Member Since: May 3, 2011
Answers: 1053
Last Update: December 12, 2012
Visitors: 30977
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I'm 17 and I have just graduated highschool and I have found out i'm pregnant. Me and my boyfriend want this baby very much and my mom told us she'd be strong and supportive which she hasn't been she just wants us to get an abortion and say's were too young, although we're truly not . He's 18 turning 19 this year and i'm turning 18 this year . My mom says she told my dad & I asked her what'd she say , and all she could do is look at me disgusted how she has been this whole time since we for sure found out that I am pregnant and say he's upset/ mad something like that . I haven't talked to my dad I've been avoiding him and now I'm sitting up in my room bc I don't want to see or talk to him . We had planned to talk all together today, but my mom told him and can't even tell me what he's said . I don't know what to do or say . My boyfriend's mother is very happy and understanding but my parent's aren't at all . It's so annoying because this situation is not going to change so I don't understand why anyone's making a big deal . So what should I tell my dad if he decides to spark up a conversation with me about it if I have to leave my room before he leaves . I am very scary I know .. (link)
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Your brain will keep developing until you're 25, so you aren't intellectually or emotionally mature yet. One of the consequences of that is that teens make rash decisions because they are so present oriented.
Moreover, both your parents are indicating that they are not into helping you raise your child. If you can't deal with abortion, which I would personally advise you to have, then please, please, please think about putting the kid up for adoption. Neither you or your boyfriend are ready for this economically, let alone psychologically. The introduction of an infant and its almost constant need for attention is going to throw a monkey wrench into the chemistry you and your boyfriend have, which will make it even less likely you will stay together.
So again, either have an abortion or, if you decide to take the pregnancy to term, put it up for adoption. Your child will thank you and it will be better for the viability of your future, no matter what guilt feelings you may have at the thought.
Step back and try to think about this RATIONALLY, okay?
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What do you do if you think you have appendicitis?
I think I have appendicitis. I always feel sharp pains in my stomach and shoulder. It hurts really bad. I went to the doctor and she said it might be appendicitis. They gave me some nexium pills but sometimes they don't work. I feel sharp pains in my stomach side and my shoulder. It hurts really bad.What do I do?
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Go back to your doctor and do it NOW! A burst appendix can have serious health consequences, including peritonitis, which can actually be fatal.
You could go to an emergency room, but you may have to wait a while while they take care of those in more urgent need.
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So there is this guy at my work. At first I didn’t think much of him, just a coworker, but then I got invited to one of his get togethers, and there I started to see what a great guy he is. We all had a lot of fun, his mother loved me and his friends said that he really likes me too. At the same time my guy barely talks to me. I have cut him looking at me a few times, but he never texts me or calls me. Since then we have hang out a few times and had a lot of fun yet he never makes the first move. How do I get him to take control and make the first move? (link)
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Why don't you make the first move?
Look, guys are target directed. That means that he wasn't going to hang out with you unless he had some kind of designs on getting with you. He also isn't going to think you're a slut or something if you take the initiative. So relax, ask him if he wants to take your relationship to a higher level and enjoy.
There is one other thing about this: by having to make the advance you will understand better what guys go through in terms of fear of rejection. So just go for it. You don't get unless you ask.
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I'm 5'4.5" and around 120lbs, however, in my opinion I'm horribly overweight! I eat pretty well and exercise when I'm not running around doing school work or just working at my job (where on my feet for at least 8 hrs a day). So my question is would I be better off losing a couple of pounds? How can I get skinny since I'm clearly not now? (link)
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Heed this comment!
Women are built to have a certain amount of fat on them. It is the thing that gives you boobs, a butt and hips that help draw men to you and make you so pleasantly soft when we hug you. At almost 5'5", 120 pounds is about right. So since you are in the zone you can erase weight off your list of issues.
No man likes hugging a skeleton, which overly thin women pretty much are. They have no boobs, no butt and are generally miserable to date because they can't enjoy anything they eat. Give me a normal weight or chubby girl anyday! Yum!
