Dear Readers:
I think my life experience is what qualifies me to write this column. I made every mistake imaginable. But have learned from them. Most important I still remember what it was like to be 12, 13, 14, 15, and so on. Currently I am a single mom, I have two wonderful boys. One in college. We are all happy emotionally. We love life, and know that you can too. I try to be the kind of parent that understands. I know that I can help you to understand where you parents are coming from, and help you get over the difficulties of being young. You can even have your parents write to me and I will help them to get over their fears and at least respect you and your feelings. I have been married and divorced twice, so I have experience in that field also. But now I own my own home, and my own business and am successful. Lots of luck to you! Hope to hear from you.
Website: Ask Michele
E-mail: cobweb2@comcast.net
Gender: Female
Location: Connecticut
Occupation: accountant, internet marketing, creative writing
Age: 56
Member Since: March 22, 2005
Answers: 1331
Last Update: June 20, 2010
Visitors: 84181
Main Categories:
Work/School Relationships
Families
Parenting
View All
|
| |
ok this is a long one.
i dont know where to start so i might scatter, when i turned 8 my mom moved away from my dad a said we could not see him for awhile (another long story so dont ask why just accept it) my sis and i were crushed my dad was like bill cosby we spent our summers with him he did everything with us theres no telling where we would have been if the events would have been diffrent. so our whole lives we told each other that when we turn 18 we would find him. my dad had remarried and had a wonderful new wife (she was so good i called her mom) and she had a great son. the last summer we spent together was when i was 8 my brother was 3 that summer he choked on some ice, i had just took cpr lessons at camp so i gave him the hymlec and he survied.in 1996 i was 16/17 and my mom said we could talk to my dad so she called my dads family only to hear them say they are so sorry to hear what happened and asked why we werent at the funeral my mom didnt get it. she ask what what happen. so my cousin break the news she say pappa(thats what they called my dad) killed my stepmom and my little brother i was in total shock i could not breath 2months earlier my boyfriend died in front of me.and to get this news it was the worse. he stab my stepmom 66times and broke my brothers head against the kitchen floor. after he did that he cut his throat drank drano cut his wrist and and stabbed his self in the stomach and drug the knife up to his ribs. He claimed he was insane and even the prosicuters thearpise said he was insane. my question is what am i to do? can i forgive or what i love him he is my dad we have the same eyes when i look into the mirror i see him should i no is it possible for me to forgive him? my sis has been in contact with him for awhile and we came down for one of his trials 2day i saw him. i thought that if i looked into his eye then i could see the truth i had was anger inside i wanted to let him have it. but i chickened out should i scream and yell would it help me or what should i do?pls i need help (link)
|
Hi Honey,
This is such an awful thing for you to face, and I am sorry for you loss. I know you said that you loved your step mom and your step brother and even saved his life. It is especially tragic. Your father is also a tragic figure, and if you knew him and loved him, and if he never behaved that way before, then I would believe that the therapist are probably right, and he did go insane. Sicknesses like schizophrenia show up late in life. So it is possible. And that means that in the eyes of the law he was not aware of his actions, but that may not mean that he will get out of prison. But if they keep him on his medication for the rest of his life, he may be able to think straight again and may you can have a relation ship with him. I don't mean that you will be able to live with him and be a family, most likely they will have to keep him in prison. But you will be able to write to each other and eventually visit him if you want to. When your father's head clears on the medication he will feel awful about what he did. And while forgivness for his acts only can come from God, that does not mean that you cannot have compassion for him and be his daughter. Anyone would understand. There are people in prison for all kinds of awful reasons, and the only people who do have contact with them are members of their family. Here is my suggestion, find out as much as you can about the situation. I'll bet you can even find news articles about it in the on-line version of the newspaper in the town that he was living when the tragety happened. Make up your mind whether or not you believe that he was in sane when he committed the murders. If he was, and if the oourts finds him insane, then you can decide if you want to forgive him and nave contact with him. Your first letter does not have to be about the trageties. Let him write about that to you, let him bring it up. He will most likely agree that he behaved badly and want your forgivness and understand. If you find that he has no remorse for his actions, then that is a different story. And you can decide not to have contact with him. So I think you should extend the first gesture of contact with him through a letter and see what happens. Hey if you miss him, and the times you spend together, then that is what you start with, because most likely he misses them too.
