Member Since: May 3, 2011
Answers: 1053
Last Update: December 12, 2012
Visitors: 30952
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i have a doctors appointment tomarrow and i wanna know if i give a urine sample, can the doctor tell if i had sex, and i did a couple days ago. please help me (link)
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Sex by itself doesn't cause large enough hormonal changes to be detected in a urine sample unless you're preggers. I've never heard of an STD being detectable in a urine sample, but maybe it's possible, I don't know.
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i just started junior high a couple months ago, and i made a quick friendship with these two girls that i really like. ok heres the story. one day, this popular 8th grader was being a bitch(as usual). i tried to ignore it, but my friend flipped her off and called her a bitch. now, all the 8th graders have been turned against her, and people write abunch of nasty stuff about her on formspring, and send her mean messages on facebook. the other day, the one that she flipped off confronted her on the hall, and i dont know what she said o her but she came out crying. i feel so bad for her, and i just want them to stop being so mean. she even said that she might transfer schools if they don't stop! I'm scared that if i confront the girl about it, she will turn on me next. i know that sounds kind of selfish, but im just too scared to. is there any way that i could talk to her without her being mean to me? (link)
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It's all fine and dandy to tell teachers or the principal about what is happening, but they likely won't do anything about it unless they directly see the behavior themselves.
The only things your friend can do is either beat the crap out of the popular girl (there could be blowback from that not just from fellow students, but the legal system, so that's a pretty precarious route to be sure. Unfortunately, it is also likely the most effective way to get her to slow her roll) or your friend could just say, "think of me what you want, but that doesn't mean she isn't a bitch." Don't back down and stop taking shit so personally. The opinions of a bunch of secondary school students are meaningless anyway. So stop lending them any credence.
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I've been with my boyfriend for 7 months, but we've known each other for 7 years. On and off. I really love him and all, but he is just too obsessed with playing his video games! When ever i try to talk to him, he doesn't pay attention to me. Just the game! When i suggest to do something together like go out somewhere he would just find an excuse not to go and he'd end up playing his game. I don't know what to do. He is a great boyfriend, but he's starting to play his game almost everyday and its extremely annoying. I've also tried to play with him at one point, but he's just so competitive and we argue over the game and its not healthy. I don't know what to do now :/ (link)
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You don't say how old you are, but the natural fact here is that he is too young psychologically for a real relationship. Therefore, it isn't worth your while to get all that emotionally invested in him, especially as there are probably 20 other guys in your school who would gladly give you more attention and want to do more stuff together. So break up with him. It will teach him a lesson in making choices and you will have an opportunity to find someone who will be more available to you emotionally.
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So I just got my report card back and I got two A's, but then I got two B's and a C+. The problem is with the B's and C was that I started a couple weeks late because I switched from another school and they had put me a grade ahead because there was some stuff I had already learned. I was really really upset and I spent about five hours crying. I just wanted to know if my grades count for anything. If they do I will go throw myself off a bridge (I'm twelve and a very distressed eighth grader). (link)
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Let me tell you my story:
I was a mediocre junior high student. I partied my way through high school and was one of those smart kids who teachers wondered why didn't have a higher GPA. Well, I didn't give a crap. It was just high school. I preferred to read on my own rather than do homework, for one, aside from all the drinking, womanizing, sports and pot use.
However, when I went to college, I graduated with honors because it was time to get serious. All that reading I did on my own really, really stood me in good stead for that. So the answer to your question is that middle school/junior high grades don't mean crap to anyone.
High school grades are only meaningful if you want to go to a top university straight out of high school. I went to community college before transferring to a four year school.
So the takeaway is, don't worry about your grades in junior high. Nobody cares. Just make sure you do at least well enough to pass with at least a C and then have something you are really interested in that counts on the side, learn everything you can about it and then move forward.
