Hey :D
Im in college studying Fashion. Its been almost 4 years since I've been on advicenators.I have to admit this site has changed my world. There were days when I felt that I have the worst life on this planet and no one could be more unhappy than me. But I guess things have changed since I saw the kind of problems people face everyday. Involving myself in solving other people's problems makes me feel great. I feel like I've grown up. I am a 20 year old girl who has experienced a lot in life. Giving advice by those experiences makes me feel a better human at the end of the day. Its like stopping people from making the mistakes I have made. It's great!
So let me know if you have any problems and I will surely help you...
*kisses*
Gender: Female
Location: USA
Occupation: student
Age: 18
Member Since: March 12, 2007
Answers: 76
Last Update: April 3, 2010
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It seems like lately everything has gone wrong. I went from a straight-A honor roll student with a perfect boyfriend, captain and starting setter of the volleyball team, and a generally happy girl to a girl who got cheated on, is failing classes, and doesn't get a single minute of playing time.
I haven't slept in weeks, I'm always sad and crying, I break out every morning, I suddenly thing I'm huge but I can't stop eating, I fight with my parents, everything makes me mad, and it seems like my friends are just passing me by.
I don't have a best friend to talk to about this sort of thing and I'm just so sick of feeling sorry for myself. I've even started having thoughts of what would happen if I weren't here anymore.
What should I do? :( (link)
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If you weren't there anymore, it would affect alot of people. Like your parents and your sivvlings (if you have any). First of all do not let yourself get sucked into deppression. I know it sounds cliche but do not tell yourself that "its all because of me". First of all, if you feel your friends are passing you by, its probable that they are waiting for you to talk to them about it. Do you really take the initiative of calling them up or do you keep waiting for them to do so? Answer yourself honestly. You may think that your parents dont understand you but if you think of it, right now they are the only ones you can talk to.
You start your day by crying. How the hell do you think your day will go smoothly. Do this: When you get up early morning meditate. Just breathe in, out five times. That's all.
You have to get yourself involved in a lot of activities. Swimming, Gym IDK...Something that will get you active and help you keep your mind of alot of shit.
Just remember if you are having a tough time now, you will see better days. Just dont give up so
easily.
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okay so i have like insanely dry legs
and its really gross :( i hate it.
ive tried using creams and stuff but it just makes them greasy and disgusting and like if i put cream on before gym and stuff my legs get REALLY red because im like running and stuff and i look retarded.
is there anything i can do? helppppp please!
& thanks in advance(: (link)
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Ok do this. Everynight before you sleep, massage your legs with baby oil. Do not use oil based creams because it seems to me they dont suit you. Also instead of using creams before gym use them after it after your steam/bath. If you shave your legs then do not use soap/shaving cream because it makes skin dry. Use a conditioner instead coz after washing your legs wii be really smooth and soft.
Hope i helped.
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Hello, I'm 15/female.
THIS IS NOT LIKE THE OTHER RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS, HELP IS GREATLY APPRECIATED! ALITTLE LENGTHY.
Okay, so I've known John for almost a year now, we met in school were we have 1 class, and lunch together. We talked in school, as friends. Well the last 2 months of school her met my best friend Jess at a party, they both got drunk & you know what. Well they began to like eachother, which was great. I talked to him about her in school, not badly or anything, but he'd ask questions about a girl he liked, which is normal, right ? Okay well my Jess would fight with me & tell me he and everyone else said I was flirting with him, which I wasn't. So I talked to him about it, he never said I flirted with him. Jess also told him the exact thing, just vise-versa. Well John seemed to think she's jealous of me.
Another time we were at a party, Jess got out of control, John couldn't handle her alone & asked me to help. I did, she punched me in the face. He got mad because she was so out of control & they got into a fight. Well later on that night, he was texting me & seeing if I was okay and if I needed a ride or anything, and got into the subject that she has a lot to be jelous of me for, may I mind you they are going out now. Jess & me fought because her boyfriend talked to me, even though I did know him first..
Now they haven't been going out for a week, and a few days ago he commented me on Facebook and said, 'so you stop talking to me now" and commented my picture saying I was cute. Well I commented him back. & he started texting me again, saying things like he wanted me, would ride me all night LOL, he just kept saying he wanted me, things like that. So later on that night, he called me & was like Jess is retarded, & he three-wayed her with me, her not knowing. And he was a total ass to her, calling her slut and saying that he was talking to me and to give me all his things because he'd be seeing me, knowing she'd get mad. Well Jess and me fought again, because I commented him back and because I was talking to him. After that me & John stayed on the phone talking for almost 2 hours. He says in the middle of the conversation " Honestly can you talk to any guy like this " I said no, because I can't. Well I think he's into me, or atleast wants to 'get busy.' & in his facebook, it says like Thanks to people, I'm 2nd, right after his best friend, I'm in caps, and periods all around so I'd be noticed, he said.
