I need to know if my husband is cheating.I am 23 and he is 20. We have a 4 month old son and have been married almost a year. He is working out of state( In Florida and I'm in Texas) and living with a bunch of his single friends. We had been having problems even before he left, but since he got there we have been fighting constatntly over the phone.If he decides he's done talking he will hang up and either turn his phone off or just ignore my calls and text messages. He always seems to be busy (working, eating, showering, going to the gym,ect.) There are times when I can't get a hold of him and he tells me he left his phone in the other room. We had an argument and he truned his phone off all night. I recieved a text message to my phone the next morning that read" sorry about last night. My baby's mom was calling all night so I turned my phone off." He claims it was his friends playing a joke and that they did teh same thing to another guy too. However, He was not even angery about it. He seemed to not care at all. Of course he denied cheating. That same day I discovered pictures of naked girls dancing on a bar on his phone while online. He says his brother took them because he didn't have a camera phone. What should I think? Is he cheating? How can I catch him when he's so far away? Your advice would be greatly appreciated.
anonymous -
I don't think there's a definite way to "catch him". I'm unsure of your relationship history so I'm not sure if my advice will be of much assistance.
Ask yourself these questions:
-why did he marry you?
-has he had a shady past of being a flirt?
-what kind of signs (other than the ones you provided) has he given that has pointed in the direction of cheating?
-is he a party guy?
I'm not sure how well you know him, so I can't really say. But from the information you provided, his behavior is indeed unacceptable. My opinion is that if he has been good to you 99% of the time you've been together with him, then I would trust him for the most part. But if he's been behaving like this for awhile, then yes, I would assume that he's cheating.
The only thing that lingers in my mind is if your husband is smart or not. Lol it sounds funny, but if a guy were to cheat on you, he'd be secretive about it. Why would he "accidentally" spill the beans to you repeatedly by leaving you suspicious text messages, having pictures of girls on his phone, basically leaving breadcrumbs for you to follow to bust him? If he were cheating, I'd say he would be the stupidest cheater out there.
Since he's acting immature, my advice would be to try (as hard as it will be) to "appear" not to care. Like a previous columnist said, turn the tables on him. Not like in a revenge sort of sense, but make him start to worry about you. Like if you don't pick up the phone or talk to him days at a time he'd realize sooner or later something is wrong. If he were a good husband, he'd either keep calling to see if you're alright or at least leave a voicemail to check up on your well being. And if he were cheating, or just didn't care, he wouldn't bother. That's the only way to find out for sure not if he's cheating, but if he's a good husband.
Good luck hun.
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do you know where i can download full length female squirting movie?
anonymous -
What intrigues me is how you haven't considered using a SEARCH ENGINE...?
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15 F
I have a question about dating/love.
I mean, whats the point? You date, you "fall in love", you break up, your heart is broken. I don't believe that love exists among teens. They all go around saying I love you to the first person they meet without ever actaully knowing what it feels like. I've done it, I admit and when I said "I love you" I knew I didn't mean it. I only said so because he said it first. I always told myself that I would never say those 3 words unless I really thought I was "In Love". I broke the promise that I had with myself and i'm starting to think that love is just a word that everyone throws around. I mean IS there really true love? Everyone is so wrapped up in having a boy/girl friend do they ever see the pattern they make? All the tears and confusion. Is it worth it when your only 15? Why can't all the hormones be turned off until were considered a adult? Seriously.
-------------------------------------------------
Feedback is all I desire but do try to sound just bit intelligent in your answers. Don't make me wonder if the schooling system is failing too.
AG
AG -
It's funny because I thought exactly the same way you did when I was in high school. I saw my friends go through "assembly line dating" like you mentioned. Fall for a guy, date him, break up, mourn, move on.
But yes there is true love. There really isn't a definite way to explain it, hell, there isn't even a definite meaning to it, but I'll give my relationship as an example.
