|
| |
18/f
i'm one of those people that when i really want something, i fight for it.
so i'm still in love with my ex. he's going through a tonnn of shit right now and i guess he's just trying to find himself, if you could say. we talk and he confides in me...like he tells me things he said he hasn't told anyone, even his parents. he knows i'll always be there for him. you can say we're pretty good friends. howevvverrr, i always have to text/call him first. he never does it. and i've been trying to see him this week and he blew me off twice (the first time he was sick but then i texted him the day after and he said he was still sick) or maybe do you think he doesn't want to see me? we've broken up in the past before and hung out alot and ended up back together again for another 5 months...could this be the reason? he said he wants to be friends, andd he still tells me everythinggg. like i said, i'm a fighter for what i want, but i'm so confused :/ & i want him, alot. :/ (link)
|
If a guy wants to call you, he'll call you.
If a guy wants to hang out with you, he'll hang out with you.
It doesn't seem like he's feeling the same way as you do. It seems as if he's just giving you all his problems when he needs you and yet when you need him he's not there. I'm sure you're upset you haven'tbeen able to hang out right? Have you told him how you felt? And if so has he made up other excuses instead of being sick? The truth is though if I guy likes you he'll show you and he's not showing it from what you've said. I know what you mean by fighter...but sometimes you have to let things go...people come and go its how you deal with it! If I were you,you need to take care of yourself and just stop talking to him altogether because its just going to make things worse.
I'm sorry to hear about the break-up! I know how you feel it sucks but eventually things will get better!
|
My best friend of 6 years. Really did me wrong last night. She wrong on her statis on facebook. "mynamehere,Is a dirty slut & a liar"
Then all my friends started attacking it and writeing on it and curseing her out. but then she got mad, nd wrote all over my wall,4 paragraphs.On everything sexual ive done,My weight,nd alot of other stuff.I got so mad.Like so mad. Then for some reason my mother got in it.And started curseing on it. And all this 15 years olds didnt like it.So they were telling my mom to square up & what not.When i read all of this today.I was like how stupied can people be?
But any way.I really don't know what to do.i did talk to her cause her mom called the school and tryed to say that i started it when i had to proof she did.So were not friends anymore.BUt i kinda want to get back at her.Or will that let me down to her leval.What should i do? (link)
| |
You want her back? What kind of friend does that? That's not even a friend, clearly she has issues and wants attention by announcing what she feels on facebook. She sounds like oneof those girls who updates her status to get attention whether good or bad. Drop her as a friend altogether why would you give her another chance? She's much too immature and clearly she's a liar! You're better off...and to tell you the truth after reading this I was a bit pissed off. If anyone ever did that to me...forget the three strikes.... YOU'RE OUT!
|
|
I lost my best friend. He doesn't talk to me! What should I do? (link)
|
Ugh!
I can't even begin to tell you what experiences I've had with best friends. I recently lost one as well so I know how you feel. The best thing to do? Move on. Theres a reason why he or she is not in your life and a reason why they won't be in your future. It sucks believe me I know I wish there was a way to turn back time and erase the mistakes but when it comes down to it, it is what it is. I remember best friends saying "we'll always be friends" well that can't be promised because it will never be a sure thing if that person will continue to be in your life. I'm sorry to hear about you and your friend! Keep your head up! Its their loss not yours.
|
|
I saw in a question you said you gave up on singing. I was just wondering why did you do that? (link)
| |
A boy. I know it sounds so stupid. I could always go back to it I just never did...I always stuck around music just never started singing again. I was classically trained for four years and it was the best time of my life. As I had said in a previous question I'm thinking about starting to sing and possibly create a youtube channel just to see if I still have it in me.
|
|
I feel alone and lost. I'm scared there is so much happening to me that I don't know if I can stand it. Help? (link)
| |
You know things may happen in your life and I believe its a test to how strong you are or not. I watched the movie "Precious", she ahd so much trials in her life after every single thing she picked up herself and kept moving. It may be hard I'm not saying it won't but its how you handle it and its how you go about it. Hang in there and you know what later on in life you'll realize the things that have happened made you stronger. I would suggest going to talk to someone...talking to someone is getting because after you talk you realize the weight is a little bit off your chest. Stay strong! :)
|
|
My friend is getting skinnier and its scary me. She won't eat anything. Is there something that I can do? She's 15. And she thinks she's fat. (link)
| |
Well if you're really concerned you need to tell her to talk to someone and if she refuses you need to tell someone at school or even her parents. Its important that you don't ignore this problem!
