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Well, I'm a second year college student. I have had my share of embarrassing moments, troubling times and I'm not the girl who got all the guys--so at least you'll know my advice is sincere and relatable, not perfect in an imaginary world. Any questions whatsoever are welcome, I'll try my best to answer accordingly.
Gender: Female
Location: Miami
Occupation: Student
Member Since: August 4, 2006
Answers: 334
Last Update: February 14, 2008
Visitors: 19290


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Brandi_S
Hi I'm sorry if this is the wrong section but i didnt know where to put it. Any I need some advice. For a 13 year old girl who is 5'7" what weight is appropriate? I weigh 105.

People say im skinny coz you can see my ribs and those bones above your breasts, but I'm not coz i have huge thighs! Im gonna be on vacation soon, and I wanna look good in a bikini.

I wanna lose weight, but I'm also kind of scared. I've never tried to lose weight before, but I'm vegetarian so i dont have that much fat. Every time I try and eat less, I end up seeing cookies or something and I eat like 5 and then I hate myself and I start to do sit ups and cry. How do I avoid these temptations?

Ive also started throwing away my lunch at school without eating any of it, but I feel really bad for wasting the food. How can I not waste it, but not eat it?


I need help!! Anything about what im going through is great!!!! THANK YOU! (link)
Having big hips, is probably just your natural body shape. You are very thin for your height. I have friends who are like 5 feet and weigh 105, and they look thin.

All i could suggest to you, is to eat less fattening things. Refer to the food pyramid for a proper diet. Also, throwing away your lunch is worse. All you will end up doing, is losing some pounds now, and then gaining it all quickly. So, don't stop eating, just eat better.

Honestly, I don't think you need to lose weight, you probably need to gain some pounds. But, if you are unhappy, the only thing I can suggest, is eating healthier.

Much luck kid,

Teacup


Hey thanks for your advice. My birthday was yesterday and I went out shopping and I was a little upset casue some of my friends didnt want to do anything or go out anywhere as I was hurt. But I just relaxed last night and I dont know if like that had anything to do with it but this morning I got my period So thank GOD :) THank you so much for your help and I will use your advice in the future! (link)
It was probably because of that. I'm glad you got your period.

Just remember, you can't live your life stressed.


Hey thanks for answering my question from yesterday. I hope that it is just from stress. do you know some ways to help me distress?? Thanks (link)
Just make sure to make time for you. Like, taking an hour to do something you love, working out, yoga, shopping *i call that retail therapy*, having someone to help you solve your problems and make you less stressed.

My personal favorite has got to be writing, just letting all the bad feelings out, it feels like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

I hope it helps.

Best of Luck,
Teacup


Me and my friend were "fooling around" and he touched his penis to make sure that he didnt have any pre cum on himself. Then after he did he wiped his hands on his boxers and a few minutes later he fingered me. He is very honest and I believe him when he said that there was nothing on his hands but if there was a little bit is it possible to get pregnant. I mean we are talking about almost nothing. probably nothing. I am four days late for my period. But I highly doubt that its because of that. I am very stressed out and worried about many things right now. So I need your advice what do you think my chances are? THANKS (link)
The stress is making you late. I didn't have my period once for like 3 months...and it was all because of stress. I'll tell you what my doctor told me (it was obvious, but it worked) stop being stressed!Make sure you are getting enough sleep, eating well and taking time to destress.


15/f
I have a 5 month year old son with my boyfriend. I considered adoption from the start, but it was too hard to say goodbye so I pulled out at the last minute. (Which made my boyfriend happy, surprisingly.) My mom (my dad isn't a part of my life) gave in and said she'd raise him for me if I helped. Now that school's in, it's becoming harder. We have to pay the babysitter, pick him up, etc. Plus, I made the cheerleading squad. Neither of us have time for him and my boyfriend's family can't take him. Mom wants me to reconsider adoption, but I can't give up my baby now! But I also don't want to give up being a cheerleading and all the other fun stuff in high school. Mom's afraid my grades will slip. So am I. But my bf and I have grown so attached to ourson. We plan on getting married and raising him together once we're out of high school. But what can I do until then? It's too stessful! HELP!!! Please! (link)
It honestly sounds like you have too much on your plate. Your son is probably the most important thing to you, and second to that should be your school work. If you can't handle it...even if it's hard to let go, you may have to let go of cheerleading. But, I would just offer that as a last resort, because I find it admirable that you want to keep up with cheerleading, it's kind of a statement, though you have a child you haven't disgraced your life. Kudos on that. Does your bf have extracurricular activities, see if he can help out more.

