I am in a very serious commitment with my fiance. I have been through a lot of love problems and learned from my expeirence. If you need love life help or anything dealing with relationships, i'm your guy.
Gender: Male
Location: Terre Haute Indiana
Occupation: chef
Age: 19
Member Since: October 28, 2009
Answers: 32
Last Update: October 6, 2010
Visitors: 4311
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Hey, so you said if we had a realtionship question you were our guy. Well hey... haha uhm so I'm fifteen female and I'm a sophomore. About five months ago me and my boyfriend (16/m junior) of seven months broke up. While we were dating he pressured me into letting him finger me, almost physically forced me to give him a handjob and guilted me into giving him a blowjob four days before he dumped me in a text message... I guess I was pretty messed up at the time. He had me super whipped, and that's not all his fault. After the split we were still on pretty bad terms. We still talked and fought and yelled at eachother and couldn't seem to straighten it all out... He also told me that he was only in the relationship for the last three months for the physical parts... Then he decided to tell everyone he could about how far we went. He also made up a rumor that we had sex saying gross stuff like "when I was on top I thought I was gonna break her cause she's so tiny. It was great though, she let me do whatever I wanted, I coulda stuck it up the ass if I'd wanted to". And all of that stuff just really hurt... In my delusional state I really did care about him and I obviously trusted him... Yeah it was a bad idea but I did. And to have that trust just thrown back in your face and stabbed in the back... It was a horrible time for me. Not only boyfriend stuff, my parents were separeted during the time (they're back togehter now though). Anyway, about two months after the break up he tried to apologize for everything. But I didn't think he should just be able to be a dick for two months and think everything will be fien just cause he shot me one semi sincere text message... So I called him a week later and we had areally long really good chat and he said he really wanted to be friends but I still wasn't sure so I told him I'd think about it. We didn't talk for awhile and I was kind of still getting over things. But one night we were hanging out in a big group (it was in the middle of the me thinking and figuring out era) and he was ignoring me all night even though I was TRYING to be friendly and stuff. So I kind of yelled at him :\ which I know I shouldn't have done. He was mad. We haven't been good since then... I tried to apologize and tell him I still wanted to be friends but he wants nohting to do with me. I messed up once!! He fucked up our entire relationship and basically ruined my life and I yell at him once and suddenly I'm the most annoying creature that's walked the earth... It's stupid. I want to be friends because I know that until we are on good terms, I'm not gonna get over what happned. I have to forgive AND forget to finally move on... And I want to move on. A lot. He's good friends with my best friend too which also adds some motivation for me to settle things I jsut don't know where to go from here... I've told him everyithing I've wanted to tell him, the balls in his court but I don't think he's gonna do anything with it... for some reason I only get one mess up card and it's just not fair... I like someone else now and I've moved on in a sense that I don't liek him anymore but I'm so tired of harboring all of these negative feelings for my ex... And I know if I try to talk to him about it more than I already have it'll just annoy him more... So what are some ACTIONS I can take to show him we can work as friends?? (link)
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Wow. First off, I'm sorry you got stuck with "that kinda guy." It seems to me, at first when you broke up, he still wanted something to do with you, but now I think that the relationship part is done and over with. Also, I think this guy gets off on control. There is nothing worse than being with a control freak. They yell and scream and want you to live your life as a hermit. As far as actions you can take to show him you can work as friends, maybe you have a friend's birthday coming up and you could ask him if he would like anything to do with it. Or if you and some friends are hanging out, you could invite him along. Be sure to not do too many things to smother him, or lead this guy on. What i would do, is just take it easy for a few days, see if he says anything. You said the ball was in his court, maybe he is just playing with it at the moment. I'm not saying that i know how things will turn out, but if you give him the space he is bluntly asking for, and then invite him along on small little hang outs then the outcome is more than likely going to be more positive than if you don't do anything. Good luck sweetie, if you want, message me and we can talk about it.