I hope this helps.
MIchele
|
|
you probly think im being silly but im not its the truth and it really hurts, im just gonna come out and say it, my mum doesnt love me and im being serious she says she hates me but perhaps she doesnt she might like me but there is no mother love there she talks to my sisters mates more then she talks to me and when she does talk to me she just nags at me and yells i dont have any bond with her and it hurts me when i think about it i know she loves my sister cause she shows her love she buys her everything but that aint even the problem i mean i dont mind if she would rather spend her money on my sister its just that she never hugs me or helps me threw things when im upset when im ill i cry in my room on my own i wish it wasnt true i sometimes block it out and just say to myself that im being silly and its not true, but then some small little thing will triger it off again like it i see my mum hugging my sister or something like that my mum never takes me anywhere and she wil never talk to me about anything i feel alone even when im with a load of people i just feel alone inside all i want is my mum to show me some love sometimes to hugg me some days to hold my hand when im ill and to show me she is really my mum and not some stranger i no this sounds stupid and dont laff but sometimes i cry in my bed and put my arms around me and pretend it my mum telling me everything is alright :( i think its time i faced up to the truth (link)
|
Hello Honey,
It sounds like you are really upset, and I don't blame you. A mother is a very important person in a young persons life, and you are right she should be showing you some love and affection and helping you with problems that you may have, and you should be able to talk to her about anything. I am so sorry that you don't have that. It is not fair. There is something wrong with your mother. I can't say why she is neglectful of you. I know that I couldn't do that to my kids. I have two boys. And I know sometimes one might think that I love the other more, but really it's because one is four years older, and he has more privildges and freedom, well he's in college, and I hardly ever see him any way. But inside they know that I love them both. Many of us have grown up knowing that our moms were not the loving perons you see in the KOdaK commercials on TV. That's what used to get to me when I was young. Those Kodak commercials made me cry because they were nothing like what my family was. It was hard and I spent to many years being wounded because my mother didn't love me. I had a whole in me that I could never fill. Then I had some therapy but not until I was in my 30's. I learned that my mother was the one with the problems, and I was going to have to be the "parent" to the little child in me who never had a loving mother. It was hard, but I did it, and I have a normal life now. And I have two boys and I love them to death, and we all love each other very much. I didn't want to be a mom like the one I had. That may be the best you can hope for, but it can be a wonderful thing. There is a book that I read. It was given to me in therapy. I will never forget it. It started me on the road to healing. It was called Toxic Parents. It is an old book, if you can find a copy it won't be expensive. You will find that the book will explain that it is not your fault if your parents (mother) does not have the emotional strenght to raise you with love. She is the one with the problem. You don't have one yet, in fact you are smart enough to know that there is something wrong, and you can't help but blame yourself, because every message we get from TV, magazines, and the world around us, is that our mother must love us and if she doesn't then there must be something wrong with us. Right? WRONG. It is not you it is your mother. The answer is, I guess, is to not look for an answer, look for strenth to be the mother to your inner child. I hope this helps honey. You deserve better. If you grow up and stay strong and have confidence in your own worth and value yourself, you will find someone one day who will cherish you.
