my name is vanessa williams
and i want anyone who has any problems, feel free to ask for advice, i am non judgemental, listen and give you good advice, not what you want to hear but the right advice
take care and God bless
Member Since: May 6, 2005
Answers: 98
Last Update: September 23, 2005
Visitors: 6157
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SRY THIS IS LONG ILL RATE A 5 TO ANY1 WHO ANSWERS IT!!!
okay..im really confused and have no idea what to do...im stuck between 2 guys...the one guy i went out with for about 8 months and we recently broke up about a month and a half ago...well all of a sudden after a month of not talking to me he calls me and says he misses me and wants to get back together with me...the other guy i went out with about a year and a half ago...we have been good friends ever since we broke up...and he recently had a gf but broke up with her bc he liked me and wants to go out with me...i dont know what to do bc i like both of them sooo much and it's so hard...i thought it was going to b easy bc the one guy i thought we werent going to talk to again...SOMEONE HELP PLEASE!! (link)
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hi there
well this is really confusing think about when you were going out who treated you more nicer, who would be there for you in the long run, you are you mostly connescted with on a heart level, and mental level , not paying attention to how they look on the outside , because true beauty comes from within, i am sure you'll make the right choice, i'm sure this is stressing you out, first thing you need to do is to relax, calm down and find out why they want you now when you all broken up,
to be on the safe side
good luck and God bless
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Hi all I need help My wife and I have been married for 28 years have a good relationship but we have a few problems. one is when I play softball in the summer she does not like it when all the guys get together and drink beer or go back to the bar for a beer, I have to tell you that I am not that fond of beer but it is fun to get together after, I find myself just leaving after the game just to avoid a fight with her is it a major thing that I would like to stay for a quick beer and just hang around I personally do not see anything wrong but she hates it.. what should I do thanks... (link)
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hi there,
since she's you wife , you have to talk to her how importnant it is for you to be with your friends because you cant be with her all the time, they are certain ladies that want they men not to have any friends, which they might see as a threat beer isnt good for you , see might see it as a threat like when you get drunk you end up doing something that you'll regret talk to her and hear it from her point of view
good luck
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Okay well, when i woke up this morning, i went to brush my teeth and like the bottom part of the 4 front ones were all like whiteish and ugly and looked gross. Any ideas how this could have happend? How do you get rid of it in 20 minutes? HELP ASAP!! (link)
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hi there,
this use to happen to be when i was younger it does come off try brushing your teeth twice a nice in the morning and just before you go to bed
good luck
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My mom won't let my peirce my belly, and i have wanted it for two years now. I have tryed to convince her that i want it done but she still says no! Any ideas? Please help asap!!!!! (link)
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hi there,
my mum was like that, like you are not going to have youre belly pierced, but they eventually come around, in the end, show her that you are responsible you know all the safety precautions, when i had mine done you had to put like antispectic on it so it heals in the proper way and not to take the healing jewellery until the cool off period and thenwhen its healed you can change it, if you decide to tell her before you do it convince her that you are well aware of the precautions and you are responsible enough to take care of it i also stress that you must be aware of all the precautions
good luck in whatever you decide
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Ok.. well my mom works for social services. and she got this job when i was in third grade (i'm currentlly in 8th) and ever since then shes been SO overprotective. She doesn't like for me to do things without her knowing every single detail. She's takin the lock off my bedroom door. so that she can walk in at any given moment just to see what i'm doing. And it's getting worse every day. Even when i was in 3rd grade i didn't have a 'bed time' but now she's making me go to bed at 9 oclock. it's getting really bad. i'm getting ready to be in high school and i still have a bedtime. i feel like such a child because i never get to do anything. And i've tried talking to her. And i've told her that i think she is to protective. Yet nothing ever changes. What should i do?