I never looked into getting a boyfriend, ever. Seeing the heartbreak that surrounded me constantly, if anything, I feared love! I wanted to save myself up until college to date, where people are mature and begin to know what they want in a boyfriend/girlfriend.
I was only 16 at the time when I met my current boyfriend. Like I said, I was not looking for a relationship, and we started out as friends. The day he asked me out, I told him that I wasn't looking for a relationship. I really liked him, but even so, I was keeping myself rom getting hurt. However, he said that he'd wait all those years just to be with me. I put his word to the test and it was a good two months until I agreed to date him. Why, because he was committed to being with me to wait two months for a definite answer. He was also committed to opening me up (I was a REALLY shy girl) and being with me that he didn't speak to any other girl during those two months. He is able to accept me for who I am, flaws and all, and is committed to loving me and being with me.
We've been together almost three years now, and yes I can say that I do love him (he is also my first boyfriend). The reason why we've been together so long is because we fulfill what we want out of our ideal boyfriend and girlfriend. Every relationship has it's trials and tribulations, but the fact that we are able to stick it out because we mean so much to each other to make it work, is love...even at 16.
The "I love you" phrase is sometimes underrated like you said where people misuse it and toss it around casually. It really varies from person to person on whether love is really worth it. If you meet the right person, and you yourself know what you want out of a relationship and are committed to it, true love CAN exist, regardless of age.
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I have a bad attitude about school and i cant change it. I have alot of missing math assingmets, i don want to do them: they are super hard. I hate school, I would rather laze around all day...
anonymous -
I know you're probably feeling that this lazyness won't catch up to you, but think of it this way: you see those bums on the streets? How much education do you think they have? I don't think you want to end up like that.
Especially in a world that revolves around money, you need a good education in order to make good money. The reason why your assignments are too hard is because you don't pay attention, gave up, or just aren't trying at your fullest potential.
My advice is get your butt in gear and start paying attention. Don't give up hope now, you still have a lot ahead of you. You can make learning a little more bearable by paying attention in class, taking great notes, reserving time for homework, and vice versa.
If you have trouble paying attention, like staying awake, bring something that will keep your attention in gear. Like bring chewing gum or a water bottle to keep your body busy to keep you awake. If it's paying attention, find ways to make it interesting. Read textbooks and outline chapters independently at home also. It helps a lot. You can also compile a study group.
As for taking notes, take notes from lectures and the textbook. If you have trouble keeping up, bring a tape recorder.
Manage your time well by reserving a time for fun stuff and a time for homework. After you get it done, you have a lot more time on your hands and a big load off your shoulders.
Good luck.
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Ok, I've been seeing this guy for almost 4 years (I know, quite a long time!) I met him at uni and now I am in my final year at uni and he is working miles away. We have never been apart like this before as we were always together at uni.
I have mixed feelings about how much longer I want the relationship to go on for. Whenever we speak on the phone he says something stupid or puts me in a bad mood and makes me unhappy.
I feel I want some time to be young free and single especially as I have been witht the same guy for such a long time. Surely these signs mean it won't last??
Also, I went for dinner with some friends of my flatmate and I met this guy who I found really attractive.
I would never ever cheat on my boyfriend but why am I thinking of this other guy all the time when I should be thinking about my boyfriend?
We all went out last night to a club and he was there. He walked me home. Nothing happened but it was so nice to have some attention from someone else and for some reason he made me feel more wanted than my boyfriend does.
Help!! I am so frustrated I don't know what to do! Even if anything did happen, this guy goes back to Australia at the end of May.
Thank you so much if u do reply - i really appreciate it and will give you all 5's! x
x -
Don't worry, what you're feeling is perfectly normal. The feeling that you want to be single again doesn't imply that it won't last, but perhaps your relationship with your boyfriend is starting to get a little boring. As for being flattered, every girl loves to be flattered. Just so long as you know the limits, you're fine. And for thinking about other guys, don't feel like you're limited to thinking about your boyfriend 24/7. It's ok to find someone else attractive, and acknowledge that feeling, but keep it at that.