He claims to not like her at all, and be 100X happier without her. Also he thinks she's a slut & liar. Also he always has weird Facebook names about her, like "She has STD's" stuff like that. Does he just like Love to Hate her, you know?
He trusts me a lot, and always came to me for help with her or when he thought she was lying btw.
Now me & him haven't talked for a few days, and he called Jess one night when he was drunk & asked her out.
To my questions,
1) Am I wrong to be talking to him when, I knew him first, even thought he's my best friends ex & she forbids us to talk.
2) Does he still like Jess ?
3) Does he like me or just want to have sex with me ?
4) Should I text him, or wait for him to text me, which he might not do ?
5)Should I give effort to him, or his he 'over it' since he hasn't bothered to text in almost a week.
6) Does he just use me to get to her(to get her angry), as she says ?
7) Any other imput is great!
Thank you so much, sorry for the length & scattered-ness. I will clarify if asked. (link)
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Ok hun,
1.you are not wrong to talk to him. I think your best friend is just posesive about him. Probably john must be telling her stuff about you to make her jealous (trust me, guys love cat fights). Just talk to him like you talk to anyone else. See if you are giving out any wrong signals at all.
2. No he does not like jess. Infact I dont think he likes any of you. This guy is bad. He likes to get attention. When jess gave him attention you didnt, which is why he was bothered and so he started talkin to you. And when he and jess stopped goin out you gave him attention and jess didnt so he asked jess out again.
3.He totally wants to have sex with you and leave you. I think that is what he's doin with jess too. This guy is a sucker for sex as i understand.The way he gives you hints about 'riding you' and stuff totaly proves it.
4.Do not text him. Wait for him to do so. And then ask him to come clear of all this. Does he like jess? If he says no then ask him why did he ask her out? And remember a guy is never too drunk to not know what he is doing, right?
5.Do not give any effort ,hun. At school just act like he is just another friend. Dont respond to his flirty behaviour. OK?
6. As I said guys love cat fights. And 2 girls fighting for him is obviously making him feel like king of the world or adonis or whatever...He wants to see to what extent the both of you can go to get to him.
7. I think since jess is your best friend you should give her a call and tell her that john is all hers and that you never liked him in that way. Tell her that you dont wanna spoil your friendship for a guy which in my case is the worst thing to happen.
Just remember that guys will come and go but having a best friend in the present times is rare. And i hope she understands.
Best Of Luck hun,
xxxxxDarkSide89xxxxxx
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Soo ive been dating this kid for the past 14 months.. We have been on and off but i think our relationhip is pretty strong.. Anywayz about a week ago i got caught smeakin over to his house for the night and his mom flipped out on me.. She completely cut me down and then kicked me out of her house.. Then she called my parents and told them that me and my boyfriend were on crack! Which is all lies. Since then my boyfriends mom took his car, threatned a restraining order againt me, tryin to get random drugs test on me and him, took his cell and pretty much isnt goin to let us see each other.. So now i cant relle see him and i barely talk to him and i feel liek things are falling apart.. He said he would do anyhting to fix out relationship... but is it relle worht it?
Please help.. (link)
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Have you ever tried talking this out with your parents? I think you should bring ur parents and his mom together for a talk. She wont listen to what you have to say but she obviously will listen to your parents. Tell your parents this
: "Mom,Dad, if you want you dont have to trust me anymore for your whole life but just this one time ...trust me. I can lie about anything but this." I think they should get convinced. But I think you should try everything to get this guy coz if it were someone else it would have been over and dont worry if a relationship is worth it it will really find a way out of the mess...
