Sweet_LiL_Angel's advice column

askSweet_LiL_Angel

advice column ask question view feedback favorite columnist advicenators

Q: Alright so i have a boyfriend, and we have been dating for over nine months. We have been sexually active and i want to stop, but he doesnt. What are some things i should say to him or tell him to convince him not to do it anymore? We dont do it that much anymore, but i just want to stop completely.
Whats your advice?
Thanks.

just tell him you honestly dont want to anymore like the other person who answered your question said. if he truely loves you he will understand and wait until your ready.

Q: If you were in a relationship, or otherwise 'involved' with someone in some way, and a good friend had a crush on you, would you want to know? Or would you rather they kept it to themselves.

I'd love really honest opinions.

Id rather not know it may bring complications to your current relationship.

Q: ok so i wanna have sex tonight.
but im supposed to get my period.
i wont have sex on my period cuz thats nasty.
but im asking like can i get my period while having sex? cuz that might also be awkward.
pleasee answer asap.
thankss!

yes you can definatly start your period while having sex it happened to me. at first i thought he just made me bleed.

Q: it's actually really complicated, i'm not a player.. i can promise you that. there's rarely a time where i play people. this is kinda different, i don't know what is going on in my mind.

my best friend and i had a thing before, but apparently we haven't gotten over our 'thing' yet. cause, i still like him.. and he still likes me. so i'm kind of stuck in between my boyfriend and my best friend. the thing is about my boyfriend, he can rarely go out.. and talk on the phone. but we see each other at school at the time, so what worries me is that.. what if every break comes up.. like a 3 week break or month break or something? i can't stand to not see my boyfriend for 2 weeks... because i start loosing feelings from there, hey i can't control my feelings. and most of the time, i hang out with my best friend. and my best friend acts more like a boyfriend than my actual boyfriend does. my actual boyfriend doesn't do much, i'm the person who wears the pants in the relationship... i always call.. but he sometimes never picks up.

the thing is, my best friend is probably thinking that i'm using him for things i'm not getting from my current boyfriend. but i'm not, i know it's not right... but i don't know why i keep doing it. i don't ever let anybody get into my relationships, i don't know why i let him get into my relationship. i feel alot more comfortable with my best friend than i do with my current boyfriend, because i don't know much about my current boyfriend (he's shy). me and my best friend can talk for hours and stuff, but my current boyfriend.. the longest time i talked to him was for 30 minutes, that's because i forced him to stay on the phone. -_____-" i don't know what to do, my best friend wants to talk to me tonight about something... i'm guessing it's bad, so i might have to choose my boyfriend or him. loose one and gain one.

i don't know what to do, help me please! btw, my current boyfriend is super sensitive because his last girlfriend and him had a bad break up, i'm basically his first girlfriend since his last girlfriend used him to get to someone else. and i don't want to hurt any of them..

i don't wanna loose neilsen, but yet.. i don't know.

i still would stay friends with both of them, if i could.... please help! ASAP!

Tell your current boyfriend how you feel. How only seeing him at school isn't working out for you. Tell him about winter break or whatever and how you wont be able to see him. As for your best friend i would really think about it. you could lose a beat friend over a relationship but if you truely feel like you have some hard feeling for him go for it. you never no but remember if this don't work out as planned you may lose him as a friend and tell him that if you feel it may happen

Q: ok well i have been with this guy and this is the same one i had problems with on my last question, but things had gotten better but now are getting worse and im tired of it i think i shouldnt have to be so angry all the time and wonder if im important to him i need a guy who will show me and treat me like i am so i am thinking of calling it off i just dont know exactly how to break up with him i mean we have been through alot and i care for him i dont want to hurt him but at the same time i need to just move on i still wanna be his friend though:( and advice would help at this point because im so lost and i know this break up will hurt me to

Just tell him, I know we have been throw a lot and things had started to get better but they are just getting worse again and i really want us to still be friends but i dont think us dating each other is working out for ether of us.

