about

♥♥♥♥♥♥
The name is Leah. I live in Cincinnati, OH. I really love to give advice! I have been here since November of 2004. But prior to joining here, I was always been seeked for advice. Still to this day, my primary concern is always helping someone out in need.

I am likely not the best columnist here, but I can quarantee I am very dedicated and concerned when I answer a question. If I answer a question you're not satisfied with, I will ask why, so I can try my best to change my answer. I only give people information that I know; not information that I might know. And if I notice a columnist giving you a wrong answer, you'll know I'll be correcting their response!!

I do allow everyone and anyone to ask a question. I may have listed favorite categories, but I really have no preference. I do love making new friends!! It's no problem to contact me by e-mail or IM. I do have a Myspace, and I will gladly give it out if asked! If you ever need advice, if you feel like ending it all, if you feel like no one cares, I am here!! Talk to me.. I will listen and I will help you!!

♥Leah

advice

My senior pictures are coming up. My face isn't fat but for some reason in all my school pictures my face looks fat and huge. and only in school pictures because all the ones on my myspace and stuff aren't like that. What can i do so it wont look like that in my senior pictures, i'd really like for them to be good.

I don't know if this is an option or not, but I thought I would bring it up, so you could possibly talk it out with the photographer.

With my senior pictures, they came out a bit bad too. Except they are professional, and they're able to professionally edit your picture. They can darken it, lighten it, they can change your facial structure a little, making you almost flawless.

Ask him/her about any changes you can do to your picture. A fee might come along with it, but it is worth it, because I had it done. Maybe [if you know] what company is taking your pictures, and I can see if I can find some options for you.

You can also try the alternate way, and follow up on those websites the previous columnist gave you. Just giving you another possible option.

I hope I helped =]

[view]

ok so i went off depo a few months ago and since then ive gone up a cup size. Im seventeen now and i started depo when i was 15. I got my period when i was 13 if that makes a difference. And i was just wondering if going off of the depo could have made me go up a cup size or if it was something else. And if it did, should i wait longer to continue taking birth control to see if maybe my breasts will grow more? Id be very happy if they went up another cup size

Gunner is right for the most part. Birth control gives you estrogen and progesterone (tricking your body into thinking you're pregnant). And in turn, your boobs will grow bigger. Rates always vary.

Getting off of it, you can still have your boobs growing, since maybe your hormones are flunctuating right now. Being 17, your boobs can still grow but normally not substantially.

Going back on it, or stopping it is all up to you. If you do prefer growth (as you say), maybe go on another contraceptive, such as an oral one. I know oral contraceptives can help. I was on birth control for two years, and my boobs definitely grew. Maybe changing it will help.

_________
EDIT: I was on several birth controls. The one that made my boobs grow the biggest was Femcon Fe. Yet I was also on Ortho Tricylcen Lo, Yaz, and another one but can't think of it at this time. Femcon Fe was the one I was on the longest though, about a year, and grew about a cup size.

I would recommend Ortho actually at first b/c it's a low dose hormone birth control, and in my experience I had the least side effects. I went on to stronger birth controls though because of my PMS and cramps problems. Then, your Doctor may prescribe you something stronger or something; but they may put you on a low dose at first though. Does depend how much was in Depo.
_________

[view]

Does anyone know where i can download or buy the song "part of your world" by chely wright? i looked on frostwire and i cant find it. thanks.

I checked on Limewire, and you can find it there. You can download it for free from them.

[view]

I can't go to the doctor right now and I think I might have gotten pregnant. I've never looked at the pregnancy tests before on the selves in the stores (never had a pregnancy scare) but now I am in need of one. My period is a couple of days late. How much are the pregnancy tests? Expensive?

Prices always vary. It depends if you're wanting the generic or the name brand.

I heard generics work just as well and name brand. You find super cheap pregnancy tests for a few dollars at the dollar store.

If you want quality, go to Walgreens or CVS, and get a pregnancy test. First Response I heard is very accurate, but I always used EPT digital and it's very accurate. A regular pregnancy can vary from 10 dollars to 20 dollars. Depends on the brand, and how many come in a pack.

