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March 14, 2004Answers:
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What's up? Well, I'm sure like each and every other advice columnist is that, we all enjoy giving advice . I like to keep things real and you'll find out how real when you ask me a question . I absolutely love helping people . Hollah at me sometimes !!! Oh, and yahoo me . Goodness sakes knows that I could do with the mail.
advice
I'm 13/F, barely 5'2, and about 112lbs. I know my weight is fine for my height and age and everything, but i really have a lack of self confidence... ever since i was little i was this super skinny tiny little girl. Now I'm getting much fatter. My stomach just has soo much fat on it. I'd just like to tone it down, and keep it flatter, maybe get some abs. Summer is almost here, and I go to high school in august. I know i need to exercise, but eating is my problem too. I eat alot of junk food, and i am a very picky eater. I don't eat meat, fish, poltury(chicken, etc). I also dont eat beans, nuts, or vegtables! (i'll eat potatoes, raw carrots, and that's it.) The thing is i mainly eat breads, dariy, and some fruits. I know this kind of eating is also not helping my body. i can try to force myself to eat like salads and stuff, but it's so hard beacause i end up almost throwing up. I'm also stressed most of the time, and very busy. I have minimal time to exercise, and not alot of resources. I have an ab thingy called the ab scissors... but i dont like it very much. I'm also not familar with how to do good exercises. So what are some ways i could lose so weight, but mostly loose my excess fat???? Thanks!! I'll be sure to rate good, thoughtful, helpful answers.
You say that you don't have a lot of time, but honey if you want to lose that weight you'll have to make the time of day. I know that you're probably busy but you really need to. Just do some sit-ups and easy does the trick. Don't over-due anything. Relax and if you can get your hands on some salad, then do that too. Sit-ups will do the trick. Try strtches too. Sort of yoga-like. They're really soothing once you finish them. Oh, and relax. Once you're done with this, try to become more confident you know because I think that your weight is good and that your weight really isn't the issue here. Sorry to say it , but it's really you. You need to work on self confidence honey because you may just be too hard on yourself or extraordinary. Well, hope I was some help and have a nice day.
I really want to get my fake nails taken off. Does anyone know how you can remove them other than chipping them off and going to the nail place (not an option as of this moment)?
Soak your hands in either finger nail polish remover of white alcohol to get it removed. You'll have to do this for some time but it'll work. Hope I was some help and have a nice day.
what kind of exercises are there that will tone the chest area, i'm a girl who wants tips to strengthen the bust
Chin up, push ups, and cut on fats, oils, and sweets. That's really almost about it. And-oh-stay away from starchy foods. Hope I was some help and have a nice day.
mah friend has been sick lately and he has missed like 2 weeks...the other day he was in a wheelchair..he told me that people at skool have been talking about him and he wanted to kno who they where...they where saying stuff like hes gay or hes just faking it...even his friends said it...im like the only girl friend he has but now its like im the only friend he has..i dont kno wat to do to make him feel better?!??!! HELP!!
Let him know that you wouldn't stoop low as to treachery and that you really wouldn't hurt him. The way you're feeling right now about the issue is what you need to explain. You need to tell him because that's just the only way that you'll find out. Let him know that you're there for him . That's really all you can do about this. Oh and don't do any sorts of gestures that will make him think that you're fronting. Just be you and tell him how you really feel. Hope I was some help and have a nice day.
OK, Ill try again, with no offensive stuff.
This girl i know did something. And now shes flirting with me alot more, i dont know if she wants to go out with me, or just flirt.
The only way you'll ever know is if you ask. You and I aren't mind-readers. Just-well-if you like what you see, go for it. Good luck if that's your decision.
My dad has a substance abuse problem. But he won't admit it. In fact, he lies about it and says he doesn't do anything! My dad uses chewing tobacco. That's not TOO bad, but he swallows it. And he goes through a can in a day and a half. If you're familiar, chewing tobacco (Copenhagen) is just as expensive as a pack of cigarettes. My family lives on a farm, we have farm animals, and we're not rich. We don't have the extra pocket money to buy things like tobacco. I've tried to get my dad to stop. Not only is it irritating that he lies and says he doesn't use tobacco, he's putting his health in danger. My family wouldn't be able to make it if he were to die – we'd have no source of income. I've tried talking to my dad, I've tried talking to my mom, I've tried throwing the junk away when I find it... I've written letters to my dad etc, etc. Last night, I found a BUNCH of his Copenhagen hidden in his boat. (No, I wasn't looking for it; I was taking care of the rabbits – which sit on the boat) I opened all the cans of tobacco and put duck, fish and rabbit food in the tobacco. This morning, all of the cans had been thrown away. I don't know what else to do! I can't keep searching for tobacco and putting duck food in it! He denies that he uses tobacco and my mom can't do anything about it. He's probably mad at me because I put duck food in his tobacco (I'm the only one who would do something like that) ... what do I do now? It really scares me that he's doing this. I don't want to lose my dad.
