I am a real live adult who couldn't care less about ratings. If you want intelligent advice or an educated opinion, I'm here.
Gender: Female
Occupation: Microbiologist
Age: 24
Member Since: May 3, 2006
Answers: 670
Last Update: September 8, 2006
Visitors: 29050
|
| |
My ex girlfriend and I, of about 2 years, broke up back in Feb. It ended because I cheated and she didn't talk to me for like 3 months after it happened.
We've finally started talking towards the end of May. I know she doesn't want to get back together with me so I at least want to be friends.
So, now, when we hang out everything will be going fine until something reminds her of our break up and what I did to her. She then picks a fight with me and tries to get me to argue back with her.
How can I get her over this phase so we can actually hang out without her freaking out on me? Please don't tell me to give her time. I already gave her 3 months. 18/m
(link)
| |
Three months is nothing for a long and rather serious relationship that ended in a hurtful way. Yes, she obviously needs much more time. I would like to point out that as you get older, you realize that it is hard to be real friends with someone who you dated seriously (sometimes even casually). Most adults don't try to persue friendships after a break-up, especially one that ended in a hurtful manner. There are just too many complicated feelings involved that take a very long time to heal, and sometimes never go away. I would have to ask why you two are so hell bent on being friends if you really aren't interested in each other anymore. I think the best thing to do is to go your separate ways. It may not seem like what you want to do, but you'll be more inclined to this point of view as you get older. Often times, it really is the best thing.
|
|
yesterday a guy friend i have said i look like im Swedish. i don't know what swedish people look like so i dont know if that's a compliment or not? i'm really italian not swedish. so what features to polish people have? and when he said i look like im swedish is that a good thing or is it bad? are swedish people ugly and what features do they have for example like blue eyes? HELP. (link)
| |
The Polish ethnicity (classically anyway) isn't really an obvious one. Just typical European white with brown (or light) hair and some people have larger sized noses. I don't know why anyone would automatically think "Polish" when they look at anyone, since it isn't dramatically different from most non-latin Europeans. Maybe they were just asserting that you don't really look Italian, because Italian people typically DO have a very distinct look and maybe you don't share that? Who knows, I doubt they were trying to say that you were ugly or anything.
|
|
im almost 16. ITS LONG BUT PLEASE READ IT I NEED HELP! alrighty well me and this girl had NEVER really liked each other. but then this year we became BEST FRIENDS. well she did some really slutty things and talked behind my back and was just very dramatic and i hate drama. so right now shes like trying to appologize to me and stuff. the only thing is i dont want her as a friend AND I LIKE HER EX BOYFRIEND. which she says shes still madly "in love" with. but shes going to a different school next year. and i want to be able to date whoever i want. and she told him he "CANT" talk to her friends anymore. shes like crazy. so is this guys off limits? cause im not firends with her and i want a new start and i feel like this relationship would be good 4 me....sry this was so long. (link)
| |
He is fair game as long as your aren't friends with her. I mean for real, you don't talk to her or anything.
|
Hi,I´m Jackie. I´m 39 years old woman, and Í´ve been training at the gym for several years, 4 or 5 times a week. I have very very strong and big cuadriceps. The rest of my body is really ok, low fat percentage and all. I shouldn´t loose weight because my face would become very angular and my legs would remain almost the same (I already tried this)
I tried aerobics classes, weight lifting with aerobic interval pauses: I got no results.
Shoud I run more, do aerobics all the time?
Several persons told me is in my genes and I can´t change it. I really hate it, I can´t buy a pair of jeans, cause if they fit my legs they are huge in my hips and waist (link)
| |
You should hold off on the weights and just focus on aerobics to avoid continuing to overdevelop your quadriceps. Most of it IS genes, but weight lifting increases muscle volume, so I would cut back on that.
|
I have these two friends and they both lie at times. To me at times...and well one day they were asking weight. And I said I'm 160 and she said 120. now she's pretty fat and she can't in no way be 120. I was really stunned at her effort to lie. I don't want to confront her but she makes me feel like i can't trust her again.
What do I do? help me please cause it relly hurts me she lied. (link)
| |
I'm sure she was embarrassed of her weight and didn't want to admitt the truth. Next time you know she is lying, call her out on it. I figure she'll just keep lying to you about random stuff until she realizes that you are intelligent enough to not believe her.
|
I`m 15/f and im inlove with a 19 year old. It`s not that much of a difference but some people think it is. My parents wont let me see him because of his criminal record / past with drugs. What should I do? How can i find ways to be able to see him?
