Well, I'm a second year college student. I have had my share of embarrassing moments, troubling times and I'm not the girl who got all the guys--so at least you'll know my advice is sincere and relatable, not perfect in an imaginary world. Any questions whatsoever are welcome, I'll try my best to answer accordingly.
Gender: Female
Location: Miami
Occupation: Student
Member Since: August 4, 2006
Answers: 334
Last Update: February 14, 2008
Visitors: 19206
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Brandi_S
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Okay- I'm 13/f-
I have this friend who moved away a year ago- at first she called me to talk to me but know she calls and has her friends talk on the phone and she know I don't like talking to people I don't know and haven't met face to face I tried telling her to stop but she woulnd't listen and last time she called she put her boyfriend on the phone and he said "hey babe wanna see my (you know what except he said it out right)" So I hung up- I hate that- I don't mind hearing my guy friends talking abbout that but they never say it to me- do you think I should talk to he anymore? I was going to tell her"I don't want to talk to your friends if YOU call so, if that's why your calling don't bother calling again"and hang up but I don't know now what do you think- my mom hhas said she would tell her I was busy If I wanted her to but I didn't say anything
TY in advance
Jeni (link)
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I don't think you should hang up on people, because it is very rude. But, do let her know that you don't want to talk to people you don't know, especially if they are going to be perverted. Ask her to only call you when she will give you her undivided attention because you will never get comfortable talking to a complete stranger. Hopefully, she'll listen to you, if she doesn't then try to limit how many times you actually speak to her.
-teacup.
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ive been goin out w/ my gf for about 6 months now. but yesturday i heard from 3 people that she liked this other guy from her church but she wont admit it can someone give me a good way to make her confess that she does like someone else (link)
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Well, how valid are your three sources? If not, it'll be mighty silly going around accusing her of something that is not true.
Tell her you heard that she has a crush on someone else, and that you feel she owes it to you to tell you something like this.
If she doesn't admitt it, then it's up to you to decide whether or not she is lying or not.
Good Luck.
-Teacup
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For sometime Ive been getting mad over tiny things. Like, someone will say something a little insesnitive without thinking and I get upset for hours. Even when they apologise I can't just, like, let it go. Then I get angry over the slightest thing.
How can I control my temper and stop myself from getting blue over everything? Its started to cause BIG problems with my friends and family. (link)
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If not for the sake of your friends and your family, try to remain calm for your health. It's unhealthy to be mad all the time. All I can advise is, take things in stride. If someone says something that bothers you slightly, just try to let it go. I'm not saying to be a push over about it, but let it go. If you do feel the need to say something, do so politely (i.e. I disagree with you because...). Just don't explode on them. You can learn to control it.
Much Luck.
-teacup
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does anyone no some remidies to relieve the pain of a period, she has pretty severe ones, she is 13 if that helps. so yea, if anyone knows some home remidies to relieve some pain and make her feel a bit better plz tell me. much apreciated (link)
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chamomille tea...it helps
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I want just wondering what everyone notices first in both the opposite and same sex. I want to know what to spend more time on so people will notice me. I don't want to say if I'm male or female because I want to know what both sides think. Thanks. (link)
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In guys, I notice if they are happy..which I always find attractive because they seem fun. I also notice what they wear.
In other girls, I notice shoes (I am a shoe whore), and hair (gives me an idea of other cute hair styles I may want to try out).
But hey, it's different for everyone else. I just think if you seem happy and confident with yourself, other people will notice because you will seem approachable and someone they can have a good time with. If you are shy and look down when you look, it looks like you would rather be left alone.
Hope this helps.