14/f (link)
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hi there, i don't know why she's being so protective, it shows that she loves you its better to have a protective parent and that yo'll know you save than one who dosent care, well my advise it for you to have a serious conversation with both of your parent because you arent going to be little forever , sooner or later she's going to have to let you have you're privacy or try talking to a relative or your dad , she might be worried just incase something happened to someone she knew just be honest talk to her in a mature way so she'll see it from your point of view not just from her view as a parent
whatever you decided good luck and stay safe
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Hey. I am in great need for some help-PLEASE! lol. I have to come up with a thesis statement(around 3 points to prove what i am trying to say) and it can be anything..that compares ...the 2 novels...THE HOUSE ON MANGO STREET...and ...TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD..if you have any knowledge on either of these are any ideas for a thesis statement..i would greatly appreciate it.THANKS SOOOO MUCH!=)
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The House on Mango Street traces Esperanza Cordero's coming-of-age through a series of vignettes about her family, neighborhood, and secret dreams. Although the novel does not follow a traditional chronological pattern, a story emerges, nevertheless, of Esperanza's self-empowerment and will to overcome obstacles of poverty, gender, and race. The novel begins when the Cordero family move into a new house, the first they have ever owned, on Mango Street in the Latino section of Chicago. Esperanza is disappointed by the red, ramshackle house. It is not at all the dream-house her parents had always talked about, nor is it the house high on a hill that Esperanza vows to one day own herself.
Esperanza is not only ashamed of her home, but she is also uncomfortable with her outside appearance, which she feels does not convey the true personality hidden insider her. She is very self-conscious about her name, whose mispronunciation by teachers and peers at school sounds very ugly to her ears. Esperanza was named after her great- grandmother, who was tricked into marriage and doomed to a life of sadness afterwards. Esperanza vows that she will not end up like the first Esperanza and so many women do- watching life pass by through the window. To break free from her name connotations, she longs to rename herself "Zeze the X," a choice she finds more reflective of her true self.
As the new girl on the block, Esperanza observes many of life's most joyous and harsh realities while meeting her Mango Street neighbors. Her first friend, Cathy, is a short-lived friendship because Cathy's father soon moves the family away because the neighborhood is getting bad, or in other words becoming more inhabited by lower-class Latinos like Esperanza's family. Two other young sisters, however, adopt Esperanza into their circle when she chips in money to help them buy a bicycle. Lucy and Rachel help Esperanza ponder the wonders of growing up by inventing rhymes about hips and parading around Mango Street in high-heeled shoes.
The older kids on Mango Street open Esperanza's eyes to the hardships faced by young people in rough neighborhoods. Louie's cousin's car-theft, the hit-and-run death of a boy Marin meets at the dance, and Marin's own desperate attempts to find a husband to take her away show Esperanza the limited possibilities she herself faces. Alicia, on the other hand, exemplifies self-betterment and strength in the face of stereotypes to Esperanza. Alicia, despite her father's macho views, attends a university and studies all night so she can one day be more than her father's housekeeper.
As the novel progresses, Esperanza starts to notice her budding sexuality. She is excited when boys on the street or at a dance look at her; however, two instances of sexual violence destroy Esperanza's illusions of true love and her first kiss. So too, her promiscuous friend Sally's behavior also contributes to Esperanza's cynicism and caution when dealing with the opposite sex. Nevertheless, Esperanza still dreams of sitting outside at night with her boyfriend, but she has set her standards higher than most of the women around her. She refuses to seek out a man to "escape," because she has seen too many neighbors unhappy in marriage. Ruthie, for example, has run away from her husband and has lost her senses; young Rafaela is so beautiful that her husband locks her indoors when he leaves. The tragedy which hits Esperanza the hardest though, is that of Sally. Her friend, who, like Esperanza only wanted to dream and share love, is first beaten by her father to prevent Sally ruining the family with her "dangerous" beauty. To escape, Sally, though underage, marries a traveling salesman and the cycle of abuse continues. Enraged and saddened by her friend's tragedy, Esperanza vows to leave Mango street, become a writer, and build her dream home.
Although Esperanza is constantly reaffirming that she wants to move away from Mango Street, we know by the end novel that she will one day return to help those who will not be so lucky as she. Indeed, in the closing pages Esperanza admits that she cannot escape Mango Street; that what friends like Alicia were telling her was true: Esperanza cannot cut ties with Mango Street. It has influenced her dreams and personality and she has learned valuable life lessons from its inhabitants. That is why, explains Esperanza, she tells stories about the house on Mango Street, finding the beauty amidst dirty streets is finding her true self.
to kill a monkingbird
The story of To Kill a Mockingbird takes place in Alabama in the Depression, and is narrated by the main character, a little girl named Scout Finch. Her father, Atticus Finch, is a lawyer with high moral standards. She and her brother, Jem, and their friend Dill are intrigued by the local rumors about a man named Boo Radley who lives in their neighborhood but never sets foot from his house. Legend has it that he once stabbed his father in the leg with a pair of scissors, and he is made out to be a kind of monster. Dill is from Mississippi but spends his summer in Maycomb at a house near the Finches.
