Giving advice is what i do best and it comes naturally. If not, by experiences. I will do my best to help you with any questions you have. You can ask me anything from RELATIONAL, PERSONAL CONFLICTS, OFFICE POLITICS to any other things that comes into mind.
Here to help....
Age: 23
Member Since: April 16, 2006
Answers: 59
Last Update: April 29, 2006
Visitors: 3866
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Sir/Madam
I am a young IT professional(Master in Computer Application)in India and working in a company as a project trainee.I am just 6 months old in my job.Though being in IT(Information Technolody), I am equally interested in a career in Human Resources(HR).Though i am aware that IT and HR are two different fields, but i would still like to ask, if there is any way i can switch from IT to HR,and if i can use my qualification in IT as to augment my HR career.
Waiting for a reply.
Regards
Soumava
(link)
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Basically, your interviewer tend to look at your qualifications and place you were your expertise lies.
You'll need the experiences to show that you can manage people. Stick to your IT profession. Get involved in leading a team. And the results from leading them will help you in getting a job in the HR department.
Get to know people who are from the HR "world". Get them as your reference however, you'll need to weave your way through by proving yourself that you are capable to handle HR.
Unless someone offers you a HR job... Keep trying and don't give up. I am sure you will get to where you want to go in your career.
Good luck!!
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What are your schedules like on weekdays and weekends? I do nothing and feel like I'm wasting my time. I'm a sophomore now and there are no programs here to learn how to play soccer or any sports from scratch and I don't want to waste my friends' time. I can't go to camp in the summer because I am volunteering either. I don't like instruments so much. People have already been playing for years. I feel helpless and at a loss for what topics to talk about with people because I don't like anything, sort of. I also have a bad memory. I heard that sports and instruments do much for your overall well-being; you're well rounded and your memory and mood improve. I am stuck and at the bottom and have been for years. I have wasted sixteen years now. I don't remember a lot of what I've learned before and mess up punch lines in jokes. Nothing interesting happens to me either and if something does I suck at retelling a story. The details get muddled up in my mind. Well, it's just that everything takes so much effort and it's not too late to learn now but how? (link)
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I am not really sure what your problem is.
Everything you do takes effort, even waking up in the morning everyday takes effort. Its a matter if how badly you want to do something.
Everyone possess different qualities. Take me for example, i am a very active person. I do a lot of sports and workout a lot. But i can't workout all the time. In my free time, i come to this site to help people with their problems. Since giving advice comes naturally to me, i thought, why not use it to help people who need them.
Find something that you are really good at and work on it. And since you are really good at it already, you wouldn't have to put much effort in starting something new.
If you enjoy the outdoors, try hiking and photography at the same time. It keeps you fit and photography is very subjective. It can help you express yourself and no memory require :p. You don't need to buy an expensive camera. Just experiment with all sorts of angles and motives.
Enjoy and i hope this helps
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It seems silly to start off with, "I have this friend who..." but unfortunately that is the case. I , in fact, HAVE a friend who is severly overparented. Her mother has always been a beast of burden, constantly calling, worrying, ranting about how she's being rude or distant or gaining weight (she's 5'9 and 110 lbs btw). The constant nagging never ends. The biggest problem is that she's 20 years old now and it hasn't stopped. She had to come back from college because of an illness and now has to stay with her family until her treatment is over. She has a 10:00pm curfew because her mother refuses to go to bed until she's home. She calls every hour to make sure she takes her pills and asks where she is and what she's doing and whom she's with. My friend has, of course, addressed the issue, but her mother is so consumed by denial that when her daughter says, "You hurt my feelings" she simply gives a condescending laugh and replies, "No I don't." It's really that bad. All the research i've done on over-parenting seems to focus on a child's first years. She is almost 21! She has a younger sister who gets the same treatment. And unfortunately this constant smothering has left her with very little confidence to break away or stand up to herself. If anyone has any personal experience (on either side of the issue), comments, or advice, it's much appreciated. On yes, and her mother says she's simply too busy for family therapy. (link)
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First, do some background check. There could be reason which only her mom knows or it is within the family that others do not know about.
