missbananafontana's advice column

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Q: I've always shaved my bikini area and I hate doing it. I was thinking of starting to wax. I just have one question, can I have them wax ALL the hair off so there is none at all, or is there a limit to what they will do?

A Brazilian bikini wax will remove all the hair in the bikini area, compared to a regular bikini wax which will remove the "Bermuda Triangle" area of the top and sides are removed, but there is still hair in the main area, including the labia. I suggest a "half-Brazilian wax" where all the hair except the hair on the labia is removed, because the labia has no muscle, so if you do get it waxed, it's going to hurt like Hell.

Q: Alright so i just got a new laptop and i obviously want music on it. Is there any way to get my music from my desktop computer to my laptop but keeping like all my playlists, the ratings for the songs, song plays and everything? Please help! Thanks!

http://docs.info.apple.com/article.html?artnum=300173

That will also most likely include your ratings and everything.

Have a nice day.

Q: I'm really sorry if it's the wrong category!
15/f
Anyway, I live in Belgium, and I have friends from Italy, France, Spain and Portugal.
I also visit France a lot, and make new friends there.
In my school when you see your friends you do the air kiss cheek thing to their right cheek.
(if that makes sense)
But I'm wondering what you're supposed to do in France, Italy, Spain and Portugal.
Also I was on a skiing holiday last week in France, and I went to ski school. The last time I saw my teacher-the night before I left he put his cheek forward when we said bye and I did the cheek thing-but on the left side.
Was that right...or wrong...?
I mean I'm probably going back to the place next year and I will see him again- so I don't want to make a mistake next time.

Sorry it was long...but this is all quite important to me.

Thanks!

France- Kissing on the cheek (or air-kissing) is the traditional way to greet one another. It is appropriate to give two, three or four kisses depending on where you are. If you are unsure, go for two. The local etiquette can vary from common cultural context.

Spain and Italy- The common rule of thumb is two kisses, starting with the right cheek.

I am unsure of the rules in Portugal, but I would assume the same rule as Spain. If you really feel in doubt, shake hands.

If you are ever in the Netherlands or Poland, three kisses are expected.

Q: 16/f

I lost my virginity when I was about.. 14 and a halfish.
I've had sex a bunch of times.. but tonight, I bled a bit again. Is that normal?

Wow. Unless you live in South Carolina, you broke a law, which could've landed whoever you were having sex with in court. Besides South Carolina (where the age is 14/f and 16/m) the minimum age is 16, which even I think is too young.

Back to the question. If you have lost your virginity recently, recurring bleeding may happen. But sometime when you have sex and you bleed, it is serious. You could have a tumor on your ovaries, or cervicitus, in which case I would advise you go to a doctor/gynecologist preferably.

EDIT:
Uh, yeah you did. If both of you had sex when you were 14 and did not live in South Carolina, then you broke the law. There is no way around it. 'Kay? And as you can read in my column, I am always right, so when I say that that was way too young, then it was.

Have a nice day.

Q: Ive been methodist for much of my life, and im a baptized episcopalian, but i dont really believe in some of their beliefs. Its not that i dont love and respect God, its just that i want to see him in a somewhat different light. Thats why my core beliefs are of Deist descent, (think Benjamin Franklin, George Washington, Thomas Paine), since it makes sense to me. I was wondering if anyone knew anything about it or was willing to talk about it with me.

Knew anything about what? Deism or Episcopalian? Or both? Both are religious, and I don't like to talk religion since it makes me kind of nauseous when I think about it. (Seriously, I get a sort of motion sickness without moving if that makes sense.) Hoawever, Wikipedia is very informative and will hopefully tell you all you want to know about anything.
Deism- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deism
Episcopalian- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Episcopal_Church_in_the_United_States_of_America (go to the disambiguation for congregations in other countries.)
If you want anymore information, feel free to write so in feedback and I'll be less than happy to find some more, but I'll do it anyway.

Have a nice day.

EDIT:
Wow, only a three. I'm disappointed. I tried my best.

Q: I'm 15 and I'll be 16 in May.I live in New York (not in the city) I'll be getting my permit in May right? B/c there were rumors that the age was being changed to 17. Is this true?

No. The age to get your permit in NY remains at 16, which expires after 3 years.

Q: As a rough percentage.. what are the chances of getting pregnant by pre-cum when there was no penetration, no penis/vagina touching.. just fingers touching lips which didnt enter either

Slim chance. Semen which carries sperm, dies within a few moments while exposed to the atmosphere. So probably roughly 2%, I want to say, though it could be more or less, since I'm no doctor.

