Sweet_LiL_Angel's advice column

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Q: Okay, so, I'm young.
And no, it's SO not easy to lose weight, or, at least not for me.
I've been somewhat overweight all my life - in fact, the last time I was even relatively skinny, I was about 5 going into Kindgergarden, which is sad.
I don't even KNOW what it feels like to be that way.
I'm 13, going on 14 February 8th.
I've tried everything, diets, working out, even pills.
I really like this guy, and I wanna change to get more of his attention.
I also want to be like everyone else, and be healthy and happy, and actually not gag when I look in the mirror.
I don't really think I eat A LOT, I guess it's just what I eat and how much.
IF at all possible, I REALLY need a plan, diet rules and all that, because I. Am. Clueless.

I will owe you my life if you could help me at all.
PLEASEEE, Help.
I'd like fast results (ofcourse, we 13 year olds LOVE instant gratification) but seriously, before my 8th grade year is over and I start High School.

PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEEEE

Start now and don't cheat because you wont get the results you are looking for.

Exercising while on a diet helps lose weight quicker and helps tighten your stumuch etc. well. my mom did a diet that yo udont eat any dariy no milk, cheese, anything dairy, no bread, spaghetti,etc. fruit is good, veg.. hamburger with no bread or anything . etc. no junk food at all. do it for several weeks youll start to notice

Q: Ok, so I hope this doesnt sound too minor, because right now it is major to me.

One of my best friends went away to boarding school, so I don't see her very often at all. When she did live here last year full time, we still didnt see each other often because we went to different high schools and I live an hour and a half away. Anyway, my friends that are closer, well I hang out with them alot. And one time, she had a sleepover, and I wasnt allowed to go, because my dad said I had no way of getting back home, but I ended up staying over my other friend's who were closer's house, and my best friend was understandably offended. One of the people who I usually hang out, well, we like each other, and we're finally going on a date this sat. night. And this is supposed to be the date of all dates (the determining factor basically), and we've been planning it (well he) for two weeks. My best friend from boarding school just texted me and told me that me and my two other friends would be hanging out at her house on Sat. night since her bday was two weeks ago, and now she's down here. I had no idea she was coming, she just texted me! And I don't see her often (well, she is coming down for thanksgiving in two weeks), and I don't want her to be mad, because I'm hanging out with the guy. I know she won't understand that it's an important date, and he put alot of thought into it, I dont know what we're doing because he said its a surprise (so its that serious). But I don't want her to think I'm a bad friend. Help! should i postpone the date and hang out with my best friend, or should I go on the date, and just her when she comes back?

why don't you go on the date withh this boy and plan it kind of early in the afternoon and then go to her house afterwards. let her know that you aren't going to not come but you had plans and it's a pretty important date and he put so much thought into it. that way you can see them both.

Q: What songs are out there that have to do with a guy playing mind games with a girl?or a guy giving a girl mixed signals? either would do, i like all kinds of music, so theres no real preference. (checked google) but i can't find one,john lennon keeps coming up haha.

if you know any thanks :]!

Beyonce- If I were a boy

Q: Hi me and my bf have been dating for 3 years I LOVE HIM SOOO MUCH! Lately he has been going to his friends house like 4-5 times a week and drinking. Now I don't car if he goes out and has a good time I am just afraid that he is training his body into a filthy bad habbit. It's not like he gets HAMMMERED I just don't like his new routine. He will come to my house at like 1-3 am when the fun is over just to sleep with me. I love that he cares and is coming over I just prefer to spend quality time with him than him coming in the middle of the night. I have tried to tell him I don't like what he is doing and I think he is getting a little offensive. He is also an occosional smoker and obviously when he drinks I can only imagine he smokes much more than usual. I love him and I want a future with him. I am just afriad of what that future might be if he continues just "having fun" and not thinking about sereous things. He has a car and is planning on buying a house and is very responsible I'm just afraid that he might get into his fathers bad habbit of drinking. How can i get him to realise that his new habbits are starting to drive me crazy and depressed? All i think about is our future and how I don't want anything to change but he thinks that he just won't become an alcoholic or he thinks he can just quit smoking at any time. I love that he is so sure about himself but I am thinking more realisticly and I just want him to prove it to me!

i think you need to sit down and have a talk with him. let him know your feelings and that you dont mind him drinking with his buddys you just think hes doing it alittle to often. tell him trust his judgement but you dont want him to be getting into a habbit of it.