The children are curious to know more about Boo, and create a mini-drama to enact which tells the events of his life as they know them. They slowly begin moving closer to the house itself, which is said to be haunted. They try leaving notes for Boo on his windowsill, but are caught by Atticus, who firmly reprimands them. Then they try sneaking to the house at night and looking through its windows. However, Boo's brother, Nathan Radley, who lives with him, thinks he hears a prowler and begins firing his gun. The children get away, though Jem loses his pants in a gate. When he returns, his ripped pants have been folded and roughly sewn up.
Other mysterious things happen to the Finch children. A certain tree near the Radley house has a hole in which little presents are often left for them, such as pennies and chewing gum. When they leave a note for the giver of these gifts, Boo's brother plugs up the hole the next day with cement. The next winter brings unexpected cold and snows, and the house of the kind neighbor Miss Maudie catches on fire. While Jem and Scout, shivering, watch the blaze from near the Radley house, someone puts a blanket around Scout. She doesn't realize until afterwards that Boo Radley must have been the one to do this.
Atticus decides to take on a case involving a black man named Tom Robinson who has been accused of raping a very poor white girl named Mayella Ewell, a member of the notorious Ewell family, who belong to the layer of Maycomb society that people refer to as "trash." The Finches all face harsh criticism in racist Maycomb because of Atticus's decision to defend Tom, but Atticus insists upon going through with the case because his conscience could not let him do otherwise. He knows that Tom has almost no chance, because the white jury will never believe his story, but he wants to reveal the truth of what happened to his fellow townspeople as well as expose their bigotry.
Scout and Jem find themselves whispered at and taunted, and they have trouble keeping their tempers. At a family Chirstmas gathering, Scout beats up her cloying relative Francis when he accuses Atticus of ruining the family name. Jem cuts off the tops of an old neighbor's flower bushes after she derides Atticus, and then as punishment he has to read out loud to her every day while she breaks her morphine addiction. Atticus holds this old woman up as an example of true courage: the will to keep fighting even when you know you can't win.
The time for the trial draws closer, and Atticus's sister Alexandra comes to stay with the family. She is proper and old-fashioned and wants to shape Scout into the model of the Southern feminine ideal, much to Scout's resentment. Dill runs away from his home, where his mother and new father don't seem interested in him, and stays in Maycomb for the summer of Tom's trial. The night before the trial, Tom is moved into the county jail, and Atticus, fearing a possible lynching, stands guard outside the jail door all night. Jem is concerned about him, and the three children sneak into town to find him. A group of men arrives ready to cause some violence to Tom, but Scout runs out and begins to speak to one of the men, the father of one of her classmates in school. Her innocence brings them out of their mob mentality, and they leave.
The trial pits the evidence of the white Ewells against Tom's evidence. According to the Ewells, Mayella asked Tom to do some work for her while her father was out, and Tom came into their house and forcibly beat and raped Mayella until her father appeared and scared him away. Tom says that Mayella invited him inside, then threw her arms around him and began to kiss him. When her father arrived, he flew into a rage and beat her, while Tom ran away in fright. According to the sheriff's testimony, Mayella's bruises were on the right side of her face. Tom Robinson's left arm is useless due to an old accident, whereas Mr. Ewell leads with his left. Given the evidence, Tom should go free, but after hours of deliberation, the jury pronounces him guilty.
Though the verdict is unfortunate, Atticus feels some satisfaction that the jury took so long deciding‹usually the decision would be made in minutes, because a black man's word would not be trusted. Atticus is hoping for an appeal, but unfortunately Tom tries to escape from his prison and is shot to death. Jem has trouble handling the results of the trial, feeling that his trust in the goodness and rationality of humanity has been betrayed.