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OK so i was dating this guy for a year and we broke up because he found out i ALMOST cheated on him. yea it was stupid but i say im over him i truly didnt love him tho i thought i did and now he talks shit about me to his friends and the only he dated me is because he wanted to have sex but he was 13 and im 15 so that wasnt gunna happen. but i dont know like if im over him if i should go back to him if i should hate him i just dont know and like im dating my ex from two years ago again and i think its a big mistake. so what should i do? advice please!!!!! 15f 9th grade
-mina (link)
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sweetie, you are 15 years old. You didn't love him. Finish high school then worry about a relationship. If you want to be able to have a successful future, then you need an education. If you want to be able to get nice things and be happy then get over this kid and get your education
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I like a guy at school, how do i get him hot, turn him on? stuff like that?
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I could have a lot of fun with this question, but you didn't list your age. Assuming you are young, ill just give you a few pointers. First off, get close to him. Whisper little things in his ear. If you find alone time, put your hand on his thighs and stroke them. eventually, work your way to the penis. just slide your hand over it a few times. He will want you more than a fa t person wants cake
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16/f
I don't know what's wrong with me.Lately I feel alone all the time.I don't have a lot of friends,but the ones I have are a gift from God and they are always there to help me and hear me out.But it seems it doesn't matter,I still feel alone.I don't have a boyfriend right now,which really bothers me...and I know it shouldn't...but since I'm single I feel unattractive,invisible,as if I'm boring...I also know it's stupid that I only feel beautiful when I have a boyfriend,even though people tell me I am and I don't need a bf to prove me that.I feel as if no one is ever going to notice me and I'm gonna end up single for the rest of my life.This makes me sound shallow,I am aware of it.But that's just the way it is and the way I feel... (link)
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I understand. it's hard being a teenager. I personally don't have a lot of friends, and the one i do have happens to be my fiance. Be thankful that you have friends to talk to and that will listen, its a gift that most people take forgrannit. It shouldn't matter if you are beautiful. everyone has something beautiful about them. IF you get a boyfriend because he thinks your beautiful, then you won't know whether or not he likes you for you. I'm not saying that beauty is a bourden, but when you are beautiful, people tend to be around you for just that reason. your 16 sweetie. Your not going to find that guy who is perfect for you. Love will find you when the time is right. I know that sounds like a bunch of bull, but i had the same thought process when i was your age, and i turned 19 and found the woman that i have always been searching for. It will find you.
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I really like thhis guy he's sooo cute and i just wanna have sex with him soo bad .but im scared bcuz i told ive lost it already but i have nott and hes gonna know bcuz i donnt think ive popped my cherrry yet and since i havent had sex yett i donnt know how im going to react to it and i really dont wanna embarres myself .Whatt do i dddo? (link)
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look, you are still young. How old is this man? Why do you think that having sex is so important? I'm a guy and i dont find it that important. Yes, i enjoy it, but only with the woman that i love. I saved myself for that woman and when it happened it wwas amazing. If you are a virgin, then my advice to you is to keep you pants up and focus on scool. I know that people are always saying that but school is more important that having a child. Childrenn are nice, when you are prepared for them. If you are unprepared then it's going to be a bourden and you will flunk out of school and have officially no life.