Best Of Luck hun...
xxxxxDarkSide89xxxxx
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OK. My mom recently told me that sometimes she see's spirits. She's highly Christian and so am I. She told me that she's never told anyone but me, and she told me that she hated her girft and asked God to take it away from her. Now, every scince I was like 11 i've been VERY interested in the like unknown. So naturally when she told me this I got kinda interested, and I started asking her questions, but she gets upset when I ask her question. My mom is straight up psychic and alot of things lead me to believe that, not only can she see spirits, but she can sense things. Like, she can touch u and know that you're sad or upset even if you don't show it. And like at Mac Donald's, this woman who you could tell had something wrong with her, was mumbling to herself, and started laughing this weird laugh. The woman suddenly stopped laughing and stared at me. My mom goes "Kiara she's possessed, don't look at her". And i'm like, How do u know? And she didn't reply. But anyways! I just wanted to know if i'm gunna get her gift? And no, she's not crazy, I would have never known. She said she didn't get her gift till she was about 16, and i'm only 13. (link)
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Wow!this is super interesting.Well i think you might just get your gift...but my advice is that keep this fact on the low. Dont tell anyone about this and dont think about it too much. I read somewhere that being too open about this can make negatieve vibrations prevent the gift to be yours. But i hope you get the gift!!
darkSid89
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Alright, so my boyfriend of 2 years and 4 months is finally leaving off to university in september. I am gonna be really devestated and i wanted to do something really nice for him as a good bye. I know it is like 3 months away but i want it to be big and memorable for him. The only idea i have is that i would like it to be a surprise. (link)
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When my boyfriend left for university, I made him a memory scrap book (Fabriano hardbound, 50 colored pages.) These are the things that i put in it:
1. A section of photographs of places like where we first met, kissed, wined-dined etc...
2.A section of our photographs with various people and alone.
3. A section of poems which i wrote for him.
4. A description of our relationship from the time we started dating, how he changed me, our best memories, et al..
5. A section of good-bye notes from me and all our friends.
I used a lot of deco like ribbons and sequins.
Apart from this i gave him 2 cds of our favourite songs and videos of time we spent together.
I didnt really take hm out but instead called him to my terrace at 3 in the morning. I also baked a cake for him...And we cried and celebrated and all of this at 4...It was really special and probably thats why even though he's far away we're still going strong..
Best of luck
darkSide89
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Ok, i know this is weird and probably i know the answer but i just wanna know...is there a chance you could get pregnant from having anal sex? Me and my bf kinda did it before. he wasn't in there that long and he kinda pre-d...im just really curious
(im a girl by the way xD) (link)
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You cannot get pregnant from having anal sex...But the obvious thing is that the ejaculate should not flow into your vagina from the anus...Its best not to do it in the "doggie position"...but just to be on the safer side you can have the pill...
Best of luck...
DarkSide
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Ever since I was 12 years old, I had a crush on this guy (same age). We're now both almost 16 and he still doesn't know. He's been in most of my classes from the 6th grade to the 10th grade. We don't really talk. But we sometimes sit next to eachother (either from a seating chart or somewhere else) but we still never talk. Now, believe me...the crush is HUGE. I have ALWAYS tried EVERYTHING possible to get his attention lol.
Me and this guy speak the same language. The problem is that..I think I intimidate him ??...Like, I'm one of the smartest people in my class and I think that's a big turn-off because you'll always hear the teacher calling my name as the highest score or something. I also always used to cry in the 7th/8th grade because of any bad grades, and that mightve creeped him out. (He told one of my guy friends that I annoyed him when I cried)
I REALLY like him. And I don't know what to do. I've changed since the 6th grade (I used to be fat/acne/etc) And now I think of myself as much prettier/worthier. I can't tell if he's worth it or not (seeing as how he talked "shit" about me to my guy friend)
What can I do? What would you do?
I'm too shy to flirt with him :| he doesn't even talk to me!
almost 16/f. (link)
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Seeing your position, I cant really just tell you to quit liking him... Because i know what its like being next to the one person you like alot and not uttering a word to him...But let me tell you guys dont generally think "shit" about a girl without a reason...Have you done something that creeped him???(Excluding the crying part?) The answer is probably a no. And the person who told you that the guys been talking crap about you? Is he reliable? He could be lying, you know... The best way is to talk to him...You cannot expect things to happen on its own...Start with a simple Hi (with a smile)...Later,Move on to studies (and tell him how your people force you to study so he doesn't think youre a nerd)...And Finally, move on to your life gradually... It is simple...Guy dont like girls who are shy, they like girls who speak their minds and be themselves. And about the deserving bit- I think you are the judge of that. Look at the other girls he talks to. Are they as pretty as you? If no, then he probably doesn't deserve a pretty girl like you and if yes, then YOU deserve him...
BEST OF LUCK Hun...
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what is an orgasm? ive heard people talk about them at school, but i dont know what they are. how can i get an orgasm?