Michele
|
Hey it's Sam. You prob. don't remember me but I wrote to you before about all my "families" and how I was going to try and get to my friends. Well anyways even if you don't it doesn't really matter...but when I was going to my friend's I met a bunch of kids who were doing the same shit I've been doing. We had like this hang out where kids would just show up use and then leave. It was great. But then things started to get bad. At first I loved it but then I started to think about it. I called my friend to let her know I was ok but I think I just scared her. Well I tried to stay in touch with her but I needed to sell the phone for drug money. Things just kept getting worse there so I ran away. I feel like a coward all I seem to do is run. Well I ran and now I'm here and It's better than the other place. Me and a few other girls are here we get all the drugs we want and sometimes we have access to the phone and the computer (obviously)but we have to work. I feel so dirty. I feel like I don't want to do this anymore but I don't know what else to do. I've thought about calling my friend but I don't know if she would even want to be my friend anymore after all the things I've done. I wouldn't blame her I wouldn't take me back. I just feel so confused. I ran away to get away from guys who beat me and violate me and now I'm doing it for money. I don't understand what's wrong with me. I don't want to be doing this but for some reason I just seem to escape it. Do you have any idea what's wrong with me? I'm so lost. I know that it's my fault that I'm here and I brought this on myself but is there any way that I could make it stop. I think that if I knew exactly what to do I could do it. I just feel like there's nothing in front of me and I'll be stuck doing things that I hate and that I'm afraid to do forever. I know you recommended those house things do you think they would really help me even though I've done all those horrible things? I mean I'm really screwed up. I don't even know what day or time it is hald the time. I'm so afriad to keep living and I don't want to be anymore. I want help but I'm afraid to get it. I'm afriad of what will happen if I try to get help and fail or even if I succeed. I feel so out of place. I'm here with 3 other girls. I'm the youngest one here I'm 14 now and I don't even remember my birthday. Do you think that my friend would take me back or that place would take me in? Please help me I really don't know what to do. Thank you for your help.
Sam (link)
|
HI Sam,
Of course I remember you. And I am glad that you took the time to write to me even though your time on the computer is limited. I do hope you get to read my answer. YOu may be surprised to know that your friend Lauren wrote to me also. She told me about the phone call that you made. Sam, Lauren is very worried about you and I KNOW that she would take you in. But I'll deal with that later. I understand why you are there. You had to go somewhere and these people were willing to take you in and provide you with what you need, food and shelter. I a glad that there are some othe girls there for you to be with. But you are right in thinking that this option is not a permanent one and the longer you stay, the longer will be your climb out. It is not too, late, it is never too late, it will just become harder. DOn't make it harder on yourself. YES< YES
|
|
Me and my bf have been going out 4 three months he just found out something bad about a family member and its been making him really angry. I understand how he feels but he takes all of his anger out on me! Last nite he was being such a jerk we almost broke up he tells me he loves me all the time but idk if its true. im only 14 but how can i talk to him without bringing up anything thats going to hurt him? (link)
|
Bad things happen to all of us during ourlives. That is life, there is not way to stop it, but it is NOT OK to take it out on the people we are close to, and supposed to be in love with. But it happens all the time dear. If you don't like it,and I don't blame you, then get out. If this is how he acts now, and you are only 14, what is life with him going to be like when you are adults and have real problems or your own problems to deal with. It is not OK to act that way. I know you don't want to be alone, but do you want to be beaten up all the time, for stuff that you did not do and have no control over. You'll wish you were alone when life turns out like that. Find a nice kid, who knows the deal. Life happens. Fix what you can, and forget what you cannot.
Michele
|
|
ok say you go get tested and they say you have herpes, how will they know if the herpes was from giving someone head or if it was from air borne herpes(which is when u can get it just by breathing in the air) or if it was from switching saliva. like by sharing drinks.. whats the difference.. and if u go get tested and you have herpes how can they tell which one you have..???? (link)
|
There is herpes simplex and herpes 2 or herpes one and two. Herpes one is a cold sore on your mouth. herpes 2 is genital herpes. I know of only one way to get genital herpes and that is through intercourse. But I have met people who swear they got genital herpes from having oral sex with someone who had a cold sore. I have NEVER heard of anyone getting herpes from the air. Herpes is a virus it lives in humans. It cannot survive in the air. It would be dead in seconds. I know that if a mom has active genital herpes when she gives birth to a baby,that baby could get the virus in it's eye and go blind So when moms are giving birth if they have active herpes, then she has to have a C-Section. So perhaps you could get herpes from saliva if the person has active lesions of cold sores on their mouth. I also know people who have gotten cold sores from kissing a person with cold sores. Having cold sores does NOT mean that you have gential herpes or will get them. If you have a cold sore, well you know it, and you don't have to get tested. If you have a painful sore in your genital area, then you should get it tested so that you will know for sure if you have herpes or not. Yes you can get herpes from having oral sex with some who has active sores on their genital area.