Meanwhile, Mr. Ewell has been threatening Atticus and other people connected with the trial because he feels he was humiliated. He gets his revenge one night while Jem and Scout are walking home from Halloween play at their school. He follows them home in the dark, then runs at them and attempts to kill them. Jem breaks his arm, and Scout, who wearing a confining costume, is helpless throughout the attack. However, the elusive Boo Radley stabs Mr. Ewell and saves them. Scout finally has a chance to meet the shy and nervous Boo. The sheriff declares that Mr. Ewell fell on his own knife so that Boo won't have to be tried for murder. Scout walks Boo home. He goes inside and she never sees him again.
i hope this was helpful
the only thing is that you have to compare these two books it shouldnt be too hard you may say the beneit and the drawback and how they influence you as a reader
good luck
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WHat are some good ways to lose weight. (link)
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some poeple become gym junkies, other consume less fat and carbonhydrates and eat lots of fruits an dvegetable and don'y consume fast food it is hard you have to be well tivated not to eat junk food
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How can I become more self confident? (link)
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i have got a self confidence problem, it want easy for me , because the world sees me differenly that how i see my self , all i can say is be self appreciative on everything you do , never give up , and you have to belive in whatever you do
good luck
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ok ... so my mom said that if i loose 10 pounds shed give me 100 dollers!! the problem is..i dont know how.. i cant exercise regularly cause i never have time im always doing soemthing and i cant really eat special things cause one weekend im with my dad and one day during the week i am with him...i dont kno what to do i need HELP! what could i do to loose weight??????????? thank you sooo so much! OxoxO
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hi there, well losing weight should be if you want to not because you mum is offering you money but if you want, 30 minutes of gym and a strict diet , that means less carbohydrates and more proteins, more fruits, drink alot of water try to eat less fatty stuff this includes fast food eat alot of vegetables like cabbage, lettuce etc
thank you very much and good luck
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hey i need help because my birthday is coming up im turning 14 and i dont no what t ype of party i should have?? i dont want to invite people over my h ouse for a sleepover so any ideas for birthday parties??? ill rate 5s (link)
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you could have a place rented a safe place,or you could use your house, or a rented house, most people i know rent a building for the day and have a swell party, with a dj, lots of food and drinks etc
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Where could i buy a treadmill? and approximately how much do they cost? (link)
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you can do some catalogue shopping, through the internet, check rating before buying anything through the internet, i can't really tell you how much they cost because of the currency so if you want more information what country are you from then i will tell you how much it cost because i have one
goodluck
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hi there does what goes around come around because i believe in doing the right thing, but i feel like what in it for me (link)
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hi there, i just need to tell you, first of all i believe in always doing the right thing, you have to remember what goes around comes around , we all reep what we so, sowhich is also known as karma good or bad.
for instance, if a perso, has being spreading rumours which arent true it all depends if you are a strong person to ignore it but it does effect you for say a boy you are so connected with, but if he is any man , he would hear it from your point of view
good luck
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ok to day i went to a bible study at school, I used to go to church and youth group but the youth minister left the church and i havent been back since....but anyway today when i was there things where really emotional...people were crying and they asked us to bow our heads and asked who wanted to be saved...the asked us to raise our hands and then the leaders came over and prayed over them...But I felt scared to raise my hand....Im regreting it now....I want God in my life but I'm afraid Ive missed my chance.
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everyone get scared , i am a strong christain, and i believe that evryone deserves a second chance, itcould be that it wasnt you chnce then , and now you can take opportunity now , stop dweeling in the past, focus on the present and if you believe in God, not just a christain by name anything is possible
God bless
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I have this friend, and i really like him more than a friend. But i dont know if he feels the same way about me. He talks to me sometimes, but out of school like at sport he usually talks to me. He is kind of rude, he calls me dumass (lol) and tells me to shutup. But he only said that once. He tries to make me laugh too, and he talks to me sometimes, but more to some other girls. Today, he kept pushing me and laughing, then i push him back and he laughs. And he poured water over my head and also tried to wet me. The question is - I wana know if he likes me more than a friend or not..
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hi there
i can't tell you from what you are saying if he likes you, well i=he might be shy because he wouldnt think that you would go out with him, because male are scared of rejection as much as us females.
since you hang around with him, he might be fond of you the only way you'll know is if you ask him, or get someone you can trust to ask him for you without him knowing that is you that wants to you
whatever you decide
good luck
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Okay, so there's this guy that's been my really good friend for a long time. Last October, I got a crush on him. Then in December, he had a girlfriend, but he told me that he'd liked me since October too, and a week later, he broke up with his girlfriend. But he didn't ask me out until a month later, because he 'didn't want people to think he liked me when he liked his other girlfriend'. So we were 'sort of' going out for about a month, but we never actually went on a date. He asked me out to a carnival, but then he ditched me. Then...worst of all...the school dance. He danced with me once, and then went back to his ex girlfriend and was dancing with HER for the rest of the time. I talked to him and he told me he didn't like me anymore, but we decided to stay friends anyways.