Good luck,
Teacup


is it true that the average joe only uses about 10 percent of their brain and that people like psychics or w/e have learned to "tune in" to the other part of their brain and thats how they "see" stuff? (link)
We use all of our brain...just 10% at one time.


my girlfriend does not trust me anymore and tells me to prove and i dont no how so tell me how i can prove it. (link)
Well if you want your girlfriend's trust, just be as considerate as you can be. Then she'll know that she is included in very important factions of your life, and she will feel like she is definitely important enough to be included and she'll trust you because she'll know what you are doing.

Also, something guys don't typically notice is when other girls flirt with them...so...uh...pay attention and don't flirt with other girls.

K Good luck!

-TEacup


alright so me and my boyfriend have been going out for several months now and i love him alot, and he says he loves me and he said he wants to spend the rest of his life with me and so do i, but when he talks to like any girl even my best friend i get really paranoid and he gets even more paranoid if i talk to a guy. how can we both stop getting paranoid with each other when we talk to the opposite sex? (link)
If you guys trust each other...talking to members of the opposite sex should not be a problem. I would suggest you both have a talk and assure each other that you love each other and no one else can break that, because if you don't...eventually you will have pushed everyone away and you'll be the couple that only hangs out with one another.


I have so much on my plate right now. I'm a junior in high school. I'm constantly thinking/worrying about the SAT, college, my weight [even though I'm thinner than average], my GPA, the graduation test, my first job, my first car, my future career, my friends.. I worry about everything. It's like I have an illness because I can't stop worrying for one minute.

One of my classes really scares me because I'm not good at it. I'm scared to the point that I feel like I'm really cold and my teeth won't stop chattering and my body won't stop shaking, all because of a speech, or a test, etc.

I'm also anorexic. I'm 10-15 pounds lighter than I should be, but half of me is saying "Who cares what the average weight is? my stomach is humungous" and the other half is saying "Everyone thinks you're too skinny and you are". I lean toward the "I'm fat" side and regulate everything that goes into my mouth.

I think that my eating disorder and extreme worrying are causing me to have depression. I'm never happy unless I'm with my friends. Once I come home, I start the worrying process. I also have experienced serious panic attacks. I hate how I'm never happy =( I'm 16 and most people my age don't worry about anything except what to buy at the mall. I've gone to 3 therapists. One helped, one was okay, and another didn't, so I don't rely on therapy anymore.

What do I do? (link)
Ok...obviously not all therapy didn't work on you...but there was one that did. Why don't you go back to the one you said helped you? Your eating disorder is definitely the first thing you need checked out.


About school..it's good that you are focusing on the SAT early...I would suggest, you buy an SAT book (amazon.com sells them cheap) and study hard...and take it around the end of your junior year..well like March. You want to start studying early...but you don't have to at the moment.

As for your future...don't worry about it now. As long as you do well in school, you'll be fine. I mean think about it...what else can you do about it. If you stay on the right path...then you know you will be alright. So...don't freak about it. Even if you are in college...it's not as if you have to declare your major. So please calm down...all this additional stress is not good for you...take it from someone who has had her share of stress. Breathe...and don't worry about it now.

As for a car and a job..maybe you are just not ready for it...why not wait til the summer to get them...you should be less busy and won't stress over it...so by the time school starts again...you'll have the hang of it.

The graduation test...again as long as you are doing everything you are supposed to do then...you have no reason not to pass the test.

Ask your friends for help and support...it'll make you feel better.

If you are scared of getting a bad grade...don't hesitate asking questions in class (even if you think you sound stupid)and even if you need to get a tutor...get one.

I hope everything works out for you. Please stop stressing...just remember you can't do anything about certain things right now...it's out of your control. Just work hard and you'll be fine.

Good Luck!