Hope this helps
Michele
|
It seems like a stupid question but what's the best thing to do when you're trying to lose weight.
Eat before you work out or after? (obviously not right before or right after)
It's just a couple of people have told me eating before will give me energy and that eating after will just bring back the calories and other people have told me eating after is better because before you already have the energy from your previous meals of the day and if you eat after you'll get all the sugar, protein, etc. back that you lost during sweating.
So, who's right? (link)
|
It does not matter when you eat. I have taken many courses in nutrition. It is overall calorie intake and overall calorie burning. If you eat more calories than you burn each day you will gain weight. if you burn more calories that you take in each day, you will loose weight. Wether or not you eat before you work out is a personal preference. Some people cannot work out if they are hungry, others cannot work out after they have just eaten. Read labels and see what your calorie intake is. Many foods fool you into thinking they are healthy and low in calories when in fact they are not. I hope this helps
Michele
|
|
Hi, i just turned 18 and i live in Pennsylvania. im not really sure wut changes take place according to law such as having to get my own health insurance and wut not. can anyone explain more to me? (link)
|
Well, PA's law may be a little different,but you are not old enough to vote, and to join the armed forces (big deal). As far as your own health isurance,you can stay on your parents health insurance usually until you are 19, and 23 if you are a full time college student. And if that is not an option, look for a full time job that provides medical insurance. My son goes to a state college here in CT and he is a full time student, and the state provides his medical insurance for a lot less than it would cost me, so the college/state is covering his medical right now. At 18, you will also be tried as an adult for a crime and the crime will go on your permanent records, and will follow you everywhere. Juvenilles criminal records are sealed, in most cases. Well, you also legally don't need your parents permission any more to do just about anything. You are legally an adult, and are expected to be responsible for yourself. So you also need money and brains and a positive attitude. So good luck and Happy Birthday. I know a lot of adults who would be willing to trade places with you.
Michele
|
Good morning-
I have been working at a job I am happy with for 9 months, but my supervisor feels I demean her in front of her boss, especially during meetings. We are all asked for our opinions on what we feel might go wrong with a particular project my boss is in charge of (which has been behind on it's implementation), but I know that in the end the problems I currently see will be resolved. I give honest answers in these meetings (in front of the VP), but she feels I volunteer too much information on the problems we currently face in front of him and this embarasses her. There are bugs with the system, and we have several weeks to correct them. I have been told I have embarrased her twice before in meetings regarding this project, and I just want my questions answered, for I am the one responsible for the outcome once the project is complete and implemented. She feels since I question her in front of the boss, I am belittling her and she tells me I am out of line. She has held me accountable for this once in front of other associates not in my department, and once in a sit down meeting that I instigated because of the first incident. My review is due in less than 2 months, and am TERRIFIED I am going to get a bad review just because I am trying to get a better comfort level here. This position is close to home, pays very well, but I have to work some long hours due to this project implementation. The bottom line is that I don't want to leave and want to work things out. I get support from one other person on my team, who is not her supervisor. He doesn't feel I'm doing anything wrong, but I need to have an outsider's opinion before I go crazy. I am hoping that someone can assist me, for I feel that if I don't get a better handle on things with my own approach and attitude that I either will be fired or will want to leave (which is where I feel I am at right now). Thank you in advance for your assistance. (link)
|
Hi, I am familiar with your problem and I can help. I have helped other people in this situation, and the advice worked well. I have been working for 35 years, and this is not uncommon, you will run across it again and the soon you learn how to handle people like your boss, the better your career will go.
