DepthofHeart's advice column

There are some acne products that fade scaring, like proactive and products like that. Some aren't that expensive either and you can get them at regular stores, you might have to do a little research though. I can't recall the names of any.

::Jasmine::

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im one of those chics who are deathly pale and i really want some color, but i dont want to have to pay for the fake bake tanning beds so i bought jergens tanning lotion and the face lotion but im afraid to use it because i dont want to come out lookin orange after the 1st or 2nd time i use it.
does anyone know if it really works? and ive also heard that it has a really bad oder so is there any other products that doest have an oder?

It smells fine. I haven't used it, but some people I know have. It's not permanent either, so if you don't like it then don't use it again. It won't turn you orange though...if you get the right one.

::Jasmine::

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I am writing a movie script, which should be in production next year, and I need advice for a few of my teenage characters. It's been a few years since I have been a girl in high school and, although things were hard back then, I can only imagine the abundance of peer pressure you guys face these days. I want these characters to portray real life feelings. Say real life words that teenagers say. And react the way kids react in certain situations. By using your own or someone else's experiences I would appreciate advice on how girls and boys would act or respond if faced with situations such as:

GIRLS:
A girl and her boyfriend had sex for the first time then he breaks up with her a few days later. What would she feel or do? Would she consider doing something desperate? Is it no big deal? What reason would the boy give for breaking up with her?

Would a girl ever lie to her friends about being sexually active when really she's a virgin? If so, why is being a virgin so terrible to admit?

If a sexually active girl had an opportunity to go back in time and say no to sex, would she? Why, what would she have realized?

BOYS:
Do guys have any regrets about sleeping with a girl? What are they? Be honest.

What are some good lines a guy would say to have a girl say yes to sex?

And I really hope someone out there can advise me on this one...Are there guys who choose to refrain from having sex until they get married? Not because they can't get a girl, but simply because they choose to save themselves for their wife?

Thanks in advance.

1) Girls I know tend to feel more emotionally attached to guys they sleep with, and it's way harder for them to move on and let go, especially if they lost their virginity to said guy. So she might feel something like depression, betrayal, self-pity, angst...it's different for different girls. It depends on how attached the girl really is to the guy that broke up with her.

2) I know I tell my friends everything, if I was no longer a virgin then they would be the first to know. A girls friends...closest friends know a lot about her.

3) It depends on the situation, some girls lose their virginity to guys they loved and wouldn't take it back for the world. Some girls lose their virginty to guys they thought they wanted to be their first, but they didn't love. Those girls usually end up regretting it when the find someone they truly love.

I hope this helped.

::Jasmine::

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So when I went to the movies tonight, I kind of gave him a blowjob.

=/

Can I get pregnant?!!!

P.S. Don't lecture me about how slutty I am, because I'm not. Just please give me the info I need.

I don't think anyone wants to waste their time lecturing you, but are you serious? If you think you can get pregnant by swallowing semen, then I don't think you're old enough or mature enough to be giving head.

::Jasmine::

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how bad does a tatoo hurt? i know it hurts differently in different places. how bad does it hurt on your ankle, hip and lower back? i've gotten 4 piercings in my ears that i didn't think hurt much.

The pain is different for different people, some can handle more than others. A tattoo on your ankle hurts more than your lower back or hip.

http://tattoo.about.com/cs/pafterabvneck/a/090103.htm

::Jasmine::

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please help me im really confused about my sexuality. i came out to my family a few months ago but started to feel it was to soon. i really fancy a girl i know but seriously get aroused over men . when i masturbate i think of men too. what am i????

You might be bi-sexual, but that's not a bad thing...more potential significant others to chose from. (I really didn't know what word to use there) Or you may be a lesbian or even straight. I read somewhere that some girls are straight but sometimes have fantasies about girls or even develope crushes.

Some girl like girls and sometimes have fantasies about guys. I can't really tell you what your sexuality is though, sweetheart. That's something you'll have to figure out on your own, but whatever you are you're completely normal. And congratualations for telling your parents.

::Jasmine::

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Last night I was hanging out with this guy and I really was starting to like him. We've been pretty good friends the past couple of years but we've been hanging out alot more recently. We were laying in my bed then starting kissing... he's a horrible kisser. I'm not really sure what my question is. That just really threw me off and I'm all confused now. I really liked him but does anyone agree with me that being a good kisser is kind of a big deal? I'm not sure how I feel anymore or about what to do. We're both 15, turning 16 in a couple of months.

I agree with cheifbritneeilu, bad kissing is a big turnoff to me also. Mostly because I think if two people connect and really like each other then they won't go through the awkward kissing stage. If things are meant to be then they should fall into place naturally. It's your decison though, if you really still like him, then maybe you should give the kissing thing another try, don't make your decison based on guilt thoguh.