|
|
What is music to you? (link)
| |
Music is a way of expression and its an art. Music has always been apart of my life and been there through good and bad times. I always have my iPod with me it never leaves my side!
|
|
How does heartbreak feel? (link)
| |
Ugh! Like a ton of bricks...you know when I was young I thought I actually thought I knew what love was but I didn't learn until recently. The answer to your question though yes it does it hurts quite a lot.
|
heyy i recently got a bf and my best friend is now acting all weird. i think its cos i have a bf now and she doesnt seem to like it or is jelous.
everytime i ask her to hang out she always blows me off by saying
"i dnt know i cant plan that far aheacd" or if i say "when can we hang out" she is always saying "i dno"
i try and i try and she just keeps being really cold towards me. i think she has given up. i dnt know what iv done.
she hasnt met my bf and thats becos he lives an hour away and i only see him a few nights a week so i have plenty of time to hang out with her.
im confused, wat should i do? i miss her. but she doesnt seem to care i just look stupid the more i try. help!! :( (link)
| |
Well you're right maybe she does feel hurt, that she maybe replaced, or even jealous that you have a boyfriend. Talk to her about it just ask her why she doesn't want to hang out. You should probably just hang out with her and not have your boyfriend tag along. I've been in this kind of situation and I know how your best friend feels she may feel like she's losing you so just talk to her about it!
|
17/F
How much sleep should I be getting? (link)
| |
I've heard the average person needs at least 8 hours of sleep!
|
My boyfriend and his ex girlfriend are always fighting. They fight about their past relationship and what went wrong. They fight because one of them will bring up their current love life and the other doesn't want to hear about it. I'm pretty sure this means that they aren't over each other, but don't really know it themselves and/or won't admit it. Does anyone know if this is like...a psychology term that happens a lot? What should I do? Please, any advice will help.
Thanks. (link)
| |
Honestly I'm not a psychology major but why are they even talking to each other still? Once a relationship is over, its over unless there is a possibility of the two people getting back together. Have you confronted him about this? Seems to me that there might still be feelings and right now their competing to make one another feel bad. You know when you get out of a relationship and apart of you is mad at the person so you want some sort of revenge on the other person it seems to me its something like that. Talk to him about it! Good luck! :)
|
Well I made this new guy friend named...Andrew.
We texted each other like everyday over Christmas break and he told me he liked me.
Suddenly he seems to like hate me though...he's always calling me a bitch and when I text him he asks if he knows me...wtf is his problem? Like out of no where he like, hates me..?
Am i too clingy or something? I'm pretty sure I'm not...I seriously haven't done anything to make him mad.
Btw this isn't the first time a guy has done this to me.
....wtf...
thanks. (link)
|
Guys are weird.
First minute they like you then the next minute their calling you names. My boyfriend is just like that! He was saying all this stuff about how "I'm a bad singer..." or something that hurt my feelings. Come to find out later he was like "I'm being mean to you because I like you." Some guysare like that they act like their in elementary or middle school...remember when the boys would poke you with a stick? Or push you? Well some boys play that game because thats how they get your attention. It could also be that you're not giving him enough attention....guys are different. Or maybe he's just flirting with you....who knows? Only way to find out is to be up front with him and get some information as to why he's acting so strange! Good luck! :)
|
|
hiya...i have been single 4 1 month after being with my ex boyfriend 4 4 and a half years...it wasnt a perticular good relationship and it should of ended sooner..when we broke up i think i kind of craved male attention as i didnt get this from my ex and i slept with 2 or 3 people..however i met this new people when i was out in clubs and that...im just a bit worried now cos every guy i have met is just after sex? im not saying i want a relationship cos its way too soon..but im worried that these guys are all the same and i wont find anybody who i really like..and the nice guys who seem interested in gettin to know me who arent after sex im just not attracted too? i dont know if i wil ever find the right person 4 me? im 20 (link)
|
I'm sorry to hear about your break-up!
