askDangerWench
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Q: i'm a male, over 20, alone as hell.
i've never been able to get a girlfriend, i've tried and tried.
it seems like some crule cycle with me, meet a girl, ask her out a couple of times, start to like her and suspect she likes me too, try to be there for her and everything, try to move things up a notch, get the "you're such a good/nice/fabulous guy, i just wanna be friends" routine. Then i'll let go of how i feel as much as posible and try being "just friends", then she picks up the biggest jerk known to mankind and i get to sit across the table watching them make out (TORTURE, for those who care). then the arshole will proceed to cheat on her, she's crushed, i have to listen to all the bullshit and cheer her up, only to find her back with the butthead a week later, then a month later he'll cheat on her AGAIN...
by the third time this happens i simply fuck off, cause she's still won't go out with me and she keeps on going back to the total jerk and every month i have to be there for her.
WHAT THE FUCK, girls always tell me what a "NICE GUY" i am and the friendship crap, but why won't they go out with me.
I'm starting to accept that i'll die alone and bitter, and am starting to avoid woman totally.
I just don't know what to do, i'm really starting to lose it with woman.
I'm over 20 and i haven't even kissed a girl yet. WTF?!!!!!!!!!!!!
should i just kill myself now instead of becoming a full blown alcoholic?
should i try to like guy's more, and simply go gay?
at least i get alot of attention from gay guys trying to chat me up at bars, though im not gay. but women.......FUCK
i need advice please.
I know it sounds corny, but try an internet personals site. My husband and I met on one, and we have been married for nearly 9 years now. We were 26 at the time.

If you do place an ad, be honest about what you are looking for in a girl. If you want her to have certain moral values, say so. If you want her to be smarter than average, say so. Sure, you'll get fewer responses if you are brutally honest, but the responses you do get will be targeted and won't be as likely to waste your time.

Let your REAL personality show through in your ad. If you put on a fake persona, you'll both end up disappointed, as nobody can keep up a fake persona for long... It's not fair for either of you.

I think hubby had maybe 2 people answer his ad and it was up for over a year. (of course that was 9 years ago and the internet wasn't quite as well trafficked as it is now!) I was one of those people who answered his ad, and the other was a feminist railing on him because he expected too much of a woman (his ad said he wanted a Christian virgin with a high IQ, who understood that diamonds are a scam, etc...) But here we are, married nearly 9 years later.

Ok, change of subject:

The kind of girl you are attracted to can sometimes make it harder to find a good one. For instance, "hot" babes have a much higher percentage of being flakes, gold-diggers, selfish, and shallow. (not all of them, of course, but the good ones are usually long taken) I've seen some guys who have complained about not being able to find a nice, loyal girl... But in the same breath would be like "Oh, I wouldn't date HER, she's fat!" So sometimes shallow begets shallow.

Or some guys are attracted to wild, dangerous girls, and then are surprised when the girls run around and cheat on them wildly and dangerously.

I'm not saying you have any of those problems, as you didn't mention being restricted to any particular type of girl and only wanting to date that type, I just thought I would mention it in case anybody reading this answer might be helped by it. ;-)


thanks for your advice, i really appresiate it. PS. sadly most woman are superficial, but same to most men...

bio
DangerWench
Want to know how to keep your questions from being rated down? Click Here!

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I'm DangerNerd's wife. We met on an internet personals site back in December, 1996. He flew across country to meet me for the first time in late February of 1997, and we were married a few weeks later. We've been together 9 years now. :-)

If you want to mail me, my email is DangerWench@gmail.com

Yes, I do sometimes copy and paste my own answers to answer different people's similar questions. I still personalize/edit them when necessary... but for instance, my advice about diet and exercise it going to be pretty much the same every time, and that's a very common subject for questions here... so there's no point in typing the same thing over and over and over again. ;-)

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Yes, hubby and I were both virgins on our wedding night, at the age of 26. Yes, we are both Christians, but we greatly dislike what "Christianity" (or "Churchianity") has come to represent in many people's minds these days... Hypocrisy, greed, pride... Things which the Bible says we are NOT supposed to do. We are supposed to be a good example, not a bad one. :-(

If you have a Christian acquaintance who is hitting you over the head with "Jesus will bring you peace and joy and happiness" tell them to listen to this:

http://www.dangernerd.com/kirkcameron.mp3

(It's 9 megs, so it may take a bit to download)

If you can't download MP3's for some reason, you can download the zip file.

http://www.dangernerd.com/kirkcameron.zip

If they are an actual preacher/pastor, this one is geared more towards them:

http://www.dangernerd.com/raycomfort.zip

Send them the link, or burn it to CD and give it to them, whatever it takes.

If they really listen to that, they will see how the Bible itself says the way they are annoying you is wrong. :-)

If you are a Christian, please listen to it, even if you aren't beating people over the head with Jesus. I promise you, it will give you a new perspective. It's totally awesome.

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I'm also fascinated by prophesy, and I do think we are living in an age where we are seeing many things come true that were prophesied 1,000's of years ago.

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There has been a lot of hubbub lately regarding my views on the differences between Catholicism and *exclusively* Bible-Based Christianity... Mostly due to my not making myself clear. I did have a big long explanation here, but this time I will opt for the KISS method (Keep It Simple, Stupid). Yes, the following is the simplified version. ;-)

The Catholic Church believes that the Bible is not the only authority. Their teachings include such documentation as Catechisms, and Papal Encyclicals (defined as "authoritative teaching instruments from the Vicar of Christ" (the Pope)) which have been written and added to throughout the years of the history of the Catholic Church.

Because of this, the Catholic Church has many teachings, beliefs, and traditions that are different from a Christian who believes the Holy Bible is the exclusive authority of Christianity.

A Catholic Christian believes in the Catholic doctrines, teachings, and traditions which include, but are *not exclusive to* the Holy Bible.

Most non-Catholic Christians believe the Holy Bible is the *exclusive* authority of Christianity... No other documents.

Much argument comes from this, as quite a few non-Catholic Christians (myself included) believe many of the man-made Catholic doctrines to be un-Christian and not corresponding with Biblical scripture. And obviously, Catholics disagree.

For more information about the differences between Catholicism and *exclusively* Bible-Based Christianity, see the following link:

Roman Catholic Doctrine vs. The Holy Bible

And a final note about that link... That e-book isn't written by Jack Chick, I have a lot of problems with Mr. Chick. Some of his tracts are great, and some of them are way "out there" if you know what I mean. I do not support Jack Chick. This e-book is written by Rick Jones, who was a Catholic for many years, not Chick.



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"This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away. For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts, Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth." (2Timothy 3:1 - 7)

"And there shall be signs in the sun, and in the moon, and in the stars; and upon the earth distress of nations, with perplexity; the sea and the waves roaring..." (Luke 21:25)

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Yahweh is my God, Yeshua is my Savior.


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