Hello, My name is Eva. I am from a small town in Texas but I currently reside in San Antonio. I have been married forever, have 3 children, and come from a big family. Needless to say, I've been through it. Drop me a line if you would like my advice. I love to help others whenever possible, and I will do my best to help you.
Gender: Female
Member Since: October 5, 2005
Answers: 64
Last Update: November 11, 2005
Visitors: 5237
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Ok well me and my boyfriend have been going out a very long time and i really do love him!! But then i have this friend that he really doesnt like and she is like my best friend and shes alwayz with me!! well yesterday we got in a arguement about it and he says he doesnt no y i hang out with her and i dunno but i dun think he wants me to be her friend so its him or her i dunno what to doo but i want them both?
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A boyfriend should never get in the way of a friendship. Girl friends are forever, we need them to get through all the crap that guys put us through.
Is this girl friend a good friend to you? If she is than why even consider getting rid of the friendship. Now if she was a bad friend, I might consider it.
Never let a guy dictate what friends you can and cannot have. If keeping the girl friend is important to you, than you need to let him know this. Let him know that if he cares about you he will do his best to resolve his feelings towards this friend. If he doesnt care to do that, than maybe he is too selfish and is not the right guy for you. If he trully cares about you, he will try.
Eva J
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I need some help from you woman only please. Some nights may husband is in the mood and we could go for a long time and other nights he just pushes me away and tells me that he's not in the mood. But when he's in the mood I better be. On fridays nights he'll stay out until 2:00am and that. I have asked him he's cheating and he tells me no.Should I believe him that he's not
cheating on me and let it go.
Hope someone can help. (link)
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First of all... I just dont get it. I have been married for about 19 years and I just dont get how other women have their husbands stay out til 2am. Is this an every friday thing or just once in a long while thing. Cuz there is no way i could deal with it. Unless it was just once in while. If he has the energy to stay out that late than he should have the energy to give you some when you want it.
As for him cheating... I dont want to assume but he for damn sure is not taking your feelings into consideration. A husband and wife should never tell each other NO. If he wants it, give it to him and He should return the favor. Discuss this with him... If he doesnt care to fix this problem, then I have to admit, I would definately be suspicious.
Let him know that it is very important for the relationship that this be resolved.
Eva J
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alrite 1year ago doctor said i had carpal tunnel he gave me a brace to wear it didnt work so he then gave me a splint(like a half cast goes on the bottom half of your arm) i wore that for about 4 months. he said it would last about 6months but it is still hurting a yr later.. i put the brace on it like 4 days ago and only take it off to take a shower. but i is hurting really bad and mom says i just aggraveted the nerves i want to go to the doctor again.. to see if anything else is wrong.. should i or do u thing it is still the carpal tunnel??
answers a.s.a.p would be really nice thx
ill rate 5 unless u give me crappy answer..
kim 16/f (link)
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I dont know if the doctor tried to give you any excercises to help. There are some exercises that should be done to alleviate the pain. Ask your doctor about these exercises. I know that one is placing your hands together like praying hands, pointing you fingers toward your chest and pushing your hands away from you body while still keeping your palms together. If you dont understand ask your doctor.
Another thing that doctors dont usually tell you is that there are some foods that can increase your risks of carpal tunnel and make it worse if you have it. Now, I have been trying to look it up but cant seem to find it. It is either Red or Yellow dye that can hurt you. Do you drink alot of red or orange soda, because this could just make it worse.
You might try looking into natural cures for carpal tunnel.. Its better than surgery.
Eva j
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What do you do when you've got two people that really like each other but they are both really shy?
The guy that I like ( and he likes me back) is really shy. We've done things together as friends like played tennis and gone to hockey games. But he's never tried to kiss me or even go to second base with me. The most we have done is hugged each other. I'm really shy too so I've never tried anything with him, but I'm worried that if I keep waiting for him to make the first move it will never happen!
I want to break out of character and make the first move the next time I see him.
Does anyone have any advice on how I could do this without freaking him out! (link)
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I would start with giving a him a kiss on the cheek.. then see how he reacts to that. I was in the same situation. I really liked this guy and he just wouldnt make a move. I did the kiss on the cheek.. I could tell he liked it, but he was still too shy to make a move. I had to make the first real move. We are married now. Just go with your feelings.
Good Luck,
Eva J
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i seem to be targetted by vandals at my home
whilst on holiday vandals climbed over an 8' gate and broke a window in my vehicle - police didn't bother to come out!