Well I would relax if I were you...you may want that attention but the guys your with might not being giving you the attention you want. I would wait and sit back and think what you really want and who would be a guy you could lean on for comfort. Maybe you have a guy friend...(you don't have to hook-up) that you can talk you or cuddle with. I have some guy friends that I flirt with and there are no strings attached. Point is, is that these guys you meet aren't doingyou any good...that attention isn't something that is going to make you feel better. You'll eventually find someone its just going to take time. My best friend just got out of a relationship for 4 years as well and she doesn't think she will ever find someone. I told her that there are so many guys out there and that you have to just relax and have fun. I believe that everyone will fun that special someone! Good luck! :)
|
f/17
i have this friend and as u might have read'ed in my last question she makes me talk and text this guy she likes i don't like him very much but hes okay he made up some lie about haven a girl friend so that i would stop asking if he liked her so now she says shes over him but now i got a bigger problem she thinks he likes me and that i like him i don't like him and im sure he likes her not me but one day when i was standing in the hall it was just me him and her she walked away cause she got a phone call and i was just standing there looking at her then out of nowhere i feel some one hold waist and go up to my ear and say excuse me i turn around and he smiled i just looked at him like wtf then he just walked away she saw that and now thinks i like him and that he likes me cause he only talks to her when i there and when there alone hes always like look at her and i just don't know what to do or say im sure he doesn't like and i dont like him i think (link)
| |
As I have said in other advice no man is worth giving up a friendship for. I'm serious my friend and I had a conflict due to a guy and thats all we would fight about and then it got complicated. It got to the point where we almost ended the friendship due to how many fights we were having. Trust me its not worth it, if you really care about your friend forget this guy there will be plenty more.
|
18/m
Im in college. Me and my girlfriend were long-distance. we saw each other over summer but waited six months until we visited again last week. during that six month waiting period I gradually went from being in love with her to to not really enjoying talking to her for too long. I thought that when we saw each other again in December that things would be better but they were not. Im not sure If I was just over-worrying or if I genuinely didn't enjoy my time with her because there were times when we had a lot of fun, we were laughing and joking and getting along. but other times, I couldn't enjoy myself because I was too worried about how much I would miss her when we parted.
Because things didn't get much better, I decided that maybe it would be best if we went our separate ways. I had already decided that if things weren't better when we were together again that I would break up with her. We were best friends is the thing and we're still on good terms with each other so its not like I can't talk to her, but I just think I need a buffer. She has completely respected my personal space since I told her I needed it, so its she's not the problem. I'm just having a hard time dealing with not talking to her. Im not sure if I really miss her or if I really miss not having someone there but Its one of those two. I don't feel like I could get back together with her because I think things would still be all crappy. I just don't know what to do. Is it a bad Idea just to call her to talk for a few minutes? We are still friends. She would like it if I called Im sure.
If someone maybe has a good way of dealing with this loneliness or something because I really don't want this to affect my studies.
Thanks (link)
|
I'm in the same situation right now with my ex. We were in a long distance relationship and he couldn't handle it...there were a lot of "I miss yous" and "I wish you were heres". You need to be honest with yourself but also with her its great your on good terms with her but you need to support each other through this hard time. I was best friends with my ex and now unfortunately I decided I didn't want him in my life anymore.
Well think about it this way...does she make you happy? Why do you let distance get between you? If you love her so much distance shouldn't be an issue. You shouldn't reflect on the "missing her" part...don't dwell on the sadness. I'm sure you both have great memories with one another and the fact that you are thinking about the "missing her" part even while you're hanging out with her is just making the situation worse. Things would only be "crappy" if you let them...their crappy because you reflect on the sad parts too much!
You should think about what you want and need before giving her a call because she might have mixed feelings with you calling!
Number one rule: worry about your studies first...just work thats what I do! I put my whole heart and soul into my work and try to accomplish daily tasks as well! Good luck!
|
|
i'm really thinking about going down south for college. (i live in ct right now) the reasons for this is because my boyfriend, the love of my life who i've been dating for the past 3 years broke up with me...i've been hurt in my life but this time i was completely broken. what makes it even harder for me is knowing that he's going through depression. he's become suicidal because of his parents getting divorced and his mom cheating. i feel absolutely terrible and i told him i'd always be there for him. however things are hard because he lives a half hour away from me but he knows he can talk to me, and he does. i feel bad saying this but his depression has kind of rubbed of on me. i've been having suicidal dreams lately and i'm not happy where i am. i hate the cold and i hate the life i'm living right now. i'm just not happy. things remind me of him and how we used to be so happy together. i think that maybe if i go to school down south i can start a whole new life and i won't be reminded of me and my ex being together as much. i will still be his friend and i'll still talk to him and be there for him but i need to start something new. i want a new life and i want to be happy. and i love beaches and warm weather. do you think i should go? (link)
| |
Its really up to you...then again you can't have one person make you feel this way. You have the right to control how you feel by what you do in your daily routine. When my ex broke up with me I was heartbroken and thought I was lost...but it made me realize how I have to control how I feel. I think you need to start fresh and you need to do whatever that maybe. Maybe you just need to get away from him because his depression is rubbing off on you. Maybe you should talk to someone at school, your parents, or even your friends. It sounds to me as though the kid has baggage which is unfortunate but their not your problems to deal with and its too much to ask of someone. You need to do whats best for you and whats going to make you happy in the long run! Good luck!