Ive never felt so special in my life and im so happy when im with him. sometimes when im in the car with my parents I start crying cause they dont understand how much i love him and they dont care.
how can i sneak around and find ways to see him please help me! (link)
| |
I think he is a tad older but that isn't really my issue, although I can see how that alone would freak your parents. He has a criminal past and a history of drug use? Of course your parents don't want you to be dating him! I think it would be wise for you to reconsider getting involved with him, but of course you probably won't see that problem because you are so in love, and focusing on the good. How to sneak around? I wouldn't, your parents aren't dumb- I promise. They'll be on the lookout for such behavior. If they catch you they could have this guy arrested techically, so if I were you I would lay low.
|
ok so here is a conversation i had with this guy that i like and i can't figure what exactly he meant in his last text message so i'm gonna type the whole conversation and i want you to tell me wat you think he means. I'll rate 5's to everyone that gives me an opinion. O and my name is *Debbie* and his is *Nathan* And this conversation was at 11:30 last night.
Nathan---how about we give what we both want a chance and see how good we really are together. hit me back adn let me know what you think you might like.
Debbie---in shock didn't reply for a minute
Nathan---are you going to text back anytime soon i would really like to know what you think before i go to sleep, i guess i could just call you.
Debbie---Well depends on what you really want.
Nathan---You know what i really want what is it you want.
Debbie---No i don't think i know what you want.
Nathan---I want you and you do know that what do you want, I wouldn't mind there being an US but that would be up to you. but what do YOU want.????
Debbie---(i sent this one to the wrong place)I want there to be an us to.
Nathan---are you there can i get a response please, just leaving me hangin ain't cool you know. I will call you in the morning but i want you to text me.
Debbie---I sent it to your phone instead of your screenname but i want to be with you.
ok this is where i get confused.
Nathan---i never got it but *that's good* i'll call you later ok.
Are we dating? What does *that's good* mean?
Thanks signed
really confused (link)
| |
"Thats good" meant he is pleased that you said you want to be with him. "I never got it" meant he never got the text that you sent to his phone. I don't think it's really confusing. Are you dating? How don't know how you define dating. I define it as going out on dates. I can say that you guys definitely like each other.
|
Hey, I let my baseball glove sit around for about 3 years. Now it has mold on it. It was a really exspensive glove, so I don't want to throw it away, but I do not know how to get the mold off of it. PLASE!!! How can I get the mold off the glove without destroying the glove, and dont give me ne sarcastic answers
thanks
14/m (link)
| |
I'm a microbiologist, so believe me when I tell you that to get rid of it you need to use bleach or alcohol. This may discolor the glove, but anything else won't get rid of the mold spores. Not only are they ugly, but they can cause illness as well. I really think you should get a new glove personally.
|
I seriously want to lose weight. There's just a couple of problems, though. I only need to lose 10-15 pounds. I am anorexic..sort of. I go two or three days without eating and then I start again. That doesn't work a lot because my parents always force me to eat or I can't go out or something. I really want to lose weight and get on a diet, but with me it's kind of "eat" or "don't eat", not "eat only this". And everyone thinks I'm already skinny, but my thighs and stomach aren't. =/
If I diet, I would like to be on weightwatchers, but I don't know how many points I need to limit myself to in order to lose weight quickly. Also, my parents don't want me dieting.
How many points should I allow myself for weightwatchers? How do I diet without anyone (and I mean anyone) else knowing? (link)
| |
You can't properly do weightwatchers without actually joining and going to the meetings. Otherwise, you won't understand the points system and how many is best for you. You aren't really anorexic, but you do have food issues that you need to deal with. I don't know if you actually ought to loose the weight or not, but let me tell you: as long as you are skipping meals and such you never will. Your body "knows" that you are going to do that (since you have been) and is hoarding the food that you DO eat as fat, since it isn't sure when it's next meal will be. Eat everyday, serveral times a day. Small, lowfat meal are fine, with lots of fruit and vegetables. You might think you are eating more, but the weight will come off because your body will be working more normally. Then, increase you exercise to help shave off the pounds.
|
hey guys!well im really self consious about myself down there. You know the vagina area. Well first because my inner lips come out further then my outer lips. I mean i have a boyfriend and hes never really felt alot down there but hes touched me down there and weve had sex and he never said anything but i mean im not sure if alot of other people have it. People told me it was normal but i mean all my other best friends have it differently like they have a camel toe one(which i think is so much prettier!!!). Im so self consious im even thinking about surgery later on in life i feel like my life sucks now. Man please guys help me out on this. Is it normal? Does anyone else have it and do they still have sex? or get fingered? or eaten out?
help me gurls!!! (link)
| |
Girl, you need to calm down. It is totally normal and there is no reason for anyone to be concerned with how "pretty" they are down there. Guys are just concerned with getting to oppotunity to get to that area, and do not conpare and scrutinize details of how you look. You need to relax and enjoy yourself, and also learn to love yourself. You are beautiful and it is crazy to focus on how things look in that area, and whether they are "good enough". You might as well be stressing over how attractive your pinky toe is.