I have had missiles thrown down the drive hitting my rear door and garage
Banana skins dropped at the top of the drive
and an 8' cane thrown at the drive gates
this has been going on for some months now - I have never seen anyone to be able to identify them
not sure how to react - do i just ignore it and hope they get bored?
I am on my own and getting very restless about this I can't understand why i am being targetted
any suggestions would be gratefully received.
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You should go to the police... if they dont take it seriously, then its time to get a security system with cameras. The cameras will help to get information back to the police that you are serious about having this stopped, as well as proof of who is doing this to you. This might be costly but it would be worth it. In the mean time a dog helps a bit. Sometimes this will scare them away .. but they can still throwing things onto your property. The best thing is a security system with video cameras.
Good Luck,
Eva J
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RESPOND TO ASAP :)
ok so me and my boyfriend have been going out 1 month this tuesday. but the only thing we've done is cuddled and like 1 kiss. it was just a peck too. :( he thinks i've made out before, EVERYONE does.. maybe because i told them i have. just because i didnt want to seem like a loser. so everyone thinks ive madeout before, so my boyfriend matt is really wondering why im not making out with him. well i just, dont know what to do. when i kissed him two wednesdays ago, i just like kept my mouth half open, because i never knew like, what i should do.. so then yeah idk tonight we're going to a football game, and football games are makeout central, and i know he wants to make out with me.. and i know hes gonna start to, but i dont know what to do!
HELP. ASAP (link)
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It doesnt matter how many times you have made out... it is always different with a new person. Everyone is nervous the first time. Just take it slow ... go with your feelings.. you can always slow him down if he moves too fast for you. All you have to do is pull away for a second and start over. Relax .. if you are not ready ... dont do it. You should never do anything you are not comfortable with.
Good Luck,
Eva J
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well i went out with this guy for 16mths and we broke up coz he cheated on me with alot of my mates i know its bad but were been broken up now for 6 mths and out of the blue i get this email i wana be mates and i still like you and all the rest of it i realy want to be mates but i know i love him to much to just be mates but i dont want to get back to gether with him coz i know ill only get hert agian and yet i also want to be mates im so confused i know i shouldnt go back but it realy herts deep down i dont know what to do please just help me i realy carnt deal with this on my own (link)
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I would give it a try at friendship... but as a friend you have to be willing to see him around others that he might date. If you dont think that you can handle it then dont do it. But on the other hand you might find out that he is a better friend than a boyfriend. Maybe being his friend will help you get over how much he hurt you.. he might even begin to realize how much he hurt you and try to make it up to you.
As far as you still loving him... you can love a friend. Just take it one day at a time. Only time can tell where this will lead you.
Eva J
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OMG!I told one of my friends (we just became friends this year) that I liked this guy. He is kind of a flirt but not too bad, and what happens the next day? She flirts with him more than usual and he didnt even talk to me once! Ugh how can I steal him back from the B-word!!!!!!!!! (link)
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Well.... Is it obvious that she is flirting. I mean do you think that the guy really knows that she is flirting. Does he like it? If he does than (without overdoing it) do a little flirting yourself. But try not to seem like you are trying to compete for his attention. If he doesn't like the fact that she is flirting with him, why dont you just try talking to him about things that you know that he is interested in. Get his attention away from her. Music will usually be a good topic. Find out what kinds of bands he likes. Oh and dont forget to be yourself, no one likes it when you seem like a fake. If you see that he starts to become interested in what you have to say... slowly flirt a little more..(be subtle)
Good luck,
Eva J
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Last weekend, a guy asked me out at my birthday party - I don't know him very well, but he did help me set up the party with a bunch of other people, and from what I've heard, he's a good guy. So I asked for his number and said I'd call him, and I did, and I said no, and told him it was because we didn't know each other very well, and maybe over time something could happen - and I wasn't lying. Okay, so that was the end of that. Yesterday I saw him at a party and I sort of had nooo idea what to say. He came over and sat next to me and he is reallly, reallly nice...now I'm the kind of girl that always snorts at my friends when they talk about butterflies and being in love and stuff, because we're 15 and I dont think relationships at this age work all that well.
So I kind of don't know what to do, cause everytime I see him I dont know what to sayyy, like how to have a conversation with him, cause I've always been so skeptical about relationships. So, please help me cause I'm a little bit confused here. What do I say to him when I see him, like at parties or wherever? I always thought that I knew so much about all this relationship stuff but it turned out I dont (x_x). (link)
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You know what's funny is that we do are best at relationships when we dont stress about it. Let it happen naturally. Just try to be yourself and forget about the relationship stuff.
