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Me and my boyfriend have been together for alomost a year & a half. We are (were) supposed to get married next month. Last night we were talking and he told me something that he had been holding in since last summer that he wanted to get off his chest. I was pregnant last summer and miscarried, he told me he doesnt believe I was ever pregnant. This has hurt me so much, we are not little kids, in fact I am older than him (21 & 23) I would not make up such a horrible story, I was crushed when it happened and still cry at night sometimes when I think about it. He says he cant marry me till he has proof. Getting "proof" isnt a problem, but i feel now as though I cant marry him becuase he doesnt trust me and Ive always been told if you dont have trrust you dont have nothin. I Love him more than I could ever say and the thought of losing him upsets me to no end, but at that same time i feel so betrayed by him like im some kind of monster that would make up a story like that. What should I do? please help Ill rate!!
Sounds like your boyfriend is being over paranoid. Don't worry, this doesn't make him a bad person & he's not losing trust in you. Perhaps the entire experience freaked him out a bit. Judging by the fact you don't understand why he's doing this, it's probably just a bazaar personal notion that he feels he needs proof. Get him the proof just to settle him. Don't doubt his trust in you, just know that he's probably confused by this & hurt as well. Good luck & if you need any more help, just let me know. :D
My bf is best friends with a guy that is just plain creepy. For one thing, he is 38 years old and still lives with his mother. He is also a pedophile, and only goes for very young girls. My bf has even told me that he's a pedophile, so I'm not making it up.
The thing that bothers me is that I've caught his friend staring at me inappropriatly at parties, and he's even winked at me. I had to give his friend a ride home once (because the loser doesnt have a car ) and he told me he liked me for a long time and told me to kiss him. I told him no, and after I dropped him off I told my bf what happened. My bf just laughed and didnt seem to take it seriously. I also heard a story that his friend used to stalk a waitress.
I really don't understand why my bf is still friends with this creep. Sometimes I feel that he'd rather be friends with him than me.
Should I give my bf an ultimateum and say it's either his creepy friend or me? Or would that be too controlling?
As his girlfriend, you have the right to speak up. After all, it's making you uncomfortable & as your boyfriend, he's obligated to your feelings. Decide carefully what you're going to say & explain it calmy & kindly. If you are too harsh with it, he may spin the whole thing around & think you're jealous of his friend. Just tell him that he makes you uncomfortable & that he should talk to him & tell him that you're offlimits & to stop hitting on you. He will understand if you just talk to him. After all, you two are dating & the most important part of dating is communication (& kissing because that's fun too ;D)!
I'm so holy-crap overwhelmed by everything right now! Most of it's from this girl. Don't tell me that teens can't love. I'm 13, and I know what love is. I know I'm in love. But she doesn't like me back. So that's two things so far, love and rejection. Then there's jealousy, when I found out that she had an ex and her first kiss. Her ex is coming back. I know it. I can just feel it. And I have nobody to talk to about it: my parents don't understand (I tried), my friends are as equally nerdy as I am, and don't know a thing about love; I'm way too busy to go see a therapist; I'm too shy to tell her all this.
And of course school. I made all the advanced classes, so that's kinda annoying. But not as much.
And finally, orchestra. I'm in my regular orchestra, a chamber orchestra, an ensemble orchestra, and a jazz orchestra, and I'm also taking private lessons. So that's a holy-crap lot of music to practice.
And now I'm way to overwhelmed to focus on anything. I feel like Charlie Gordon, from Flowers for Algernon. At one point, he described himself as "a blind man allowed to see the light" and that's exactly how I feel. I never knew emotions before. Ever. Now that I know love, rejection, jealousy, etc, I know how to feel. And I've been trying to get over that girl, but I just can't! I can't even remember how I went through my life before I became obsessed with her, before I found Advicenators and started asking and ansering questions, before I knew how to love! I want to be normal again! I want to continue life as I previously had! I can't do anything! I'm just blabbering on and on and on, but there's so much to say! AAUGH!!!!!!!! I'm so pissed off, frusterated, angry, weirded out, overwhelmed, confusticated, and just plain SCREWED UP! Please help! I can't go on with life, I'm losing sleep!