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I am crying so bad as i right this i feel horrible right now, so my boyfriend looked at porn and i found out about a year and a half ago and i came online for help because i have such a low self esteem and i felt like i was not good enough when he did this. But when i came online everyone said it was normal well all the guys of course which makes sense for them to stick up for themselves ... then we started having less pleasurable sex but i thought at least we had sex and still i came online and asked if it it was normal but like always guys said it was supposedly normal...then he couldnt get hard by me at all..and we couldnt have sex and i did not why..and i was gonna break up with him, because it was the tenth time of his softness (by that i mean not being able to get hard) it was two days before valentines but on valentines day he asked me to see him since we've been together for 4 yrs almost an i agreed ...and we had sex and i asked him why he could and he said it was because he hadnt jacked off to pornography so we got back together and sometimes he got hard and sometimes he didnt but like always i looked up online and online it said it was probably stress and ect but not my fault and i tried to think i wasnt the reason for it i wasnt the reason he could not get hard because i have always been very depressed and suicidal and im afraid thinking that will just get me off the edge so anyway he stopped looking at it cause i got birth control and he could ejaculate inside of me and thought that was way better than jacking off ...i rarely have my period because of birth control but i had my period this week and he was jacking off my to breasts and ejaculating on me since i couldnt have sex but it baffled me that he could get hard everyday this week because i thought the problem was that he would jack off...but now i get it the problem was me because when he looked at porn then looked at me & couldnt get hard because the girls there are increadibly good looking and i admit im chubby i weigh 170 am 5 4 and i have 36D breasts and a normal size butt but a sort of chubby stomach and i just feel horrible because i asked him this and he said yes i think thats why..so this whole time it was me and i got to be honest i just feel like killing myself now that ive found this out..like i asked him so like after you saw them and then you saw me you didnt find me attractive? and he admitted yes but yet the whole time he couldnt get hard i would sob because i noticed like he would only get hard for a little while then i would try to get him in and he would get soft like after i took my clothes off and i felt horrible but he swore it was because he jacked off not because of me but if that was the case wouldnt he be getting soft now?! :( i just feel horrible cause i have horrible unreachable standards ill never be as good looking as them and i cant get this horirble thought of my head that the whole time it was me who couldnt get him up!!! :( :( :( (link)
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Darlin', there are seven billion people in this world, so seven billion different ways of looking at the world and the people in it.
The dude is a porn addict. It has nothing to do with you. I mean, there are actually married guys who still jack it to porn. I don't get that myself, but each to his own.
He insulted you as a cover for his addiction. Now keep in mind that I look at porn, too, so I'm definitely not one of those nuts who is opposed to it. I just know an addict when I see one.
So what you do is drop this guy and seek out other men because if he liked you then there are other guys who would get in line to be with you. The takeaways from this experience is to first set boundaries, no porn while you and your new guy are together (this is one that I do voluntarily with new women); two, know what your deal breakers in a relationship are and strictly enforce them; three, don't internalize everything as your fault because often it won't be. Other folks are capable of being douchebags or just flat out dishonest or stupid.
Love yourself, try to relax and look at things rationally so you don't overthink yourself into an emotional pretzel. You will have other failed relationships, but they will help you arrive at your last relationship when you will finally find a partner who you can be with happily for the rest of your days. It's all about the learning process.
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I haven't had a boyfriend in two years, and there's a guy that I like, and he might even ask me out. I also haven't had my first kiss yet, and every time I say it to my friends, they're shocked. What should I do? (link)
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Relax. It will happen in its own time. The only advice I can give you about helping things along is to remember that guys are really dumb about reading signals from girls. You almost have to put up a flashing sign that says, "hey, ask me out, will ya?" on it. So be obvious about showing your interest. Touch him a lot, compliment him and tell him you like hanging out with him. Rub up against him, slap him on the butt, be playful.
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Is it harmful to swallow semen?
