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January 13, 2005Answers:
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hey i'm in college and i'm really shy. i can't seem to make friends with anyone in class. i have friends in my dorm and im comfortable with them, but i see people in my class that i would want to be friends with, but i can't seem to get myself to talk to anyone. i like crawl inside myself and no matter what i can't say anything. especially to guys (im female). i've been trying real hard to open up, but i just can't seem to do that. any advice on how to start opening up and becoming more comfortable with myself and be able to talk to people without being scared that they won't like me? i know im in college and shoud be over that already, and i am for the most part, its just when im surrounded by people i dont know it makes it really hard. thanks in advance to anyone who answers this
Hi! I used to be exactly the same. I think the only thing you can do is find out who you are and learn to like that - you can't like other people unless you like yourself :)
Talk to random people, smile at them in the hallways...start with small things, such as when you accidentally bump into someone, don't just mumble sorry and run off - say it loud, look at them and stop them to ask them for the time!
Try talking to someone in your class who seems easily approachable. Say hi to them, ask them how they're enjoying the course, agree with them on how boring your lecture was, anything! Start by talking about something you have in common with them. And remember that if they don't respond, it doesn't matter - there are hundreds more people out there to be friends with! Take it all in your stride and learn from any 'mistakes' you make while trying to make friends - e.g. not keeping eye contact, talking too fast, etc.
Also remember that you don't have to be friends with every single one of these people - most you'll never see ever again once college is over anyway, and it's fine to have a small amount of friends :)
I know it's hard, but the only way to do it is to just get in there and get on with it.
Good luck, and message me sometime to say how it's going!!
Blessed Be,
Rach xxx
(Rating: 5) thanks that was really good advice. i'm gonna try and start off small and see if i can get more comfortable with it and then maybe that will help me be more outgoing