Wow I'm happy I found your question because first of all, I know JUST how to help. This is gonna be lengthy so I appologize in advanced"
-It seems like you really love her. I know people say all this stuff about how when you're 13 you don't know what love is. Well, they're WRONG because I'm 13 & I fell in love so I know EXACTLY how you feel. Love hurts, it's hard, it's horrible & cruel & sometimes all you can do is face it.
-First of all, TAKE A BREATHER. Being overwhelmed is common, especially at our age. It deffinitely is obvious you've GOT ALOT OF STUFF going on & I know how that feels. You've just got to write stuff down, schedual it out. Then.. you have to face her.
-Okay, I know how friendship is one way & then the second you fess up to how you really feel things changed. You've got to tell her that you respect her & HER feelings so you'll be fine JUST being her friend. I know that seems like a lie to yourself & to her but you have to, just to get things back to normal. Then be friends again for a while & see how stuff is.
-I know these feelings are hard. I know they hurt & make you feel like you could just rip your heart out. Heartbreak is horrible & rejection is possibly one of the worst feelings out there.
-Shyness is understandable, I'm not asking you to tell her how you feel. Let me just say that it sounds like you would make an AMAZING boyfriend & if I was her I would deffinitely go out with you because you sound just absolutely SWEET & dedicated to her. Try your best to get things back on track in your life & then work on winning her because ANYTHING iS POSSiBLE WiTH LOVE
well there is this guy that i love...and he told me he loved me the other day and i didnt know what to say back cuz i wasent sure about my feelings but now i am sure that i love him...should i tell him???
Definitely! You are very lucky that he came out & told you first. Now you can be confident that he feels the same way, & it eliminates the insecurity of not knowing. Tell him as SOON as possible though because he probably feels really bad now since you didn't say anything back. Give him a call & good luck sweetie. ♥
I have a best friend... he is so close to me. I go to his house A LOT and juss hang out. we joke around a lot. but im startin to get feelings for him. he is so hularous and very cute. i dont know what to do. i DONT want to like him but i do. and im afraid to tell him. if you could help me that would be great. im really confused. but i think i love him.???its crazy! hELLPPPPP!! thanks ♥
I've been there & I know exactly how you feel. You have 3 choices. One would be to come straight out & tell him how you feel. This would be if you're really confident he'll like you back. Most people don't do this because it takes a really bold girl. I wouldn't do this either. Your second choice is to wait it out for a while, ask other friends to find out how HE feels & try to see if any signs point to him liking you. Then once you feel good enough, you can admit to how you feel. The last choice is to not do anything & just wait for him to ask you out. If he doesn't, just wait for the feeling to pass. I don't reccomend this because it can be painful to wait around & he might feel the same way you do. He might like you but be afraid to admit it. Good luck hon!
♥ Montana
okay heres the downlow. Whenever my boyfriend is around girls he always flirts with them, even if i'm right there. then when i talk to him about he'll either say i never did that or oh i'm sorry i won't do it again, but he never changes! I don't know what i should do. Part of me wants to break up with him and another part of me doesn't! So what should i do!!??
I'm 13,Female
Guys can be like this sometimes & it really sucks. I know you deserve better so you've got to talk to him but be really tough. Tell him this is really hurting you & he can deny it all he wants, it's happening & you want it to stop. You have a right to let him know how you feel & he should in NO way be doing this to you. I know it might be hard but really think about what's best for you. Breaking up with him might be hard at first but if he gets out of hand, it may be the right thing to do. Good luck!!
♥ Montana
ive never made out with a guy im 14
and i dont know how can any one help me like what do i do and how and please no rude comments and answers
thx in advance
Making out is pretty much long, drawn out & passionate kisses. It's pretty much a "go-with-the-flow" thing. Everyone kisses different so the guy you kiss won't be able to tell that it's your first time. Just take it slow & move your mouth in a rythmic motion similar to his. Guys lead when it comes to kissing so just kind of follow. The only way to get good is practice so just take advantage of the time you have with your boyfriend. Good luck!
♥
hey, i'm a fourteen year old and i've never kissed a girl in my life, idk how, and i'm too shy to do it, a lot of people think i'm good looking and i've had a lot of gf's, i've just been too shy to do it, and i don't know how, so, yeah, any tips?