The reason you feel this way is because you've been with your boyfriend for so long, and now since you don't spend time with each other as often, you miss feeling loved and cared for now that he's far away, and you're starting to consider your options. You just feel isolated is all. Also, because he's been making you feel unhappy lately (the distance is probably unbearable to him and he takes it out on you), you're emotions are taking it's toll on you where you form a grudge against your boyfriend for saying those things, and then you start to cultivate thoughts such as "why is he treating me like this? a good boyfriend wouldn't do that." Then these thoughts lead to thinking about other people...
My boyfriend and I have been together for nearly three years, and I get flattered when guys give me attention as well. However, I would never cheat on him because I love him a great deal. I've had the same feelings that maybe I want to depart from my boyfriend to pursue the single life, but what has kept me with him are his great qualities like commitment, loyalty, honesty, and he's really sweet. Think about this, how many other guys can you find like that out there?
Hope this helps!
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My boyfriend an I have made plans for the future. I never ask for advice, I rather give it.. but I find myself at a loss of words when him and I tackle a few subjects. Our relationship is amazing, everything is going right, and is headed in a positive direction. However, for quite some time now.. I've believed strongly in a few select topics. And he refuses to be open-minded about these things. He relies on the excuse, "It's how I was brought up." I'm sorry if it's being unsympathetic, but I just don't see that as an excuse. He's an adult, he can make up his own mind. Everytime we talk about these things, it starts a debate, which neither of us can seem to win. If there would be one thing that would end our relationship, it would be this. He denies that he's closed-minded and it's a pointless argument everytime to him, but he refuses to change and I refuse to be okay with this. Any advice?
anonymous -
Although you believe strongly on a few select topics, respect his beliefs on it as well. You can't force someone to think the way you do because you believe that you are right. Although you may disagree with his arguments on a topic, respect it.
As for his excuse of "how I was brought up", it may sound unreasonable to you, but in a sense it does have some validity. For example, some families bring their kids up in a Christian background so in turn, they would oppose abortion and disagree with gay marriage. They were taught these kind of concepts through the growing process, so it's only natural for them to feel how they feel about something based upon their childhood or background in general.
My boyfriend and I argue about homosexuals all the time. He's a homophobe while I'm really ok with it. Although I don't agree with how he feels toward gays, I don't mind it because he will feel how he wants to feel. Who am I to try and change his beliefs? After all, I would want him to respect my opinions as well, so who am I to say anything?
The best advice that I can give you is to respect your boyfriend wholeheartedly and accept him for who he is, beliefs and all. Don't make big deals about controversial subjects, just keep it civil instead or steer clear of it altogether. The reason it appears pointless to your boyfriend is because he'd rather spend quality time with you instead of bicker at each other. Realize that the best way to learn and understand a certain subject is to hear and consider the opposing argument. Keep that in mind.
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My boyfriend's parents just don't like me and I can't figure out why! I don't smoke, drink, or do anything like that. I'm in college with a 4.0 GPA for Journalism and Communications and I do lots of volunteer work. What's not to like?!? All my ex-boyfriend's mom's have loved me to death: I even still hang out with one of them! I also do so many things for my boyfriend, such as when he has a big test to study for, I'll organize his desk, do his laundry, or bring him dinner. I leave him sweet notes in the morning! We've been going out for 2 years, and he absolutely loves me, yet his parents have a different opinion. They tell him that he needs to date other people and that they don't think I'm right for him. This is just so strange to me! What's going on?
anonymous -
I think that his parents will always have that feeling that no girl is "perfect" for their son, regardless of her status/credentials.
My boyfriend's parents think of me the same way. Just hang in there and be patient. If his parents don't see the good you do for him, then they don't have any reason to believe you're right for him; because sometimes although you see all of the good things you do for him, they may not. But if they do, just hang in there. Although they may seem like they shrug it all off, the effort is really appreciated compared to if you quit altogether.