Teacup


ok. so i have this friend who's a boy. we've been friends for about a year now, but if feels as if we've known each other forever. this afternoon, he IMed me and said that he's kind of having girl problems. i was kind of surprised because he's not really the girl-obsessed kind of type. he likes this girl that likes him back. but he can't go out with her because of his parents. i gave him some suggestions, but i don't know if he'll actually consider it. he seemed annoyed. even though i didn't hear his voice, i know him well enough to know when he doesn't feel normal. and i knew this situation is really bugging him. but throughout our conversation, i got really... umm... i don't really know how to explain it... jealous maybe? i guess i kind of was. i know that i don't like him as anything more than a friend. we're just really cool friends. nothing more. atleast for the moment. most of my friends say that me and him has that "chemistry" thing going on. and i guess i can say the same thing, we have a WHOLE LOT of things in common, but i've never thought of our friendship as anything more than that. i'm really happy that he likes a girl and that the girl likes him back and all, but i don't know, i feel something weird. i feel like i want him for myself. that maybe if he gets another girl in his life, me and him might grow apart, and have all his attention to the girl. even though i felt this way, i still told him to go for it - "ask her out if you really like her." i really want him to be happy even if it does give me pain. and as for me, i wanna focus on my own life and let him be. but knowing the person i am, that's not gonna happen. curiousity gets in the way all the time. and i don't want that. so what can i do? i would greatly appreciate any advice/comments.

13/f (link)
There are many different things that could be going on.

1. You just don't want another girl to replace you as his most trusted person.
2. You may be soo attached to him, and care so much for him like a brother.
3. You may just like him.

I have sort of been in this predicament and I didn't do the right thing. I ended up getting jealous because I liked him, and he liked another girl...our friendship ended for about half a year..because we got into a big argument.

I regret it, because it was a terrible thing to lose him like a friend. But, now we are really good friends again, and he again likes another girl...and I know not to make the same mistake twice. I try to be there for him, and give him whatever advice he needs.

Hope this helps kiddo,
Teacup


ok i am 15 1/2 and my bf is 16 1/2 can my mom turn him for rape if we have sex? i live in california (link)
Actually, I am pretty sure he can. In law class, we spoke about it, and the guy would be blamed even if he is not legal. I am not 100% sure since this was a while ago, but I am pretty sure he can be.

-Teacup


i just bought this really cute comforter called "fifi" from bed bath and beyond and its like paris themed. and i was wondering if anyone had any ideas on what i could do to my room to add onto that. i'm thinking of paintings so if anyone can think of a picture that would fit into the paris theme, please let me know! thanks! (link)
Well, I think the ideas the other two people who posted before me were very cute.

So I just wanted to add...that Paris is the home of The Louvre...so you could add imitation paintings of the ones in The Louvre like the Mona Lisa or even a picture of the Louvre would work.

Pictures in black and white...I feel add an elegant touch that can be associated with France.http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/d1/Vj_day_kiss.jpg


Well...hope this helps =].

--Teacup






College starts Monday and I'm having the same feeling I had the day before freshman year started in high school [really scared and in one week I already knew it was easy]. Is it the same going from high school to college [you're worried but soon learn how much easier it is than you thought]? (link)
Hey! I'm moving away to college for the first time too in 2 days. I'm scared too, but I'm also very excited. I like that I'm going to be independent, and I know that if I work hard and just focus on what I want...I won't fail.

Obviously, I don't know if college is going to be easier than what we've been told, but I know there's going to be a lot of adjustment to do, and if you stick with it, you'll be fine.

Good Luck! =]

--Teacup


are there any stores that sell hollister and abercrombie for less cuzi im on a tight budget! please help if you know any stores! =] (link)
I don't think there are stores that sell hollister and abercromie for less money...but what you can do is try to go to these stores when they have sales.

If not, you should try finding similar clothes for less money. American Eagle can sometimes be a little cheaper, if not Aeropostle. I went to Aeropostle on Sunday...and all the tops were 50% off.

Hope this helps,
Teacup


i was always a diligent student. not a slacker. well, ever since last year, I feel too incredibly lazy to work. it's not really even lazy because i can go outside and work out and do stuff like that, BUT, i can't do school work anymore and i don't like it. i get super distracted, like more than usual. i read things, and i don't understand them. and it's only with school. i don't know. it's mot really a good thing. it's like school isn't even a priority. and i don't want to be a slacker. i got ok grades last year. but, i want to do even better! could i have ADD? i don't know. any advice would be helpful (link)
I'm not sure about the ADD thing...but sometimes focusing on school is hard. I've been there. I would do anything to avoid doing homework...talk on the phone, go online, watch tv, etc. But, I would always force myself to do my hw...even if it meant staying up all night to get it done.

All I can say is...you need to fight the lethargy. Remember, doing well in school is important to get into a good college. Plus, doing well is always a good way to get your parents to give you special rewards (not the main reason to try to do well, but hey it's an incentive). Tell yourself that getting your hw done and studying is your first priority. Read and stop ever so often and rephrase what you have read...that way you are keeping track of whether or not you are actually reading and understanding.