Since you've had alot of gf's, I'm sure you're experienced in the relationship department. The next girlfriend you have, wait for the perfect moment. It might be in a movie, or before you guys leave. For a first kiss, try to make it somewhere private, it'll be less nervewrecking. Go about 90% of the way & then let her come the other 10%. If she doesn't then just shrug it off. Most girls love to show affection that way but if you'd feel more comfortable just ask her if you can kiss her. As far as technique, it's really just a go with the flow thing but if you want, you can google kissing tips. There's plenty of like articles on there that explain like how to tilt your head the right way etc. lol. Good luck!!
♥
I go to a day camp, and there is this really nice boy there. His name is Josh, and I like him alot! I dont know what to say though. Im not sure if like he has ever had a girlfriend before and maybe he wont like me back and will never talk to me again. Please tell me what I should do!
-Britt
Right now, I reccomend just getting to know him as much as possible without revealing your true feelings. Talk to him, befriend him & spend plenty of time with him. Remember, don't be too clingy, just try to get a friendship going then maybe it'll turn into more.
♥ Montana
i know this might sound kind of stupid, but what do you do to get certain guys to notice you? please help!
I've found that the best way to get someone to notice you is to BE noticed. Okay, let me elaborate. Be confident-- this is the number one factor in this situation. If you know you're there, so will others. Know that you're pretty, sweet, kind & a great overall person without being TOO into yourself. Next, dress comfortably but cute. To be noticed, you want to look nice but you want to FEEL nice too. If you're wearing a too-tight top, it may attract guys but the WRONG guys & you won't necessarily feel great about yourself. One last thing, don't be afraid to flaunt what you've got. If you have incredible eyes, make sure you make the most of them. Wear complimenting makeup that will excentuate the feature. Good luck hon!
♥ Montana
i have this boyfirend i have been with for over a year now.. and i love him soo much and i now he feels the same way.. but he live in a totally different state and i want us to be together forever but his parents understand butmine dont im 15 and hes 18.. what should i do to get that acroos to my mom
The BEST way to truely get something across to your parents is to have a one-on-one talk. Yeah, that's right, quality time. Especially when it comes to mother/daughter situations, this is the best way. Ask your mom if she wants to spend some time with you one day when she's off. Maybe go to the mall or to get a bite to eat. Ease into the conversation with small talk & remind her what a good daughter you are. Try to clue her in on what's going on in your life. Then eventually start bringing up your boyfriend. Show her just how mature you are & even remind her how it was to fall in love for the first time. Good luck!
♥ Montana
what are some of the best ways to get a girl to like u as more than a friend? i mean were really good friends already but i want more and im not sure if she does yet 2 but i want to know what r the best things 4 me 2 do not 2 screw things up and gain "points" with her?
15/male
Well, since I'm a girl, I know EXACTLY what guys can do to make us fall for them. Here's a list:
SWEET GESTURES
-Open doors for her. When you're hanging out one on one, treat her like a lady. Girls LOOOVEEEE to feel appreciated & catered to.
-Pay. Not that we're after money but if you pay, it shows that you COULD be interested & it also shows you care about her.
-Nice compliments. This is a toughie because if you over do it, then it may seem like you're trying too hard. Make about one o0r two compliments the whole day you see her. Don't make them obvious like about hair o0r clothes. Make them meaningful like smell o0r smile.
IN CONVERSATION
-Really LISTEN to her. Be very interested what she's saying.
-Look her in the EYES. It may be tempting to look other places but when you look someone directly in the eyes it shows them that they are your main focus.
-Be RESPONSIVE. Don't just let her do all the talking. Particpate in order to make it a "conversation". It makes girls know that you're not one to just sit on the side lines.
RANDOM
-Call her randomly just to talk to her.
-Remind her how much she means to you.
-Spend an overrall alot of time with her ONE on ONE. Even if it's just as friends, it build the relationship.
Good luck & if you need anymore help, feel free to ask!
ok i LOVE this girl but we are really good friends and i dont wanna screw that up but i really wanna go out with her, do you know of anyways that i could use 2 really get her 2 like me or find out if she likes me?
i rate high
Wellllllll, I've gone through this before except I was the girl & I had a crush on my guy friend. Unfortunately, when people develop feelings for one another, there isn't a gaurentee that their friendship with stay strong. However, if the two of you are mature & comitted to stay friends no matter what then you'll be fine.