Your dad doesn't want to change . Like someone in my family doesn't want to. But you know some men are really stubborn and they don't really change their minds once they have them made up. So what you have to do is decide whether this is worth losing your dad over. I know that you really are worried and I see why. But it really all comes down to the fact that it's his life and whatever he chooses to do is of his own business. No matter how dramatic the effect is on your family. I'm not of course saying to be okay with what he's doing, I'm just trying to tell you to decide what's more important and what do you want that's best for you, your dad, and possibly your family. I hope I was some help and have a lovely day.
soz if this is a bit long, but really need help. I RATE HIGH!!
im 15 f and yesterday me and my dad went out and after we went to the pub. after about 1 and a half hours at the pub we decided 2 ring my mum to tell her how long we will be. she was fine with that. and then about 15 mins later we decided 2 ring her again and ask her what pizza she would like and if she would order it (we deceided earlier in the day that we wonted pizza 4 tea)n she said she'd already had her tea, so when we got home, she started shouting at my dad and saying things like 'i wish you came home earlier' and things like that. they both started arguing and got me and ma brother upset (hez 11) and now they are not talking, but my worry is that we are going on holiday this sat and i want them to be friends again! SOMEONE PLZE HELP.
Your parents will work it out on their own. They're married and verbal disagreements are obviously going to occur and everything. All you have to do is be patient and understanding. They argue because that's just one of the many things that they actually do . You can't help it. They can't. If they don't get it together befor the holiday, then I guess it really wasn't meant to be; by this I mean the trip for them. They'll resolve the issue but what's really important is that they resolve it on their own time. No rushing. On their own time. Hope I was some help and have a nice day.
Hey, I'm doing a presentation on the Vietnam War [how it started, more like], and I thought I would read a poem about it out loud. I know there are a lot, but one of my friends says that there is one in particular thats very famous. So if you all could list the name and author of any poem about the Vietnam War that you know, it would help. A few ideas about what else I could include in my presentation for visuals would help, since a board with pictures on it is not recommended. Thank you.
I know not about the poems but I do know that you'd probably like to include how the war affected this country, it's citizens and the economy. Shouldn't be too hard to find on jeeves. Also you might want to find out the affect on the citizens of Vietnamese, and you probably want to find out something about the country that was a good, positive, and negative effect of the war. I hope I was some sort of help. Nice day
i'm currently a senior in high school (counting down the last few days before graduation!) and over the last year, i've met an incredible friend. i met him last august, but over the last nine months, we have grown to have the most complex friendship i have ever had in my entire life; we immediately connected, both having similar interests in literature, music, opera, coffee, etc. he is a year younger than i am, thus when i leave for college, he will be in his last year of high school.
he is currently going through a lot of emotional pain and stress in his life. i admire him him so much for all he does; his parents have just recently separated and he takes care of his two younger sister. i see how he takes charge, takes on more responsibilities than either of his parents do. in addition, he has grown to be an extremely central part of my life.
i'm going to be a good five hours away from my friend next year. he isn't very close with many other kids in our school, or even outside of school, thus i know our separation is going to hurt him (as well as me!). i keep telling him i'm going to come back and visit, that i want to see him and i'm looking forward to seeing him in the school musical next year.. he insists that once i'm gone, i'm not going to come back; he insisted the other day he feels as though he is inferior to me (which i don't understand, considering he is extremely smart, did much better on his sats than i ever did, and has a musical gift).
i have seen how he has lost a lot of people in his life; he refrains from expressing much emotion around me because i believe he is afraid to let me in, afraid of losing me.. how can i assure him that i will keep in touch, that i will come back, that he won't lose me? i tell him constantly that he means to much to me, that he is unlike anyone i have ever met.. but i fear i tell him too often and it all sounds so fake..
He feels that he is inferior to you obviously because there may be certain qualities that you possess that he may of course may covet. He lacks certain friends and he has too much responsibility. I don't know exactly what you want advice on, but I do know that you need to do your absolute best to talk to him over the phone. To be there for him to show him that you really and absolutely care about him. Email, phone, weekend visits, surprise visits, and etc. Try your best to show him that you care and that not a lot will change . If you can, try to find a certain burden to relieve . Just be there for him. Both for when he needs you and when he doesn't need you .
