Just here to help
I don't sugar coat things, I am honest and truthful
Hi,
My name is "Lucy" Of course that isn't my real name.
I answer any questions that come to my in box, However if you don't receive an answer within 2 days more than likely your question has been rejected for a good reason.
I answer anything of the following only;
Relationships/Relationship Abuse/Cheating/Family Issues/Depression/Anxiety/Random Weirdos
NOTE: At times I am brutally honest this is not intended to offend anyone as I am here to give advice. I am straight to the point and I put a finger down on certain questions asked.
- Lucy
Age: 26 Member Since: September 17, 2009 Answers: 575 Last Update: July 24, 2010 Visitors: 32829
Main Categories: Love Life Families Random Weirdos View All
Favorite Columnists NinjaNeer WittyUsernameHere ThirdQED
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14 f
Ok, there was rumors going around that my bf kissed his friend. I was really worried over this and I talked to him about it and he said he never kissed her. He never lied to me before..we've been dating for 3 months now. I feel comfortable with my relationship with him..and I don't want to lose him. I just woke up and was worrying have to death again..so I got on face book and I asked his friend if it was true. Was that wrong of me? The only way I could no for sure would be asking her? I saw that she has a boy friend. My bf knows how worried I get..but I'm worried he will be upset by this...Should I delted the message to her? (link)
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It wasn't wrong of you to ask his friend, However bare in mind that anyone can say anything and sometimes the things you hear aren't always true. The important thing in a relationship is trusting one another and communicating. Even asking the girl who supposedly kissed your boyfriend still there is never a guarantee that you will get the truth even it were true. Chill out, By messaging her you are only going to stress yourself out. Here is something to keep in mind, Sometimes people get jealous and are willing to do anything and say anything to break a couple up. Do not message her not only will it cause a fight but she could end up lying only to tick you off. Just let it go, If your boyfriend were cheating then test him and not by asking him questions look for the signs of cheating...
Sudden change in subjects
Nervous
Doesn't seem to be as affectionate as he once was
Seems to be hiding things from you, Turns off cell phone or lets it go straight to voice mail
Only you know your boyfriend, However don't go jumping to accusations to whether your boyfriend is cheating or not. It will only make him think you don't trust him. The best thing to do for now is to chill out and do not message her.
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allllllright. so i answer a lot of questions about pregnancy on here, so i know how irritating these kinds are. but its just a question. if it bothers you, don't answer :) thats what i do, anyway.
the last time i had sex was two weeks ago. we used a condom at first, and then it was slipping because of the lube, so we took it off. he didn't finish, but he was close. and we did it for about ten-15 minutes without the condom on.
what is the percentage of a chance that i could be pregnant, even if he didnt come? (i dont know if he pre-came or not. he says he didnt, but i cant be too sure)
thanks. (link)
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Anything is possible, All it takes is one time. Could you be pregnant? It's possible.
Here is a tip: Never use lube with a lubricated condom, The chances of it slipping off are high.
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17/m
So I live alone with my mother, and I am more so an independent spirit.
The thing is my mother is
~nosy, she has to know every minute detail...if I go upstairs she always has to know why, etc...
~Stubborn, I try to help her, I try to advise her with what i know will help, but she is too stubborn to get help sometimes.
~Picky. Its like she chooses everything I wear and each decision I make, she told me to ask for a higher amount on my hourly wage than minimum, and that shot down my chance of getting that job.
I know they say mothers know more than teenagers think they do but at a point it just gets overbearing.
Its almost like we never talk, or whenever we do its naggy. I'm fed up and ready to say good riddance when I graduate Sr. year.
So what do I do?
(link)
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You are growing up, You are becoming more independent and that is hard for every parent to see. Have you tried to talk to your mother? Explain to her that you appreciate everything that she does but you would really like to start doing some things on your own.
Sometimes a parent doesn't always see or know when their child wants to be independent, Try to sit down with your mother and explain to her that you feel the need to take it to the next level. (Independent etc.) If the conversation goes well try to see if you two can discuss living arrangements, College etc. Communicating is the key, She is your mother and I'm sure she is expecting you to come to her.