Now, about 3 months later...I think I still like him, but I'm not sure. We're still very good friends. I want him to be happy with whatever girl he goes out with, but I'm jealous at the same time. My heart jumps when I had to kiss him on the cheek for this school performance..and when I fell asleep on his shoulder in the movie theater (with other friends there)...and I feel crap when I see the girl he likes sleeping on his other shoulder, or sitting super close to him. What should I do? How do I get over him? Please help! (link)
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hi there , i think these feeling are really confused, first of all was he the one that revealed his feeling for you or maybe he didnt want to hurt your feeling, but i think you got hurt anyway
i think what you are doing is very good, because from what you wrote ou are not trying to break them up, it shows that you truly love him and that you are a great friend because you love him enough to be happy with the next girl, not persistent on two of you being together , maybe he isnt ready for a staedy relationship because he might be scared that he'll end up hurting you and you two wouldnt speak together
ii believe that you truly love him, i don't know about any way you can get over someone, just give it time and i know that its not easy
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My boyfriend was been depressed latly so i have been wanting to do something nice for him..well im only 15 and he's 17 so getting places isnt a problem since he can drive...well i donno what to do for him..i was thinking of getting him a new watch or makeing him dinner or takeing him out to dinner but im not sure. does anyone have any idea's or suggestions..or maybe share something you have done nice for your BF??
thanks a lot =) (link)
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hi there,
from my experience men would like to be wine and dine just as us women you could make a romatic meal for you ad him, get his favorite food,drink and setting , try going to the cinema , his he is to games , or does he just want to chill anything , what about a sensual massage, it so definately relaxing
hope this was alot of help, good luck
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I am having a party in two weeks because its the end of the school year. I have this one friend who I just met this year. I really like her and I want to invite her to my party. The only problem is that some of my friends dont like her. They think she is annoying. I really want her at my party but I dont want to upset my friends either. Some of my friends said they wont come if she is there. I really want my new friend there but I also want my other friends to have a good time and come. What should I do? Thanks for your help! (link)
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i think if they are all your friend, they should come together to celebrate your birthday and put their differences aside, because if they are your true friends the will try at least make an effort, since it your party
good luck
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well theres this guy at my school and ive always really liked him. but hes one of these guys that everybody likes and is really popular so people just think hes out of their legue and so forget about him. well that what i thought anway but now ive found out that he likes me. he asked someone for my msn address and so ive been talking to him a lot. then he asked me for my number so we have been txting each other a lot. and the thing he has been saying are seriously flirty! and sayin what we could do when we are together. but heres the thing he hasnt asked me out or anything so we arent actually an item or anything. and my mate has asked him if hes goin to ask me out but he just said not yet because he wanted to get to know me but now im thinking does he just want to be friends? does he really like me? please help me! i rate high if its good! (link)
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maybe he just want something from you because if he isnt going out with you , and he's sending flirty text message and he is the good looking type he could have a mixed hidden agenda
beware for anything
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my prom date asked me what the color of my dress was. i am curious as to why he would asked does anyone have a clue?
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maybe he has a surprise for you that matches your outfit
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I used to be very fond of this guy a lot and sort of those feelings still remain with me to this day. The thing is that this guy I'm sure has moved on and I'm nearly there when it comes to this. I mean this guy has put me through so much and although we don't talk, it's like I know him . He hangs out with other girls now, and he's more popular now . I don't want to be with him, but it's just that it seems like all of my friends are liking him. My feelings for him are still yet causing me insecurities .I just want to know why he can't look at me, and I want to know why he's going out with all those girls . I need advice on how to get real closure and I mean real, real, closure. Don't tell me time . I've spent three years with time . Just please. Help me . Oh and if it's time, then make sure that you have a good explanation please and some tips . Thanxs to yah (link)
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i can't tell you i know what you are going through i can only have a clue, you must be hurt right now well i think you should talk to him, not necessarily about the relationship, just see where he's coming from , maybe he isnt ready for a steady relationship, he want to play the field
all i can say everything happens for a reason, you will know when the times right, you might have a picture of him and say I AM OVER YOU, it works for my friend
Good luck
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