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Okay so i guess my question is how can i get my fuck buddy to actually admit her likes me more then a buddy? It all started about 6 months ago we met talked most of the night after me and my roomie were out at the bars.At the time he had had a girl friend and well i never asked we just talked. Then they broke up and and him and I would hook up quite often. Well about 2 weeks ago my roomie went outta town and i didnt wanna be in my conplex by myself as we had recently had a murder happen.My roomate and I had also asked him if he wanted to be a 3rd roomate and he said yes. Well its coming up on the last couple days of 2 weeks during that time he has introduced me to his friends saying things like " ya my girlfriend knows how to cook" but when i gatherd the courage to ask him about the whole girl friend thing i asked him " we arent dating right?" and he responded back no were not. But things he says to me here and there insuaiates gf/bf status but when i ask he says no. All i wanted was someone to stay with me to feel safe and hes only been here maybe 5 nights outta the 2 weeks. Im confused and dont know what to do. Any advice would be much apprecaited. (link)
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He likely wants you to be his girlfriend. However, he is waiting for some really obvious sign from you that you are interested in him that way because he doesn't want to really put himself out there and then suffer the ego killer of getting shot down.
So the ball is in your court. You can tell him you would like to be boyfriend-girlfriend with him if he is up for it. If he is evasive, you are going to have to decide if you want to continue seeing him as a sex friend. Whatever the case, you two definitely need to set in stone what your status is. Take the bull by the horns and dictate the situation rather than just sitting there trying to read his mind.
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Someone in another country is harassing me and calling me names.
I've blocked him on everything possible but he is still finding ways to contact me. Is there any legal actions I can take if he doesn't live in America?
Help please. (link)
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Obviously cyber stalking laws, and that is what this is, cyber stalking, are different in every country. You can email his country's justice ministry and file a complaint and you are going to have to provide concrete evidence such as copies of his emails, etc in order for them to have cause to initiate an investigation. Most likely, though, nothing will come of that.
The only other thing you can do is ignore him. You keep taking the bait and so that keeps the sport going for him. If he starts making threats, though, then that is quite a different thing. Save all of his emails, evidence of his tracking you, etc and then report him.
You might also get an antivirus program such as AVAST, which is free, and download it and then run a scan to see if he might have uploaded anything to your computer that allows him to track your usage such as a keylogger program.
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I feel like such a slut. I've never had sex with anybody and have only kissed anyone about two times. But, I have sent naked photos of myself to two much older men online who I believed love me at the time. The first was when I was 13. The second when I was 15. I am currently 16. Help? I feel terrible. (link)
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The guys were pedophiles. So here is some advice and I hope your will follow through with it:
If you still remember what screen name they were using on what service at the time turn them in. They are probably doing the same thing to other young girls. You can go to your local PD and they can help you with the reporting process and maybe even contact the service providers to get the addresses of the offenders. That way, you will have done the human community some good by taking those criminals off the street. Your silence will help nobody.
As far as loathing yourself for doing it, making mistakes are part of the human experience. All you can do is learn from them. When somebody asks you to do something, step back and ask yourself, "does this really seem like a good idea? Does this really do me any good?" It is your life and you only get to do it once, so take control of it and tell people who make untoward requests of you to piss off.
And remember, if your gut is telling you something is wrong when somebody gives you a line, then something is indeed wrong and you need to scram. ALWAYS LISTEN TO YOUR GUT!
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I have a teacher at school who has been very helpful and understanding since my freshman year. I am graduating at the end of the year, and would really like him to know what kind of affect he has had on me. Trouble is, I know a lot of students tell him at the end of the year how influential and great he has been with them--- and I want what I say to be memorable and stand out.
I planned on just going with what feels natural, and telling him after school one day after I've graduated how much I appreciate him and how he has been like a father-figure. Is that saying too much? I also planned on giving him a copy of my senior picture with a quote about teachers on the back.
THOUGHTS? Thanks so much. God bless! (link)
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I would leave out the father figure thing since that's kinda weird to some people even if you legitimately feel that way. But otherwise, just be honest and sincere and you're good to go.
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I'm feeling extremely miserable and empty, mainly due to the absence of someone in my life (they no longer go where I go), how to stop this and make myself feel better? (link)
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Being alone is a dandy opportunity to develop some independence. You don't have to be with the herd all the time to be a valid human being.
Take stock of your life. Half the people in this world get fed a constant s**t sandwich rammed right in their teeth from sun up until sundown. If this situation doesn't describe you then you are doing very well indeed. I lead a really ordinary life by American standards. But you know what? To that half of the world that is unceasingly put upon, my life is their idea of paradise. I'm really grateful for that. It's all about a sense of proportion.