I am sure as a mother, she just wants to protect her children.
Communication!!
Talking it out is one of the best solutions. And i don't mean just by saying, "you hurt my feelings." The daughter has to learn to be a little bit more ASSERTIVE and AGGRESSIVE when making a point to the mother. BUT NOT to the extend of screaming and shouting resulting in a fight.
Her mom sounds like the character "BREE" in Desperate Housewives.
But i can see where the mother is coming from, she is just concerned about her daugther's condition. Perhaps, in the past, she had a traumatic experience of losing someone dear as a result of bad health conditions. She could be blaming herself for not doing anything then and ratifying the mistake through her daughter. Very natural thing to do. Plus, she IS a mother. Maternal instincts rule.
What about her younger sister? The younger one may be getting the same kind of treatment as a sign of equality and fairness. Perhaps the mom is just trying to make the older daughter feel less tied down. "I treat all you siblings the same way. There is no room for you to say that i am unfair and controlling you"
No offence, but all parents have a certain kind of mentality in dealing with their children.
Get the daughters to talk to their mom and ensure that both sides are heard. Listening and understanding is the key to communication.
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i sometimes ( like when i lay down for a while ) have a sharp pain right above my navel. what is this?? is it part of the sytoms of starting a period. I doubt it. but i really hope not!! THanks! (link)
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How long have you had this paint? It could be anything... I strongly suggest you get it checked.
And don't be too worried to be having your period. Its a step to womanhood.
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if a guy older than you who you like is pressuring you to have sex or oral sex and you are not going out and are only friends is he only in it for sex? btw im 13 hes 16 (link)
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Simple, just say, "NO!!"
It is obvious he is just using you. He is probably taking advantage of the fact that you like him and he knows it.
And even if you guys were going out. There should be no pressure to these kind of matters. It comes with consent and mutual respect.
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My life has been sucking. I was rapped, my boyfriends have been treating me like dirt, i had to get a job (14/f) because my crackhead (litteraly.) parents are too stupid (litteraly, neither went to college=hard way to find jobs) to get jobs and my dad is an alcoholic who beats me over little things such as my weight (a lil chubby), my grades (as and bs)and having friends and going out. so i decided to do drugs. my friend nick and i decided to go get the ingredients from the CVS down the street. then we did it. and we cant stop, i mean i dont remember a think while im high and i love it but one time i slept at nicks house because i was too high to remember where and what was happening and i woke up and tried waking nick up and he wouldnt wake up, eventually he did but it was a real scare! i went from doing it so much in one week to..only a lot in a month (there was some of a difference) and im just not sure what to do..my family hates me and treats me like an outcast and i hate it..i wanna runaway..but i REALLY wanna stop all the bad things im doing, im going to parties, having sex and drinking/doing drugs. i wanna stop..but im already so into it i cant stop..PLEASE HELP ME!!NO ONE ELSE WILL!! (link)
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What you need is professional help. Get help from the social department. It is GREAT that you want to change your life and make it a better one. And my dear, there are a lot of people out there who cares. They WILL help you.
It is not going to be easy to start all over again. First talk it out with the social worker. They will come up with a lot of solutions.
Talking to your parents about how you feel and why you did what you did in the past helps. If they just won't listen to you, get the social worker to talk to them.
Maybe both you and Nick would want to help each other out of this "mess". If he feels and thinks the same way, the both of you can change your lifes together. If not, chances are, he is a bad influence to you. You can still befriend him, no problem with that. BUT provided you DO NOT indulge in "activities" like you did before. You are only 14! There's a whole lot of life in front of you. One friend less for a better life with a loving family.
And as for your parents, they didn't choose to be not educated. And i think it is wrong for you to call them "stupid". THEY ARE YOUR PARENTS. They might have told you before, "It is attitudes like yours that got you into trouble in the first place." REMEMBER... THEY ARE YOUR PARENTS!! We cannot choose who our parents are going to be or what they may be. As children to our parents, we need to learn to understand them. Consider what they may be thinking. And parents DO NOT hate their children.