You have a few options to go about this. Here are some of the BEST ways:
GET A FRIEND TO FIND OUT
This isn't always the most reliable way but it DOES work alot of the time. If you have a close friend that is also close with her, have him/her find out how she feels. That's what I did & it worked out. I found out he felt the same way & now we're dating.
USE THE SIGNS
There are some pretty obvious ways to know if someone likes you. If you 'google' it, you'll be amazed how many sites there are that provide helpful hints about how someone feels about you. They really helped me out with my last crush. If enough of those "signs" apply to her then I would go for it and ask her out.
ASK YOURSELF
This takes the most guts but it has a 99.9% chance of a good answer. Girls like guys with enough guts to ask them themselves. So if you want, take the chance & ask her. Go for it! Then you can go right into asking her out & if she says no then just say "oh okay" & act like nothing's up.
Let's say she likes you...
I've always had trouble deciding whether a certain relationship was worth the friendship. I've finally decided that yes, relationships are & if you both handle it the right way, you won't have to risk a bad friendship.
Let's say she doesn't...
Just be nonchalant about it & act like it's no big deal. Unless you want to fess up to having feelings, you don't have to tell her. It may be hard to get over the thought that she doesn't return the emotions but it will be fine after a while.
Good luck! ♥
How can I get a guy to like me?
Getting a guy to like you is complicated but can be very simple if you follow all the basic procedures. Let's start!
1. Be CONFIDENT- Over the years I've realized that guys preffer confident girls. I suppose there is just something about them & how they have no fear. Girls who aren't that self assured have trouble being comfortable about someone they like so the guy who they are trying to date never really gets to see the real them. Just pretend he's any ordinary person when you're around him because in all actuality, he is.
2. Be FLIRTY- Guys, just like girls, are afraid of rejection too. If you are flirty & drop hints then they will feel more comfortable about making the first move. Look them straight in the eye, laugh at their jokes & always smile like you know something that they don't.
3. Be AGRESIVE (but not TOO agressive)- What I mean by that is, don't be afraid to hang out with a guy or suggest you go someplace as friends. Call him or ask for his screename! This is being agressive & getting to know him before another girl gets a chance. However, don't be too agressive & clingy because that can really get annoying. Know when to give him space.
Now that you know the 3 basic ways to ask, let's cover what NOT to do & what things will result in him trying to get AWAY from you instead of TOGETHER.
1. DON'T Play Hard-2-Get- Girls have a tendency to have feelings but not share them at all. They want to be a 'tease' & not give a guy what he wants. That's is NOT the way to get into a relationship, truuuust me on this one. The best thing to do is confront your feelings, not pretend that they are non existent.
2. DON'T Be Annoying- I stated this above how important it is that you aren't clingy & annoying. Don't call, IM or attempt to talk to this guy every second. It's can get stalkerish & freak him out a bit. Just give him some space & talk when YOU think the time is right.
3. DON'T Be Nervous- Guys can really sense when you're nervous around them, it's obvious. They'll start to feel uncomfortable too if us girls start blushing & stuttering. Just be yourself & don't feel worried or self concious.
Good luck! ♥
ok there isthis girl i like and she thinks shes to good for me and i want to proove her wrong and show her that im not a mistake wat do i do
For a while, I was the girl that thought I was too good for one guy. How he proved it to me was we talked to eachother online & I started to realize how sweet he was. Try talking to her or finding out her screename. Show her that you're not a mistake. Don't overdo the compliments however because she'll find it fake. Just be yourself =] Good luck! ♥
How can I tell if a guy likes me?
Here's a chart that I made up for another question that was asked, similar to yours. I will also link this question in the 'FAQ'.
Directions: copy & paste this into a word processor (like MicrosoftWord or WordPerfect) & put some sort of mark in the middle of the [ ]'s if it applies to the boy that likes you. Then add them up & see what your total is. After that, follow the steps underneath your total to see some results :]
[ ] You often find him staring at you
[ ] He goes out of his way to talk to you
[ ] He'll smile at you
[ ] His friends are starting to take notice of you
[ ] His behavior is different around you then others
[ ] He doesn't pull away if you touch him, whether it be an accident or not
[ ] He blushes when you give him a compliment
[ ] When he talks to you, he looks directly into your eyes
[ ] He tends to show off in front of you
[ ] When he's talking to his friends, he glances over at you
(0-1 Checks) Just Friends
He's showing limited signs & maybe some not on the list. He's definitely interested in you, but only for friendship. However, that COULD change so try to spend more time with him!