Q: Okay so lately I've been screwing up alot of stuff and I want to make my parents proud of me. Tonight I blew out the tire on our car from hitting a curb (I till have my permit) and even though my mom tried to say it wasn't completly my fault because that curb sticks out, it still makes me feel horrible. I also don't have a job but I'm trying so hard to get one, it's not like I just don't care. I'm sick of using their money and I want to be able to pay for my own stuff. It's so hard to be 16 and find a job where I live, I've applied to at least 10 different stores. I'm also trying to cut down on drinking and eliminate smoking (both kinds- i dont do either often at all though) because I feel deceitful. Finally, I want to spend more time with my family. I'm planning on going to the movies with them on Friday. I need some advice on how to manage/make all of this work, I've never felt this bad about anything I've done until tonight. I'm 16/f, & thank you :)

maybe try a family game night or movie night at your house with some popcorn or something. keeping the house clean and doing a lot of the chores relieves a lot of stress on your parents. Little things around the house maybe cook dinner for everyone. stuff like that.

Q: well today this boy told me he was in love with me...he said he fell in love with me as soon as he saw me...that was so shocking idk what to do and i dont know how to face him at school monday knowing this...i dont like him like that and he knows i just think he doesnt get it...what do i do im only 14 and i never been in this situation...i mean he's a great guy he's smart and he knows how to treat me...but idk...please help me!!!

Just let him know you aren't looking for a relationship at the moment. That you find the two of you better off being friends.

Q: How do you cope with your life when 80 percent of your friends have decided to just smoke weed all the time? Half of what they even talk about is weed and drugs in general. I'm not an idiot so I'm not going to try it, but how do you deal when your social life is in shambles because I refuse to hang out with them when there are drugs involved?

17/m

17/f
I went through that and i was the idiot that tryed it. Most everyone does try it but there are also plenty of people whom smoke it and dont let it run their life. Plenty of people who dont smoke it. you just have to associate your self with those people. Reason I quit smoking was the people i was hanging out with who let it run their life were doing nothing with their lifes and some became abusive. I have a child and weed is a good way to have my child taken away. You can have a lot going for you in your life. drop the old friends (be there if they need you to talk to or something important) but find people you can relate to. good luck.

Q: 17/f in a relationship of 1 year...
yes... not too long but i love this kid to death...
and i want to support him in anything he pursues as a career... but he wants to be, a cop. something i'm kind of against... i really dont know why. it's a great job, but *sigh* that whole risking your life thing isnt really working for me... me and my boyfriend have ARGUMENTS over this... i just dont know what to do? Back off? keep telling him to not do it? ='/ ... it's his life, but GAHHH i'm just so confused...
he feels the same on me joining the marine corps, which is why i decided not too... also b/c of my parents... someone please shed some light on this for me?

You may not like the idea but if this a career he wishes to take some interest in let me. its something he really wants to do.

Q: ok well i need get on the pill. no i am not sexually active nor do i plan on it soon. I do know that I am 14 and ready to start dating. I know how strong of a person i am and i know that i may not be able to say no to my bf when he wants to have sex. I will always have a condom on me and thought about female condoms. but i think well know that i want to be on the pill. i live in il if that helps! I just dont know what to do where to go whom to got to or anything so yeah. any advice is well appricated!

free clinics

Q: i am redoing my room and i want to put posters all over my walls. But i listen to screamo and metal and some oldies. So were could i get some posters that fits those genres of music?

you can get them at music stores or like hot topic.

Q: How do I talk to my parents about sex and purity? Whenever I bring somthing up with my dad he gets mad at me and with my mom it just gets akward. What can I do? I want to stay pure till marrige, Im thinking about getting a purity ring just as a reminder whenever it starts to go to far with a boy. How can I bring up a conversation with my parents. I have a little sister(11) if that helps at all. Thanks in advance!

try your mom first. akward but shes been through it since you are both females. Tell her like, Mom, before this gets to akward i just want to say that i want to safe my self until marriage but i was a purity ring to remind me of what i want rather than being pressured into something. then let her know you want to ask some questions if itd be okay .. and parents tell each other everything she will tell your dad and you wont have to worry about that lol he gets bad because your his daughter.

Q: ok, i broke up in july and my new bf broke up with his ex 3 weeks back. we just started out. everything's great. we hang out together alot. i have started to know his friends. we haven't made out yet. the problem : whenever we are on the phone, i just dont know what to talk about. i juat stay quiet!! like today we were talking and it was him who was blabbering and then he, like, stops and tells me..."why are you so quiet" ughhh...maybe i haven't opoened up to him. or maybe its becaus i dont want this one to turn out like my previous one...idk...i feel like a complete idiot. any ideas? also he is 2 years younger than me. and he is a sweetheart.

i used to be the same way tell him little things about you at a time. ask him questions about him self, favorite food, song, music, movie, candy, soda, all ton of stuff. get to know him more and once you know and trust him youll be able to open up to him and dont be shy about saying or asking something . my boyfriend asked me to " pull his finger" at wal mart today lol. were very open now.