Anger and frustration is the cause of resentment. Your parents are most probably angry at themselves and not you. If they really didn't care about you, i don't think they would even spend the time monitoring your studies and noticing that you are not doing well. Age is not really the matter, but do you think you deserve this kind of freedom (going out and indulging in "activities")??
Talk things out with your parents. I had very protective parents too when i was about your age. I resented them for keeping me "locked up" but as i grew up i learn to understand and listen to their reasoning.
No matter how stubborn parents may be, you will STILL be their daughter! No matter how much wrong you've done, you are STILL their daughter.
I don't want to sound like i'm preaching but,
"Children are gifts from GOD, care for them, nurture them and see them grow"
"Parents are gifts from GOD, love them, respect them, care for them and thank them for everything no matter how big/ small"
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I had been with mah ex for about 7 months. Yeah, i know it doesn't seem like alot but it was long distance because he moved like across the freaking U.S.A. Well, he broke up with me because he SAID he met some other girl at tha mall. My friend told me he was going out with my other friend who didn't leave near him either. I was so pissed of that it had to be my good friend. Anyway, the only way i keep in touch with him is over the internet or sometimes phone. Before he broke up with me, we lost weren't in touch with each other because my internet broke && i forgot his number... i don`t know why he didn`t call me.. My point ;; i miss him so much && i can't get over him. I cry over him all the time && he never talks to me anymore.. last thing he said to me was i love u. wtf.. what do you think i should do? Should i tell him how i feel, bitch at him, or never talk to him again?... =[ please help. (link)
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Well, he was going out with you for 7 months, met a girl at the mall and broke up with you. Ahem... Pardon me but WTF??!!
I know how you feel. Been there, done that. My ex left me for my best friend. Very pissing off and i was very angry. And you have all the right to be angry.
But i believe everything happens for a reason. No matter how good or bad a relationship turns out, both party is responsible. Don't know if you'll agree, but i believe in looking for the cause. And i don't mean the fact that he found another girl.
Yes, i still like the guy a lot and after being angry for some time, i started thinking if it was really all his fault that our relationship ended. I figured it was only fair to see it rationally.
Yes, it is easy to see it as he ended the relationship when he met a girl at the mall. But look at it this way, it might be the easiest way for him to tell you and let go of the relationship. Or he could be just a jerk to play you out like that. You'll have to find out. Talk to him once you've gotten over the break up.
As for yourself, look back and rationally see what happened during the relationship. Sometimes we make mistakes without knowing them. And it is definitely not the guys fault if he didn't tell you what was wrong. Most guys just don't want to hurt you by saying, "Hey, you did something wrong. I don't like it."
Get an objective view of everything. It'll be easier to get over things when you know what really happened.
I think the both of you still love each other. Sometimes it is better off for two people to be the best of friends and not a couple.
In the end, if all turns out well, you'll both gain a friendship and probably make it stronger because you've understood each other more. Try to forgive and not resent.
I am sure you are still young. Whatever the reasons that ended this relationship, take it as a stepping stone and learn from this experience.
I know this might be too much to absorb or too complicated to think about. Just take it one step at a time. There IS no easy way to a relationship problem.
Good luck!
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There is a guy who likes me as more then friend and i told him i liked him to but now im not so sure. What should i do? (link)
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Your statement is quite contradictory. You said you like him but you're not sure now.
Ask yourself what is making you feel that way.
1. Maybe you like the guy but not in a relationship kind of way.
2. You like the guy but am not ready for a relationship.
3. You are reevaluating whether you really like that guy.
For whatever the reason, be sure of it. How can you be sure? Follow your heart. What is your heart is not telling you anything? You will just have to use the alternative called the brain. Rationality is sometimes better than following your emotions.
Remember, take your time and there is no easy way out of relationship matters.
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ok my bf wants me to give him a blow job but i never have before and i dont want to look like and idoit or something...the idea doesnt really bother me just the fact of my practice does. what should i do? (link)
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Be frank with your boyfriend. Let him know that you are ready to do it. Let him guide you. It is after all a better way to please a guy. He knows his body better than anyone else. From there, try to remember what makes him tick and the next time you do it, push the right buttons. Frankly, every guy is different, be slightly experimental and try new things.