Like the previous columnist said, get an extra or two in case maybe an error came up or you got a negative but still think you're pregnant.

[view]

I had this young, beautiful, really nice teacher now all of a sudden I can't stop thinking about her, I walk by her room just to get a glimpse of her. I keep thinking she hates me, even though there's no proof of that, and I keep thinking she'll completely forget me and I made a fool of myself in my class even though I really didn't. I also find myself staring at her yearbook picture constantly and I feel miserable all the time. How do I get over it this ridiculous infatuation? Is it normal?
I already know a teacher is out of my league so don't worry about that. Don't tell me I need to get over it I already know that I just don't know how?
Give me serious answer please. Not bullsh*t answers

Everyone goes through this phase. I know I did back in high school. I was obsessed with my German teacher for two years. He was so cute, I kind of always flirted with him, and he had a Myspace at the time so I added him, and always went through his pictures. I knew I had no chance with him but he was just so handsome and nice to me.

After awhile, my obsession started to wear off. He was talking about dating other women, and that turned me off a little. What mainly did, was later on, when students made rumors that he was gay. It was never confirmed, but I ended up going on dates with guys my age, and my obsessive liking of him ceased.

To this day though, I still find him a little cute, but not enough to go see him every day. I'd try to date someone your age, and try not to see your teacher as much. It always wears off sooner or later. And I wouldn't tell you to get over it because it's normal and it happens to everyone. It's like everything else in life -- you go through it, and you learn from it.

Go ahead, and visit her when needed, then gradually decrease visits. Just try hanging with people of your age, and who you enjoy being with. The teacher crush will wear off soon. Just don't even worry about it.

[view]

does anyone know where to get some at a store? (not online) and cheap

I tried researching this on google.. and I got only online stores selling it.

What I did find, was a website that tells you how to make it at home for yourself. It's the cheap way to do it, so maybe I answered that part of the question. Maybe the store part you can buy the ingredient(s)

http://www.essortment.com/lifestyle/homemadedrysha_sido.htm

I hope I helped at all. I know this isn't what you were expecting but I thought you might have interest in making it yourself.. save money and time.

[view]

ok so im 15 years old and i got my period when i was 11.
i havent really been growing much lately.
i was just wondering at what age ill stop growing and if i will still grow

You always have your growth spurt at the beginning of your teenage years. Growing usually stops by 18, but you can keep growing until your early twenties.

[view]

First off. I already KNOW picture theft is identity theft, which is very illegal.
But this girl on this website I'm a part of, she stole someone pictures and I called her out on it.
Now apparenty her 'twin sister' is messaging me and I told her it was illegal
Shes like "uh no it's not if it was my sister would hav gone to jail already"

Could someone please provide me with links and proof that picture theft is illegal? I can't find any pertaining to picture theft

Thankyou!

Are you talking about copyright infringement?

http://www.lostquilt.com/CopyrightInfringement.php

Talks about copyright infringement.

Whether copyrighted or not, you need to give the original user of it permission or give them credit for it. If you use clipart, at least say where you got it from. Saying it's yours makes matters worse.

Please tell that girl what she is doing is illegal. Lawsuits can happen if she does not follow the rules.

[view]

15/f -i have a boyfriend of 11 months i love him so much but we fight nonstop. some friends ask how i put up with it n my only reason is that i love him. i really dont ever wana loose him but im starting to question a breakup what should i do, if we did breakup itd hurt us both so much but the fightings bringing me back to insanity and i start hallucinating again. but we also have alot of magical moments where we are on top of the world n i cant imagine anything better and were so deep in love were talking about when we have kids and our future. i love him so much but i cant handle the fighting anymore, what shud i do?
i also just started likeing a friend, and i feel so bad to like someone else, but does that mean me n my boyfriend are drifting? my boyfriend makes me cry atleast daily from the fights because he is very insecure n i try my hardest to help him, hes doing bad in school and he doesnt workout or do any kind of sports but is like pro guitarist. my dream guy is a guitarist, in great shape, secure in anything, smart and he is hott. and the guy i like has all of that plus hes 18. i designed his tattoo n he got it n shows me often as he flexs his muscles n smiles. he also sometimes helps me with what to say when me and my boyfriend are fighting. but he is my bestfriends brother, altho they are veryyy close so ther more like friends then siblings n us three went out yesterday and it was pretty sweet we kept flirting but i would stop and say something about my boyfriend to remind us both, but it was an overall best n sweetest time with my bestfriends, i like him, but i love my boyfriend even tho its tearing me up. but im never going to cheat. what do i do??