(2-5 Checks) It's Possible
He might not necessarily 100% like you but he might be starting to develope feelings so all the signs aren't quite there yet. If you don't want to wait & want to hurry up the pace, start talking to him or compliment him & see what he does.
(6-10) Somebody's Got A Crush
He likes you & it's very obvious. If you want to pursue things a bit more, why not ask him to hang out or get his screename. Talk to him as much as you can & if you return the feelings, I'm sure dating might be in the atmosphere!
I am 13 and a girl who has never had a boyfriend and I think think this is my chance.There is this boy who has gone to mostly every school I have gone to(were in the same grade).But I think he likes me.Its like he has been drooping clues like he stares at me all the time with this serious look on his face,he saved me one time(if thats what you wanna call it)because I was walking and I wasn`t waching where I was going so I was about to bump into the wall then he said somthing to me then that made me look up,and his friend heeps on looking at me.So how do I figure out if he likes me without talking to him and can you give me information on how to tell if a boy likes you.
By the sound of it, he might. I made a handy chart so you can add up the signs & see if he does. Also, if you ever end up liking him, I put some advice in there that might help get a relationship going. Good luck sweetie! ♥
Directions: copy & paste this into a word processor (like MicrosoftWord or WordPerfect) & put some sort of mark in the middle of the [ ]'s if it applies to the boy that likes you. Then add them up & see what your total is. After that, follow the steps underneath your total to see some results :]
[ ] You often find him staring at you
[ ] He goes out of his way to talk to you
[ ] He'll smile at you
[ ] His friends are starting to take notice of you
[ ] His behavior is different around you then others
[ ] He doesn't pull away if you touch him, whether it be an accident or not
[ ] He blushes when you give him a compliment
[ ] When he talks to you, he looks directly into your eyes
[ ] He tends to show off in front of you
[ ] When he's talking to his friends, he glances over at you
(0-1 Checks) Just Friends
He's showing limited signs & maybe some not on the list. He's definitely interested in you, but only for friendship. However, that COULD change so try to spend more time with him!
(2-5 Checks) It's Possible
He might not necessarily 100% like you but he might be starting to develope feelings so all the signs aren't quite there yet. If you don't want to wait & want to hurry up the pace, start talking to him or compliment him & see what he does.
(6-10) Somebody's Got A Crush
He likes you & it's very obvious. If you want to pursue things a bit more, why not ask him to hang out or get his screename. Talk to him as much as you can & if you return the feelings, I'm sure dating might be in the atmosphere!
would you date someone older than you?
I would, but it really depends on the age difference. I wouldn't date someone more than 1 year older than me because I'm in 8th grade & that would make them in 10th grade so that would be a big gap in my eyes. However, Lots of other girls would date someone older, I'm just not that way.
alright my prob is that since i'm not a jock and not a skater or anything like that girls at my school hate me wat should i do
and how can i get them to like me w/o changing my image
The BEST way to get a girl's attention is to be flirty & confident but not TOO much. A guy who tries to MAKE every girl feel "special" is not liked because then we aren't sure that he is loyal. Pick one girl, that's the bes way. Then other girls will see that you're giving HER attention & they'll want it too. You don't have to be too obvious about it, just sweet & help her out sometime. & if you don't mind me asking, if you're not jock or skater, what are you? Because there are many other appealing "images" so maybe I can tell you how to work with who you are. Just drop me one in my inbox if you would like. Good luck! =]
Hey! I like this guy but I don't know how to go up to him and start talking see the problm is he barly knows I exist plz help.
I was in the EXACT same situation a while ago. I desperately wanted to get to know this guy but I didn't know what to do. My advice is to be around him & talk to your friends, flirt & catch his attention. You don't necessarily have to go UP to him & start chatting because I wouldn't do that either. Just start laughing it up with a few of your buds & have him look over. Then give him a quick smile & he'll have you in his mind for the rest of the day. Then by the end of the day, or the start of the next, he'll come up and talk to you. However, for this to work you have to get that smile in there. Good luck hon! =]