First of all, your boss feels threatened by you. I am assuming that you are young and bright and she may feel, smarter than her, and will make a big impression and soon surpass her in this company. DOn't worry, you can still do that if that is your goal, but with her help. It won't happen if she hates you, (you are correct in thinking you may get a bad review, and you may very well) SO you have to make her your advocate, your friend. Here is my suggestion. Even if it is you coming up with the ideas and the concerns/questions/resolutions....include her in the process. IN meetings, say things like "my boss" (I don't know her name) and I were talking about that very issue, and here is the resolution WE came up with. To make her more open to you, you can get her on your side by paying her compliments. (This works well with people who are petty, and she sounds petty) Compliment her clothes, her car, her choice of careers, anything that won't sound too phony. Compliment her on the way she handles something, or someone else. When she resolves an issue, say "Wow that is a great idea, I would like to help with that. Or Why didn't I think of that"
DOn't go overboard, she may be suspicious. Be subtle. Support her ideas maybe with co-workers or subordinates so that she will support yours. And for now, include her in your ideas, as if she contributed, and she will become your advocate. Maybe run your ideas by her before the meetings so that she can have her seal of approval, and tell when talking about them say "we". You are going to do well, don't let people like this stand in your way, but you can't bowl them over, you still have to prove yourself. And that will take time. SHe can cause a "black mark" on your work record...so tread lightly. If you can't turn her around (and some people you just can't) just chalk it up to experience. Don[t burn your bridges. Dealing with difficult people is part of our work lives. She won't be the only one you will run across in your career. And then be sure that when you are a supervisor, that you don't act this way. It is always good to promote those beneath you and their ideas. We cannot do everything ourselves, so hiring and promoting the right people also makes us look good.
Good LUck
Michele
addendum
Yes I agree completely. Very often the Big Boss has no idea how to deal with a middle manager that has taken their position and turned it into a fiefdom. They leave the subordinates to deal with it, hoping to find some one who can work with them and stay, rather than dealing with the person who causes the problem. Good luck to you. You are on the right track.
Michele
|
|
YOu asked in one of your answers "What is an Agony Aunt?" It is an Advice Columnist. (link)
|
Oh, cool, so I guess that is what I am too! Glad to know that.
Thanks.
Michele
|
Hey its Jacey I'm the girl who lost her brother almost a month back and now im really feeling odd, you answered my question and i noticed u were older and had kids.
I wanna know whats going through my parents' heads. I mean losing your kid sucks, but I'm 13 i could be scared for life right? I really want to ask my parents about it, but they never talk about him. It's like he doesnt exist and like i said i dont want to forget him, I still love him gaddamnit! I just dont know why my parents can't see that.
My friends are still treating me weird and they dont no anything. There's one that i can trust but people are starting to throw around rumors about us. I mean i know this kid kinda has like a little crush on me but we've been friends forever. But now I'm barely even able to talk to him. I've moved on with MY life, but I've somehow left the world behind.
Everything moves so slow and nobody gets that i want to move on, I need to. They expect me to dwell on it. I cant do that. But I need to let out my feelings.
I wanna know why people are treating me like this and I wanna know how I can stop it.
Jacey
(link)
|
HI Jacey,
It is nice to hear from you again. This must have a lot to do with your brother dieing so suddenly and so tragically and so young. I do understand how you feel. I wish there were a magic word that could help your parents out. But I don't know it. I have heard from many adults, who lost a brother or sister when they were young, and the parents never recovered. And the parents behavior did have an adverse affect on the surviving child. But you are correct you do have to get along with your life. Your age is one reason why you are able to get on with your life. You have everything to look forward to, and even though your brother died young, you still fell that the chances of that happening to you are slim to none, and you are correct. All kids think they are immortal, it comes with the age. It is normal If kids did not think they were invincible, they would never venture far away from the safety net of their home and their parents and they would never grow up and have a life.