It seems to me that you are confused. When you and your boyfriend fight, what is it exactly over? Is it over small, dumb things or huge, controversial things? It all varies by your relationship between him and your friend. Yet, you love your boyfriend but all you do is fight. Are things getting resolved? Try fixing things.. talking them out with him. See if anything happens.

It's normal to start having feelings for someone else when your relationship is going bad right now. It seems you need emotional support when you boyfriend is unable to give you that. From saying that, it seems as though your crush has more to offer than your boyfriend.

If you feel the relationship won't work at all, even trying to resolve things, I would go to your crush if it is possible in the future. Try working things out, and if things can't work themselves out chances are he's not meant for you. Your crush seems more like someone who'll treat you better, but I can't measure that based off a few paragraphs.

Try going that route if you'd like. Try fixing things with the boyfriend and maybe the feelings for your crush will go away. If things persist or worsen, your boyfriend and you will likely drift apart emotionally, and you'll go nearer to your crush for the emotional support.

Try doing that, and see if it all works out. If you have any more questions, feel free to send me another message. I'll be here for you every step of the way.

Good luck

Leah

[view]

Gas seems like it keeps going up and up and UP! I have to drive a long way to work and it's really killing my paycheck. I was curious if anybody knew when it would go down or something? I'm not sure if you can know in advance :\ I was just hoping...

I think it's like $2.69 here now.

Is it about that much everywhere in the United States, out of curiosity?

Don't worry. It's expected that gas is going to keep going down throughout the whole summer. The average I heard was $2.43 a gallon I think. Somewhere around there. But it's slowly going down (for now).. which is good news right now.

[view]

To start off I will tell you about myself. I am a 21 year old mexican girl. I live wit my parents. Currently no job and I go to college full time.

I have a wonderful boyfriend of 3 years. He is turning 21 in december. And I was going to throw him a huge party. But he would rather go on vacation to cancun for a week. He says he would pay for everything for me which include flight, hotel, food, anything. Just me and him. ROMANTIC! I know. And probably some(2-3) cousins that live in mexico. Its wonderful, exciting. And I want to go really bad..

But here's the thing. I am the first born. I am the baby of the family and my parents would need a ton of convincing to let me go. I need help on tips to convince them. Please help anyone.

Jess is right. You're 21 years old. You're a legal adult. Tell them this is a once in a lifetime opportunity. Assure them you'll have your cell phone, you'll be with a group of people every moment, and you'll keep track of where you are, and where you are going. They can't force you to not go. You're not a minor anymore.

All you can do is assure them that things will be okay. Don't ask them.. just tell them you're going and you'll keep in touch with them while away.

[view]

Ever have those friends so close they feel like siblings? I have a really close brother-friend, and i mean we're ex bf/gf, but that just brings us closer. aaaanyway. he's turning 18, and i want to do something super special for him to let him know how amazing he is and how much he means to me! Any ideas?

just for info
-he's really into creating music in his virtual studio.
-he plays the piano
-he lives and breathes for teching and audio engineering.
-he's a pretty quirky guy, kind of lives for those "i'm insane, and your reaction was hilarious." moments.

I am not sure about your budget, since you don't specify. How about a keyboard? It's like a piano, and you can add sounds and effects to your music. I always loved keyboards.

If not, maybe get him a shirt that is music-related, or make a picture frame with musical notes on it.