About your skepticism... that's natural. We see people around us getting their hearts broken and we start to feel that we are never gonna allow ourselves to get in that position. The truth is that a broken heart now and then is what helps us grow to be a better person for the one that is meant to be.
Everything great has its risks. Dont be afraid, be yourself and be willing to take that risk.
Good Luck,
Eva J
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right i think i like two guys and i can't pick between them they both told me they have feelings for me and they have both asked me out and because i could not pick i said no to them both. So heres the thing Jacks a muslim it will never be allowed by my mum if she found out she would go mad. James would be allowed its just i don't spend much time with james everyone says how cute me and james would be... but james just seems like he never wants to be with me in college. i am not sure what to do.someone help please. thank you. (link)
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I would give James a try... He did ask you out and you dont have to be stressed about your parents completely disapproving. When in college most are just beginning to feel their freedom so he might not want to feel attached right now. But that could change.. you know he's been interested. Just keep in touch and your presence will remind him that he does find you attractive. If he is okay with being your friend now... it might turn into more later.
Just remember things take time. You have to also ask yourself if He is worth the time. In the mean time... you may meet someone else.
Eva J
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Ugh, you have no idea how fed up I am with periods.. I get depressed because I get them. Basically my question is, is there any chance that I can make the flow a little less and is there any way I get rid of periods by surgery?? By like removing the eggs or something.. Please help!! I just want to die.. grr (link)
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I dont think that you should get rid of the periods completely but I think that there are some pills, or a shot that can do that. You might want to ask your doctor about it. They will advise you on what is best for your age. I do know that taking the pill should help with both the flow or your period and the PMS that comes with it. It sure worked for me... and the added benefit is that your complexion will be great.
Eva J
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what should i get peirced for my 18th birthday. i was thinkin nipples, i dont know why. It sounds like that would hurt more than some other places, though. I dont know..... how much do body peircing usually cost? anyone know? (link)
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I have always liked the belly button peircing ... i think that it looks cute and you can show it off more easily than the nipple peircing. You can decide afterward if you want to go for the nipples.
The cost is probably gonna start at about $40 depending on the type of metal that you would like to use. Make sure that you are not allergic to the nickle in some body jewelry, or it can get pretty messy.
Eva J
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hi
my name is amin.first i want to thank you for your free services and i want to know that is ther any natural exercise or way to increase
my length.i am 18 years old and my length is
about 177 cm.
cincerely you nima
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If by length you mean you height, I have read that you can increase your height by doing some stretching exercises. I have not tried this myself but you might want to read about it yourself and give it a try.
Here are some sites that you can go to and read more about this. http://web.ask.com/web?o=0&qsrc=19&q=how+can+i+increase+height+through+exercise
Or you can just go to www.ask.com and type in How can I increase height through exercise?
Eva J
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Ok. 13/m. I don't know if this question goes under Families or Work/School Relationships. Sorry it's so long. I'm really worried for my sister (14/f). She just found her first date at school this year. They went to the movies and all. My sister was just sitting there waiting for him to do something. She had her arm on the armrest the whole time waiting for him to hold it or something. She bought Junior Mints "just in case"---didn't use a single one. She could've talked to me. I've been asking and answering Advicenator questions for months now. I pretty much know what's going to happen and the pains she's going to feel. But no. She doesn't like to tell me stuff. Instead, she tells our cousin, who has serious boy problems. Boys rule her life. Her Bat Mitzvah was ruined because her newest ex was there. She couldn't enjoy Avenue Q because one of her exes liked it. She has serious issues. I know that. My parents know that. My sister just doesn't seem to get it, so she talks to her for advice.
My cousin is saying things like "Well, if he doesn't want to hold your hand, he must not be right. Dump him." or "Try rushing him, that usually works for me." I eavesdrop on their conversations because I'm concerned. I want her to listen to me. I've gotten chances to talk to her which I of course took advantage of, but she refuses to understand. She doesn't believe that she'll face hate, jealousy, rejection, etc. I felt most of it first-hand, but as for the parts actually IN the dating, I couldn't get that far. She doesn't think I know enough. Just because I'm younger and haven't actually dated doesn't mean that I haven't felt jealousy and rejection, I haven't been extremely depressed, etc.
How can I get her to listen to me? Thanks.
By the way, don't say to write in a diary. I'm already doing that, but my parents confiscated it last night for writing after dark. (link)
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Unfortunately when it comes to sisters there is alot of pride and ego that gets in the way. She might say that you dont know what you are talking about, but a small part of her is probably still listening. Just keeping letting her know that you only have her best interest in mind. Tell her that you only want to help and that you will be there for her is she ever would like to confide in you. But that is about all that you can do. If she does get her heart broken... Just be there for her. Dont tell her " I told you so" She will learn to trust you.