Even though I have kids, I have thought about what I would do if something happened to one of them. I have given it, and life itself a lot of thought, as well as living an dying. And while I would be emotionally hurt, I know that I would go on with life. I would not shut down. No matter how short or long a persons life is here on earth, each of us has or had a purpose. And we fulfilled it before we left. IT may not be obvious to us who are left here, but that is the way of life and death. But I also believe that we come back to life in another person. Our spirit lives on.
So while I agree you have the right attitude. I don't know how to tell you to get the people around you to accept your brother's death and your attitude. All I can say is don't get discouraged. One day you will be an adult (soon, really) You'll be in college or you'll be working, and meeting new people who won't have known you when you were 13 and lost your brother and won't be in a position to judge you about how you behaved when he passed on. And that is what you are worried about, people's judgement of you. But I think you are emotionally healthy, and moving in the right direction, so don't worry about other people's judgement. Mostly it is our FEAR that we are being judged for all kinds of reasons, our looks, our weight, our brains, out boyfriends, our cars, but in reality, most people are so consumed with thinking about themselves, that they are not judging the people around them. I do hope your parents find the solace that they need. But it is still early. I really believe that they blame them selves for his death. That is a mistake. But so many of us do that. They feel helpless, and are so consumed with saying if only, if only if only..........It solves nothing and leaves you out of the pictures. You just may have to go this one alone, without the support of your parents. But since you are aware of it, then be kind to them, and find your path. You will do alright. The best thing you can do is have a good life in respect of your brother. I am sure that that is what he would want you to do.
GOod luck, make sure you have a good future. Get an education. You do know how fleeting life can be so don't waste it, honey.
Michele
|
|
Today, my Aunt, who is like my *best friend in the world!!!* passed away suddenly. I'm completely devastated.. Saturday is the wake, and on Sunday is the funeral the funeral; I have to answer tomorrow on whether I have chosen to attend these events or not. I've been told over and over that it is MY decision, and no one will be angry with me either way. Honestly, I'm scared... I don't know quite what these event entail, so I was wondering if someone could possibly share their past experiences, and even views on what a funeral means to *YOU. I feel that I would like to remember her how she WAS... and not the day of her funeral. And yes, I know that just because I attend the funeral I will STILL have my memories of her and such, it's just an upsetting thought that my last time seeing her would be at her funeral. On the other hand, I feel I should be there to support my family; and maybe like it's a true final farewell? I'm not really sure; I guess I'm just so overwhelmed. But any answer on this would be greatly appreciated. Thank you -- "Mackenzie" (link)
|
Dear Mackenzie, I am very sorry for your loss. I think you should attend the services out of respect for your aunt and her immediate family. We attend these services out of respect. To help the family mourn. And yourself. Nothing will make you feel better. Going or not going...no difference. But a person that meant that much to you deserves your respect and heartful sorrow on her passing. It does do the famil good to see how many other people show up. It shows you all that your aunt was special. YOU all knew that, but you will be very pleased to see how many other people thought so too. It will mean a lot to you, and to your family. You will be glad that you were there to witness how many people thought highly of your aunt. While it won't bring her back. It is nice to see how many people are concerned for her, for you and for your whole family. YOu won't be dissapointed if you do go, and no one expects you to act in any special way. Just be there. IF some one says a few words to you, like "Sorry for your loss" you say thank you. YOu may want to share so memories of your aunt with someone and that is Ok.
I hope this helps.
Michele
|
I have been feeling really weird lately. I've been exhausted and I feel really weak. I can't consentrate, eat, or sleep. I'll try to do something and I'll get out of breath really quickly which isn't like me. I usually run a mile everday and I don't get out of breath from walking in my house. It's really stange. I think that there might be something wrong with me but I don't know what. I'm usually never like this. My friend said that I probably have AIDS because I had sex for the first time last week but we used protection and I don't think that AIDS affects you right away. I really don't know anything about diseases or illnesses or anything like that so if anyone has any idea about what might be wrong with me or what might have caused it please help me.