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Hi.. I've been going out with my boyfriend for over 8 months now. His birthdays coming up and i have no clue what to get him. Mine just past and he got my soo much nice stuff. Hes into skateboarding and stuff like that but im really having trouble on deciding what to buy. If you have any ideas.. Please let me know!! THANKS!
anonymous -
Be creative. A guy wants to know that you put in the extra effort to make something original, especially for him. It'll make him feel all mushy inside.
If that's not appealing and you have a lot of money to spend, get him that new handheld Playstation PSP. Any guy will love that! :)
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I'm going to camp in the summer for the first time in my life. (I'm 14) I've known my friends for 3 years and they've never known me without makeout. I don't use alot but a little bit of eyeliner makes a hugeee difference! Anyways, I don't know what I should do because I don't want my friends to see me makeup-less...I mean, with makeup, I look "decent" but without, you won't even recognize me on the street. I look horrible! Please don't say..your friends should love you for you..I'm very self concious about myself and I really want to know what to do. Thanks in advance-I rate!
anonymous -
Gradually bring it down a little. Like everyday when you hang out with your friends, refrain from applying one step of makeup (like foundation). The next day refrain from another step, and vice versa. As long as you don't wear an inch of makeup, I don't think your friends will really notice.
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16/f--I don't have BAD acne, but I have little red bumps on my face (I wash my face twice a day, but I just somehow still get little pimples). As I said, its not that bad and its nothing makeup can't fix. I've been using two different kinds of face makeup (liquid stuff and powder stuff), but I just ran out. I don't want to use the same stuff, but I'm not sure what to use. I'm not that experienced with types of makeup and what they do. Whats the difference between concealer, foundation, compact, and any other face makeup, and what exactly do they do?
Thank you.
anonymous -
Here are the basics:
Foundation - provides overall coverage to even out skin tone
Concealer - "conceals" undereye circles and supposedly for pimples (would not recommend for blemishes)
Compact - usually is pressed powder; used for touch-ups throughout the day to keep that shine down
Bronzer - provides a golden-tan look, good for summer
Application:
First and foremost, apply a good oil-free moisterizer on the face with spf. Wait until it dries and penetrates, it'll give you a "dewy" look.
Concealer - Apply this on undereye circles by tapping lightly and gently blending. Do not use a wiping motion, or you'll wipe it completely off your face. Set with loose powder and proceed with foundation.
Foundation - You can either use a triangular sponge or your fingertips for application. Since you have acne, I wouldn't recommend a foundation that has heavy coverage, opt for something more sheer. I use Jane Stay Calm Foundation (found at Wal-mart) which is pretty sheer if you apply it right. I find it's better than some department store brands :) You use this first all over your face just to even out skin tone, but don't apply too much. For the pimples, you use foundation, NOT concealer to hide them (because foundation is meant to be your exact skin color, concealer is used as a shade lighter. if you use concealer, the pimples will stand out more). For the blemishes, just tap lightly over the blemish with your finger or a concealer brush until it's totally concealed. Set with loose powder and brush off excess with a powder brush.
Compact - Use for touch-ups throughout the day if you feel your face getting shiny.
Hope this helps!
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I am a mother of four and none of my children will eat vegetables or fruit. The oldest is 13 and the youngest 7. I fed them vegetables and fruit in baby food as yound children, but they just don't like it now. I was the same as a child and so I didn't push them. However, while they're not unhealthy, I'd like them to start eating at least a bit more healthily, what with all this stuff going around about overweight kids and cholestrol, etc etc etc. So, my question is: does anyone have any recipies or ideas to make fruit and vegetables tasty and fun?
Also, my thirteen-year-old just got braces and can't eat anything hard for a few days, so I was wondering if it would be safe for to eat baby food? I know it has nothing added to it but I was just wondering if it was OK for a 13 year old to eat that and only that (obviously with drinks, and different varieties of the food) for three or four days?
Also, my friend has suggested using baby food or vegetable pureè as pasta sauces. Do you think this would work?