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Hi I have been lost on what to do about how my girlfriend of 1 yr and 7 months doesn't approve of what my goals and dreams for my life are. I am a junior in college about to be 21 and I play golf and want to be a head golf professional at a golf course or even try to make it on tour but my girlfriend trys to tell me how i need to come up with a new dream and goal because she thinks I will never be home. I have played golf and had these dreams ever since I could walk. I am in love with her and don't want to lose her. She also trys to say that if I keep playing golf she will break up with me and it so happens that she does this the night or couple days before i have a tournament which i then can't play to my full potentional. What is the best thing to do? (link)
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first off, DON'T CHANGE ANY LIFE PLANS TO BE WITH SOMEONE!! (srry bout the caps) If she can't fully support you, then in my opinion she doesn't really love you. Love to me is where you care enough about someone, you would leave them if that made them happier you would support their goals and dreams. Now, i personally find golf a silly sport. But it's your goal. Don't change who you are or who you want to be because of some girl. I know you love her. I know you care. I have been with mine for a year and 6 months and not once has she or I shot down each others dreams. She wants to be a vet. I think that's silly and going to be very hard, but i tell her that i believe in her and that she can do anything she puts her mind to. Talk to her. Tell her that if she can't support you that she will have to find someone willing to put up with the constant shooting down of plans and dreams. Good luck to ya
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So I've been dating this guy (I'm 27 he's 30) since the June and he's moving pretty fast, even says I love you. He basically told me that it was over if I didn't want to commit to him but the reason I don't want to commit was because I'm moving in Jan and don't want to go through a break-up. He's not okay with it not being official so the other day I made it official. (He's even told me I need counseling bc I have trust issues.) He was in Vegas this weekend and we texted but when I called he didn't pick up or call me back. I feel like he's been acting strange and I asked him if it was over. He said I was nuts because we just became a couple and I told him how he hasn't even called me back. He said I was annoying him with all this drama and that I was going to push him away if I continued this. Drama? I was shocked. He's basically forced me into this relationship and now I'm drama and clingy. What do I do? (link)
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I think you need to ask yourself if you even want to be in this committment. If you really do care for this guy. I'm only 19 and i'm sure that i have a lot to learn in my life but if someone constantly controlls you and begs you to cling to him but turns around and says your being too clingy, then i think you have the wrong person. Look into the future, say 6 months. This kind of behavior only escelades. Now, don't get me wrong, there are people out there who do this and change, but it's rare. If you want to be with this guy(but by the sounds of it you don't) then talk to him and tell him how you feel. Ask how you are being too dramatized and clingy. Tell him if he don't like it to hit the road because men aren't worth changing for...sad thing is, i'm a man. To be in a relationship, you shouldn't have to change who you are, or what you do or even have to lose friends. Unfortunately I was that guy who controlled and all that. I changed, that's why i said it could happen. Don't change for anyone but yourself. If you understand his points, and want to change them, then do it but i highly recommend that you get out of this relationship. Wait till you leave in January, and wherever your going i'm sure there is someone waiting. Sweetie, you can fix this. you just have to be willing too.
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so then if you smother the person? they most likely wont want you?
im sorry. (link)
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That depends on the person. I personally like the attention and like having her always by my side. Some guys though, they don't particularly like it.
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20f. joe -18, almost 19
this might be long but i know this will bug me so i need an outsiders perspective and i will return the favor!
so I've been friends with joe for about 5 years now, we call each other best friend. we use to be really close but we started fading within the last yr, i've always had feelings for him and i still hate texting him first, etc. he graduated high school and moved 4hrs away to go play hockey beginning of sept. since he is really good. i haven't seen him since end of july. i said i wanted to do a road trip and go watch him play sometime this yr. we weren't friends on facebook and he adds me two nights ago. i accept him and write: joseph how were we not friends on here? i hope everything\'s going good ..i miss you!! text me, i'll let ya now when we're thinking about coming to see ya. he texted me tonight, this was our convo:
him: whats going on
me: joseph i miss you! how are things going, tell me everything.
him: there going pretty good. its a lot of work but not bad
me: i'm sure your getting into good shape. have you had any pre-season games, how do you think you guys are gonna do this yr?
him: yea we had five. we should be pretty good
me: how are your teammates, do you have any hot ones for your best friend
him: Haha i don't know you would have to see that. but there nice.
me: i love how much help you always are! can you just come home i don't want you there anymore (trying to be cute about it ha)
him: how come? haha
me: because i can't even remember the last time i saw you ..don't you think that's kinda sad? then you just leave me!
him: yea i wish i could come home too
me: well me tara (my friend) and nate (my cousin, his friend also) wanna come in november when you guys play omaha so i'm thinking that's when. unless you wanna quit and come home i mean that would be ok too ;)
him: i can't quit haha that would be fine if you came then. its a ways from now tho haha
me: haha i know i wouldn't want you to quit but it is far away. you will just be more happy to see me though won't you don't even lie
him: yep i would
me: hey don't sound so excited. i don't wanna come anymore i'll just send tara and nate.