I will rate high for anyone who at least tries (link)
|
No you don't have aids. Even if you had an aids test it wouldn't show up for 6 months. And first you would have an HIV infection and some people have that for years before they got full blown aids. Let me see....from your description, and I am guessing that your age is teenager, and you probably don't eat right. I would guess that you are anemic. It is an iron deficiency. And being anemic and/or having an iron deficiency means that you have a low red blood count. And one of the symptoms is lack of energy, shortness of breath. Is you skin pale also? Could be a sign but not the only one. Foods that contain iron are red meat, molasses, beans, spinach, etc. How much of that do you eat. Don't tell me, none right. WHy not try taking multi vitamins and see if that helps, And I don't mean ONe a Day's those are lousy vitamins. Ask the pharmacist for a good multi vitamin. Eat more fresh veggies, fruit and lean red meats and chicken and turkey. Kids also need calcium, so drink milk, low fat . But there is no iron in milk. Look up the symptoms on the internet. There are lots of sites that give you information on diseases by putting in your symptoms. HOpe this helps
Michele
|
Well heres the thing..
Sex..
im completely ready but im scared that the condom will break and ill end up pregnant!
any advice on the subject??
thanks
i rate 5's (link)
|
Well I don't think you are ready if you don't have all the information that you need to prevent pregancy, and yes condom do break. And you will be totally responsible for the consequenses, the boy gets off scott free. YOu are the one who will have to tell your parents, and you are the one that will have to decide what to do with it, abort it or give it up for adoption or keep it. Say good bye to your life as you know it. Forget having fun for the next 18 years. And everyone will know what you did, because you will be pregnant. If you were REALLY ready, you would have gone to the doctor and obtained some birth control, and use that to prevent pregnancy and use the condum to prevent disease. And if you a not old enough to make an appointment at the doctors, and pay for it, and pay for your monthly birth control prescription, then YOU ARE NOT READY. B ut I am sure your boyfriend is because he doesn't have to do any of those things. He just has to get a hard on, ejaculate, and kiss you good bye. Please wait a little longer.
Michele.
|
Hi, I have been talking to this guy online.....I really like him..he asked me out and I said yes. DOnt worry I have no intentions on meeting him anytime soon.But i dont know if I should tell my friends about him because they think talking to people online that you dont know is wrong..and i know they will probably get mad at me and think I am crazy.
What should I do??
Thanks (link)
|
Well I am going tell you the same thing. Your friends are right. IT is dangerous. And you agreed to go out with him because you want to have a boyfriend, that is understandable, but do you want to be dead. Only you can decide if you want to keep talking to this guy on line. But don't ever meet up with him. Don't ever meet him anywhere alone. If you meet with him you had better have all your friends with you, and if he had aproblem with that.....then don't agree to meet with him. Honey listen pedophiles an kidnappes know exactly what they are doing. They know how to pass themselves off as teenage boys. It is so easy. you know NOTHING about him, except that he says all the right things. Of course he does. Please don't risk it. DOn't tell him where you live, or anything about you.
Find out all you can about him, see if you have some common friends or neigbors? Ask those people about him. If he knows NO ONE that you know, then stay away. There are thousands of guys out there. You will meet someone some day. Don't be in such a hurry or it could ruin your life. THink of those girls who were kidnapped, or raped or killed. When they realized what was happening, they would have dond ANYTHING to go back and start over again. The first people they think about is their family. And how sorry they are. Please don't take this chance. You must be worried about it or you wouldn't be asking about it on this website. No one on this website should be telling you that it is OK for you to go meet up with some stranger that you met over the internet.
Michele
|
|
hey im 14..i have a dance in two days..and i really have to go shopping..ineed like 150$..and i have to make it on my own..im mad i waiting last minute..ergh but any ideass please respond!!!!!!!!!!!!thankssss (link)
|
You sure did wait until the last minute. Can you do any chores for you neighbors. Mow their lawns, walk their dogs, feed their cats, go to the store for them. Clean house. Do you have anything you can sell?