Q: so me and my boyfriend just started having (protected) sex. i was a virgin before, and we've done it like 3 times but the first time it didn't go all the way in, the second time it did go all the way in and it hurt but it was bearable. but the third time it hurt so bad i bled. will it get better? and is there any way to make it more comfortable for the time being?

thanks a ton =]

take it slow and luburcate it. lotin, spit anything to make it slide in easier and bleeding is because he poped your cherry.

Q: 15/f
i have a 4 year old brother. im scared of being a bad sister and scarring his views of me for life, but sometimes he is so annoying that i feel like really hurting him. when i explain he's being annoying he does the same thing any 4 year old boy would do... do it again.
it scares me and it makes me feel bad because i know he has no idea what hes doing wrong.

instead of hitting him what can i do to make him stop being annoying?

He just wants you to play with him. Give him some attention he looks up to you and wants you to like him. my son he will be 2 and if i dont answer him right away he gets mad and starts getting into trouble and i have to tackle him and tickle him.

Q: to lose weight, can i choose to just take in less calories instead of exercising?

my mom did a diet. with no dariy products or bread stuff like that like a hamburger but no cheese or bread and she lost a lot of weight doing . exercise helps and makes the procese go by faster.

Q: okay so i guess you could say i dont really like me life, not like in the whole i hate everyone suicide kinda way just that its like really .. boring? i wish my life could be so different, actually going out rather then sitting home for what feels like every single weekend.

so basically my question is how can i change things? Im 16 and i guess im shy. but just tell me anything i could do to change things, i mean literally anything and how to go about doing it

thanksssss

ah i used to be this way as well. a job helps you with getting out if you already have one try talking to everyone you work with get to know them a little your job is like your second home unless you totally hate it. parks, school events and so forth.

Q: well,..i spent some time with my ex-boyfriend on saturday..*sighs* well he just up & left me last year without warning& moved in with his wife& kid in las vegas(they were separated for the 5 years we were together)..well, it was very hard for me..well I didn't know how to act around him i was very nervous and didn't know how to act like myself..he stepped outside twisce while i was with him this weekend to call his wife and that just made me feel really bad, bad for her and bad for me.You must know that i was with him for 5 years, he was still technically married but they lived in separate states and he never wore his wedding ring. Now with all that has happend i still have this glimmer of hope. I still love him soo much and now i feel horrible in side..kind of like empty and what the hell is wrong with me..what am i to him..why did he want to see me? what am I to him? i want to ask him but i'm afraid that it's going to cause un-easiness for both of us..HE TOLD ME IF I COULD WAIT HE KNOWS WE HAVE A FUTURE..if he loved his wife would he have seen me,would he have said what he said to me.. i can't help but wonder, he says he doesn't love her hes just with her for his son, but i don't know if he's just saying that cuz he doesn't want to hurt me? i don't know..he also told me to let him know when..also he wanted me to go to this family get together with him (the wife wasn't going to go) becasue his family really likes me, and they have told me that they like me for him better than her because she's violent to her son..comments like that make me wonder, and i have hope that he still wants to be with me that he's just with her for the kid but ..i don't know what do you think?do you think he still cares for me?...i don't know how i feel..i want to call him and talk about this a little bit but i don't know if i should wait for him to call me.what do you think about all this?

You need to talk to him at first while i was reading this i was wondering why you are putting your self throuw this than i mean him bringing you up to his family makes me think he really does care. Honestly if he loves you than he will be able to sit down and talk to you anot this. its a big situation and you shouldnt have to put your life on hold for someone you love.

Q: 15/f

I'm really, really worried.

I know I'm only 15, but a few weeks ago I noticed that my left breast was persistently hurting and aching, and that the area around the outside of my breast and my armpit seemed thicker than usual, and slightly swollen.

The pain went away after about five days, but during the last week it's come back. At the moment, the whole breast feels very tender and painful, and at times it feels like there's stabbing pains in it. Also, the outer side and armpit of the breast is still slightly swollen.