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21 female. Ben -18
I've known Ben for about 8 years, but we haven't always been close. We recently started dating. He's not the type of guy I usually go for. I usually go for the college hockey boys -the ones all the girls want. But after the past 3, things clearly haven't been working out with those type of boys.
Now that I'm with Ben he treats me so unbelievably good. He would honestly do anything for me. I'm so comfortable with him, I've never been as comfortable with anyone else. My family likes him. I couldn't ask for a better boyfriend. But, I still keep thinking about wanting someone better. Yes, I'm crazy!! How could I find anyone better than Ben? I'm still wanting those hockey boys. I'm attracted to them, I find them sexy. Ben is cute and I'm a little bit attracted to him but it's not as strong as an attraction as hockey boys.
I tell Ben I have doubts because we're so different and he's not usually the type I go for. He gets really sad when I talk about it, because it would break his heart if we ever ended our relationship. He tells me to just give it a try, and that is what I will do but I am just so confused :(
I know I will not find a boy that treats me as good as Ben does. I keep telling myself that as the years go on, and I get older, the popular college hockey boys won't matter anymore because they will just be regular people too. They won't be the "stars" which is why I think I want them so bad. I have to remind myself that it's all about how a man treats me and if he treats me good and Ben does. My head is in a million different places. Ben is my first real boyfriend, all the other hockey boys I've just had "things" with, and they didn't last very long. Maybe I'm just not used to having a boyfriend. I'm a big flirt, so maybe I miss that!? I would never cheat on Ben though, I wouldn't do anything to hurt him. I don't why I keep doubting myself with Ben.
Please any guidance, advice, ANYTHING is appreciated!! (link)
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Your brain will continue to develop until about age 25-26. So you are still in the exploratory phase of your life and if you don't do that exploration, which will not only help you know what it is you REALLY want in a mate, but will expose you to all kinds of people that will help you gain life experience and a mature outlook on life, you will regret it. Both of you, especially him, are too young to get tied down. Explain all this to him and you can either have an open relationship where you are still boyfriend-girlfriend but are allowed to see other people, or you can break up and perhaps at a future date, if Ben is really what you want, you can always reunite.
And on the latter point, cheating on him will preclude the possibility of a future reunion because of the humiliation involved in being a guy and having your girlfriend screwing someone else. So better to resolve this like rational adults rather then try to sneak around.
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Ok i know giving blowjobs and every other type of sexual acts are bad but what about masterbation? You cant get an STD from it unless you touch someone else's private then yours right? Is it the only safe way to be satisfied and if so PLEASE add a link to your answer to websites that give techniques and stuff like that
Thank you to everyone who answers in advance.
oh and im 13/female :) (link)
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Masturbation is perfectly safe unless you begin bringing in foreign objects to supplement your fingers that aren't safe to use. Also, overuse of vibrators can cause an eventual inhibition of clitoral sensation. So keep the power tool use to a once in a while thing.
As far as technique, everybody is different. Different strokes for different folks, as they say. Just play with your clit and see what feels good. Also, your g spot is just inside your vagina on the upper wall and it feels like spongy ridges. Initially, when you stroke that area, you may feel a need to pee, but that will change into pleasurable sensations. You will not cause urination by stimulating your g spot. So relax and enjoy!
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Hello.
I'm considering removing my pubic hair to surprise my boyfriend. I was wondering if shaving or waxing was better. Also are there any tips i should know. I'm kind of nervous about waxing so if there are any tips on shaving they would be much appreciated. Thanks
xx :) (link)
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First, trim your pubic hair before your initial shave since this will make the shaving process easier. Use a pre-shave gel, lather it up real good after a hot shower, then while gong with the grain of your hair, use a fresh razor to mow it down.
I shave the old meat and two veg and I only have to shave about once every two weeks. So you won't have to shave that often and it isn't that much effort.
The benefit of waxing, from what I have heard, is that it is more long lasting and the hair grows back finer and not quite as spongy as normal pubic hair is. But it will hurt.
Btw, while I prefer that my gf be shaved, a nicely trimmed pubic area is perfectly cute, too. I just like being able to clearly see the beautiful thing that is the vulva and not get hair in my mouth while I am eating her.
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what if your not ready for sex but your partner is giveing you signs do you have sex to keep them or not?
IM 13 SOMEONE!!!!!!!