-Teacup
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I have been rude, mean, and bitchy to guys and to my family. Also, online, I have been kind of slutty to guys. I want to change, I want to be nice and kind and not slutty. How can I do it, I try but I'm so used to being rude and slutty and stuff. Please help! (link)
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I'm glad you want to change for the better, change is a great thing. I have had times when I have been mean and then sometimes it's hard to take back. If you could apologize to people you have been mean to, it would mean the beginning of you doing something nice which makes it closer to your goal. When you wake up and look yourself in the mirror tell yourself..."Today, I am going to be the kind of person I want to be". Yes, I know a little cheesy, but if you do this on a daily basis, you are constantly reminding yourself of who you want to be. Think of your actions and how they make others feel, it should help you want to be a better person.
Good Luck!
-Teacup
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OK here it goes I went out with this guy Ben and he broke up with me.. and then 2 months passed and we decided to give it another try unfornately it didn't work out so i broke up with him. the thing is, is i have a thing for his brother jay and i know he has a thing for me because he told me after the first time ben broke up with me. i still have a thing for jay, but i don't know what to do. ben is currently not talking to me. he won't give me the time of day... he is upset and acting childish so i don't wanna deal with him. what should i do? (link)
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If you have tried your best to talk to Ben and he snubs you, you have done your best. There's no reason for you to suck up to anyone...it just didn't work out...it's not your fault.
As for Jay, he needs to talk to his brother and let him know that you two have feelings for one another. If you really like the guy and he likes you too...you deserve a shot at happiness. I say go for it. Ben may be more mad, but he'll get over it one day. Wounds heal.
Much Luck.
-Teacup
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OKay well...see me and my friend lianne used to be BEST FRIENDS but then we got in this fight but we made up and after that she has never talked to me i mean like we say HI and everything but she never talks to me i am always the one who has to talk to her and now shes got this new best friend who she keeps hanging out with and i told her how i was feeling but she still didnt do anything about it what should i do????? (link)
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Let he know you miss the way your friendship was before. If she doesn't want it to improve, then there's not much you can do. Give her space and who knows maybe with time you'll end up being best friends once again. Meanwhile, just keep being you and meet different kinds of people as well.
-Teacup
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To my family, what I know is either never taken seriously, or they just dont listen to me, then realize im correct and dont give me any credit, or change the subject when i say "thats exactly what i just said" or something like that. to SOME of my friends, they use me for multiple things, and boss me around. its like to my family I have a say nobody everyone overlooks, and to some of my friends I dont even have a say. please help me (link)
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If you are the baby of your family, it may be the reason why your ideas are being overlooked and not taken seriously. Tell your family that you are not a baby and that sometimes you too have good ideas, and that you can be of some help whether they want to believe it or not.
Do not let your friends boss you around. I have had friends who were extremely bossy...and I have told them that they have no right to boss me around, my own mother who can boss me around doesn't do it, so I don't see why you should. Just let your friends know, that you're not a pushover and by bossing you around, they are disrespecting you and they should treat you with the same respect you treat them.
I hope you are taken more seriously.
-Teacup
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i have a problem. during the first meeting of my photography club,my friends and i sat at the second row and liked it.during the second meeting,there are these girls who were at the third row who asked us to move forward to the first row so that their friends could sit at the seconnd row.we moved because we only thought it would be temporary arrangement.but i was wrong.the next meeting,my friends and i sat on the second row for dibs.but those girls came back and asked us once again to move forward.but my friends and i are really uncomfortable in front.but we moved anyway and i saw my friends were annoyed.i wanna do something--but what? and how can i stand up to them without saying something mean? or should i just let them push-over us for nth times???
please help...thanks in advance
♥c0urTneY (link)
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Just let them know that you don't really like sitting in the front row, because otherwise you would move, but you are not going to because you got there first. That may mean that next time they will try to get there before you to take your seats, but it's ok...they're just seats. But as long as you get there first, you shouldn't have to move for anyone else. Just don't give them attitude, and they should be cool too. If they're not...oh well they are not going to carry you out of the seats.
Good Luck.
