at all costs, and hang out w/ the sweet guys, b/c people like that, are the ones who you shouldnt get mixed in with.
good luck!
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ok... so im confused... well i've been treated like pure shit when it comes to boyfriends... they all start out amazing but end terribly... i no alot of relationships end badly but this is pretty ridiculous... my last one we were dating for like 5 months... the day he left for vacation he told me he loved me... 9 days later when he got back from mexico he broke up w/ me... he really didnt have a reason... and i havent done anything to make him all of the sudden want to break up.... the only thing he said is he was going into highschool (i already go to the highschool) and it is going to be cross country season (which i thought was a poor excuse becasue i play tennis)... well i know you dont want to read alot.... but seriously i want to talk to some people (ill tell you about myself so maybe you can help me understand y this keeps happening) but basically i really dont understand and im confused becasue i dont know y some guys are like this.. i told myself that they were just stupid and made a mistake... hopfully u can tell me... but before you do i think you need to know about me.... so please respond and ill tell you about me (link)
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some guys are just jerks, and get bored so they make lame excuses and hurt girls
but not all guys are like this so keep your hopes up!
im me at bobodkh1
and maybe i can help you more!
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O.K. i don't want to sound desperate b/c i'm NOT!! i'm "concerned" about my `invisible` love life. i'm 13yrs.old, a female, and going to highschool.
i haven't gotten my 1st kiss, nvr had a b.f., and will prolly be single for the rest of my life.this is kind of weird but, i want to know why boys aren't interested in me? i mean you might not know why but,idk, i NEED som adventure in my life, and i guess i don't need a b.f. but, a 1st kiss wouldn't hurt ,right???
well i dk know if this was a question but, can anyone PLEASE help me!!!!!=(
*ANY 1 who answers this please DON'T say you're pretty on the inside or "one day it'll happen" or any other thing like that!!! i want the REAL DEAL
(don't be to harsh please, just HELPP ME )
thanxxxxxxx a lottta hearts ♥ (link)
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relax! im 15 never had a boyfriend or a first kiss so your not alone! so many girls havent been there and you may feel like your the only one but trust me its perfectly normal! guys are just weird, you may be shy, which could give the impression your stuck up, or that your not interested, you could be really smart and guys could think that you just think theyre stupid, you may even just intimidate guys in general. theres alot of reasons why you may not have a boyfriend but dont sweat it! why try to rush anything? you want your first kiss to be special, not just something you do so you have it out of the way right? i know you said dont say " one day it'll happen" but truth is, one day it will, and you may be surprised to find that it was better all that happened to you when you were older
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Okay so i like this guy but im not sure if he likes me. Hes one of my cousins good friends. He says alot of nice stuff to me like that i have really pretty eyes and that im pretty. On the last day of school it was me him and my cousin [we all walk home] and he acts so different when ben [ my cousin] is around. He`ll be mean to me and like mostly joking around though. He`ll belike you know what DYKE, go play in traffic. And hes like gosh go away. But as soon asmy cousin leave hes all nice and is like yeah your really cool and stuff like that. Its hard to tell if he likes me because he just acts different. And he calls me allot and i call him because were good friends. Most of the time we talk on the phone for like 2 hours. Our max. is 4. I just need advice on in your opinion he likes me at all? (link)
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guys act different around their friends. b.c they dont want their friends to kno who they have a thing for, they think that if their friends think they have a crush, its less manly. it sounds to me like he likes you, when guys take the time to compliment you it usually means theyre interested i think youve got a shot but i would ask him just like "hey why do you treat me so differently when its the 2 of us then you do when my cousin is around" you know, try to get some answers. good luck!
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alright, im gonna attempt to keep this short and simple.
ive liked this kid for about 2 years. i still like him. well. now we never talk. the past 2 summers though, i talked to him all the time [through the school years too] well im going into 9th grade [im 14] and yeah now we NEVER talk. i really really wanna start talking to him again though. i'm not popular, i guess you can say he is, although i hate stereotyping people like that and stuff. i have like no guy friends, although he has a lot of friends that are girls. you see, he used to like me. i started talking to him the summer before 7th grade. he told me he liked me.. blahblahblah. 7th grade started & he asked me out. i said no. why? i'm still not sure and i regret it to this day. we continued to talk after that. i guess it started towards the very end of 7th grade & the summer before 8th that he started to seem less interested in me and we would talk less. oh yeah, we only talked online. occassionally in school, but not every day. ok. i'm really shy. around him, i like got so nervous that i could hardly talk. it sucks because i'm already shy as it is, but around him i was like speechless. i know that after a while, that could change though. yeah so since he seemed less interested & our convos were mainly pointless, one day i just stopped talking to him. i haven't talked to him since september or october [online]. long time right? almost a year. like once or twice, maybe 3 times in school we talked, but it was only if he like asked me for a pencil or something. also a few months ago my friend imed him while at my house. and my brother was talking to him for some reason? [he got on his buddylist somehow] yeah anyway. i want to talk to him again. even if we don't go out, i want to atleast be his friend. because it sucks just liking him, thinking about him all the time and knowing that he's out there with other girls. i mean we have this past. and i can't get it out of my mind. i REALLY REALLY like him. i can't just keep doing this. how can i talk to him again, without it being really awkward? somehow i'm gonna do it. i'm not gonna keep holding back. i'll start off by iming him, and hopefully things will kick off from there. i don't want him to forget about our past. how can i do this? thank you so much, i really appreciate it. sorry it was so long, i tried to keep it simple! :] (link)
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wow havent we all been there? im in that same sorta situation, your taking the right step by saying your gonna im him, so do it! just im him and be like hey long time no talk! ask him whats up, and questions about him, his family, friends etc. in school just be friendlier, im shy too and i know how hard it is to make the first move, even if it is just to build a friendship back up! so give it a shot and if it doesnt work out, atleast you will know that you gave it your best shot! good luck!
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Im 13 yrs old. and still havent got my first kiss =. i feel like eberyone else has & its really bothering me.& i want to get a boyfriend. (link)
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im 15 and ive never had a boyfriend ora first kiss. so dont worry about it! it bothers me too sometimes especially when alot of your friends have boyfriends but sometimes its helpful to see what they do wrong so you wont make the same stupid mistakes when your older. besides, alot of guys are emotionally mature enough when theyre 13 for relationship. the best advice i can give you is dont go looking for a boyfriend, because you may come off as needy. you should make friends w/ alot of guys because that can help if your comfortable around them and can relate, you will come off as dateable because they want someone they can talk to. good luck!
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