My wife is concerned about health issues. (link)
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There is actually such a thing as esophageal gonorrhea and throat cancer caused by HPV (human papaloma virus). So there is a possibility that STD's can be passed from semen.
But barring that, semen is safe to swallow.
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my gf wants to suck my penis &want to drink sperms will she get pregnant (link)
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Total troll post.
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Hey :B I'm in eighth grade and 14.
Last week, I was at my friend Emily's house and her little brother had his friends over. Amongst them was a 12-year-old boy called Cody in 5th grade. He was really cute, the kind of kid you KNOW will be hot when he gets older ;)
So later that day, he added me on Facebook and has not stopped talking to me since. He goes to my school, and I see him around sometimes but there's no time to stop and talk.
I'm not trying to sound full of myself or anything, but I think that he has a crush on me? Because
- he always starts the conversation first
- at school if he sees me, he smiles and waves
- on Facebook, if I ask him a question, he's always like, "oh, I'll tell you tomorrow if I see you"
- if I don't see him at school one day, he messages me, "i didn't see you today :( "
- he told me that he had been held back a year in kindergarten and how he's supposed to be in sixth grade, and how sixth grade and eighth grade arent really that much of a difference :>
- He asked me to go over to Emily's house again one day so that he could meet me there
- he asked me if I was busy this weekend and if I could go to our school baseball game to watch him play
- if there's an awkward pause in the conversation, he's the one who goes , "soo, whats up?" come on talk!"
It's really cute and sweet and all. I think I may be starting to like him as well:/ I'm always thinking about him, the song that he told me was his favorite soon became my favorite, and I'm online more often in hopes that he'll come online :P
But it's just wierd dating a kid like, three grades down and I just, I dont know. I'm confused:/ What should I do from here? (link)
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There is a HUGE maturity gap between a 14 year old and an 11 year old. And it will widen as you move into high school. So any relationship between you two will be doomed.
The legal stuff another commenter brought up can be tricky. America is so panicky about sex that they sometimes this country loses all sense of reason.
So do yourself a favor and give his overtures a miss.
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16/f, NY
So a few months ago, I was at the mall and I filled out some magazine sweepstakes or something, and there was a box that asked if I was interested in modeling/acting opportunities. am pretty sure I didn't check that box Then, yesterday, I got a call from a lady from the New Faces modeling agency saying that I did check the box and that she was interested in meeting me and possibly booking me. She said that the talent scout at the mall 'saw something in me' and was interested. But the talent scout never said anything to me at the mall. The lady who called me invited me to a private event for an interview just to talk at a hotel in my area. To be honest, I'm very nervous because I'm not really as thin as models usually are. I'm worried that she's going to be expecting me to be some skinny gorgeous girl, even though I'm not that skinny (I'm not chubby/fat) and I'm just tall. I'm scared that I'm going to show up and it's going to be full of skinny-minny girls who are all gorgeous soon-to-be models. I still have to let her know by tonight if I want to meet with her, but do you think I should do it? I don't want to go there and embarrass myself. Help :-/ (link)
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All those magazine things are scams. Never, ever give your private information to anyone unless you absolutely have to.
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are cigars addictive like cigerattes? are they AS addictive? will one have me hooked? thanks (link)
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I have no idea. But they can cause mouth and throat cancer just like cigarettes can. Plus they smell like horse manure.
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Well, my story is a little complicated, but it goes like this...I have been dating a guy for a while now and I believe we are a good match. We laugh together, we can have fun together, I can totally be myself when I am around him. I am so in love with him. It may be crazy to say, but I could see myself marrying him. There is just one thing getting in the way of my happiness...my ex. Everytime I am with my boyfriend, I am always comparing him to my ex (not out loud of course). Sometimes I think about my ex when my boyfriend and I are together and I just can't shake it. I am come to realize that I am jealous of my ex's new girlfriend, I'm not sure why. I wasn't with my ex as long as I have been with my current boyfriend and I know my ex and I will never work out, so why am I wondering how things would be different if we were still together? Why do I always look for him in the crowd? How can I get over him??? (link)
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This is easy:
Women compete with each other for attention. What this does is make them jealous of each other and you may feel that you lost him to her. The most constructive thing you can do is short circuit this by being rational about it and finally moving on. You can't change your relationship situation so you might as well be happy with what you got. We can't be greedy and controlling because those are signs of insecurity.