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If you're not ready you're not ready. Plus you have to realize that if this one guy wanted to be your boyfriend there will be a minimum of ten more who will gladly line up to replace him if he leaves you. Also, when you guys do get it on, he will brag about it to his buddies because guys have a need to put points on the board and show what studs they are. Sounds inane, but it's true.
So you hold all the cards here. Tell him you're not ready and won't be for at least 3-4 years and if he can't accept it, well, you have to do what is right for you because if the shit hits the fan he will head for the hills and leave you holding the bag/baby/STD. You only get one shot in life. Take control of it, do what is right for you and do it right.
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For the past month or so my boyfriend and i have been messing around and getting closer and closer to actual sex. about two weeks ago things got heightened and i was in only a thong while he had on boxers and basketball shorts. we imitated sex and the tip of his penis was in my vagina. my period is 5 days late. what are the chances im pregnant? (link)
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When a man gets sexually aroused, he begins to secrete a substance called pre-cum, which contains sperm. This is different from the cum he will spurt when he orgasms (well, at least to way oversimplify things here). So if he had even just the head or tip of his penis in your vagina he could have dropped off some pre-cum and thus impregnated you.
I hope you aren't preggers. Let it be a warning that you will heed either by using condoms next time, even for incidental contact like that which you described, or get on the pill. Good luck whatever the case may be.
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hey guys ...i am 19yrs old girl.i am worried about my future.my cousin brother forced me to have sex when i was 8-9years old.if i dnt do so he use to beat me.he have sex with me 2-3 times but i didnt bleed.he use to lick n play with my pussy until i get menstruation(on 11).now i am worried if my bf got to know m not virgin..i dnt want him to knw since that was not my fault..help me out.do u think my bf will knw??
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First, you don't even have to be honest about the virginity thing. Just lie if it would make you feel better. This is a white lie, one that doesn't hurt anyone.
Secondly, men who are obsessed with the virginity issue are wackjobs. A woman's prior sexual history is nobody's business but her own unless it would somehow affect your relationship with your current bf. My attitude is I don't care if a woman has slept with the entire seventh fleet, if she will be faithful and honest, isn't bringing in any STD's and is loving then I'm good.
If your man asks about you being a virgin and seems really intent on needing to be with a virgin, that is a sign of mental illness and/or a potential abuser and you need to dump him. It's your body, not his. You do what is right for you and the hell with what anyone else thinks.
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Okay so I talk to this guy a lot and we always want to hook up with each other. Most of the time he will text me asking to have sex and we will talk dirty. I love it and sometimes I'll text him saying how badly I want sex and I want to suck his...anyway but when good time comes I always get nervous and make an excuse saying I can't.I later wish I wasnt such chicken. How can I stop getting so nervous and finally just do it?! (link)
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There are a number of ways to look at this:
1. You didn't say if you were a virgin or not, but you may be afraid of your lack of real sexual experience and looking foolish. You don't need to do that. Tell the other person you're a virgin and hopefully he will proceed accordingly. There is no shame in being inexperienced, especially when you are a girl.
2. You aren't ready for sex with the guy or something inside you is telling you that there isn't something quite right about this situation. Now I believe in the adage that if your gut is telling you something isn't kosher it ain't kosher and it is better to extricate yourself from the situation.
3. You just aren't into sex at this time. You want the guy to like you and so you play up to his need for sex by giving him some innuendo. This is unfair to him and yourself. Be honest with yourself. Do you REALLY want sex right now or do you have some legitimate fear (pregnancy, disease, he will pull a pump and dump on you) that is causing you to balk at going through with it? He is not going to be the only guy who will want to get with you. So you don't need to treat him as if he is the only game in town. Your body is your own and your life is your own. Decide what you want and stand by it and don't let others sabotage you.
Anyway, the default safe response is to text the guy and just say you were sorry for leading him on, but you have a lot of conflicted feelings right now and so you want to step back until you get them sorted out. If he doesn't understand he is a tool anyway.