Okay I am 14 and a girl.. and The guy I am with is 22 and a guy.. He works at a jail.. Do u think it is wrong for us to 'be together'
Yes, I definitely think that. He's 8 years older than you are. Maybe you think that you are in love but really now. Be sensible . Be reasonable and for heavens sake honey use logic. This is not good and healthy. And worst of it is, if someone were to discover "this/your being together" then you could get yourself and HIM in major trouble. If you care for him, you wouldn't risk it. And if you care about yourself, you'd see that it's too much trouble and pain future-wise. Sorry if this is harsh but I have to be honest with you. Have a nice day.
My friend Cindy, is kinda always the center of attention. well she don't get that much attention but... Ok! She sometimes asks me to come somewher with her and so i ask my mom and she said yes, so i go with her, she said we were going to her uncle's house who is a famous foot ball player. We were ther right so, an insy bit of her family is there, and some other people were there, so this 1 time music was playing and everyone wanted her to dance, and she all shy and said she din't want to. then all of a sudden she goes up ther and sart doing the chicken head dance.But my piont is, I don't want to go anywhere with her if she just going to end up every body pays attention here. Cindy also acts the same, thinking she the center of attention. But if she tells or writes me a note asking me if i want to go any where else with her,and some of her family, and her family's friends are there then what should I say? Right now I am almost close to not being her friend because I hate the way she act, Cause she also think she pretty and act like she....OOOOOOOOhhhhhh!!!! Ok I'm just saying she's REALLY starting to PISS me off right now.
Don't you think that you may be too over dramatic about your friend. Well, perhaps she likes attention because she doesn't receive much. Is that so bad for her? Is it healthy attention or is it completely just going to her head? If it's going to her head, then you really need to talk to her about it. Let me give you some advice about this. In friendships there are compromises of certain circumstances that vary of all kinds. But that is why you compromise . Deal with it. Support her. But if you really don't want to be the true friend , then don't waste your time with her. Like you sort of said, if she thinks the sun rises and sets when she says it does, then move onto another friend if you can't deal with it. I know that I sound harsh and everything but it is just being brutally honest .Try to savor the friendship. If that doesn't work out, then move on.
I am a 20 years old horny virgin lives in toronto.
You know any girl wants a one night stand thing in toronto area?
Give them my msn
torontoguy_8@hotmail.com
No, I'm really sorry because I don't live in Toronto. You could try going to clubs and partying of all sorts. I'm really sorry that I was of no help. Have a nice day.
ok ... so my mom said that if i loose 10 pounds shed give me 100 dollers!! the problem is..i dont know how.. i cant exercise regularly cause i never have time im always doing soemthing and i cant really eat special things cause one weekend im with my dad and one day during the week i am with him...i dont kno what to do i need HELP! what could i do to loose weight??????????? thank you sooo so much! OxoxO
Lay off rice,bread,snickers, or any other chocolate that you may find. Lay off starchy food . Lay off meat . Only at least two servings a day. If you can, try to walk fast and I mean really fast. Hasten those footsteps . Those will shape your calfs a lot . If you can, when you have free time, try to do sit ups . I know it's hard but you'll really like it once you get used to it .
Ok.. well my mom works for social services. and she got this job when i was in third grade (i'm currentlly in 8th) and ever since then shes been SO overprotective. She doesn't like for me to do things without her knowing every single detail. She's takin the lock off my bedroom door. so that she can walk in at any given moment just to see what i'm doing. And it's getting worse every day. Even when i was in 3rd grade i didn't have a 'bed time' but now she's making me go to bed at 9 oclock. it's getting really bad. i'm getting ready to be in high school and i still have a bedtime. i feel like such a child because i never get to do anything. And i've tried talking to her. And i've told her that i think she is to protective. Yet nothing ever changes. What should i do?
14/f
Yeah, my parents are overprotective too. If she works with social service, she's probably seen a lot of things that happen to kids(preferably girls) of your age. She just wants to protect you because she loves you. But there's a difference between protecting and then smothering. You really need to talk to your mother. Tell her that you have to write your very own story and that this over protective-ness is doing you no good at all. Let her know that you know why she's doing and don't ever say that you understand why unless your parent isn't controlling . Tell her she is smothering you and that it's wrong. Mention that this could cause you to be more rebellious if you lose too much freedom. Just try to be calm .
Okay my period has been going on for 1 month and i don't know what to do. It this normal or is something wrong? i don't feel comterbal to talk to my mom about this only advice colums and my friend. i need help FAST!!!!! Because me my friend won a trip to hawaii and we leave in 1 week. F/13 p.s. if it helps this is my second period.