Q: Does anyone know of any modeling schools besides Barbizon that teach you how to walk, talk and be like a model? I want to start modeling but I'm only 18.

All modeling "schools" are complete scams. The best you should do is to send in photos into modeling agencies, and if they see that you could be a profitable model, they will invest money and time into you. Schools like Barbizon and John Robert Powers are fakes that rip you off. All they're going to do is take photos of you and steal thousands of dollars from you. There are legit talent schools for acting and making Broadway stars, but modeling schools don't teach you anything. Real modeling agencies will not take your money. I suggest sending snapshots of yourself and getting an agent at the Ford Agency.

Q: so today is me and my boyfriends 1 year 6 months anniversary, and last night i had a dream that i cheated on him with his best friend! i was crying and upset in the dream, but why did i dream that? what does it mean?

Well, I, as much as a skeptic as I usually am, believe in meanings behind dreams. It does not mean that I think that you are going to cheat on your boyfriend in real life. I'm saying that it has a deeper meaning. Here's a full description: http://dreammoods.com/cgibin/searchcsv.pl?method=exact&header=dreamsymbol&search=cheating

Q: Okay, I asked a question about this before. Well, only that I was considered in being assigned into this class that I had no idea what it was, well now I know it's a class for prepps!
Okay Im not a prep. What-So-Ever! I'm not like dirt poor nasty needer of friends but I have no friends in this class. And every teacher I asked was like Ohh wow congratulations! Im like for what? I told my favorite teacher about my problem.. because I can't just drop out of this class because my Mother was imformed and she told everyone and she wont be mad she'll be dissipointed. I know I can do everything in the class which is a bunch of building stuff. Im almost possitive but today was my first class where the teacher informed everyone about what we would be doing and I kinda was a little late so I walked in maybe 6mins late asked if this was the room for G&A and kids looked at me as if I had 6 heads!! I have no friends in this class but everyone I've told was like Ohh my god stay in it dont you dare drop out this is an amazing oppurtunity. Like today Bailey was like "Are you sure youe saposed to be in this?" so being completely insulted i was like "My teacher told me that I was on the list-- So I just hope my teachers not wrong!" Trying to be nice but ohh I just wanted to smack him. Im not the kind've person to get in this. Its a bunch of smart people.. So I asked my teacher why I was even chosen she said because i think outside the box. ILL STOP I will I hate it. But Its only my first class so i should stay in and prove these little kiddies wrong! I know, but i stayed back last year and this is the second year of me being in there grade Im not the most popularist kid, or the best looking. Or anything really and I know this shouldnt madder but it does! All the girls are pretty and I feel so huge and ugly I seriously wanted to cry.. the only kid in my class thats in it with me is Adam. He was the only guy who talked to me and everyone was like Adam you talk to Katie?? And he completely was like Yeahh shes awesome. =]] Kinda made me happy but I embarressed him and I know I did:[ I can't drop out, but I like can't stand to be in the class... and the only kid who actually talks to me might like now be made fun of! I like Adam[[FRIEND]] I dont want that..=[[
I dont have the confidence to stay in this. Ive been getting the grades ever since I stayed back i didnt think anyone noticed. Well now people are stopping me in the halls! Infront of kids, be like "ohh Katie I Hear your doing so much better-- Im sooo proud of you.'" and yea im flattered but jeeeezz. I never liked being the invisible girl, but i had that class in the morning now no one will drop it its like story of the year. The smartest girl in my class Madison didnt get in and she thought she would but only a certain number of kids could and I was chosen instead of her-- now shes like out to get me NO JOKE!
I know im making this sound like end of the world but I know its not.. but why is it such a big deal?? Get over it and drop it.. No one talked to Adam! Erghh I know it isnt as horrible as Im making it out to be, people are noticing im not like my brothers but for liek 2 years nothing now im drowning in there congratulations!!!
=[[

If you were chosen for an advanced class for thinking outside the box, you must be a great thinker because you sure didn't get in there for your grammar skills. This is an issue of self esteem. You don't feel good enough and feel like you don't belong. Well, if I was in your school, I would be one of the pretty girls sitting there in the G&A class. And if you came in all slumped over and had a grimace on your face and had bad attitude and aura hanging about you, I wouldn't talk to you either. When I was about eleven, I was antisocial and obsessive. I was the weird little kid who was the outcast with one real friend in the entire class. And about halfway through seventh grade, I looked at one of the "popular" girls I saw in the hall. She was smiling and laughing and had friends around laughing and smiling too.