-sam 13/f (link)
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Orgasm is the highest point of pleasure during a sexual activity...A girl can get an orgasm by stimulating her clitoris by herself or with the help of her partner... But trust me you are too young for it...Wait till the time is best for best results...
Best of Luck hun...
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21/f
my boyfriend and i have been together for a year and a half. when ever i preform oral sex on him i have him tell me before he ejaculates so i can stop and finish with my hand. i get grossed out by the thought of it in my mouth. this coming weekend he wants me not to stop but he says he'll wear a condom so my question is:
1. will it feel as good 2 him?
2. will it not go in my mouth?
and 3. would that work?
thanks so much! (link)
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Although it is safe to wear a condom, I believe...
1. Guys dont enjoy it with a condom because they cant feel anything...
2. You wot enjoy it unless the condom's flavoured...
3. It will stop the sperm from entering your mouth but it wont be all that great...
Best oF Luck...
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What do you think about sex before being married. I don't know if it's wrong or right so I'm asking you. Please voice opinions and experience. (link)
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Sex is something which is the outcome of your desires... If YOU ARE IN LOVE with someone and are sure about him/her and you know that he/she will be with you your entire life, then I dont think there is any problem in having sex before marriage. You cannot stay with a guy for years and years before marriage without it. It works like glue in a relationship. It eases out formal behaviour between couples. But you must realise that it is not the main thing in the relationship. On the other hand, I personally beleive that if you are not sure about a person...DONT DO IT....Stick to oral sex till then...!!!
Best of Luck...
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okay, well i'm just curious about this.
i'm on my period, and i gave my boyfriend a hand job. and he skeeted/cummed in my hand and i wiped it off, and i went to go change my pad and stuff and it touched the bottom of the pad. can i get pregnant by that?
and can you get pregnant when you're on your period? (no i did not do it when i'm on it, i'm just wondering)
is there any other way you can get pregnant besides vaginal sex? (link)
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1.You wont get pregnant if you touched the pad.
2. You wont get pregnant when you are on your periods. I dont know why people say that. I have a scientific reason for it. During your periods, the egg is discharged through the fallopian tube along with the walls of the uterus. It happens because the egg does not get fertilised and hence is wasted. It comes out as your periods. Since there is no egg hence the question of getting pregnant does not arise.
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the other day me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed. i gave him a blow job and afterwards he told me he wanted to eat me out but he was afraid he could get a std. neither of us have ever been sexually active with any one. could either of us pass a std to another or was he just saying that so he didnt have to? (link)
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He can't get an STD...But chances are YOU might get vaginal infection...So always keep yourself clean and use a special saop-free wash gel which is meant just for those regions around the vagina...And let him know that your clean and nothing will really happen...
xxxxx DaRkSiDe89 xxxxxx
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f/17
me and my boo, weve been talking for a long time like 6 months, and i think its time i ask him out since hes so shy. I seriously think hes never been in a relationship before and im surprised he grabs my hand wen we walk or puts his arms around me alot. I want to ask me out but dont know how. Hes really shy with that, and how can i ask him to be my boyfriend without flipping out, like getting a heart attack because he gets nervous?????I really want to be his girl, i need advice. How can i ask him to be my boyfriend??? (link)
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OK first of all, you're so lucky to have someone who cares for you... And the best part is, if you both date, he'll be your best friend and your bf's....
Conversations that can help:
1. You: Hey 'Boo', I've been thinkin alot...About us....you know...
Boo: Uh-huh...
You: Do you think we are friends... umm... or something more than that...
His answer will say it all. Or you can simply write a note to him
or
I know you wanna kiss him... So go for a walk...alone... take him to someplace quite and look into his eyes...And kiss his cheek...And look back into his eyes (with passion) trust me, guys always fall for this... Then if you kiss, Then its obvious that he likes you too...
Best Of Luck, sweetie, xxxxx DaRkSiDe89 xxxxx
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so ive been going out with ym boyfriend for a year and were really close. but his brother kinda sayas really perverted thinggs to me when hes not around and one time he didnt rape me but he sat on me and fingered me and i was biting him but he wouldnt get off. and he got inside me but i dont think it was rape. its really uncomfortable going over his house but he always asks me too. i dont wanna tell him but idk what to do help please. (link)
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I'm sorry hun, but you've been sexually assaulted...Which is as bad as rape...You can lodge a complaint against this to the police! Hey you've mentioned that you and your bf are really close. If you want to continue with your bf, you have to let him know... Dont make things difficult for yourself. Why dont you just talk about this to your bf when your bf's brother is there. Do not submit to that cheap dog... Stand up against this.