If you find that even if you try your hardest, and you can't keep yourself focused, you may want to speak to your doctor to see if you have ADD.

Good Luck,
Teacup


Hi,

I recently bought some clothes from the Hollister at my mall. I am a 17 year old boy and think the clothes are nice.

When I got home and showed my 13 year old brother the clothes I got (a polo and a sweatshirt) he started screaming at me and said that only posers and gays were Hollister.

I know quite a few people don't like Hollister and quite a few people do.

I am wondering what people think of boys who wear Hollister? (link)
It really depends on the person. This much is certain though...you will attract a lot of preppy girls who are also into Hollister.

I'm not all that into Hollister, but I like that it's more of a clean-cut look, it's appealing. =]


Good Luck,
Teacup


For Homecoming, do you get a long dress or a shorter dress? Is it really fancy, like should I buy a facy dress? (link)
At my high school, Homecoming was semi-formal, and most girls wore knee length dresses. Some barely wore long dresses. The idea is...that for everything else that is not prom, you dress semi-formal.

But yeah, this is something you need to ask around at your school.

--Teacup


im not the smartest person in the world. i only get good grades sometimes and i have 2 get good grades a lot this year becuz its senior year. and im kinda excited and a lil' scared becuz i dont know what i wanna major in and i dont know how im gonna get 2 college. i still need 2 take my SATs and i wanna graduate. if anybody has any tips on how to get prepared for college, please help me out. (link)
ok...the first thing I would do...is right now...buy an SAT prep book (you can get them much cheaper on amazon.com). Study hard...and you can take the test in October. Don't slack off on your school work, make sure you do really well...especially in core classes (english, math, science, gov't)...because most colleges recalculate gpas...and only care about important classes.

Do you know where you want to go to? Do you want to be close to home? Do you want to leave a little further but have a place that your friends will be too? For example, I live in Miami...and I'm going to UF...and though it is about a 5 hour drive, I know I have a base of support in the friends that are also going there. If you don't know where you want to go...you should start searching. College board is a great place to search..because they give you information about the different divisions and majors offered.

Also, about college...make sure you apply early. It shows that you want to go to that school. UF had about 3 different admission dates. Early decision (which means you are signing a contract saying that you won't apply to any other school til you get their decision and it shows that this is your number one choice) and this was around sept. that it was due. Reg. decision I..it's early but it wasn't binding and you could apply to other colleges and it was around October, and lastly Reg. decision II...same premise as the reg. decision I, you just more time since it was due in January.

Also, if you apply for summer term...your chances of being accepted are increased.

By the way, you can apply to college first and later send them your SAT scores.

Make sure your essays are well written, and are a reflection of you, and that they genuinely make the reader interested. Get teachers to read them for you.

If you need recommendations from your teachers...ask them EARLY! That's the best way to get good recommendations.


Lastly, don't worry about not knowing what to major in. College is about finding out what you want and who you are, so you can declare 'undecided' as your major, and gradually find out what you want to major in.

Good Luck...if you have any questions...feel free to ask me. Remember your college advisor in school can be a great help with these things too.

--Teacup


Lately I haven't been able to fall asleep til like 6 oclock in the morning.

I don't mind staying up till 12:00 or 1:30 but this has gotten ridiculous. I can't sleep, and when I do sleep I sleep til all hours of the day.

It seems like I can't get enough sleep when I do fall asleep, and I'm very groggy.

HELP? I need advice on how to make me tired, or what is causing this. (link)
You may have insomnia.

Do you drink lots of coffee in the day, you should cut down on it? Do you take naps...don't. Try reading a book when you want to go to sleep, it always makes me sleepy, so it may help you too.

Another thing you may want to do is...go to sleep at whatever time you fall asleep...but force yourself to wake up early and only get a little bit of sleep. That way, you'll get sleepy earlier on in the day.

But if none of these things work, you should speak to a doctor.

Good Luck,
Teacup


I really need to know about high school. i am soooooo scared about it. in the movies, they make high school seem like hell. i know it won't be like the movies but i think it will be bad. i go to high school in one year for the first time. is it bad? or am i making it seem this bad? thanks! (link)
High school is not bad. Sure, it's a little more stressful at times, but it's doable. It's actually pretty fun. You get more liberties and there are more fun things to do in school. I loved high school, it was great!

Luck,
Teacup




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