::Jasmine::

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15/f hello...well, recently in class, the people around me and I were discussing relationships. and then somehow...it got to "hookups." what's the difference? and also..how come when I told people that I've never had a hookup, their reaction was "O_O" lol...? are hookups considered bad or something? thank you in advance [=

Depending on age hooking up could mean sex, or just making out. Hooking up means no strings attached. There is no commitment to the other person. A relationship is when you're only with one person and you're fully commited to them.

::Jasmine::

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Okay, My names Jasmin, I'm 14 and live in Kentucky. I'm dating a guy named Chad, while I like a guy named James. Me and Chad's only been datin a couple of days, and I cant seem to get my mind off of James. I've dated James before and I'm inlove with him, or atleast I feel like I am.& I feel guilty if I date someone else, I feel like I'm doing him wrong. The thing is, we go to different schools, and we hardly ever get to see eachother, while me and chad go to the same school, my parents dont really approve of chad, and when i ask whats wrong with him they say look at his family? I'm like okay, not everyone turns out to be like their parents, which there isnt anything wrong with his parents, his dad just drinks occasionally. My father says chad wont work for nothin. My question is..what should I do, I love one, an Like another. I'm so confused.

I think you should be with the one you love. I know it may seem hard at times, to be so far apart, but it'll be worth it in the end. I think that if you stay with Chad you'll regret it.

::Jasmine::

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15/F

Okay so one of my best guy friends and I are always together. ALWAYS. He's like my brother but he likes me and sometimes when we play around, it comes off as flirting. Well there's this other guy I like who always runs into us in the hallways and he always sees us together so would it be a turn-off for him to see that I'm always with someone else and "flirting" or would it make him more competitive and want me more?

It would really depend on the guy. While one guy might just back off, the other would try harder to get you. My advice would be to flirt with the guy you like, don't try to make him like you be flirting with someone else.

::Jasmine::

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well i just got a boyfriend to day and i instantly cheated on him but i dont know if its really cheatin cuz the only thing i did was feel on someone else's dick but i don that to this guy all the time....lie on a daily basis! so is it still considered cheating?

Yes, what you did would be considered cheating on your boyfrined. I think you should be honest with your boyfriend, if you don't you'll just feel guiltly. So be honest and then ask for his forgiveness.

If he gives you a second chance...stay faithful. Your boyfriend deserves both honesty and loyalty, if you're not ready for that kind of commitment then maybe you're not ready for an exclusive relationship.

::Jasmine::

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I met a guy online last december{he's a marine corps}I knew that we loved each other we haven't met in person.we both have a strong feelings.all of our friends knew that.right now he is deploy in Iraq,he make a phone calls every three weeks and I still love him.I told him that I will want for him.He told me that after he get out of Iraq,he'll come and meet me in a person.I sure he like me alot.We talked about our family and everything.the problem is I dated with a guy last week and I think he's really into me.He told his friends that he's crazy about me.I like him too.but I not sure I really want him or not.cuz I have my military man.my military man,he has everything that I wanted from a guy.my date,he can give me a real kiss and hugs and everything...but i like my military man most...what should I do..please help..me

I have a couple of questions first: Is English your first language? And how old are you?

Anyway...you already answered your own question. You like the military guy the most, you should wait for him. It might be hard not having him there with you, but if you really love him then it'll be worth it in the end.

::Jasmine::

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after 7 months of dating, what is normal in a relationship? like should i start thinking about having sex with him or what?

There are no standards for a relationship. Some couples will have sex during their first week of going out, others will wait until they're married. Do what you feel comfortable doing, don't be rushed or pressured into doing anything you're not ready to do because you think you should be doing it. If you feel you're ready for sex then...mazel tov.

Best of luck,

::Jasmine::

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Haha jk I just needed a subject that would make people read this. here's the real problem-

okay well I went out this guy like a year ago and like a month later he broke up with me because his other friend liked me and him and his friends were like losing their friendships, and because he was always way to busy to have a girlfriend (that's what he said.)

but he never actually said he stopped liking me. so we went for like 3 months without really talking to each other.

then like 2 months after that we started flirting sooo much and you could just tell we liked each other, so we like hooked up and stuff and he was like oh maybe I'll want a girlfriend in the summer! and then the summer came and he was like I honestly don't want a girlfriend, but i still want to hang out with you so like we can still talk during the summer.

well I was SO angry because he totally like led me on and then said he didn't want a girlfriend so I didn't talk to him all summer and then when school started he asked me why i didn't talk to him and I said because I was sick of you wanting to be with me and then changing your mind and I just wanted to forget you. and he was like "ohh.. well I guess that's a good answer..."

and so anyways, now that we're in fully in school, we've starteed flirting a lot again!! I honestly have no idea what I should do because i still like him. he always makes my heart beat really fast and I think about him a lot but i just don't know what to do!! please help me!