|
18/F
So recently I've pulled 3 gray hairs out of my head, and it's brown and has highlights from the sun so I doubt that they're just blonde, I'm sure they're gray. Is this normal? Anyone else experience this? Is my whole head gunna become gray soon? I don't want gray hair at a young age.
HELP!!!! :(:(:(
--scared (link)
|
Dear Scared,
I know many people that get gray hairs or even white hairs had the end of the teenage years its perefectly normal. Some don't get hairs until their 30 it really depends on the person because everyone is different. If you're really worried just dye your hair or put more highlights in it.
|
I love singing but i don't think I'm all that great at it. haha I want to be though..anyways that can help me without spending thousands to get voice lessons? Plus i have no clue how to get them where i live. So any ideas?
thanks in advance (link)
| |
Well if there are any clubs at schools or maybe a church nearby. Joining a choir is the first step to singing....when you can sing and harmonize with others its the one of the basic steps. From the choir there may even be more opportunities! Or maybe join a local community theatre in your area look in a newspaper or online of things in your area I'm sure you'll find something having to do with singing. Good luck! :)
|
Hi!
My dad's turning fifty and my brother and sister and I are trying to create a video for his birthday that covers his life, ups and downs, and has some bits and pieces of people talking about him. sort of like the documentaries you see online... I am not too sure how to go about this and was wondering if anyone had any ideas!
Thanks :) (link)
| |
Well you can make a video from Windows Movie maker with his favorite song with pictures of you guys and him or maybe pictures of him from when he was a baby to now. If you have a camera maybe do some interviews with your family...like "E True Hollywood Story" documentary. Sounds like fun! Good luck! :)
|
I really don’t believe that posting this or any other problem on the net will REALLY help, cos either way, I’m gonna feel the same etc..
But I’m trying to do anything here, maybe ranting to strangers will help, I don’t know!
I don’t want any sympathy, I JUST WANT HELP. I’m sure you get a lot of posts like this here but please don’t give me cliche lines like ‘things will get better’ , ‘You’ll feel better in time’ or ‘You have people who care about you’ …..It will be a waste of your time.
If anyone does have any suggestions that genuinely will help, then I’d really appreciate that..
I am beyond the point of feeling bad…I’m just completely past it. I feel like RUBBISH absolute rubbish EVERY SINGLE DAY. I went through some crappy depressive periods as a teen,a ll of which I got over, but this is unbearable.
I think really bad thoughts, about just ending it, ending everything, which results in me feeling really selfish, and I feel horrible for even considering doing something like that to the few people who care about me…..I mean, I’ve even gone to the lengths of planning the whole thing out, where it would happen, how it would happen, what I’ll say to people I’ll leave behind. It’s gone to the extent that, anything I say, or things other people say, stick in my head and I think, ‘I wonder will they remember me saying this and see it as something more when I’m gone’ or people say something completely innocent and in my mind, there’s only one thing it can relate to, and that’s thinking about how I’ll finish myself off..
In one way I don’t want to be a coward and just give up on life and take the easy way out, when many people have it worse, but I honestly cannot help it, there are some days when I come SO close to doing something, I actually really genuinely scare myself. I don’t talk to other people, and I won’t. I’m not that kind of person, I know you’re probably gonna say ‘It will help to get it off your chest’, well, that’s why I’m doing it here. I cannot talk to people, even the people that I used to be absolute best friends with, I barely talk to anymore.
At that, even WHEN I talk to them (or anyone) I act really, really happy.. Like TOO happy, I just have too put it on so much cos I never, ever feel like talking to anyone, or participating in things that everyone else loves doing I just, I know it’s really sad, but this is something that I cannot help, despite trying for years… I’m always the one that laughs the loudest, and seems to be having the most fun, when I really have to just..stop myself from crying and really try and seem happy, when I feel like **** inside.