[view]

when you said to dunk my face in ice cold water so the rings around my eyes would go away, is that true because i've never tried it. Someone told me to put cold teabags under my eyes..... i just wanted to know which one you think is better and why

Either one will work just fine. Doing a cold compress under your eyes, helps rejuvenate the skin in that area, lessening the appearance of rings. Dermablend makeup can help that too if that may be an option.

[view]

Just out of curiosity: is anal sex supposed to be pleasurable for girls? or is it more something you do to make the guy happy?

In my opinion, it can go either/both way(s). Every couple is different when it comes to needs and wants.

If you want my personal opinion though, I don't prefer anal nor does my partner. But some people like the anal because of no risk of pregnancy.

[view]

My whole life, so far anyways, has been one, big, miserable hell. I'm going to be 19 in September and I don't feel like I can trust anybody. I've been told I'm pretty even beautiful, but I am not popular. Everybody makes fun of me, all throughout school they've made fun of me. My friends make fun of me, my family makes fun of me, and they do it in front of people who just met me which gives them a bad impression of me. I feel like everyone hates me because of some of the stuff they say. Everyone talks down to me when I say how I feel and I just hate it! Everyone seems to want to know how you feel and then when you tell them, they yell at you! I hate my life, and I hate being alive. No one would miss me if I was dead, so why does God keep me alive?

This may sound Cliche, but I know exactly what you're going through because I have been there too.


For years I was sunken into a deep depression. It started at 9 years old, at start of my pre-teen years, and it's still going, but suppressed right now.


For many days, I sat there wondering why I was even alive. My mom was an alcoholic, now just drinks occasionally. She used to beat me, threaten me, and put me down. My dad used to put me down, and he's hit me before too.


The guys I dated were all jerks, and only wanted sex. I got into cybering, but that is all I was used for. I tried alcohol, and the pain got worse.


So at 17 years old, I finally decided to give up for good. I overdosed one morning off pills, and went to school. For awhile I was dizzy, but I wasn't getting real out of it like I was anticipating. That morning, my mom was drunk. So she made my situation worse. At lunch (every day), a bunch of kids would pick on me, and harass me. Call me names... everything. That day, I just said Fuck it.. and stormed out to the Psychologist's office in school. I told her my dad and what I did. I was taken to the hospital, to get checked, did tests and everything. I sat there for hours with my parents which I hated.


I can't get a job, not even one at McDonald's, and I have work experience. I have been to more than 30 interviews, and I got the same old call I am not good enough.


My boyfriend of two years treated me like, Shit! We were engaged but I wouldn't even call it a real engagement. All he did was abuse me, threaten me, control me, and overprotective me in so many negative ways. I couldn't do anything.. and if I wanted to do something I would have to get his permission. He's cheated on me, and lied to me. He even got high on pills when he swore he wouldn't do drugs. Never wanted to cuddle. All he wanted was sex. I felt depressed and worthless. I finally got out of it, and left him.


After all of this, I am still going strong. I finally met someone I truly love. My mom is improving her habit, my dad hasn't done anything for awhile, and my ex stopped trying to contact me. How did this all happen? I talked to them. I told them, I care about you, and I want the best for you. All I ask is you care for me in return (except for the ex of course.) Tell your family you need them. If they keep making fun of you, they're obviously not truly family. Same with friends. You need new friends. You honestly do.


I could never fit in with people. I was always an outsider. Goes back to Elementary when I used to tutor and hang with the mentally challenged kids. Yeah, I got made fun of for that. But I didn't care. I enjoyed what I was doing. I had no friends back then.. I was down about it, but I know things would change.


It took years and years for me to better myself. I use to question my existence. But now I know I am here for a reason just like everyone else. We're here to learn and teach, to make a difference, to teach good in troubled people, cheer people up when they're sad.


And no one hates you. Obviously us at Advicenators do not hate you one bit. We care for you, even though we don't know you personally. We're here for everyone on here.. and that is what I like about this site.