he never responded after that. i was obviously joking about my last comment. he knows how i'm sarcastic but after i sent that and he never responded i was like crap i shouldn't of said that. what should i do? just not text him and wait awhile? wait for him to text me? do you think he got mad i said that or what? if i texted him tomorrow like i was kidding about not coming he would probably just be like "i know" and make me look dumb. i'm worried now!! and i'm so lucky to be close with him, all the girls want him they act like he's a superstar and i feel special he actually texts me when i want him to. all these girls write on his facebook and he never responds but always does to me ..but seriously he's the most down to earth guy you could ever meet. i tell him everything because he's the only guy i trust. we talked about having sex next time we saw each other before he left (5 yrs of knowing him .. i insisted we had sex ..i cant resist him any longer) ..and i was like well be ready then next time i see you ;) don't comment about us having sex, but if he doesn't come home and the next time i see him is when i go there in november i'd be up to doing it then ;) how can i kind of bring this up to him to get him excited and remind him about it? or do i not and just see what happens when we get there? i wanna see how he feels about it though. i was thinking about saying "because i haven't seen you in so long and because i want you ;)" something like that when he asked why i wanted him to come home. i actually think he was thinking i'd say something like that. i don't like to blunt like "so would you be up to having sex when i came there?" i like to be more flirty and get the point across like that.
ugh i don't know! any suggestions???! (link)
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Wow, that was a lot of reading.Sweetie, I think that you love this guy. My advice to you is to not be serious about talkin to him about sex. Just joke around about it and if you end up spending any alone time with him, make the first move. I have no idea what he could've meant about it's a ways from now tho..maybe he was talking about the end of the season? Or just joking about how far away he is? I truly have no idea. As far as the sex goes, I find no problem in you wanting to have sex with him. You are an adult and you can make your own decisions. Just be careful.
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alright, well im 19/f, will be 20 next week, and he is 21.
a bit of background info - we met last summer in panama city beach while i was in town with my family. he lives about an hour and a half from there, and drove down every night after we met to see me and hang out. we liked each other, stayed in touch for a bit after my vacation ended, but then stopped talking. i was fixin to start college here in Georgia, and he was working, and we just lost touch.
fast forward to this year. i went back to panama city with my family just like last year, and a few weeks before i had texted him out of the blue saying i'd be back down and that he should come see me. sure enough, just like last year he drove down almost daily for the whole week to hang out with me and it was just like last year. we'd hang out all night, hold hands, kiss, and started to like each other all over again.
well this time, we've stayed in touch, talking & texting all day and night since the end of july, our feelings have gotten so much stronger, and we've been officially together for a few days shy of a month. he's made the 4 hour drive to see me and stay with me at my apartment at school a fe times, and i've driven down to florida to stay with him and his family. he's SO sweet to me, always telling me how he doesn't wanna lose me, how much i mean to him and how i'm the best thing thats ever happened to him and he's so happy he has me now.
welllll, he told me he loves me a couple weeks ago. i wasn't expecting it so soon, and i haven't said it back, but i think i do love him. i'm happier than i've been in a long time, and i want to tell him but part of me is scared because of the short time we've been together and i dont want to be hurt like i have been before.
the only other guy i've loved was a guy that i dated for 3-3.5 years when i was 15, which we also said i love you really early, but that was my first love.
i just dont know if its too soon? i feel like time-wise, it is. but i feel like i do love him, and we're pretty serious about each other. he's seriously considering moving out of florida and finding a job in the town where i go to school. i'm thinking about telling him next week when he comes back to stay with me, but ahh i'm kinda nervous :) does it seem like its too soon? (link)
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look sweetie, if it is love you will KNOW it. it won't be a "i think" issue. I know i love my girl and we were togther a month before i said it to her. If you know you love him, then don't hold back your feelings for him. If you think that you love him then give it a while and think about it. Love is a very strong word.
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So, ironically enough, that guy (ex boyfriend) ended up getting a hold of me after I had apologized and said I wanted a fresh new start. But he’s the one that blew it this time pretty much. The first thing he texts me is “How much gas money do you have?” Am I just being “high maintenance” or am I justified in being offended about that? I mean, after a heartfelt apology he comes back with that??? If he really wanted to see me couldn’t he have found some way to get his own gas money?