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Its extremely embarassing asking advice about this but I have no else to talk to about it. About a year or so ago I was with a friend and she was with this guy she wanted to go hang with him in his van so I went with her because I didn't want her to go alone. They started getting high and asked me if I wanted to. Stupidly enough I agreed and apparently I slept with the guy that was there. I felt so disgusting I don't even know why I chose to get high. I'm tottally clean and I don't do stuff like that. I feel like a skank. I didn't want to do that and I found the guy really repulsive I told him I didn't wana be involved with him in any way and that I shouldn't have done that my friend doesn't look at me any differently but I do. I'm so ashamed of myself and I regret it deeply. I just want to forget all about it but I can't idk what to do. (link)
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Kiddo, as you proceed through life you are going to make mistakes that you will regret. It happens. It's part of growing up. We are all imperfect and we all have moments of weakness. The only thing you can do is learn from those mistakes to become a better person.
In this instance, here is how you should look at this:
1. You will never, ever allow anyone to tell you what you should do because you should always do what is right for you personally. Nobody else can be you and only you know what will make you happy. Next time you are presented with a similar situation, say, "sorry you guys, this ain't for me. See ya later!" When you walk away from potentially troublesome situations it is hard for you to get ensnared in it.
2. Relax. You shouldn't hate yourself over this. Try to keep things simple and don't overthink. Just say to yourself, "wow, I blew it there. Not gonna do THAT again!" and move on.
3. Sometimes you have friends, for whatever reason, that are losers. Be honest with yourself. Is your friend a loser? It looks like it to me. And you know what losers just love? Dragging others into the pit of hell with them. This is why you avoid or jettison losers in/from your social circle. Don't be so desperate for friends that you choose losers to hang out with because it will cost you.
4. Take control of your life. Don't let others sabotage it. Only you can live it and you only get to do it ONE TIME. Make that one time count for something positive rather than getting dragged into the pathetic daytime talk show like circus too many others allow themselves to get sucked into.
5. Just to repeat: DON'T OVERTHINK!
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I'm 15 in 10th grade (high school)and I go to a small private school where everybody knows everyone and i recently broke up with my bf and on facebook his status went from being in a relationship to single, but now some people who are his friends are commenting on it and they are calling my a slut and more horrible stuff. Is this cyber bullying? What can I do? I've been crying for a long time and I've always been bullied (verbally) by people for as long as I can remember. I told my parents and they said to do something to take my mind off of it..but I cant! I want to switch schools to a bigger school. I feel like people are just ignoring me when I tell them im bullied, I only have 1 friend really and I don't have many classes with her. I'm really tired of this and I'm starting to hate my life...Please help!! please!!!:( (link)
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Women tend to take the criticisms of others to heart whether those criticisms have any actual merit or not. The irony about women is that often times their worst bully is themselves that way they are always critiquing their looks in minute detail.
Anyway, realize that once you get out of high school and move on to college that the bullying bullshit stops. Unfortunately, adolescents are a very insecure lot and some deal with their own self loathing by lashing out at other people. This is especially true among boys because boys are dominance oriented and usually don't deal very well with situations in which they are on the losing side of a particular circumstance.
So my advice to you is to consider that the bullies are just a bunch of miserable, self hating fucks and the problem is them, not you. As long as you are a thoughtful, well meaning and hard working person you have no reason to be down on yourself. You know the truth about yourself and what some given set of others project on you is pure fantasy and delusion and therefore shouldn't be lent any credence.
Don't let others sabotage you or they will have won. Carry out your own agenda because only you can live your life and what others have to say about it should be treated as immaterial because they aren't you.
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Is it ok for an 11 year old girl to masturbate??? (link)
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Perfectly normal and don't ever let anyone tell you different. Enjoy!
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I'm 21.
Last night me and my boyfriend spent the night together. I've never given a guy a BJ before. I had my period so we couldn't do much, so I was giving him a HJ and decided to try giving him a BJ because I'm so comfortable with him and it felt right.
At first I thought it was going to be disgusting, but it wasn't to me at all. I was fine with it. The only thing is- I GOT BORED! I was doing it, and doing it, and I was like okay this is boring ..not to mention I was getting tired!
Is this normal? I know he was enjoying it by what he was saying, but I don't know how I can keep doing it without being so bored haha. (link)
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The only thing you can really do is eroticize in your mind his reactions. Believe me, when you are doing this for him he thinks it is really, really hot! It's like when I eat pussy the most erotic thing about it are the musical assemblage of her sighs, moans and orgasms, nevernmind the fact that vaginas are beautiful.
If you really love him and aren't just doing it out of some sense of obligation, you should enjoy getting him off. Keep your hand and jaw limp to stave off fatigue and have at it!
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