Thanks,
-Mum-To-Four
Mum-To-Four -
I currently have braces too, and baby food although safe, probably wouldn't sound too appealing for a 13 year old! Try to feed her easy to chew and swallow things like soups, oatmeal, mashed potatoes, etc.
Here are some ideas for fruit and veggies:
Fruit:
-smoothies
-fruit cocktails (diced up fruits w/ interesting shapes with a mix of fruit juice and carbonated water)
-fruit parfait (layer yogurt [plain or flavored] and a mixture of their favorite fruits and top off with granola)
-fruit pancakes or crepes with little chocolate chips (have them make their own)
-jello jigglers with strawberries or preferred fruit
Veggies:
-vegetable soup (be creative and incorporate a variety of veggies and be sure to flavor well to appeal to their taste buds)
-roasted vegetables (rub with butter or olive oil, flavor with herbs and seasonings, top off with optional "toppings" such as parmesan cheese or bacon bits); have them on extra long kabob sticks and roast it over a fire or grill
-roasted corn on the cob is always a favorite (rub with herb butter, and top with parmesan cheese and roast in an open fire)
-mashed potatoes with yummy out-of-the-ordinary additions such as spinach-garlic-and herb
-old fashioned ants on a log (celery stick w/ peanut butter and raisins)
-make finger proportions of a variety of vegetables in interesting shapes and stick toothpicks in them for dipping in a dressing or fun dip
I hope this helps!
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Hi, I'm a male 35 yrs of age trying to choose a wife. (1)why do woman dress provocitave like show alot cleavige? (2)why do some woman like to glance or look at a mans crouch? (3)why do some woman constantly talk to thier co-worker about sex/men and penis size what kind of woman is she and how does she realy feel about men? (4)when a group of woman go out every weekend to a nightclub/dance/bar, after exchanging phone numbers and meeting a couple of men, what are thier real intentions? (5)why do woman dress nice/tight/sexy for work, when thier job workplace involves sweat, dirt and lifting boxes? all woman love to look beautiful,but where do u draw the line? All woman love to recieve compliments ,but which are out to seek them? Which is the nice girl and which is the slut? Please include:other websites, links/books/ect.. thank you, needto choosemissrite
needtoschoosemissrite -
Well, all of the things (1-5) that you describe that women do, the only women who do those things are attention seekers, nymphos, or insecure.
To find a nice girl, make sure she doesn't do any of these things first off. If you are with her, you don't want her to dress sexy and have other guys swoon over her. You're more likely to get jealous, she's most likely to get flattered and cheat on you.
A nice girl is a girl who dresses reasonably, I'm sure you know where to draw the line and so should she. She can have style, but she doesn't have to dress like a stripper all the time. Girls who dress like that can't get men based on their personality, so they rely on their looks. A nice girl should be able to win you over with her personality, not her figure.
Those who constantly talk about sexual innuendos are those who are nymphos, which means that sex is as important to them as breathing. You don't want a girl who expects you to be big or perform well in bed, I mean, what man can act under such pressure? A nice girl will accept you and love you for who you are, not the size of your crotch. If you don't meet up to her standards, she will dump you and find someone better. It's as simple as that.
Women with these types of descriptions that you provided are most likely "assembly line daters." I'm not saying all women who do this apply, but MOST LIKELY apply.
I've had friends who behaved as such, and each of them went through 5+ guys by the age of 22. I'm 19 and I've been with one guy for three years.
Find a chick that's willing to be committed. That's what's most important.
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ive got my exams in less than two months and i feel like ive learnt nothing in the last two years. i must have.. but we were given practice papers in maths and i couldnt do hardly any of it.what am i going to do??and im not telling my mom so dont suggest that please. please reply soon. xxxx
anonymous -
What I find best that works for me is to study independently. I don't rely solely on lectures to learn anything; so if you have a textbook, everynight outline a chapter with basic main points and do the practice problems. They usually have a self-check at the end where you can see how they solved it and to see if you're answer is correct. I've been doing this with chemistry, and it really is helping a lot. Also, look back on your previous tests and quizzes and try to figure out what you did wrong on the questions you missed.