It's really worrying me. I even got my mum to check if she could feel anything, but she said she couldn't.

Does this sound like cancer?
What should I do?
x

Nope. Your Breasts are growing. Breast cancer you will feel a lump. if truely worried you can talk to your doctor. but most likely they are just getting bigger. (unless you are pregnant?)

Q: im scared to talk to my school psychologist. help?

I am not sure why you need to talk to one. but don't be afrid they are to trust at first but they want to help you if you dont feel comfortable with the one you are seeing tell them ou want a different one. and you dont have to talk unless you really need to. good luck

Q: my best friend, who i've known since i was 5 years old, is pretty much ditching me because it's her last year of highschool. i'm 16.i mean,i know shes having fun with all her senior friends,but i feel like she likes her new friends better and doesn't care for me anymore. i'm always the one calling her, always the one there for her. every time we hangout, its ALWAYS her friends hanging out with us! its NEVER just me and her, and if by some chance it is, its just different. I feel like i've lost a part of me, but i don't know what to do! She got mad at me because i didn't hangout with her one time,when she's always the one blowing me off. she makes me feel like its my fault. I'm like the friend she hangs out with when she has no one else, and i'm sick of it. but theres also that fact that I've known her for 11 years. I honestly think we're taking different paths in our lives. I'm so sad and confused, and angry all at the same time =[. My question is what should i do about this whole mess? last time we talked we were mad at eachother.I've felt this way for so long.she makes me feel like crapp. Should i confrount her about all of this or just leave it like i have? ANY help on thiss would be grand,and thanks

You and your friend are both going to be taking seprate paths. I am going to explain my situation to you so you understand a little bit better. its a little different but, my best friend and I have known each other for ever. and i had got pregnant at 15 (17 now) she moved to the city where i orginally was from her parents moved there so her and i could live closer she started a new school made new friends i went to another school had other friends i didnt like her friends she didnt like mine we are always there for each other and we still talk about things ecspecially major things in life. i moved to missouri and shes in ohio and we will still always be friends. let her now you will always be there for her. you just arnt going to be hanging uot 24.7 but your not losing a friend you two are just growing up.

Q: So the topic is my favorite hobby, and I decided to do reading. Other than favorite book, anyone else have any good ideas on what to add?

you feelings toward that favorite book, why you like reading, why its your hobby, what kind of books you like to read, why they are you favorite. what goes throw your mind while reading your favorite book. good luck.

Q: HI, My sister and her ex boyfriend are fighting for custody of my neice. My neice has been staying with me so she can attend school. Now my neices father didn't know where i lived until he involved the sherriffs dept. Her father is know for his temper and has a girlfriend who has threatened my sister and her husband. The sherriff has granted me custody of my neice until tomorrow.. but i am fearing going home and doing any normal activites because of the violent threats. What should i do?

I am sure since he as involed the police dept that he wont do anything stupid before and hopefully after court. I dont think you have anything to worry about but contact the police and make a record of anything he or this girlfriend does.

If you are really worried about it maybe take your niece out. dinner, the park, the movies, something to get both of your minds off of things for a few hours.

Q: 18/f, VIRGIN.
well me and my boyfriend have been going out for a while, i love him to death and i'm definately ready to have sex. anyways the problem is we can't do it at either of our houses, our parents are ALWAYS home and neither of us have a lock on our doors, plus it would just be weird knowing parents are in the house. so my boyfriend was like if either of them don't leave somewhere we can do it in my car. i just laughed and was like oh god and he was like it will be hot :) i'm not sure how i feel about this, i don't think it should matter where but it's my first time you know. and where i live, the high temp is around 30 degrees at night which is cold. what im asking is what sex is like in a car. he has a ford explorer, so it's not like that little and i'm also worried about it being cold! well thanks, any stories or experiences would help!

Oh my gosh you don't need to google it and it is exciting and stuff. My fiance and I pull down this path into the woods its not far back but good enough and its dark we turn the car off but have it so the music is playing and lean both seats back. and have sex right in the passanger seat i think it is so hot and he loves it. (put a blanket in the back seat or somewhere close for when you are done to cover up with but during sex you dont even think about the coldness. its right before and right afterwards. (we lean both seats because sometimes we hold each other in the seat when were being all romantic but when were you no having sex rough we sit in our own seat out of breath.