Keep life simple. Don't overthink, don't compete with other women and don't let anyone sabotage how you want to lead your life. Take control and rock on.
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I had my baby girl about 4 months ago. I didn't have any tearing or anything that they found. However, she was stuck under the pelvic bone for several hours, resulting in 3.5 hrs of pushing. I am trying to find out what can be wrong ...it is still a SEVERELY painful thing for my husband and I to try and have sex. It's making my self esteem horrible and me upset knowing that we can 't or if we do it's painful. It almost feels like the underside of the inside just inside is bruised or damaged..I get horrid pains when it hits that area, it feels like its smaller and hitting something now...which doesn't make sense..you'd think it would be quite the opposite. Also, that skin that is at the back/bottom of the vagina (before the perineum) is extremely sensitive...Can something be wrong? (link)
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One thing at a time.
First, let's take care of the pain issue. See a gynecologist and he/she will be able to answer your questions in a fuller way than we could.
Also, the recovery time from a pregnancy differs depending on the individual. I know you feel an obligation to your husband to attend to his needs, but it is your body. He will just have to wait for vaginal intercourse for a little bit longer. It isn't your fault plus it doesn't help that you now have an infant whose needs have to be attended to frequently on a daily basis, which is stressful.
Once the pain is alleviated, then you guys can start having regular sex again. But what I think you should do is have your mom babysit the infant for a weekend while you and hubby have a little getaway so you can have some relaxing private time. Then you will comeback refreshed in both body and soul.
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I was really angry when I was shaving and SHAVED off this huge chunk of skin near my ankle!
Down to buisness here, I had to wait a long time after putting on some pressure to stop the bleeding and then sprayed on some Poly on the Go. An hour later I stuck a bandage on.
Every day when i'm about to shower I take off the bandage, shower, dry it and place on a new bandage.
It's been a weke now and today really sucked because I was removing my bandage and the whole wound stuck on it so i had to peel the bandage off and of course it was bleeding again and looked the exact same as the first day!
This sound as if it's the first time I've goten hurt or something but honestly I haven't gotten hurt since I was like 10? And even though the diameter is about the size of my thumb it hurts so bad and I feel like i'm dying! I don't know what else to do! (link)
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Go see a doctor to make sure you don't end up with a staph or other infection. If you are still a teenager, go to the school nurse.
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So there's this guy in my school and he's a year older than me. i'm 15 and he's 16. i'ved liked him for 3 years and like a month ago i said "heyy." to him on facebook, but he didn't me ook at say anything back, but he did tell all of his friends, cause they look at me constantly. Then he pointed my out to a couple of friends and said "yeah that's her." why would he do that? and he knows i like him, and he always stares at me everyday. i need help, do you think he likes me, or not? i mean he knows how much i like him, and this isn't just a crush. its something more. so please give me some advice, thanks. :) (link)
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Teenage insecurity. It happens. Don't worry about it. Just walk up to him directly and ask him if he is telling his friends good things about you. If he says yes, ask him what he thinks those things are. Then you reciprocate by complimenting him. That should warm things up.
Also, don't be so focused on this guy that you miss out on other boys who might also like you.
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I like this boy and I hear he likes me too and by the way we are 13 I'm a girl and we are friends and talk and stuff and I wanna kiss him sometime maybe and I'm nervous and people keep telling me "oh dont be, I'm sure he's just as nervous" Or "don't worry he hasnt his first kiss either, he doesn't no what to do" except he's told me people he's kissed and made out with so I'm afraid he's good and I won't be. I really like him and i wanna kiss him but Im too nervous. All advice helps! Thanks ! (: (link)
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Kinda weird that a guy is telling a girl he likes who he has swapped spit with in the past. Really dumb. I have never heard of such a lame thing.