I have two daughters and they just about never would admit that they listen to what the other is saying. But I can see that they actually do. Still sometimes we feel that we have to find things out for ourselves. So we are left to find things out the hard way. Just be there in the end and things will get better.
Good Luck
Eva J
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When I get made at my mom because of something she said to me or something she wont let me do I get really really upset and basically start talking back to her and saying things I shouldn't then storm upstairs. After a few minutes of being unbelievably mad, I realize that I over reacted and go back down stairs and ask her if she needs help or something. It happens all the time. And because I do it alot, my mom now thinks I have mood swings. But, I don't, I just always feel sorry about the way I talked to her. I know it's something I need to change and I'm working on it because I know I shouldn't treat her that way. But, while I’m working on it, how can I convince her that I do not have mood swings? (link)
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You know... I dont know exactly how old you are but if you are in your teens, it is perfectly normal to have some sort of mood swings. This is not like some kind of lable saying that you are crazy of something. Hormones in a teenager may make you seem a little back and forth sometimes. Teenagers have temper tantroms and it is actually a good thing that you actually take the time to go and (in your way) apologize. Just take the time to sit down with your mom and explain that you just get so upset sometimes and although you are just now learning how to handle it, you are sorry for the way that you react. It will all work itself out with a little patience on both your part and your moms.
Eva J
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how do i get rid of stress? i feel bad after breaking up with some1...like realllllly bad..please give me some suggestions♥ (link)
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I think that the best way to get rid of stress is to work out. Working out release endorphines in your body that actually improve your mood. You will feel better and get in good shape.
This person you broke up with might even have some regrets after seeing you in better shape.
Eva J
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14/F--
I know it's early...but my mom is asking me to conduct a christmas list for gifts early.
What might be some things I could ask for?
I want MOVIES but I need some suggestions for good ones new/old alike.
As far as C.D.'s go I like Country music...any suggestions?
I already have an Apple iPod (mini) (link)
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If you are having this difficult a time. Maybe you already have everything you need. Just carry a pen and paper with you though out the day. When you find yourself saying to yourself, "it would be nice to have that".... jot it down.
Or tell your mom that gift cards would be great ... Do you like to shop?
Eva J
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idk wut category this goes under. :oP
BUT
is it bad to sleep with eyeliner/maschera on? (link)
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Actually sleeping with your eyemake could eventually cause the glands in yours eyes to clog. This can cause either an infection like pink eye, swollen gland or chalacian, or even a stye. You really want to let your eyes breath, so take off your make up before you go to sleep. If you forget once in a while, it should be okay.
Eva J
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I realize that this is a question asked millions of times per day and that I normally skip over questions like these. Please don't do that here. There's this guy in one of my classes, and I like him. Since the beginning of the year, he's been emphasising the traits that we have in common. For example, I am an unuually loud and outgoing person. He has become loud and seems really confident. Plus he has style and is so cute. He's funny and makes me smile. Lately, he's been walking 1/2way to my next class with me and today his arm was around me for like a long time. I haven't really had any experience with guys, but I am in high school, and so is he. Do you think that he's being friendly, or that he likes me? Thanks for not disregarding this question, and I will rate well for genuine advice! (link)
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It does seem that he likes you. Although at times when people get to be more outgoing they also tend to be more touchy feely with others in general. We also tend to hang around those that have the same traits. Watch him and see if is treating anyone else the same way he treats you. Does he walk anyone else half way to class.
He may very well like you, but not in the same way that you like him. Hey if all else fails, there is no harm in just asking him. If he doesnt already like you that way, he might grow to like you that way.
Eva J
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ok, my friend andy invited me to sleepover on friday night. hes having a sleepover and i really wanna go. the only thing is... im a girl... and andy is a guy so my parents will probably say no. my friend tia is going too... but i dont think that will help convince them much. im thinking about saying im sleeping over tias and then going with her to andys... but im scared my parents would find out... what should i do? please help me... (link)
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Your parents will find out. Are they the type that will check up on you once in a while? Do you have any friends that might accidently spill the beans? I would just ask them, that is if you really want to go. Maybe they can meet Andy's parents. Are they going to be there?
Heres the thing. If you lie, and you get caught. Your parents will have a very hard time trusting you in the future. Funny thing about trust. It is very easy to lose someones trust and it is very difficult to earn it back. You can always lie and hope for the best but eventually parents find out. Do you want their trust?
Eva J
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