-Teacup
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I feel like i have lost my self respect and my rights of my own body. Last night, i had a really bad experience, me and my 2 best friends got drunk. One of my friends was sober, and me and my other friend were very drunk. Late last night, me and the drunk friend decided to go outside, and when we passed by the bus stop, 2 men told pulled us to a field and they started doing things to us, no one was around to help us or to get them away from us. After about 20 minutes, my sober friend who was inside and not looking after us, came running outside to find the 2 men and me and my friend in the field. She yelled at the men, called me and my friend sluts and stuff, and then the men ran away. I dont know how to gain some self confidence back, i am hurt and tromautized by those men who took advatage of me and my best friend. I need something to make me feel better, but i don't trust anyone to tell them what happened. Even my sober friend does not know what they did to us. Advice please! (link)
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Even though you were intoxicated, the men taking advantage of you is not your fault. What you need is closure...and that just may mean pressing charges on those jerks and maybe even telling your sober friend what happened. The other thing I can say is...if you are going to be drinking, make sure you won't get into trouble or get hurt. Be careful. Learn from your mistakes and know that what happened that night does not make you a slut, you were just not thinking and it is something you should avoid doing again.
I hope this helps even remotely. Good Luck.
-Teacup
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my brother and i are both realli depressed. i was wondering if there is anything i can do about us being depressed before something happens. if you get my drift. i fear for both of us. he's 17...almost 18 and im 15. if that helps. (link)
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The best thing to do is to a consult a doctor. They will know what to do, whether it means going to a therapist twice a week or taking some sort of medicine. Get help, and the sooner the better.
I sincerely hope it all works out.
-Teacup
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i have this friend and we are really close shes one of my bestfriends and i have a feeling that she might be racist against caucasian people because like all of her friends are black and she like only has one caucasian friend and everything to her has to be black and it really bothers me im colored myself and i have friends of all different racis and when someonelse is another race or color i dont notice it until she brings up the color or race that they are and it really buggs me because it kinda insults me because i am a little bit caucasian and my family is mixed of different colors and i asked my friend if she was racist and she said no and got mad that i asked that and she also doesnt like black and white couples she thinks theres something wrong with that but honestly i dont see anything wrong with it and i really dont know what else to do she says she's not but i think that she might be a little bit racist but not a whole lot so what should i do because i dont wont to have a friend like that and i also dont want to stop being friends wit her
(link)
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Tell your friend you are sorry for offending her by asking if she was racist, but ask her...why doesn't she have many friends outside her own race and why her views on relationships are black or white? Remind her, that you yourself have many different components to your race and she found you cool, so that just means there's so many other people that she will like..regardless of their race.
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Okay, theres this guy, and he's like...really annoying. Normally i'm not a mean person, hurting other peoples feelings, really makes me feel sick. But this guy....oooo, its like, first, he's constantly hitting on my friend, and then when he finds out that she's not interested, he starts talking to me. And i dont think its as more of a friend talking to kinda thing, but it gets really iretating. I just dont really like talking to him, he makes me just mad. He gets really angry really easily, and then like, refuses to IM me. of course, that just makes me happy, but he doesn't know that.
well, heres the problem, since we have diffrent classes i dont normally have to see him at school, but next year he's also going to be attending my other school, (i go to two schools each day), and i'm going to have to deal with him...EVERYDAY! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! HELP, I DONT KNOW HOW TO PUT UP WITH HIM!
Sorry its so long
Much love,
Meeee (link)
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I'm not sure how you can get him to stop being annoying and it'll be hard to just duck and hide from him every time you see him, so all I can say is you have to learn to deal with it. I remember in my freshmen year, I met this incredibly annoying boy and even 4 years later, he still irks me some...but he's not as bad. I got to know him better and he can actually be pretty cool. Just take a couple of deep breaths and suck it up. Unfortunately, in this world we are sometimes going to have to work and see people who we cannot stand but the beauty of it is...it makes us stronger people. Just try being nice to him and talk to him on a normal level, and he may surprise you and actually be tolerable.