That was when I basically had an epiphany. That very weekend, I went to the mall with my mom and picked out "happy" clothes. I got clothes that said "I look nice and am nice". I put on a smile and brushed my hair. I went to school the following Monday and during free period, I took a breath and walked up to the girl I saw in the hall and said hi. She smiled and ever since, we have been best friends and I am friends with the people that I used to see in the hall, who I wondered how they were so popular. And you know what? No one has ever, ever, ever said to me, "I know you. You're that ugly, fat antisocial kid who was in my sixth grade class". I was a new kid in the school.

That is exactly what you need to do. Do you honestly think that those girls in class look at you and think "Oh, that girl is fat and stupid!"? No. No, they don't. They don't care. They're not out to make fun of you; they hardly notice you. You're there, but just barely to them. The class is not the problem. The problem is you.

I know because I look back and see me sitting alone while everyone works together and laughs. I realize that the reason I had no friends was that no one knew that I wanted to be friends. A smile goes a long way. This recently happened to me, actually. A girl I never even knew existed. She had been in my school for a while, but I never really noticed her or knew her name. One day I was sitting in lunch doing some homework, and a girl sits down next to me. She sits down and says hi. You remind me of her, and what you could be. Who says that you can't be friends with the pretty, smart girls? No one besides yourself. You are good enough, you just need to act the part.

Sorry if I'm being tough. I just think that you could be so much happier if you take my advice, suck it up, smile and say hi. Best of luck.

Q: OK, my love life is far too complicated to handle. I seem to have had bad luck over and over again when it comes to men (I'm 18/f by the way).

So my first boyfriend (A) I got with about 2 and a half years ago, but we broke up 6 months ago. It was totally the right thing to do - things really weren't working out (i.e he definately wasn't the guy I thought he was). Anyway, I met a new guy (B), who I dated for a bit, but then suddenly he stopped things without any real reason.

Now I'm single, and I've found that my confidence in flirting and that is completely dashed. Like I'll make out with guys when drunk (don't judge me, I'm very confused!!) but I can never establish more with them than a few text messages. And the guys that HAVE wanted to get to know me better I've lost interest in as soon as I realised. Weird, huh?

Basically, I'm not over the guy I dated after my boyfriend. And what with A getting a new girlfriend, and me not so happy this new year, I figure a bit of advice may help :)

Thanks in advance!

I know exactly the reason that the guys you made out with while drunk didn't call you back. They messaged out of guiltiness of not doing so, but did not want to establish an immediate relationship with some girl that they didn't know, and came off as "easy", the girl who kissed them while intoxicated. Not really that becoming. I suggest that you meet guys other ways; flirt in bookstores (the classic place for finding dates), cafes, restaurants, churches, the gym. Places like bookstores or church are especially good since that means that at least you're interested in some of the same stuff. And for you getting over this guy, I can't help you. Only time and some genuine fun (no drinking or sex) will heal your bruises from your past relationship.

Q: to mostly guys, but girls too - should girls shave their vaginas?

I do. I think it's the matter of preference. Most people prefer a shaved/waxed or all together almost hairless genital area for reasons of humans' natural urge of cleanliness. But it is really all up to you. I think that it's kind of nasty to just let your butt and everything be covered in hair, but that's just me.

Q: is it normal that when you smoke a cigarette it makes you lightheaded and dizzy? why is this

The carbon monoxide in the cigarette decreases blood's ability to carry oxygen to your brain. Also, for the record, go to http://www.stopsmokingcenter.net/

My ex used to smoke for a little while. He quit on salted peanuts and water, just saying. Good luck.

Q: i'm planning on looking for a job soon and as you know they usually scan your social security card when they hire you. unfortunately, my absentmindedness caused me to misplace it! my question is where do i go to request another one? at time of request, do i need to bring any documents like my birth certificate and drivers license for identification?

You go to your local S.S. office. There's a form that you can print online to save you some time by having it all filled out when you go, but you must do it in person and must show all the required I.D.s so they will send for it. It should take about 10 days to two weeks to get it, if you have all your I.D. in place when you go in. If you think that your card was stolen, like if you "misplaced" it on a bus, you should also report this.

Q: can women get pregnant if her hymen isnt broken but a guy came in her?