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My friend was in rehab for a few months and I was not allowed to have any contact with her. So, in that tine frame, I kind of have a new best friend. I got really close to this one girl, and she's probably a better bestie then theo ther ever was. My old bff was secretive, a liar, and ha horrible mood swings. She had a lot of great qualities too, but I'm just worried if anything will be remotely the same. She was my best friend, but I've kind of moved on. I still will befriends with her but not really bffs.. I'm also one of her only friends. She has like two others besides me. How do I handle this? Should I stick with her even though I don't really want to? (link)
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What are the reasons to why you don't want to stick with her? Is it because you found a new best friend?
A person can have more than one friend, Although your friend who was in rehab has some bad qualities remember that nobody is perfect and even the new girl is not perfect either. Nobody is, You can remain friends with her but maybe cut back on how much you two talk and hang out with one another. A new friend doesn't mean you have to ignore the old friends, Just keep the contact to a minimal.
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This is super pathetic:
So I dated this guy for three weeks. We only really knew each other for like, a week and a half, but we started things really fast. Everything was going really well and i was super happy. But then randomly two weeks ago, he dumped me and i didn't really get an explanation as to why. It's been two weeks and im STILL stressing about it. I know we barely knew eachother (which is probably why it didnt work out), but its been a while and i still like him. He said we could be friends, but when i try to talk to him he totally blows me off. How can i stop stressing about him and move on? Thanks so much ♥. (link)
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Do you know anything about this guy?...As this could have a big reason to why he may be blowing you off.
The best thing to do is to except the fact that the relationship moved too fast and get over it, You two can remain friends but you will probably experience some awkwardness seeing the both of you don't know each other that well and I'm guessing by moving fast you had sex? Which knowing you two were sexually active will also probably cause awkwardness as well. The hardest part of a breakup is sometimes not knowing the reasons why someone broke up with you, but the moving on process starts when you learn to except the fact that things didn't work. In the future be more careful
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Can you bleed from a guy fingering you too roughly, even if his nails are cut? Are there other possible reasons for bleeding down there, after something like that? (link)
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Yes anything is possible, If you have sex to roughly it's possible to bleed due to something being ripped or torn and the same thing goes for fingering.
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k so heres the story and might be a little long ..
i'm 20 y.o. an engineering student with 2 years left before graduation. im in a relationship right now, with this great guy, unfotrunately its a long distance thing, although he comes all the way from his country to see me every 3 weeks at least. and stays for 4-7 days , i mean i can easily tell he cares about me and loves me, he's even thinking about moving to my country until i finish school and can move to his, i want to have sex with him but my family is very conservative...my mom is always telling me to wait til marriage but i do not want to do this, however im planning on being very responisble about it as i have been this past years of not having sex with people even if its physically right, cause i know they're not the ones id want to take this desicion with. so here's the important things...i cannot talk to my parents about this ..so this is not even a choice.. i want to be safe as i know what i want in life and surely a baby is not part of my plan.. how do one actually starts using the pill? does the effectiveness of the pill varies between brands? pregnancy is what concerns me the most...another thing if i could change one thing about my partners might be his past... i know he has been with a lot of girls, he told me this openly, didn't put a number to it , but he implied it , also he says that he regreats all this cause he thinks im too good for him , he has always been in relationships just cause of the physical part of it, but surely this is not the case with me and he says honestly its the frist time he really cares about the girl , he says the one in his country have no respect for themselves and stuff, so...should i care about this tooo much that he has been with lots of girls before? i mean i KNOW he cares about me and loves me , he woulnd't be spending too much money and time on me on crossing a whole ocean to come and see me, he lives in europe i live in latin america. and he certainly isn't rich. he says he doesn't want to loose me and he hasnt put any pressure on sex he knows it will be my frist time and that i need to decide this for myself....but i know i want to...and i know i wouldnt doubt this too much if it wasnt cause of the pregnancy scares and him being with lots of girls ....so give me ur opinion about this what would you do or do you think about this whole situation... (link)
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You have already made up your mind, If you want to go on birth control you need to schedule an appointment with your gynecologist. Birth control works differently on everyone, Different pills have different effects. There are also other options you could look into such as Depo Provera shot, Mirena IUD, Yaz to know which one is good for you again you should schedule an appointment with your doctor. Make sure this is what you really want to do, Use a condom and birth control properly is about as safe as you are going to get. One thing to keep in mind is this guy lives in another country, If things don't end up working out between the two of you are you going to have regrets? Many always remember their first time, Make sure he is right for you
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so i have a boyfriend. we're both 17. i can't figure out if he's using me for sex or not. he knows i'm a virgin and i didn't give up my virginity my ex who i was dating for like 14 months. we've done everything but actual intercourse. he always mentions it to me and i told him that i'm not going to do that with someone i've been dating for like amonth. he does text me everyday and sometimes he blows off his friends to hang out with me or he invites me to hang out with him and his friends. whenever we hang out we always end up doing sexual stuff like oral and stuff. i like him but i just don't know, i don't trust guys..