If you are still in doubt, there are a lot of information about this on the web. Look it up. It may give you some pointers.
Enjoy....
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ok i like this guy who is 16 im 13. hes sorta a "bad boy" but still like really respect full and sweet. when me and him are alone we are like all over each other and flirting a lot but when hes around his friends he will still flirt with me but not as much... i dont know if that means he will always be different around his friends or what. he doesnt like me being younger than him at all. he always says i should have be born earlier and stuf like that but he has never really said he likes me or anything he tells his friends he thinks im "fine" or whatever but wont say anything like that to me.i dont know if i should tell him i like him evan though i know that he knows that because i told his friend i did and talk to him and see if he likes me or just stay this friends with benifits or what ever we are? PLEASE HELP SOON!!! (link)
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Hmm... a typical relationship problem. Remember, you are still young.
Quite apparent, there is an age gap between the two of you. Look at it this way, in a year or two, he might not even be around. He would be going off to college and you will still be in highschool.
Frankly, anything can happen to him during this transition. He is maturing and this is when he will start choosing his path in life. People at that age have different requirements.
You might want to think if you are going to be matured enough to be in a relationship with an older person who is in a different "world".
On the bright side, he could change into a real gentleman after stepping into society and you guys would be fitting for each other.
If you are really in a hurry to know what he thinks and where this is going to end, sit him down and talk to him.
If not, i suggest you keep in contact with him and wait patiently till the time is right. How would you if the time is right? You will know when the time comes.
Look, whatever happens, you will either gain a boyfriend or gain a "big brother".
"Trust yourself, follow your heart"
Good luck!!!
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how long can sperm stay fertile afer ejaculation (link)
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Are you refering to after ejaculation in/outside the body?
Normally sperm can stay fertile 72 hours after ejaculation. The duration may differ either longer or shorter depending on the condition of the vagina.
If there is a perscence of spermicide or the pH in the vagina is high, the sperm may die in a matter of minutes.
If you are still unsure, try checking it up on a medical journal or website. Hope this helps.....
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I have an audiovox 8910 cell phone from verizon. It has a cracked LCD screen so verizon won't replace it. It got smashed a few days ago, and now it won't take or place calls, and neither my main screen or lcd screen works, at all. I was wondering if anyone knew of a way to fix this. I've taken the phone apart, and it took and recieved a few calls then quit working again. If you have any sites that can guide me through a step by step process to try and fix it or have any suggestions, please let me know.
Thanks! (link)
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Sounds like your phone is "dead". I can understand why Verizon won't replace it. They would probably fix it for you for a price. However, it might cost a portion of your original purchase price or maybe more. Therefore it is not worth the trouble. I suggest you get a new phone.
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How can you still love another person if your goin out with another??
WHAT IS LOVE????
HELP ME:p
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There is no definition to love.
Coming from a young adult, choosing to be in a relationship is not so much a matter of love. It is more of a choice.
I am not sure how old you are now but i can safely tell you that there is more to a relationship other than love.
Yes, love is the first thing everyone would think of when they choose to be with someone. But welcome to reality. There are a lot of weighing to be done if you want to go through life. Like i said, it is full of choices.
You have to work things out with yourself and know what you want in life, who you want to spend it with and how you would want to spend with the person you chose.
Some people choose to base a relationship all on love. As long as they love each other, they are willing to sacrifice every other thing (wealth, career,etc)
You can love 10 people but still choose the one you love less as opposed to the one you love most because you can see a future together. Meaning, he/she might be able to provide for you and you can lead the life you chose together.
Like i said, its a matter of choice. Love indeed is a very important and powerful thing. It is what holds the relationship together.
However, in the end, it is how you want your relationship to be. Be it based on love, communication,support, respect, etc.
You have to answer all these questions yourself and there is no right or wrong answer. "It's a matter of choice"
Don't be too confused over this matter. In time you will learn and discover what you really want.
Good luck!