Of course this is so normal . You must be new at your period, I assume, since you said this is your second period. When I had begun mine, it stayed of for 2 months and 1 week so you're a bit lucky. Just chill out and don't worry. It will go off eventually it's just a way of your body getting used to the blood regulation because it's your 2nd period. That's normal. So chill out. AND if you need any help with how to have a babin' suit on when your period is on, ask me a question and I'll give you some tips on how to cover it up. I know this is hard to say this but really. Don't worry unless you've had sex with someone which I doubt you have. IF you have, I really suggest you talk to your parents. Hope I was some help and have a nice day.
SRY THIS IS LONG ILL RATE A 5 TO ANY1 WHO ANSWERS IT!!!
okay..im really confused and have no idea what to do...im stuck between 2 guys...the one guy i went out with for about 8 months and we recently broke up about a month and a half ago...well all of a sudden after a month of not talking to me he calls me and says he misses me and wants to get back together with me...the other guy i went out with about a year and a half ago...we have been good friends ever since we broke up...and he recently had a gf but broke up with her bc he liked me and wants to go out with me...i dont know what to do bc i like both of them sooo much and it's so hard...i thought it was going to b easy bc the one guy i thought we werent going to talk to again...SOMEONE HELP PLEASE!!
Pause for a moment and ask yourself: what do I want in a man? These can be qualities, attitude, or any other thing that you find in your "dream guy" or a guy that you prefer . Have you thought about it. Think about it for a few seconds longer. Done. Okay. Now think: who has more in common with my "dream guy" ? When you are thinking about this, you need to think which one am I the most comfortable with . Who do I feel safe around? WHICH ONE WOULDN'T USE ME AS A REBOUND WHEN THEY'RE THROUGH WITH ME? Which one can I trust ? Think about questions like this and whatever question or issue that comes to your mind afterwards, try to the best of your abilities to answer them. Once you've done that, then maybe you'll have a better clue to WHAT YOU WANT AND WHO CAN GIVE THAT TO YOU. Just think about it. And don't stress yourself. You aren't getting married honey. Hope I was some help. Have a lovely day.
well i was how do i tell my mom that i am ready to have sex? i'm 15 and a female.
Tell your mom some reasons why you are ready to have sex and differentiate between the fact that you are having sex or the fact that you are pondering having sex. If you are actually having sex, I'd tell your mother that you are going to begin all sorts of protection and that's if you're doing this . I'm not saying that you are . Hope i WAS SOME HELP . SEE YAH
Hey wat do laxatives really do ? i know i should know this but everyone says something different?
Thanks~
I think they are used to make doing No.2 easier and to cleanse yourself out . Basically, bowel movements . Hope I was some help. Have a nice day.
i really like this boy, and my friend found out that i liked him, and she's being stirring rumours that arent true and she found out that the boy i like has alot of common things with me and she is trying to be his perfect image which is me i recently found out that they are going out what should i do
i dont understand why she didnt want to tell me to see how i feel about it
please help
Probably because she sees it as the same reason you see it. She's not actually being herself because she is trying to be the image of you. She wanted him, and she got him, and she didn't want to tell you probably because she didn't want to hurt your feelings. Yes, that is respectable but the majority of a friendship is based upon honesty. Your friend either didn't ask you how you feel because:
A) she doesn't care= does she normally do things like this
b) she's just a too caring person that didn't want you to get hurt.
Let me give you a bit of seperate advice. A friend that " found out that I like him, and she's being stirring rumours that arent true" is not a real friend. And a friend that "trying to be his perfect image is me" shows that she needs help on identity issues . Hope I was some help
Could someone please help me? I know it's been long since the last time I'v seen this guy i like so much and I ought to forget this guy. There's no day that I can't think even once about him and the reason why it's because memories will just suddenly crash through after thinking of something that is related but i didn't intentionally think about him. I don't like anymore to think about him even once. I'm tired of hoping and hoping that one day I'll see him but there's nothing left for me to hope. Please tell me ways on how to forget someone. Those that won't cost much. And also another problem of mine is I don't want to date others. It's just him or no one. It's just different if it's him.
You're putting too much energy into forgeting him that you're running away from how you truly feel about him . You're in denial about your feelings and until you admit how you truly feel about him, you won't move on and forget him . Even after you admit that you have some sort of feelings toward this guy, it will take actual time to deal with this. Time. I know you hate that word and you've probably heard it about a hundred times, but it really does . Once you admit to it , then you'll be able to move on . These things take time .