Another suggestion is to talk to your teacher about some extra help after school for a tutoring session. This gives you the opportunity to clarify some concept misunderstandings and grasp the information better with one on one contact. If this doesn't work or you do not learn well from that teacher's teaching methods, compile a group of students for a study group. Hold it at someone's house and bring snacks and such to make it a little less awkward and more fun and educational.
You don't have to ask your mom about this, but have you thought about asking her to help you with it? Hopefully she'll be able to remember some knowledge about what you're learning about.
I hope this helps!
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My car has recently strared to squeal/screach when I break. It's not all the time, mostly when I am in traffic. I assumed I needed break pads, so I had a friend check them, and they are fine. She assumed I have a "hard spot" in the pad. Could this be the cause? What else could it be?
anonymous -
I think it may be the brake fluid cuz my mom's car does the same. Ask your friend to check that out.
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okay well i just wrote a question about going on a diet togain weight since im only 100 pounds... well i was jw... but do guys prefer girls that are skinny... or girls of average weight??
anonymous -
It depends on the guy, but a lot of guys like girls with average (i.e. healthy) weight. No guy likes a girl who is too skinny because when they hug you, they don't want to break you cuz you're so fragile!
I think it's better to have a little meat on you compared to looking like a skeleton who just escaped a concentration camp.
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I'm not really one to ask this kind of question..But there's this guy. He goes to another school, I just recently started talking to him over the phone and stuff. We have a lot of chemistry. We always have something to talk about. So I just called him, I haven't talked to him since last night, and he didnt answer his phone. Do you think I should call him again or just wait for him to call?
anonymous -
Just wait for him to call. If he wasn't there when you just called him, calling him again probably won't make much of a difference.
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my best friend that i love (not that kinda way but like a sister) anyways she loves her bf and he loves her to but he is getting tired of her bullshit she started crying because he need some space and told her that. then when eh went past her at lunch he didnt say hi and she broke down crying. the other day she took pictures with one of her friends and she was in back and all u can see is her face and her bf didnt saything good about her because he could see anything except her face and she got mad about that. i have talked to her bf before and he told me that he dont really love her and all this other shit i have tryed tellin her this but she dont believe me so i dropped, but today i couldnt take her cryin so i topld her bf about it and he called her a drama queen and after he went and talked to her bc she was made bc she hate giving him space so he told her she dont have to. but i dont know what to do she is always like this and she cant give him space and i dont knwo what to do i mean she basically stalks the guy? plz helpe me thanks a lot!
anonymous -
She's a typical drama queen. What I'd suggest is you just straight out lay the facts out with her and talk to her about it. She needs to be confronted about it sooner or later, and besides, you're just a caring friend who's trying to look out for her. Tell her that her unacceptable behavior is driving people away from her out of annoyance. If she wants a serious relationship with a guy, she's gotta be serious herself and really grow up.
Most likely she is just insecure and thinks that everything has to be about her. If someone acts a certain way, she's going to think they're doing it cuz they don't like her or she did something wrong.
Be supportive and a friend to help her get through this, but first she's gotta realize that her over-dramatization is really affecting her life.
One of my friend's girlfriend was exactly like this. It got so bad that she cries over everything and almost lost her job at work. I mean, she assumes so many things about her boyfriend without knowing the real truth. Basically the problem is communication and ignorance.
Good luck.
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Me and my bf have been going out for a while now and his ex is trying to talk to him and acting like my friend then I have people telling she talks mess about me and wants to fight me.Well I'm not such an abusive person but I don't really know how to handle this.She keeps on trying to wear some really skanky clothes to impress him.He told me the way he feels about me already but I don't really know how to get this girl off his back. Please help!
anonymous -
First, to get rid of this girl, you need to understand where she is coming from. Most likely she is jealous that you're now with him, or if he dumped her, she could possibly feel insecure.