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What are some exercises to build muscle and get rid of fat in your high thighs, and the fat where your bra strap is near your arm pit? lol thanks!!I rate 5's!! (link)
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There are a lot of exercises to work on the thighs. I am not sure if you are looking at building massive muscles or just lean and toner thighs.
Get into some cardio exercise to lose weight, fat and tone up your body. Jogging or running is recommended since you are targeting your thigh muscles.
If you can, do "leg abductions" and "leg adductions". These 2 exercises work the outer and inner thigh.
If you really want to build up muscles, do what the guys normally do, squats with weights (get help for this)
As for the other problem, i heard doing a "forward grip pull down" helps. There may be other more effective ways to do it. I'll get back to you when i find out.
Remember, exercise and results are subjective, know your body and don't give up.
Have fun working out!
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I saw one of your answers and you said for the chick to get up a little earlier to run for 30 minutes. Idk but that'd be really tough to 'run' 30 minutes, and i'm in track! Do you mean like they could walk 30 minuets? I don't want people to think, oh gosh we have to go run 30 minutes to get fit!
Idk i guess i'm ocnfused a bit. (link)
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Thank you for your question. And sorry for the confusion.
However far you can go with your workout depends on the individual.
I quote:
"Idk but that'd be really tough to 'run' 30 minutes, and i'm in track!"
I am not suprised with your statement. Most of my track team mates are not able to outrun (in terms of distance & time) a person who is not in the team. "There is a difference between running and sprint-ing"
Reason, there is a specific way to train and run on the track. You wouldn't normally see people run the way you guys do on track.
To answer your question, it all depends on what fitness level you are in. For starters, you can run 1 hour and still won't be fit. There is a technique to fitting your cardio workout to your body.
Start slow, monitor your results and once you've found a comfortable pace and distance, maintain it. Stick to that routine till your body is more adapted to the routine. Then, move on to another level.
How to exercise and achieve the desired results is very subjective. Some people lose more weight doing a 15minutes 5 times a week routine. Others doig a 30 minutes 3 times a week routine.
Like i said, it depends on your body.
Good Luck
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I’ve been having issues with my parents lately. I have a different problem for each of them. I guess this is a two-part question.
In order to fully understand my situation, I think a little background information is required . . .
My parents met one another while they were in highschool. They started dating soon after and eventually my mother ended up pregnant with me at the age of seventeen. It was completely unexpected and unplanned - I was a ‘surprise’, if you will. At the time, my grandmother was a very traditional woman. The idea of premarital children just didn’t sit well with her. She managed to convince my parents that marriage was their only option. They married three months after I was born.
Because my father came from a wealthier family, he graduated from highschool and was able to attend university. My mother, on the other hand, dropped out of highschool four months before her graduation so she could get a full-time job in order to support me and father while he was in school.
It’s not really a surprise that my parents are divorced now, they have been since I was five. But that’s not the issue. I live with my mother and stepfather now and she often talks about how she wishes she hadn’t been so careless when she was younger. She’s always warning me not to ‘throw away’ my youth like she did.
I know she doesn’t mean it, but sometimes I feel as though she resents me. I can’t help but think about how much better her life could have been had she not had me at such a young age. I know this is all in the past, and what’s happened cannot be changed but I would just like to know how I can get past this feeling of “I ruined my mother’s life”. I'd like to be able to stop feeling like a mistake.
Any and all advice is welcome =]
And that’s just my mother. . .
Now for part two - my father.
Like I mentioned before, my parents got married and then divorced at a fairly young age. I live with my mother so I only see my father once a month, if that. I wouldn’t exactly say we’re close . . .
Anyways, a few days ago, my mother told me a story about my father that really disturbed me. She told me that three days before their wedding, at his bachelor party, my dad had cheated on her. And even though she knew about it, she still married him. I was completely shocked when I heard this. I can’t help but be angry at my father. He doesn’t know that I know about this yet, but I would really like to confront him about it. I’ve talked to my mom about it and she doesn’t want me to say anything to him. She suggested that I just let it go. However I know that I won’t be able to do that. To me, this isn’t something I can just forget about. I would like some sort explanation from my father, even though I know he wont have one for me.