God is keeping you alive for a reason! If he wasn't, you wouldn't even be here in the first place. You were brought into this world for a reason. It's totally okay to not know what that reason is yet.. for some it takes years; and others a lifetime to know. I am 19, and I don't know what my purpose is. I am majoring in healthcare in college, and that is what I love. Maybe do the same route? Go to school for something that interests you.. something you know you could teach others in. Are you good at math? Go to college to become a math teacher. No one likes math anymore, but with people like that, they can make math fun, while learning at the same time.


If every little thing is going wrong, and you have no hope, I would say go start a new life. Meet new people. Do that for awhile to build yourself back up. It's never an overnight thing, so be willing to commit at getting better for the rest of your life.


Don't give up hope, because I didn't and I am glad I didn't. I know right now it doesn't seem that way at all, but it will, I promise. I can't guarantee you perfect life, but I can guarantee things will get better. Keep the faith, pary a little more to God, and do something you enjoy to keep you happy. If you don't know what you like to do, experiment a little Join a tennis team, a local chess team, a blood drive; whatever. Do what makes you happy.


You would be missed by us, if you left. I know we don't know you personally (as I know of), we still care about those who are connected to this site. Everyone is individually special.


Keep going strong.. it took me years to.. and I am still working on it, but now I am seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. If you give up now, you'll never get to see that; metaphorically speaking that is.


Keep the faith, and I will pray for you.


Leah

[view]

okay so 2 days ago,my crush sent me a message and a “poke” on facebook so i sent him back a message and he still hasn’t replied…but i went on his page just now and it said that he commented on someone’s video in his recent activity and then i went back to his page 2 minutes later then he removed it from his recent activity, and yesterday he did the same thing…he added this girl on facebook yesterday and it was in his recent activity then i go back to his page and he removed it. I’m just anxious because my internet is going to get disconnected really soon so i just wanted a chance to get to talk to him, i mean i was shocked because he never did that before, i’m usually the one who says something to him first and i guess because the last time we spoke was when i went up to him to tell him he made my night at prom when we danced together.

Why can't you just tell him that you like him? Send him a message that you do like him. Idk if that is the message you sent. Leave him your cell number or ask for his, since your internet is disconnecting. If not, maybe that is why he is acting clueless.

I think you're too obsessed with this guy.. just leave him a message or a picture comment every now and then, to show you care. Don't visit his page every day.

He could be feeling awkward with you doing all of this.. maybe you could option into leaving him alone and let him do what he wants. If he doesn't come to you, he isn't meant for you. Most crushes come and go.

Hope I helped & Good Luck

[view]

hi, i'v never acatualy done this before as I'm a straight A student and normaly have my life together. However recently this boy i liked asked me out. It's been going ok, dates are a bit awkward. I'm pretty sure the only reason he's dating me is because of appearance, he doesn't seem to be interested in what i say.
so i immeresed in contimplating of dumping him but i really like him and stuff so i'v decided not to. i'm travelling to europe for 4 weeks and if my relationship is just based on appearance for him then maybe this won't work. I thought i could get him to "really like" me for who i am but now that im going on vacation. i dont know, 4 weeks is a long time..

-female
14

A relationship shouldn't be based on just looks. It takes the attractive personality as well.

Then again, I wouldn't consider it one, because it seems obvious to me he is just using you for your looks. He seems shallow and selfish.

I would leave him if I were you. Find someone that will love you from the inside-out.

[view]

Sometimes i feel like giving up when something goes wrong. I am so depressed i don't have any close friends my boyfriend just broke up with me i don't know what to do???? HELP!!!!

Okay, you got mere advice. How about advice from previous experience?

For years, I was clinically depressed. I would overreact on every little thing, cry about it, or get upset about it -- whatever. Things just kept going wrong for me.. for years things kept going wrong. I attempted suicide multiple times and once I ended up in the hospital. I was put on meds, and had to seek therapy.

And, things got worse. My ex-boyfriend and I of 2 years broke up. I was hurt, I felt abandoned, used, everything you can think of. I was down and out, and didn't know how to get back up and get my positive attitude yet.