I don’t wanna go all depressive cliche here but I have to be as honest as I can so, sorry.
Every tiny thing pisses me off, and since I’m never happy and I fake being happy SO much, that every now and again I just snap and can’t pretend anymore and then everyone’s like, why are you sad, you’re always so happy…
I always pass it off as just ‘a bad mood’ or ‘one of those days’ and no one knows that I feel like this ALL THE TIME. Everything irritates me, I get angry at everything, I can barely stand ANYONE I know anymore, not even my family.
I just feel like I want to be away from everyone, and I feel almost jealous when someone else talks about their problems to me, cos I know I can never do that… I know that’s irrational …. but so is a lot of this.
I just feel crap, and I’m fed up of going through the extremes of faking to be really ecstatic every day, and then really, really depressed the rest of the time.
I genuinely feel like I can’t do it anymore.
I don’t fear for myself as much as I used to, there has been times (one in particular) where I really felt like I was going to end my life, I felt like I had to.
But I didn’t, I got over the absolute extreme of it, and back to feeling extremely glum every day, rather than suicidal.
But now and then, I feel it coming back. That feeling creeps back in sometimes, and I do things to take my mind off it but nothing does.
I’m safe for now, but I do know for a fact that someday, the one ending my own life will be me.
For now, I just needed to let this all out somewhere….You can judge all you want, it won’t bother me.
Thanks for reading all this, any of you that are and sorry it’s so long and probably going to put a downer on you all, but that’s what this place is for I guess..I also apologise if some of this is uncomprehendable, I kinda just typed whatever came to my mind so..
Another thing, this isn’t OVER anything, there isn’t any major events that may have triggered this, in the past few years I’ve gone through about six funerals, all of very close friends/ family, and I got through it. It isn’t because of that, or the fact that I don’t get on with some people. It’s not over some stupid guy that dumped me, like a lot of the posts I see here, I’m not that naive.. So don’t ask if there’s anything that could have triggered this, I’m just like this for no appearant reason, and have been for many, many years…It’s just, the last few months it’s gotten way, way worse to the point all the above is happening… I mean, today, I feel pretty down, but compared to what I usually feel, this is normal for me. I haven’t felt like going out, or talking to anyone, and this is one of the good days.
I’m fine right now, but I KNOW for an absolute fact that if I don’t do something, I’m gonna be back where I was a few weeks ago, planning my own end, thinking about how it will happen, thinking about how much I want it to happen.
I don’t want to be like that, I don’t WANT it to happen that way.
I can feel myself getting like that again sometimes, and I NEED to do something, before it gets too late, not to sound dramatic or anything, but that’s literally how it is. Please don't suggest going to the doctor or anything cos it isn't really an option for me, besides the fact that I'm not comfortable about going on medication so early in my life, I don't want to depend on drugs to stay happy for the rest of my life..
Anyway, I’ll leave it at that.. Thanks in advance for help.
Signed,
Desperate :’( (link)
|
Dear Desperate,
I knew a girl she was beautiful who was the life of the party and she made everyone feel welcome. I'm very shy but she would always make sure to say "hi" to me everytime she saw me with a big smile and she would be so welcoming. Last July she killed herself. I was so affected by this my whole community was because she had made an impacted and she didn't even know it. Right now, I always question why was she so unhappy and why did she do it? Sadly we'll never know.
I understand where you are coming from I've had dark times...and sometimes I still do but then I rememember I have a lot going for me and how exciting it is to see what's up on the road ahead. I know you don't want people telling you to talk to someone I didn't either until finally one day it hit me that I had to and its helping a bit. I go through my times but when it happens I think of that girl who took her life. I think of how you upset and hurt so many people and how she made this big whole in everyones hearts. Truth is no matter how much you feel like letting go you can't...if you didn't want help or advice you wouldn't have posted. I can say everything in the book the cliches of "Seek help or advice", "Talk to your parents", or "Talk to your friends/ teacher". The thing is you might not follow the advice I've given you. If you want help you'll get it but not by my terms but by your own. What its going to come down to to is if you want to change the situation? You can change your hair, your clothes, your make-up, or where you live and you're still going to feel the way you do.
I wish I could have told this to the girl I knew I wish I could have said one thing to her to make her know that she wasn't alone and that she didn't have to do what she did. Once you take your life like that theres no coming back and theres no second chance. You need to do whats right for you! If you need to talk about anything please write me! Good luck!
|
|