Hope this helps
Michele
|
|
well this summer i'm going to take p.e in the morning for summer that way next year i don't have to . after that i plan to go to dance class , and later on work out .the dancing will be hip pop..i really don't need to take it i have people always wanting them for me to show them how i dance and if i could help them with there dancing . i just want to do something that will keep me busy. but at the samw time i want to lose wieght ..do u think its possilbe to at least lose 20 pounds or so by next year ? (link)
|
With all that stuff your doing this summer, you will definitly loose 20 lbs. And fast too, now just be careful what you snack on. No soda, a can of soda has 12 teaspoons for sugar in it. No cakes, pies, cookies, donuts, etc. No chips or doritos. Snack on Pretzels low fat popcorn, popsicles, sno cones. hard candy, no chocolate. Eat lots of fruits and veggies, very little cheese, and low fat or skim milk. Make those changes for six weeks, and you will easily loose 20 lbs. Oh and lots of water!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Good Luck
Michele
|
|
my freind has 2 holes in each ear, and she wanted another one. has been buggin her mom for like half a year. a few days ago, she peirced it. she told me that it hurt...so she only stuck the needle halfway through. now there is a reddish purple bump over where the hole should be. it is soo noticable is it infected or something? (link)
|
It certainly sounds like it is infected. Put rubbing alcohol on it. It will burn, bug it is killing the bacteria. Continue to put rubbing alcohol on it three or more times a day. If you can put some neosporine on it and leave it there, inbetween swabing it with alcohol that is good. If the alcohol doesn't burn when you put it on , that means that the hole has sealed shut and the infection is inside. Bad News. She may have to get a needle of anti-biotics in there to keep it from getting worse. Large doses of vitamin C will help. taken orally, I mean.
Michele
|
Hey, my gerbil has a scent gland tumor. It's kind of big and I put some valerian root in his water to try and help him. It's seemed to help a bit. Does anybody know any other things I can do to help him and maybe reverse the damage, other than surgery?
By the way, I'm not giving him surgery because he's pretty old and I don't want to stress him out. (link)
|
Vitamin C. CRush up some vitamin C or get some liquid vitamin C and put it in his food or water. The more you get into him the better. I use it whenever my pets have a illness or injury or abcess. It works best on bacterial infections, but I supposed it can't hurt a tumor. If you can see the tumor, if it is on the outside, you could also try putting Tea Tree Oil on it. It has a very strong oder, but I works well to heal almost everything. That is what I would do.
Michele
|
|
tha school yr is almost over and i wanna tell this guy how i feel before the end. but how do i tell him? i mean it's weird that i haven't told him yet, should i write him a letter? i mean, i really like this guy but im not so sure he likes me in that way. i know this sounds all 1st grade, but this is high school. i may never have the chance again and when it comes to expressing my feelings, i get scared. and i dont wanna seem all dorky for writing love letters and getting talked about. i dont want this guy to think im all emotional and sensitive. cause im not. i want him to know the truth and i wanna tell him in words that i would actually say to him. so how should i do this? (link)
|
Well if you want to find out how he feels about you, you could just give him a cute little card, and say in it. That you hope he has a nice summer, that you enjoyed his company and that you hope to see him or run into him over the summer. Or hope we can get together over the summer. So if he makes a point to see you over the summer,than I guess he likes you too.
Michele
|
|
today when i was riding horses with my mom and aunt my mom told me that my mole...its like on the side of my chin...she told me that it was changing colors....she said that it was getting darker, and that we should go to a doctor and get it checked out and my aunt agreed...and now i cant get my mine off of it...what if it is cancerous(sp?) it makes me really worried. so my question is...if i do get this mole removed will it hurt?? does it leave scars?? (sorry so long..ill rate high!) please help!!! (link)
|
NO plastic surgeons do a wonderful job today, there should be no scar. They are afraid not to do a good job, because they don't want to get sued. Also they will have to numb the area with a needle, but after that there should be no pain. But when it is healing it will get sore. Make sure you follow the doctors instructions for after surgery care, or you may end up with a scar.
Michele
|
|