So I didn’t see him. Instead, I had met this other guy at an Army recruiting office like three days ago and I went to go hang out with him. We both needed to take our ASVAB and we were scheduled at the same time, so we were in the car talking and he said “How about whoever scores higher has to take the other person out to lunch” and I agreed, I thought that was kinda cute to be honest. And I kept thinking about how weird it was that I was so upset about what’s-his-name and then all of a sudden out of nowhere here comes my prince charming to save the day. Everything was perfect. HE paid for the meal, that’s never happened to me before, I’ve never been on a date. We were at the restaurant for like 3 and a half hours just talking. We had a lot in common and I really enjoyed it. He then invited me out to a sports bar by our side of town to watch the Bears and the Packers play. After that he kissed me goodnight, and we’ve been talking ever since. I thought wow, it’s about time something good happened to me lately. And then last night we had decided to hang out again, but it ended so badly. He sprung on me that he was in love with this girl, who I had met at the sports bar the night prior, and that things between him and I “Shouldn’t happen”. I was devastated. It really hurt. He was mature about it, but it didn’t really cushion the blow as much as you would think it should have.
So now I’m stuck. The ex boyfriend texted me again this morning asking if I was doing anything today. I don’t know what to say. I would like to say yes, but then I don’t. I got all excited to move on, and now I can’t even do that. Should I move on, or try with this guy again? It’s like this ongoing battle between my brain and my heart. I don’t quite know what to make of it.
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okay your in a pickle. Some guys are bold and arrogant where as some are sweet and charming. I fell into the bold and arrogant trap before about a month ago. Some guys need another chance, but then some blow it in the first ten minutes. Him asking for gas money would send up a red flag for me, but i wouldn't call it game over. Do you care for this guy? Do you love him? Think about all the times you have had together and think about all the good and the bad that has happened in your guys' relationship. Does the good out way the bad? Does he say that he is willing to improve his personality and do what he needs to to be a better persons? If he is willing to give it a shot then i would say to just try it. Tell him that he has a month to prove to you that he wants to be a better person and if he blows it, your done for good. That's what my girl did for me and i garuntee if she hadn't have left me in the first place, i still wouldn't be pleasent to be around. If you can, give the man a chance. If you feel that you can't, then try to move on. Don't move on to another guy, but try being single and living a stress free life for a while then if you meet someone go for it. Good luck sweetie, hope it works out for you.
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Husband wants me to get a 3some together me him and another girl. we've been married 4 months. I have experianced this before and have kissed girls when really drunk. He knows I like to look at girls and love to watch porn with him. I dont know if this makes me bi or just loves the woman body. I kinda do want that 3some he askes for but in a way dont want to share our bedroom love life with someone else. Is this a normal thing a guy wants or do you think he is not happy with JUST me and my body. I am 29 180lbs and 5'7 he is 6'2 272 and 36 yrs old. (link)
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I agree with peeps. If your not comfortable with something like this then don't do it. I joke around with my girl about have a 3some but i know how she feels about sharing and i know how i feel about sharing. I'm totally okay with using our imagination and trying to come up with new things to do. If your husband is going to get all angry with you about not wanting to do it then are you sure you found the right guy? Just a question, no one knows how you feel but you. It's normal for men of all ages to want to do more freaky and kinky things in the magic room, but also, some guys can't stand to be told no. It's okay if your not comfortable with it. Just tellk him how you feel and go from there. Good luck to ya, hope everything works out in your favor.
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its just my heart still is telling me not to give up. i mean yes he doesnt seem insterested so is that my key to just move on.
and okay but lets say, what if you broke up with her and she said that to you? would that be weird or desperate?
jw
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Follow your heart. If you think you love him then that is a totally different story then liking him. If you do love him my dear, don't smother him just tell him how you feel and if he don't feel the same way then there is nothing to do but move on. That's all i can think of sweetie
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if i may ask.
how did you end up getting her back? (link)
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I told her to think about the times we had together and if she wanted to be apart, then fine. But she meant everything to me and i asked for one last shot. Took her some time but she thought about it and took me back.