You need to tell him to make up his mind, actually sit him down and talk to him. Ask him if he wants you as just a friend or a girlfriend, I'm guessing you don't want to be just a girl he hooks up with. He's leading you on and he's playing mind games and that's not fair to you at all.

If he just wants to be your friend then maybe you should cut back on the flirting and you shouldn't hook up with him, that will just complicate your already complicated relationship. If he wants a girlfriend and a reall relationship...then I guess your problems will be solved.

::Jasmine::

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tyler is my best friends and i think i might like him, but i don't want to mess up our great friendship. i know he likes me too. his girlfriend broke up with him because he said to her face quote on quote "she's much hotter than you'll ever be," he is sooooooo sweat though. i don't whether i should trust him though because he is so desperate for popularity that once he tole my firneds deepest secret to the "cool kids" ( who are a buch of assholes)

Well, he sounds like a very nice...jerk.

He might be very nice and sweet to you, but what is a relationship without trust? If he truly cared for you he would care more about you than his popularity, and it sounds like he wants popularity more than anything else. He sounds very immature, what kind of guy would break up with his girlfriend like that? That was a very not nice thing to do.

I think you should just stay friends with him, I agree with ygsgirl, you'll either end up losing him all together or end up with a broken heart. You need a guy who will put you before his social standing, and someone who will prove to you that you can trust them, right now Tyler is too immature to do that.

::Jasmine::

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Okay
My boyfriend cheated on me a while ago after we had been together for over a year.
It killed me to know that i had put my whole self into that relationship and he just couldn't be loyal.
We kept talking, don't ask me why, and i watched what i thought was him changing, and maturing.
So i took him back, and we've been together again now for about 2 months.
I love him with all i've got, and i want to make this work more than anything.
But i just can't trust him.
I get jealous when he's around other girls, and i get paranoid when he's out with friends, (some being girls) and i'm not there.
I don't want to be that annoying, obsessive, scary girlfriend, but i can't help it. The pattern is starting to repeat. He's acting like he did when he was cheating the first time.
I don't know if it's just me being paranoid, but i just can't find a way to trust him. No matter how much i want to. I don't know how to talk to him, because for some reason, IM scared of breaking HIS heart. And i don't know where to go from here...
Sorry if this is too vague,
Any advice would be amazing.
Thanks

Before you can trust him again you have to let yourself forgive him. I know what he did hurt you and that it's hard to forget, but if you want this relationship to work out then that's what you have to do. You have to forget what happened, move on, and truly forgive him. You have to put your faith in him, even though it may be hard. If and whe he proves he can be faithful it'll get easier.

::Jasmine::

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When i first met my boyfriend. I thought he was funny and just that kid back in middle school that i knew nothing about. I was SO shy back then. About 6 months passed by and I see him as someone I love to be around. Someone who i really care for. Months later, for some reason.. my feelings are changing. Whenever I look at him, he looks.. different. I don't know how to explain this but it's.. weird. I don't know what's wrong with me. He makes me so happy and he would do anything for me.. I would do anything for him. But whenever I look at him, I don't see him as someone I grew closer with.. it's something else.. Like someone I can live with.. who would take care of me when I'm sick and try to make me happy as much as possible. Does anyone know what's going on with myself? Lately, I have been so happy around him. So happy.. like in those romance movies and it happened so suddenly.. it seems weird!

I think that maybe you love him.

::Jasmine::

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Does anyone have like a list of like beanie babies (names) and how much they sell for today. I would also really like a location to sell them at but any info is okay!!! THANKS!!!!!! ps a website is okay too

Lord, I have a ton of those things. I got them all a really long time ago though. Here's a few websites.

http://www.bbtoystore.com/store/BB_Beanies.html

http://www.ty.com/BeanieBabies_home

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beanie_Baby

http://www.barrysbeanies.com/

If you want to sell them here's a site:

http://www.buyingbeans.com/

::Jasmine::

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From: What do you think?

Lara seems to be a little dreamy lately. Last night she was over at my dinner party I made for my friend Tiffany’s birthday. Lara talks to me for a while and I ask her to help me cut the chicken and then after she was done she sat at the bar of the kitchen. I started to cook the chicken and my mother helps me with the sauce. In the corner of my eye I see Lara staring ahead of the kitchen I felt like she was watching me, I turn around and she was focusing on some thing in the kitchen and she had that day dream face expression. At the dinner table Tiffany ask Lara if she is all right because she seems so quite than usual and she said in a dreamy tone “yeah I am just tired” but it seems like she was in a dreamy mood to me.

What do you think? And why was she like that?
Is it because of our conversation we had or what?

It probably is because of your conversation and also your current situation. Like I said, she has a lot to think about, give her some time. She'll come around, and eventually she'll make a decision.

::Jasmine::

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