Yes. If semen is ejaculated into a woman's vagina, then there is the possibility that she will become pregnant.

Q:
How do you get that Google thing to post in your answer? Thanks so much!

[*search*]INSERT YOUR QUERY HERE[*/*search*]

And take out the asteriks (the little star things).

Q: I bought a lot of songs on itunes. most of them worked but some of them never downloaded. when i try to buy them it says i have already bought them and i need to check my downloads. how can i get my songs back?

Are you sure? You should a. check your account to see if each song was charged, b. look in your purchased file for them, c. do a search in your search bar for the song/artist/album and d. check your e-mail inbox for the receipts for the songs. If worst comes to worst, you can always give Apple Customer Service a ring to sort it all out, but you'll need the receipts and you'll need to let them look in your account themselves to try to recover the purchases.

Q: For English class we are doing a research paper on someone who has made a difference in society. Someone like a president or something..any ideas people?

Well, a lot of people have made differences. Your parents made a difference in the world by having you. There's one more person in the world. You could do a lot of people. There are so many, many people who make differences, important and unimportant. You could do Henry Ford, Clara Barton, Amelia Earhart, Louis Pasteur, Orville Wright, and many, many, many, many others.

As the person below me joked, you could do someone who has made a difference for the worse. You could do Adolf Hitler, Saddam Hussein, Osama bin Laden, George W. Bush, and a lot more. I think that would actually be a good question to ask your teacher and would be a more original and thoughtful take on the project, no joke.

Or, of course, you could do someone that everyone is going to have thought of; Albert Einstein, Abraham Lincoln, Rosa Parks. I'm just saying that you could do maybe Henry Ford or someone more original than these. I'm not saying that they're bad or anything, just that everyone is going to pick someone like George Washington.

Q: is it true that there is DNA in waste? so it would be a bad idea to leave it on someones porch, right? in the movies ppl never get caught, but i dont think thats what happens in real life. except that DNA testing prob takes a long time and money and effort. your thoughts?

Of course there's DNA in excretions. There is DNA is found in everything in your body, from your toenails to your hair to your skin. I know that in "Disturbia", there was a bag of waste left on his porch, but doing so is a petty crime, if a crime at all in some places. I don't think that the police are going to come down and do lab tests just to find out who left a bag of poo on your front step. If there was a death threat with it or something, then I yeah, maybe, but just a bag of poo isn't going to interest the police.

Q: do you know anything about modeling? What are some things i can do to start learning about how to model because this is my future career. I'm 14 and I want to become a model.. but i dont know how.. any tips on how to get started? Like websites on google that's helpful? Or start doing stuff like .. i dont know... any suggestions? oh and btw, youre a really good columnist! :D

Thanks. I am not, though, as good as LagunaBabe, who is one of my favorites, who was kind enough to list an extremely helpful link on the know-how of modeling. And also, when sending in pictures, be au naturale, since that info isn't on this page: http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=511390

bio

Happy 2008! My name is Dana for those of you who don't know, and I obviously love to give advice, because if I didn't, I wouldn't be here. I will pick at anyone who doesn't bother to capitalize their "I"'s or the beginnings of sentences. Proper grammar and spelling is very important to me. bcuz it Just loooks soooo sloppie when u type lyke this. So a word to the wise, and for the majority of you that it doesn't apply to, think about it, and watch yourself. Second of all, I will never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever write something that is not true. So therefore I am always right. So stand down and accept it. (Note: that also means that my "opinions" are actual facts. At least the ones I bother to write.)

Never ask me anything about how fat you are or love life. Cliched, I know, but I am heartless when it comes to the truth. If you don't know what to do with your cheating boyfriend that you still love, go ask someone else since I could not care less. Seriously.

Have a nice day!
Love,
missbananafontana

Favorite artist so far: Bob Marley
Favorite movie ever: "Breakfast at Tiffany's"
Favorite actress: Grace Kelly (as you can tell)
Favorite brand: Vineyard Vines (as you can tell)
Favorite song: "No Woman, No Cry"

WARNING:
My answers will be based on a preppy lifestyle. I am the clean, preppy sort, like the person who looks clean and classy and doesn't really notice anyone who isn't, regardless that some weirdos think that preppy people hate them. Also, if you wonder about the corrections on the answers I give, no worries; they're just simple corrections to those who don't know where to put a period, or that they have to capitalize the beginnings of sentences. Please don't be offended.