Q: Iam always late for school becouse my cousin who is autistis dosn't want to get ready in the mornings so iam always late no matter how early I get up how can i get him to want to get ready in the mornings so I can be there on time?

Maybe make it some sort of game show him it is fun to get ready for school

Q: if you have a warrant out for your arrest. and you dont go to jail, what does that mean?
can they show up to your work?

the person whom answered this below me is correct but depending on why you got arrested unless its a pretty serious matter than they will wait until you get a speeding ticket, or charged with another crime if you do a crime and try and hide it from you. a police officer can't hold you on a charge but they can dig in your past if they see you have a warrent they can hold you on that.

Q: My very best friend is not the same...he became a person i dont know anymore...weve known eachother for 8 months weve become really close he became the bestest friend i have never had...only it feels he threw me away for another..yes it's a girl who i cannot stand we have never ever been friends and she totally wont give up and right now she has won i just can't seem to understand i have tryed to talk to him and spend more time with him...i dont wanna lose him but what more can i do...he'll leave me for her when were right in the middle of a convo and this makes me soo angry and upset and all my girlfriends say "dont let it bother you" or "make friends with another boy" it's not easy he is my best friend and i cant let this go so right now iam thinking should i be more like her?? or what??? i dont know i dont know i dont know PLEASE HELP!!!!! Thank you sooo much!!!

It sounds to me as if you have a crush on him? if i amm wrong sorry. give him some time and dont push him maybe he really likes this girl and if you two are truely just friends than maybe you should try and like this girl get to know her a little. if its that you have a crush on him tell him.

Q: fifteen/female'

I fall for guys way too fast,
and what I mean by "fallin for' em"
I start to like them they move on I'm stuck here liking them, and I get crushed ect;

rate 5ives g00d or bad (;

you wont understand how to fix this until you are REALLY hurt by a guy to where he puts you through depression. unless you sit down and think about stuff. a few qualities you are looking for in a guy a few things that will make him special to you. you don't need a boyfriend stay single for a while and wait for someone to come along

Q: Okk so I am a senior in high school and i'm starting to think abotu what i want to major in next year. But i have no clue what i want to be.

I really love kids (except i deffinatly don't want to be a teacher)...i was thinking like social worker or something like that.

Can anyone PLEASE give me some job ideas, or major ideas (not necessarily involving kids). I'm not a science person btw...hhah

Thanks so much in advanced!!

starting with your general studies will give you extra time to think about your major and i went through the same thing you are going through. Honestly I picked social worker and that's what im majoring. but you have to be able to deal with the parents! the abusive ones whom are going to FREAK when you have to remove their child or children.

Q: i have this friend who is 2 years younger than me (i'm a senior in high school, she is a sophomore) and we constantly fight.. sometimes we'll go 2 weeks without it but other times it's every other day. she made a huge mistake in the past and she knows it and we haven't been the same since.. and now we try so hard to keep this relationship together. but so many times we question whether it's worth it. we try to take breaks or say we aren't friends but it never works because neither one of us can last without the other. but now she has admitted to knowing she's an awful friend to me and always has to confess to something. i'm so tired of being hurt by her and having to forgive her... and i really just want to say we shouldn't be friends and stick to it, but i know i can't stay strong to that. but how do i deal with this? how can i get her to finally realize what she is doing to me and to stop? thank you for any help

you dont always have to be together or know everything about each other. i mean if you really want to make your friendship last than be there for her.

Q: I'm 15/F and I like a 17/M and he likes me. He is really shy but he drinks and I am not into that. Advice?

Ask your self simple questions. Does he smoke when he drinks? is he abusive when he drinks? is he a flirt when he drinks? if he is a calm drinking and does it once in awhile with the guys why should it bother you?

bio

My name is Ashley. I am 22 years old. Ill be celebrating my 3rd 21st birthday June :) . I had my first child at 15. I got married at 18 and had another child shortly after. They have two different fathers. I am currently going threw a divorce. I moves states after we seperated ( ugly seperation) but I had no family in that state. I left everything except my beautiful babies and our clothes. I found a job up north and things are going good. I am dating. I have been in abusive situations. I am going to college for psychology and sociaology. Im here to listen help and give you advice ive been in alot of different situations and can relate to a lot.