To get down to the real truth, go to the source. Ask her about it and approach the situation calmly. Don't go insulting her or pointing fingers or even get anyone else involved by mentioning names. Keep it between you two. Just lay out the facts and reassure her that you won't be mad if the rumors are true.
If she admits to it, ask her why. If it's cuz she's trying to win him back, tell her that it's over and the breakup happened for a reason. Even if they were to get back together, the same thing will happen anyways so there isn't any purpose for her to pursue something that will never be. Even so, she should be happy for him because he's found happiness, even if it is with you, not her.
If she denies it, tell the others to provide proof of her smack-talking.
Try not to let it get to you. You're happy with your boyfriend, and don't let anything get in the way of that.
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Hi. I have a really hard time getting over things that people do that emotionally hurt me, yet I mostly keep it all bottled inside of myself. I try to prevent opening up about it to the exact person if I feel it's uneccessary. In the meanwhile, I had in-laws of mine tell me things that they only said out of being helpful, or they just said something without thinking or not caring on how I would feel afterwards. They aren't necessarily being evil or spiteful people, yet it can seem that way to me at times. That's why I try to not really associate myself with them if I don't really have to. I do receive telephone calls from them from time to time and alot of times, I feel like I have to put on a front and act all happy to hear from them, when in actuality, I really don't want to talk to them at all (due to those things that they said to me, even if each thing that they say that hurts me is few and far between. I always remember it, which is becoming a huge problem for me). If you saw us together though, you'd think everything's all fine and dandy and have a beautiful relationship, but for a fact on my part, I'm being phony to spare their feelings and spare from being confrontational. How do I forgive someone for something they said, even though they didn't say sorry or better yet, someone who has no idea that I'm even bothered with them?
Thanks,
MrsRDeLove
MrsRDeLove -
Well, first off you have to admit that either you're overreacting or your in-laws have a horrible way of phrasing things.
What you must do to understand the situation is to realize that their intentions are good. They don't mean to purposely hurt you, so don't take it that way. If what they say has a double meaning and has the possibility of being hurtful, to find out what they really mean is to clarify what they say. Restate their dialogue in a different sense like, "Oh, so really, you're trying to say _______, right?"
This way you can avoid the dreaded confrontation and better understand what your in-laws are really trying to say. It's just a communication and problem of misunderstanding.
Hope this helps.
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My best friend is really rich and she always likes to brag about her $3.2 million mansion and how mine is only worth $1.2 million. I never really had a problem with her being so "Oh mine is better than yours" because shes done it with our cars, our clothes, etc. But its beginning to bug me because she wrote me this really long email about how she went to Hollister Co. and bought $3,000 worth of stuff. She began listing it one by one. 37 logo shirts ($721), 7 pairs of capris ($276)...and she listed it all the way to underwear, flip flops, mini skirts, shorts, bathing suits, and fragrance. Is that just a little too much? Because I think so. See my family is rich, but we like to save our money. But her family, blows it all on stuff they dont really need. Her $3,000 wardrobe will be thrown out when spring/summer is over. The email really bothered me...I'm not jealous. I can go to Hollister and spend a lot of $$ too. But, how can I teach her that money is not everything...and tell her she can save money while still looking great in all the latest fashion and styles?
anonymous -
I can understand where her boastfullness could be a problem, but it isn't your place to tell her what to blow her money on. Don't try and change her because most likely you'll end up unsuccessful. If she wants to blow that much money on clothes, let her learn the hard way what the value of a dollar is. If she doesn't, then she doesn't.
As for her boastfullness, if her friendship means a lot to you, just tell her to quit it. Tell her she's giving off a very bad impression. If you, her friend, notices this unacceptable behavior, then think of what strangers may think. She needs to clean up her act and stop bragging about her luxuries. Most likely she's insecure with herself that she has to brag to prove to others how rich and fabulous she is because it brings her the envy of others, which is a big ego boost for her. It's something called modesty, tell her to look into it.
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