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i really wanna go on the pill, so without my mom knowing about me wanting to have sex what are some excuses to go on it besides pregnancy? we've considered me going on it before because i've always had severe menstrual cramps but i think she thinks i'm too young (i'm 16) ? i always hinted towards it but i don't think she gets it so what are some things i can use as an excuse to get on the pill? thank youuu (link)
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The only thing I can think of is an irregular period. But, you say that probably won't work. Other than that, all you can do is go to a clinic and ask to get the pill there, and they won't tell your mom.
-Teacup
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17/f
Okay, I'm friends with this guy, and for the past few days we've been talking about dating. He's been telling me a lot of stuff convinicing me he wants to be with me or whatever. Well, I'm best friends with his niece. They're only a few years apart in age, & he's four years older than me, so don't freak out lol. Anyways, we've kissed & made out & he was supposed to take me to a movie last night. Well, he got back from work and said something came up, so I asked him what and he said he'd tell me later. I found out from someone else that he spent the night in a couples hotel with his girlfriend. He didn't tell me he had a girlfriend, so now I feel stupid. I don't really know what to say to him about it. Any ideas? =/ (link)
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If he really does have a girlfriend and he's trying to get with you, then you shouldn't have anything to tell him. Why bother? It seems like he is trying to make you the other woman.
I guess all you can do is find out if they are serious and why he would be leading you on if he does have a girlfriend. Make sure your source is reliable before you do accuse him of this.
Good Luck.
-Teacup
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Do guys mind if girls ask them out? Usually, it is the guy who asks the girl so I'm just wondering if it is okay for "her" to ask "him". (link)
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It is completely alright to ask out a guy. Actually, a lot of guys like girls who take initiative. Kudos to you, because I know I suck at the asking the guy out thing.
Hope it works well girl.
-Teacup
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Okay, i have this friend [lets call her annie]. Annie and I are really really close!!! Well she has this boyfriend [lets call him paul] Well, Paul and I went out last year for a little. I broke up with him because I just didnt see a relationship in it. Well, now since they are going out...
I guess Paul like..hates me. He said I was mean to him and he said that im annoying and stuff. annie and paul have been going strong for about 9 months. I don't know why it is that hes so mean to me! Its really annoying. he is such a jerk! What should I do?!?! (link)
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When you and Paul were dating, he must have really liked you because it seems like he still feel hurts. I would just talk to him and tell him that he's dating a great girl who just happens to be a very good friend of yours and that you want to get along with him because she's an important person in your life. If he doesn't act nice after that...then he's a bit of a jerk, and you should try to hang out with your friend when you know you won't have to deal with Paul.
-Teacup
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I been dancing for about 7 or 8 years. But im scared to try out for dance company, because the fact not making it, it kills me! Should i try out? Or should i not try out so it doesnt hurt mee (link)
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If you don't try out, you will spend the rest of your life wondering "what if?". If you try out and still don't make it...at least you know you were brave for putting yourself on the line.
Try out, if you don't...you'll regret it!
Luck!
-Teacup
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i tryed out for company at my studio which is a BIG deal!! and i didnt make it. i am okay with that but my problem is that all my friends made it. thats mean i wont be in any of there classes and i wont get to really see them(most go to differnet schools and/or are in differnet grades.) and next year for dance i am afraid that i will be put in a class with people i dont know or with people that are younger than me. and that would be really weird. also want if i get put into a class and that class doesnt get picked for opening and finale(another big deal.) so really im wondering wat the chances are of this and if i should be more woried than i am right now. and also if i should disscuse this with my teachers?(dance teachers that is.) thanks anyways. (link)
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The only thing I think you shoudl tell your teachers (if you are serious about dance that is), that you will give maximum effort and that getting picked for opening and finale is a big deal for you.
As for being put in a class with younger people and strangers, it won't be that bad. Meeting new people is always a good thing and I understand the embarrassment of being with younger kids (I had acting class with younger kids) but you'll be amazed at the talents of these kids and if you are the star of the class, you can also be someone they look up to, which hey, is not that bad.
Good Luck and dance your little heart out.
-Teacup
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