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so about four months ago my ex broke up with me and recently i found out that its over for good.
i want to move on with my life. i know ill never be able to forget what happened but i dated the kid for eight months and he was there through an important time in my life.
so i was just wondering, what are some ways that i can move on?
what sucks is that i didnt get any closure. he broke up with me over the phone and that sucks cause its not like i could totally give my goodbye. (link)
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First off, nothing is going to make it better unless you are ready for things to be better. Some people give you the fish in the sea crap but someone that is truly in love aren't interested in the other fish. It seems to me like you really loved him. Talk to people. My girl...god bless her heart..Left me right before our anniversary. I was torn up for a week. I talked to all my family and tried to figure out what i could do to convince her to take me back. after a week she did but in that week i had feelings that i didn't even know that i had. If you are ready for things to get better than do activities to get your mind off of it. Find a group of friends to hang out with. Do anything. Then, time will heal your wounds. Hope this helps.
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To sum it up my whole high school career I experienced love. My first love and then the one who stole it.I was with both guys for roughly a year and a half each. The 2nd guy and I ended a little over a year ago and that was still the last time I had real feelings for someone. I've never experienced such a harsh and hurtful breakup as I did with him, not even when I had to break the heart of my very first love. Now this 2nd guy still crosses my mind especially on my lonely days. He hasn't spoken to me since we broke up a year ago. Sometimes I get scared that I won't be able to find someone to fill this hole. I'm 19 and finally living the single life which I haven't really gotten to experience growing up. There has been hopefuls, people who start falling for me, but I just can't. I can't find the right person to fall for. Recently I've been more into checking girls out rather than guys and its making me so confused. I think I've just been feeling so alone this past year and getting so sick of these boys that I want to be open minded over who I fall in love with. I've been feeling more spark in me over girls then I do in boys. I don't know whats going on with me. (link)
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Well if you find that you can be happier with women, then I recommend being a lesbian or bisexual. I cannot say that I feel your pain but, I'm sure that you will find someone soon. Keep your head up and don't lower your standards too low. I made that mistake and now i'm stuck in it. Seriously, just enjoy the single life and when someone comes along, snatch them up and never let go.
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17/f
so, in my one class, there is this one boy, who is really good looking, and he seems like the type of boy that i would have a lot of similar interests with. (music, art.) anyway, i told the two girls i sit next to and talk to frequently in there how i thought he was hot, and so the one girl acted very.. middle schoolish.. & went and called this other girl skylar over, and she was like oh skylar! kendall thinks chris is hot! and they were like SHOUTING this conversation, and so, skylar had chris come over and hand me a paper, and i was so embarrassed, because i thought he heard. well she ended up telling him that i liked him or whatever, and the next day skylar was by my table, and she says loudly.."oh guess who is coming to give you your paper!" & i was like ughhh. & usually he just puts the piece of paper on my desk, and continues, but this time, he held it out, and i had to turn to face him and grabbed it & me being shy i just smiled, and so then he hit his head on the cabinet and me and the girl that sits next to me started laughing, so he stood at the end of the table, and was like "so does anyone else need paper?" (we all needed paper, he knew it too, because we were going to have to draw him, & it was the paper we were using.) & so the one girl was like "Yes? don't we all need it?" & he was like "oh yeah." & he stood there for another second, and then walked away.
it was really awkward, and i'm not sure what to make of it. in your opinion of what i told you, do you think he may be interested? a lot of my friends think he is, but i don't know. & if he is, what do i say next (keep in mind i'm really shy.) & if you don't think he is & probably finds me repulsive.. what do i do? just ignore him? (link)
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This kind of sounds like a romance movie. I think that he really likes you and if you don't persue his interests then he might think that he is trying for nothing. In my opinion, you should get his phone number and talk to him. Let him know your interests and let him share his. After a while, if you feel a connection, go for it. If not then you can still be really close friends. Be sure not to do what I did. I tried to look on the internet on things to get a woman interested, and how to make a girl interested in you and it all back fired. I hope that you can be happier with him then I was with my girlfriend...
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