I’m supposed to have dinner at his house Monday night and I plan on confronting him then. My only problem is that I don’t know how I should go about this.
Any suggestions or any advice whatsoever would be greatly appreciated =]
Sorry this is so long =/ (link)
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Whether your mother is resenting you or not. Whether your dad cheated on your mom and she still married him. Yes, it's all in the past. And you can't be held responsible for it. Those things happened as a result of their actions and choices that they made.
You on the other hand, shouldn't feel the way you feel now. Instead, why not learn from their mistakes and make sure you live a better life and make the right choices in YOUR LIFE.
I am sure if you concentrate on what you have planned for yourself, not only will you get the satisfaction of achieving something, your parents will be happy to see you succeed and put their past and look into YOUR PRESENT & FUTURE.
"Life is full of ups and down, we choose how we go through it"
"Nothing in life is easy, just take it one step at a time"
Good luck
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im currently at about 140. if i do 200 jumping jacks and 100 sit ups every night, what's a resonable amount of weight i can lose in about a month, maybe two? plus im drinking a lot of water all during the day. any tips?
thanks, 5's for all. (link)
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Honestly, i've never heard of losing weight doing jumping jacks....
Here's a suggestion, instead of doing JJs at night, wake up a lil early in the morning and go for a run. 30 minutes at least 3-4 times a week. It'll do you a whole lot of good. And try tightening your ab muscles when doing sit ups. That way, you are actually working all your ab muscles.
Drinking water is a good thing. However, overdrinking can cause water retention. You wouldn't want to get bloated just because you drank water, do you?
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Alright, so I'm meeting my ex in exactly 2 months, and I NEED to look perfect. Right now I'm gonna focus on my weight, so I need to know; If I take a 30 minute walk every day for exactly 60 days, will that be enough to make me REALLY SKINNY. I'm not fat at the moment, like most people would call me skinny. But I've got some loose fat. Like I don't really care at all what my weight is, as long as I look skinny. So would 30 minutes a day WALKING (i hate running) be enough? Ive tried doing 60 situps/day for 3 months now and it hasnt done anything for me! So if walking and situps dont work I dont know what to do :S like I know making yourself throw up is bad, and wont work for long, but I dont need it to work for long, I just need to be skinny that one week I see him, so without being all "its bad for you..bla bla bla" like a doctor, be COMPLETELY HONEST please - would it make me skinny, even for just one week? And if so when should I start, how many weeks before I see him? Or will it just make sure I dont GAIN weight? Just dont care for my health, be honest -- would it make me look skinny for a week?
Thank you! (link)
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Why would you want to lose more weight if you are already, as you say "skinny"?
Your ex might think you are deprieved or something after you guys ended things.
All you have to do now is eat right, do a bit of cardiovascular workout... Brisk walking since you hate running.
And be confident. If you really want to let him see how skinny you can be by all means stick that finger down your throat.
But if you are trying to show him how well you are doing and going on with life and enjoying it, all you have to do is ENJOY, RELAX & BE CONFIDENT!!!!
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Besides crunches .. what are some good Ab workouts? Crunches dont seem to show any results (link)
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Try holding in your stomach muscles when doing crunches.
It is a more effective way to get those ab muscles working.
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Alright guys, i'm in track, 8th grade female. I think i have shin splints and i think i like tore something in my ankle.
First off my shins are bruised and they bruise when i run, and they hurt! like when i shave, i go up & down with soap on my shin, but it hurts to bad to do it anymore.
Second I twisted my ankle a month or more ago. When i hold my foot and let at a 90 degree angle, and stretch my foot out to an obtuse angle, it HURTS SO BAD! today during track, well, i almost died.
Should i go to a doctor?
any advice? (link)
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My dear girl,
You have serious injury problems. You SHOULD seek medical advice. And since you are in track, you should know that you shouldn't exert your injuries.
Get a doctor to look at the injuries.
Get well soon and take better care of your injuries...
Good luck in track!!!
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