Anyway, guys are really dumb about girls in reading their signals. You more or less have to make things really obvious so that an insecure teenage guy will feel comfortable in busting a move.
However, I concur with an earlier commenter, too: getting tied down at your age doesn't really make much sense. You are in the exploratory, learning phase of your life and therefore it is more important you get involved with as many different kinds of people as you can, whether that is dating them or just hanging out with them. Your sensibilities are still evolving and by the time you reach your mid-20's they are going to be radically different from what they are now. So relax, don't be in such a hurry to put an anchor around your neck and enjoy life!
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I'm 19..Ok well this is the story. I was with my previous boyfriend(lets say is name is lenny)for 4 years until I went off to college and we ended up breaking up 3 months(october/november) into the school year. Things weren't officially over until january.
At the beginning of the school year i met a new guy friend(casey) and we meshed well. once me and lenny were officially over, one night i cried to casey about lenny and i came to find out that casey was going through the exact same thing as me. he was trying to let go of an ex and we found comfort in each other (sounds like a rebound i know, but honestly once meant to be that way). a month into us becoming closer we ended up dating. things were amazing! after about a month things started getting rocky. we were on and off and he was the one always ending it(he confessed he was scared i would hurt him). He was constanly going back home to dallas during this time.
we finally took a good break and ended up getting back together once the summer started. we were having a long distance relationship as he was from dallas and i stayed in austin for the summer instead of going back to houston. casey told me he had never loved someone so quick and wanted to get married after college.
one weekend things got really bad between us and he ended it( as always using the excuse of him feeling i would hurt him because i had so many guy friends). i ended up asking him if he still loved his ex girlfriend(i always felt she was the reason why he left), he said yes and i confessed I was also still in love with lenny(at the time i felt i still did). I told him "maybe we're better off being back with our exs" he just said "we do"
I stupidly insisted in him trying to get her back since i thought i wanted luis. I could tell casey was sketchy about going back to her but since he saw i was still in love with lenny he would return to her. He called her that day and met up and got back together. I also tried doing the same with lenny but i had hurt him to much and he said it wouldnt be a good idea.
I had decided that i would drive to houston and get lenny back(i knew if i talked to him in person i would). after really thinking i decided i didnt want lenny because he wasnt going any where in life. he was just stuck in our little community and i needed to better myself. throughout this process of me trying to get lenny back, casey was there for me. I ended up realizing that casey was the one i really loved but it was too late to get him back since he was back with his ex. (casey is the type of guy that once ends the relationship he will no longer talk to the girl. he doesnt cheat and always does the right thing) because of this i was scared he would kick me out of his life completely, but i understood. it ended up being that casey still wanted to text me and have me in his life. one night i confessed that i felt i was the "other girl" and i put an end to it and stopped all contact with him.
a few days later, he contacts me and is upset on how i can forget about him so easily. I was only trying to do the right thing no matter how much i loved him. He's tore in between us two. he's in love with her and is in love with me too. he can no longer leave his girlfriend because he went back into her life and cant just leave again because it would be wrong.
I'm afraid when school starts again and he comes back to austin, that he's going to come looking for me again and i wont know if its just because its convienant to him or because he'll realise that he really wants me. what do i do? i'm trying to be a women about this because i dont want to hurt anyone. (it might sound as if casey is a douche bag, immature and doesnt know what he wants as of now but he's a great guy. he taught me that i want an educated man in my life that has goals. I wish he would realise that about his girlfriend(she's not educated and it bothers him)) should i move on or really fight for him? or has the girlfriend already won the battle? i'm sorry its so long but i need some counseling from y'all.
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First, you were right about Lenny. He isn't ready to leave home, yet, either emotionally or physically.
The truth is Casey doesn't know what he wants. He would actually like both of you but realizes that isn't going to fly. And he now has a kind of moral obligation to his current squeeze.
What this does for you is induce a lot of drama you don't need because college is stressful in its own right. Plus it leaves you hanging emotionally and in wondering just when you are going to commit to seeking partners with a more focused outlook on relationships.