Best Of Luck Hun, xxxxx DaRkSiDe89 xxxxx
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Sorry for bothering you again. I was the one who sent you the question about the egg mixture to apply to my hair.
I found almond oil for $10 at GNC, but I don't even know WHERE to look for curd. Is it cheese curd? Can I buy it at the grocery store? If so, what section of the store would I find it in?
Thanks! (link)
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Hey... if you cant find curd... then milk is equally good... But be careful not to make the mixture too thin... And I'm not sure if it's cheese curd because I have an Indian neighbour who makes homemade curd...I think it's by fermenting milk...Infact she's the one who gave me this great advice... I asked her and she said you can use milk... Hope this helps... And thanx for ur ques hun...
xxxxx DaRkSiDe89 xxxxx
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i'm 15/f. my b/f and i have been goin out for a year and a half. we've only had sex once and then he used a condom. other than that he just 'sits in me' if you know what i mean. essentially it is sex but he doesn't cum in me. would there be any way i could get pregnant? from pre-ejaculation or anything?
thank you! (link)
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Although rare, you can get pregnant from pre-ejaculate... That's because as the per-ejact comes out it may pick up live sperms from the penis's previous usage... Other than that there are chances of STDs... You might as well use a condom, it doesn't make a difference and you can enjoy withiut any worries....
xxxxx DaRkSiDe89 xxxxxx
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(14/f)
When do you think is the right age to give head to a guy?
If you knew him for a long time?
My friend told me it would ruin my life if i do it
Suggestions PLEASE! (link)
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There is'nt any age to give head... It's just for fun and pleasure... If you've known him for a long time and you can trust him... Go ahead and try it... I'm sure you'll get the hang of it... And it's not like you're having full-on SEX.. It's just some nice, plesureable head... It wouldn't RUIN your life... But if your friend was talkin of STDs you might think of makin him wear a condom... But that would reduce the sensibility for the guy...
Best Of Luck for your first head...
xxxxx DaRkSiDe xxxxx
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i can not figure this out! i really like this guy let call him bob. well everytime i see him my heart pounds against my ribs like crazy i get butterflys everytime i think of him it's crazy! but then he asked my friend if i would go out with him and she said i dont know. then i got that feeling... like the feeling that your heart sank like when you really don't want to do something. i think i am afriad of commitment and having a boyfriend. i have never had a serious one. i really like to have fun but i really like bob! how can i get over these dumb commitment issues? (link)
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Commitment doesn't come as soon as you start dating a person... You start of with this liking thing... And then if you really like him and you think that he's the best thing that's ever happened to you.. Just tell him that you love him... Or wait for him to tell you that and then think if you are ready for commitment... Trust me, if either one of you will not be commited you will find better people for yourself... You likie him... and you are sure he likes you...then why wait...Enjoy life without these issues...You wont even know when you when you'll fall in love...
Best Of Luck Sweetie... xxxxx DaRkSiDe89 xxxxx
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ahh so i dont know what to do. theres this [white] guy who recently got transferred to my school from a rather, mind you, 'ghetto' school in another county. hes like one of them skater guys but talks like a gangster kinda and is the total quiet but hard bad boy, but is a sweetheart when you talk to him.. kinda like eminems character in 8 mile. i dont know why, but recently ive become super attracted to guys like that. i guess its because he reminds me of my cousins ex, but i never liked my cousins ex like that?? so i dont know. anyway, ive talked to him once for like 5 minutes, so really i dont him at all, but im falling for him just because of his "type". and i have a boyfriend that im crazy about and no i dont wanna leave him. i just gotta snap myself out of likin this other guy, but i dont know how.. ahh annoying right? any help is appreciated! oh and hes in my class & lunch soo yeah kinda hard to avoid him because im obviously aware of his presence.. (link)
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I have the same creepy problem... What I do is that whenevr I see myself thinkin of this other guy... I immediately call up my boyfriend and talk to him to remind myself that there just CANNOT be a better guy than my baby... And now I've kinda got over that other guy and even made him my friend. The trick is to not make such a big deal about it and just be normal in front of the guy. Hang out with your bf mnore often to stop thinkin about this and even hang out with ur bf in front of that other guy... This way, even if the skater boy likes YOU he will get it that you love your bf alot and his feelings moight just stop...
Best of Luck Sweetie...
xxxxx DaRkSiDe89 xxxxx
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