Q: i told a guy that i like him and hee says he likes another girl but im still sexy i really want him do i wait or move on?
thanks
loveboys

Move On. You don't need to wait for someone. plenty of "fish" in the "sea"

Q: I am 13/boy. i dated ths girl for two years an idk i actually loved her i think. we would hang out all the time,and just hav a blast. after her tho i just started dating random girls. i meen i know them but i use to date girls for there personality,now i date them for there asses.idk what to do( the girl i love is datig my best friend )

get out of the dating thing for a little while because your gonna get hurt acting like that. your feelings for this girl you love is driving you crazy and its driving you more crazy that she is dating your best friend. am i right? well quit dating for a while you are 13 years old you have plenty of time to worry about the subject. focus on your friends , school, family. dont worry or think about this girl for awhile. find a good hobby sports, video games anything. good luck

Q: ok. i have a crush...it's kind of stupid and very high school (which, btw, i am, he's not) and i know he has big things to focus on right now...that aren't me. i feel like i've been clinging though and we've been like friends for a couple years. i don't want to mess that up. just to talk to him (cuz i hardly get to see him anymore) i'll message him on myspace and then realize how pathetic i'm sounding about pretty pointless subjects. how can i keep talking to him without sounding like...you know...i just want to talk to him? how can i keep being a good friend to him without him getting that i might be thinking something more? :( he is a really good friend to me. i don't want to jeopardize it.

set your feelings aside and talk to him as a friend to whom someone you look up to. ask how hes doing whats he doing dont act flirty well maybe a little but not alot.

Q: hellooo :) i have a good friend, he is a guy. he is 16 turning 17, i just turned 18. so a couple months ago he came over when everyone at my house was gone. my shades in my room were closed because before he was over i took a nap, and just never opened them up. we just layed in my bed and watched tv. well then my 21 year old brother walked in the house, and i didn't want him to suspect anything so i went out in the living room to talk to him and he was like whose here? and i was like joe. and he was like oooOoooh ;) i just brushed it off, like whatever. well now he always bugs me about it. if i say im texting him he will be like oh you "boyfriend" joe. he has a girlfriend, obviously im not going to do anything with him and my brother knows he has a girlfriend. i was like don't you have a GIRL best friend and he was like yeah, and i was like exactly and he was like but we dont lay in my bed with the blinds shut. i was like ok seriously whatever its so annoying to have to hear that from him! he even got my family involved. i try to act like it doesn't bother me when he teases me about it, but it does. whenever his name is mentioned, my brother will bring up that situation. is there anything i can do? anything i can say to my brother? oh i've never had an actual boyfriend either. thanks.

Honestly just tell him it really bothers you and do it in a time he isnt mentioning it. bring it up like. you know every time you hear joe's name and you bring up that one time. i find it very annoying and i really would like if you could please stop. He picks on you because your his little sister.

Q: we say it, we mean it in different ways. their are many different reasons to why we love something or someone. can i get your guys input on what i love you to a significant other means (boyfriend and girlfirend) (husabnd or wife) NOT friend to friend or anything.

also what bascially love means to you.

please think hard and answer both questions thank you.

I love my fiance and my son more than life it's self. Love is a word that many people throw around. It needs to be used more carefully. First time i said I love you to my fiance we were in a romantic setting he placed his hand on my cheek and stared me right in the eyes and told me that he loved me and i just new he truely ment it and he says it the same way till this day. its a feeling and you may have said i love you to someone and they said it back but when they truely mean it your get this feeling in your stumoch and in your heart and your kisses are like you spinning and your not even touching the ground. hope my input helped whatever kind of answers you are looking for

bio

My name is Ashley. I am 22 years old. Ill be celebrating my 3rd 21st birthday June :) . I had my first child at 15. I got married at 18 and had another child shortly after. They have two different fathers. I am currently going threw a divorce. I moves states after we seperated ( ugly seperation) but I had no family in that state. I left everything except my beautiful babies and our clothes. I found a job up north and things are going good. I am dating. I have been in abusive situations. I am going to college for psychology and sociaology. Im here to listen help and give you advice ive been in alot of different situations and can relate to a lot.