|
|
So i was dating this guy and we were getting pretty serious and I was completley head over heels in love with him, and he claimed he was too. EVerything was perfect. Than out of no where tonight he dumps me because he wants to date around and doesn't want to be in a relationship. What do i do?? Is he lying? i Need advice ahhhh (link)
| |
I don't think he is lying, in fact I can't imagine how he could have made this more clear and straightforward. I actually respect his honesty because most guy typically try to sugarcoat things when they break up with a girl. I am really sorry that it hurts you, since you had high hopes for the relationship, it's really tough to go through this stuff. It doesn't seem like it was you though, he just isn't into it.
|
At school today, we were discussing the French Revolution in History class. The teacher was talking about how back then 97 % of French people were Catholic and they stuck firmly to tradition. We then started contrasting that to these times.
Then out of the blue he asked how many people believed in a Christian God. Not one person put their hand up. I didn't at first because I was embarassed, but then I did. I was the only one.
Later I was thinking.. I'm not sure it was right for my teacher to ask this. Is there any sets of rules on this type of thing? Like are teachers not meant to discuss issues like religion, politics, etc? I'm usually pretty closed-up about this kind of thing.
It really bothers me when I think about it, because I don't see why it was necessary. I graduate high school in a few months and was thinking of saying something to him at the end of the year. So, can someone let me know their opinion on this? Was it wrong for him to ask this?
Thanks.
(link)
| |
You're teacher was not out of line in asking this. I wonder about the lack of confidence that your class seems to have about their religion though ( I say this because statically speaking, a majority of your classmates are probably being raised in a christian oriented environment). If teachers never discussed relgion or politics, most people would never learn about anything other then what then learned at home- which is usually just one point of view. It is vital that political issues and views be discussed in class, since it is so important to the future of the world we live in. As for religion, it is extremely important for tolerance and undestanding diversity, if for no other reason. Education about contoversy andd sensitive topics is the single most effective way to prevent sterotypes, which lead to fear and even violence in some cases. I only which that the public school system offer more comprehensive classes on these topics alone.
|
|
k, I spent a good chunk of last month at the multinational training center doing gunnery and other army activities. it mostly involved firing the fifty cal machine gun, and vietnam-style wargames against live opposing forces. last weekend, I did this extremely hot lithuanian girl. here's the problem: I got a bigger rush and had a better time running around the german forest wildly firing at anything that moved than having my way with this girl. I'm thinking that's a little messed up. I don't really leave post much, spend a lot of time training, and don't really see many girls (the lunchladies are starting to look hot). is it just an environmental factor showing itself after eight months of nonstop hooah army stuff, or is this a more deep seated psychological issue? And no, I'm not gay. (link)
| |
It's a crazy environment and it is bound to affect you psychologically, but just because this girl doesn't do it for you doesn't mean you should be concerned at all that something is wrong. She just isn't your thing.
|
Could you bruise the pea-sized organ above the vagina? Because I think I did and hurts when I move. I am not sexually active or anything related to that.
I'll rate a 5 to anyone who tries. (link)
|
You mean the Clitoris?
You can bruise any area of the body. I am not sure how you would have, but it is possible. I ought to go away on it's own in a few days, if not then see a doctor.
|
|
I've been singing for about 7 years now, and I think it's time I started taking voice lessons. My mom insists that I have no natural talent. She's only heard me once, and at the time, I was so nervous that I didn't sound good. My mom said that if I had natural talent, then it would show up when I was a little kid. However, my choir teacher tells me I'm an incredible singer, and she's the type that never lies to make someone feel good. When I was a little kid, my chest voice wasn't so great and I didn't know how to use my head voice. I'm 13 right now, and a mezzo-soprano (though I have almost a three octave range). So do you have to be talented as a little kid to be a talented singer? (link)
| |
Wow, your mother is a real piece of work. Shouldn't she be encouraging you? Clearly you won't get any support from her so disregard her opinion and do what you feel is in your best interest.
|
Okay so im friends with these 3 gerls that are friends with this kid.and this kid "raped" my friend and i dont know if i really believe her only cause this kid is wicked nice and like i dont think that he can hurt anyone cuz he is soo sweet. I hung out with him last friday and i like him as a friend and i think he increadibly niice. and i dont knoe if i should keep hanging out with him or if i shouldnt.. i dont want to loose my friend cuz she will find out sooner or later that i hung out with him and then she'll be even more mad and i dont want to tell her that i hung out with him..What should i do..