So many times I would lay there in bed, thinking of what people would do or say if I died, what would happen, would anyone miss me. So many times I often wondered why I am even here in the first place if all I ever endure is betrayal, shame, and hurt.

I had support of friends and family to keep me going. It was very tough, but they helped me get back up and start over. That is life.. you will fail, fail, fail, fail, and you'll keep failing until you get it. But the more you learn from your failures, the easier things will be. I learned that there are good guys and bad guys. I just chose a bad one. I need to look for a good one. Just like you! You need faith and support, and that is what family is for.

Just please don't give up. For not just me but for the whole advicenators community. I went through years of physical and emotional torture, and I am still going strong. You already seem strong, so keep that strength and keep going on with life. Don't end it over a temporary problem.

I wasn't doing well in school, I was an outcast, my depression hit its peak in high school. Times were tough.. and times will be tough sometimes. You just need to find good reasons to live! Be grateful you have a family, that you're better than the jerk you dated, and that you're strong.

If I can do it, you can do it. This will end sooner than you know. You will find friends, get an awesome man, and you'll be staying positive when you make a mistake. Live, Laugh, and learn.


Well, now things are doing wonderfully for me. Getting good grades in college, I got a nice guy, I have good friends. But it all took patience, positivity, strength, and determination. It's hard obtaining those characteristics when you're down, but think about what you learned, and develop from that. If you touched your hand on a hot stove, you know better not to do it again, right? Same principle. Just different circumstances.

Keep your head up, and if that guy comes back, say, "sorry, I don't date jerks." Let him go on with his life, if he left you chances are he isn't the one.

And I know it's frustrating when people tell you to stay positive, when it's hard right now. Yeah, it is. But like I said, it's always worth it in the end to keep your head up. When things tumble down, you'll still be at higher ground.

I hope I helped you. I will pray for you.

Take care, ok?

Leah

[view]

Hello. I am a female and I'm 14. I met my boyfriend a year ago but we have been dating for 4 months. We recently started having sex--we love each other. We do it because we love each other not for pleasure. Well anyway, we had sex a couple days ago. This is what my question is about: He ejaculated in a condom, waited a litte while, cleaned his penis off with soap and water, and tried sex without a condom. BUT he did not ejaculate without the condom. In fact, I only let him in there for about 15-20 seconds. I was wondering what you thought the chances of me getting pregnant from that are. I finished my period about a week ago, maybe a little more. So, I shouldnt be ovulating for about 5 days to a week. IF there was any sperm, it would have died in me,right? i heard that they cant last more than 5 days inside the vagina. Also, my boyfriend says soap kills sperm. He is sure I am not pregnant-I'm just worried! Help!

One question: Why didn't you use the condom the whole entire time?

Yes, there is a possibility of pregnancy cause you had unprotected sex. He may not of felt ejaculation, but he still could of, and you wouldn't know it.

Yet, if that was when he climaxed, then most of the semen discharged from that moment. I'd still risk chances of pregnancy. Always wear a condom.

Plus, you said two days ago. You didn't "get pregnant" yet. It takes a week to two weeks, and you won't know til the fifth week usually. You were out of your ovulation window, so that is better news, but still have a chance.

Be careful next time.

[view]

i'm really interested in starting cyber school but i can't seem to find one in my state! when i google it, most the links are for PA... can somebody help me find a cyber school thats approved for connecticut??

*if it helps at all, heres some info
- it needs to be for high school students
- i'm gonna be a senior this fall
- i prefer the school to be free, but if not, cheap

I'll be honest with you.

You are not going to find a free or cheap online school. You really won't. All of them will be pricey.

If you really want it like that, I would listen to the previous columnist and move to PA if that is really the only option.

Yet, you do have Stratford School.. it's nationwide, not just for Connecticut. They're relatively cheap, and you can graduate in months if you left high school previously or you're almost done.

A friend did that, and he got work done within a few months.

[view]

<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>
eXTReMe Tracker