However, let me say this, too: you are too young to be tied down. You need to date around and explore life a lot more because if you don't do it now you will regret it later and become restless in whatever relationship you are in at that time. Remember that your brain won't stop developing until you are around age 25. So your sensibilities are still evolving and you aren't quite a mature human being yet, even at your age.
Once you graduate from college, go live overseas just to get yourself out of your comfort zone, learn more about how other people function and to help you become a more independent person. Thus, getting bogged down in a serious relationship at this point will only hold you back. Relax, take the long view and kick butt in school.
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Hey!!:) I'm a 15-year-old Chinese. My first boyfriend and I have been dating for a month now. He's really sweet in private but in public we HARDLY TALK!! We don't have much(almost none)to talk about! Someone says Silence is gold, is it really true?!
We're dating in private cause our parents don't approve, only a few friends know about it, is it why he sometimes kinda ignores me when he's with his friends? (link)
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First, you guys are still teenagers. That means that you are already having to deal with a lot of insecurities and the fact that you don't really have a firm grip on just who you are yet. And then having to play the denial game as far as your relationship goes only brings more stress into the equation.
"Silence is Golden" only has to do with the need for quiet reflection or a peaceful environment at times. Noise induces stress in people. It has nothing to do with people not talking to each other being some kind of virtue.
You also have to remember that men aren't raised to be as talky as girls. Men are more trained to endure hardship quietly and we don't really talk about our feelings to our male friends. Rather, we bond through doing stuff together instead of the reciprocal self disclosure women bond through. So there is a cultural disconnect between men and women arising from how they are raised.
In fact, a lot of guys are better talkers when the woman provokes them into reacting to what she is saying. So you might have to do the lion's share of the conversational work with this guy.
What I see ahead for you is more of the same unless you can get past the parental disapproval thing and free up some social space for you two. But then again, kids your age should be exploring life and dating around and not getting tied down as yet. Wait until you are in your mid-20's for that when you have more of a grasp on what you want out of life.
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Hello,
Thank you for stopping by,
My issue is that this guy and I have fallen for one another, we started off as friends and have slowly grown to develop deeper feelings. We spend all our time together. However we both live in England and he has a gf out in the States (USA) and he has just gone to visit her for a few weeks, I think they are both in agreement that they should part for the time being as the long distance thing is not working. I know he cares for me but he really cares for her too, and I'm not the kind of girl to break up a meaningful relationship, and its a very difficult thing to see someone that means so much to me leave to be with her for a while, and I know that a lot of people in this situation would either get bitter, jealous, resentful, maybe even email the guy constantly while he was away. I really hate all of those things and I want to stay positive in this negative time when my emotions are all over the place. Any quotes, stories or any words of wisdom to get me through these next few weeks would be must appreaciated. In the end I want what is best for him but its very difficult to be so cool and collected about the whole situation. Many Thanks, a. :)
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The main thing you have to do is sit down with him and ask definite questions such as:
1. Can you commit to me 100% emotionally?
2. Will your pangs of regret over the breakup with the American girl get in the way of us as a couple in any way?
3. Do you intend to go back to her at anytime in the future?
4. Where do you want to take our relationship?
And don't settle for evasions, half truths or cliches. If he can't give you firm, declarative answers to one or more of those questions then trouble is ahead.
You also have to realize that if he finds you attractive, other guys are going to as well. So it's not like you are going to be forced to put all your eggs in one basket. Therefore no need to feel that this guy is your only hope.
Just remember what you want out of life and ensure that this guy will help you attain it. If you don't think he can you need to go elsewhere.
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my extended family ignores me at family parties. i dont know what i did (link)
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You probably did nothing.
Every family has its own culture. It could be that you just don't fit in to their culture. It happens. I don't particularly associate with my cousins or uncles because we are just too different.
So please don't obsess on this. As long as you are getting the love you need from your immediate family you're doing well. Just accept it and move on.
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