Should i tell her or should i keep it a secret and should i be firends with him or not/? (link)
| |
Well, do you believe her or not? If not, then be friends with him and if she finds out, then tell her straight up that you don't take her accusations seriously. You might loose a friend but this is one of those situations where you have to choose.
|
for those of you who dont know, the mosquito ringtone is a ringtone that adults cannot hear. As people get older they arent able to hear high frequencies, which is what this is.
What i need to know is where i can download it for free...
any and all -good- answers get 5's
-J (link)
|
You seriously believe that? That is hilarious.
Yeah sure it is.
|
I asked a question earlier, on what the big deal girls had over celebrities and athletes with a six pack. I got great answers to that question, but then something else struck me when I read one of the answers I got:
- answered Monday June 12 2006, 10:51 pm:
***Oh and something you want to avoid: mentioning ANYTHING about a girl celebrity. Like "Man she is hot!" Because your girfriend will not be with you too much longer after you do that. ***
The part I put in stars struck me, but why though? It's very true, and a lot of my guy friends have told me stories about when their girlfriends got mad or upset with them for saying a celebrity was hot. I'm not asking for the rights to go around saying so, or that I want to either, but what I have noticed is that a lot of the girls do that too. I've heard about maybe every single celebrity out there from girls, even my girlfriend, but even when I mention one [which I've always tried not to] I get a bad reaction and they are offended, sometimes mad.
So should I say something to my girlfriend about that? I mean I see it as unfair, mostly because while I have tried to say something to her about the situation, I hear the: oh but I have you and thats what I really care about... but I try saying that too and its not acceptable. What do you think? Thanks. (link)
|
That is the silliest thing I have ever heard. Seriously, how insecure must you be (male or female) if it actually bothers you to hear about how your significant other finds a celebrity attractive? Of course they find them attractive! The reason they are celebrities is because they are some of the most attractive people in the world! That doesn't have a damn thing to do with how attractive the person finds you. I have never come across anyone with this attitude, and if I did I would find that kind of pettiness and insecurity a tremendous turn off.
Sorry, but clearly you seem to be part of the insecure group.
|
Okay, last night I attended a party at my friend's house (I'll call him "Bill"). Anyways, Bill is very upset because one of his roomates (I'll call her "Jill") recently turned him down after Bill asked her out...Bill also invited one of his best friends over last night. (I'll call him Dan) Later on in the evening, Dan and I were kinda' flirting and he told me something about how he liked to be touched in a certain area (I'm very sorry, I know that's very innapropriate, but trust me, it matters later)...and after a while, he went downstairs to Jill's room...he was gone for a very very long time, so I went down to check on them...but before I got completely downstairs, I heard Dan telling Jill the SAME thing about how he likes to be touched. I was kind of startled and unsure of what to do, so I left them alone for maybe 10 or 15 minnutes...and when I secretly checked on them again, I CLEARLY heard Jill softly moaning...I didn't tell Bill, because I wasn't sure if my suspicions were correct...
I finally went and checked on them again, (this time I heard them just laughing and talking) so I went down to say "hi". Dan clearly saw my distress and confronted me about it. I asked him if he had done anything with her, but he completely denied it and even swore on my life that nothing happened...he said he was just talking with her and then someone on the phone. I asked him about the "I like to be touched here" comment, and he said he tells that to a lot of people. As for the "moaning", he said they were joking around, but all *I* heard was moaning (and not over emphasized moaning like they were joking) and nothing else...I'm just not sure what to think...
And what's worse is that Jill had allready started a relationship with someone else.
I realize I probably shouldn't have been snooping, but I look out for Bill like he's my brother...I'm completely aware that it may be a terrible misunderstanding, but I need a couple opinions...what do you think?
Thank you,
That Gothic Chick (link)
|
1) You don't know anything for sure, no matter how suspicious you are
2)Jill has no loyalty to Bill, she can mess with whoever she chooses. As for her other relationship- that is her business
3)Dan- not the most stand-up guy but that is his business
4)Bill- he is a big boy and can take care of himself emotionally
Overall, I don't see how it is your place to do or say anything, unless your opinion is asked.
|
|
My best friend, Hillary, all the sudden likes Mike. They are now going out, Mike is a bad kid. No joke, he's only 12, [shes thirteen] and he's already had sex with another girl, cheated on 3 of his girlfriends, he smokes, drinks, and is on drugs. Hillary knows all this, but doesn't care. I can't pull her away from him, and even since they started going out, its like, shes trying to ignore me, ditch me, and just forget about me. I've tried calling her, IMing her, talking to her, but she won't listen, I don't want anything bad to happen to her, what should I do? x3 (link)
| |
She is essentially just a kid, so is he. You already see the problem and told he your concerns, and I assume that you'll be there for her ( like a true friend) to pick up the peices when it all goes down. Until that happy day comes, there is nothing you can do but let her make her own mistakes.
|
|