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My name is Laura and I'm 28 years old. I live in Illinois and work as a licensed veterinary technician. I am a runner, bookworm and obviously, an animal lover.I've been on this site since '05. I take hiatuses, but I'm never gone for good. I enjoy giving advice and I've made such lovely friends on this site that I couldn't imagine giving it up!
chat it up yo.
ps. here's my bestestestest friend.
I love him. You will too :)
advice
18/f. Hey everyone.
A few months ago "one of my supposedly best friends" and my other "really good friends" all started these nasty rumors about me and were calling me names such as; slut, whore, skank, waste of time, waste of breath, never important, etc. I mean I was getting restricted phone calls, instant messages, text messages, messages on facebook/myspace from all these different people. I was getting verbally harassed for about 2 weeks. I'm not getting into the rumors because thats besides the point and they weren't true no matter how many times I told them, they didn't believe me. I do nothing to them, I ignore them. I don't spread rumors about them. I want NOTHING to do with them anymore. They are totally out of my life, for good.
Anyways, my current best friend (whom I have been friends with since 1st grade) stuck up for me and was telling the girls that it wasn't true. (Like a best friend should do.) But she still talks to those girls and she still hangs out with them. I can't tell her who she can and can not talk to because thats not fair to her. You know? But she says she doesn't like to hang out with them because they are immature and full of drama. Yet, last weekend she went to a party with them. There was drinking involved and you never know what was said at that party about me. Because even though it's been around 8 months, the girls still talk about me and how the rumors are true. I hear about it every so often. And you never know what was being said about me because alcohol brings out truth and whatnot, you know? You don't know who said what or what was said, etc.
Anyway, now my current best friend is leaving these girls comments on their facebooks saying how they all need to hang out again, it was so much fun, etc. She knows I can't stand these girls for what they did to me and yet she still talks to them. It hurts my feelings how she does still hang out with them. I wouldn't do that to her, even if they did nothing to me, that's just how I am. If someone messes with my friend, they have to deal with me. I tried telling her that it hurts my feelings that she still hangs out with them and talks to them, but she doesn't do anything about it. I don't know what else to do.
I don't even know what question I'm asking you guys, that's how confused I am. Haha. I guess basically, what I am asking is for some advice about what to do with my current best friend. How to handle this situation in a mature, adult manner.
Sit her down and talk to her. Don't yell at her or force her to choose, but let her know it bothers you that she hangs out with those girls.
Explain to her what you told us, that it hurts your feelings that she still hangs out with them. Honestly, I think if she was a real friend she'd stop or at least take it down a notch.
But talking to her really is the best thing you can do; letting her know how you feel. These girls don't even sound like they're worth her time, anyways.
If you need anymore help, send me an inbox message.
-Laura (17-f)
(Rating: 5) thank you.