oh and we've only been dating like almost 2 months now. (link)
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1 month, 2 months, even 6 months is a little to short time for me to be thinking about having sex with someone. Tell him to respect your wishes and to wait a while.
The person below me is right, You don't inch your way into sex. Sex is something that should be enjoyable and it's a big thing that two people share between one another. As once you have sex, You remember it especially with the first person. (I lost my virginity 8 years ago and I am with a new partner and I STILL remember it) Instead of remembering it as being a wham bam type of thing make it something that you will have no regrets by waiting until the time is right. If your boyfriend can't respect your wishes to wait, Then you might have just answered your own question. Wait and don't let a guy pressure you into doing it when you aren't ready.
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That a person can determine that another person isn't a virgin by there hips?
(link)
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I don't know where you got that one from, but that is not true.
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I might be hired as a housekeeper for $9/hr to work in a few million dollar homes.
I'm wondering what exactly a housekeeper does though? (link)
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I used to work in a hotel as a house keeper, From my experience...
Dusting ( Tables, Lamps, Bed Post, TV's etc)
Cleaning bathrooms/ Washing mirrors, sinks, toilets, floors, bath tubs.
Changing beds (Pillow cases, sheets etc.)
Vacuuming
It can be a lot of work, Especially if you may be working in a bigger home. Good luck
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Omg...I let out a pretty big one WHILE we were intimate...to be really specific...he was right by it when it happened. Obviously after that happened, he laughed and so did I...but it did kind of mess up the mood and he just sat up and started watching tv. He randomly made fun of me throughout the day, but I just got really butthurt (no pun intended). I became really self conscious..thinking that I just ruined our sex life and that he will forever be turned off and I ruined his fantasy for me. I used to be so confident in the bedroom and this just TOTALLY messed it up for me. It feels like I'm making it a bigger deal than it is...but that's just the way I feel. Obviously, he got turned off because he didnt continue and kept making fun of me. Gawd...any feedback? (link)
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lol, I am so sorry..
Um,
I can promise you, You are not the only one this has ever happened too. (It's happened to me a few times too) The mood might have been ruined in the heat of the moment but I can promise you it is not something that is going to be forever. It is just one of those comedy things that happened sometimes. If it bothers you that your boyfriend is cracking on you, Let him know. Tell him you are really embarrassed by what happened and you feel hurt that he keeps making jokes about it. I promise you, This will all eventually blow over. ;)
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hi my name is ilse. and we'll for one i think my boyfriend of 1 year and some month's is getting bored. plus he want's kid's and i'm 17! and he's 19. and my home life really suck's! i can't take it no more! and i'm trying to loose weight but i wan't to loose it fast and i don't know how!? what's you'r advice? i'd really need one! (link)
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Wow..
First of all whatever you do, DON'T have kids at 17. Children are a hell lot more responsibility than just buying food, clothes and toys and having one because they are cute. Sit down with him and TALK to him, Give him a reality check and tell him you are ONLY 17! Babies need 24 hour care, Diapers, clothes, crib, car seat, formula and a bunch of other things. When a baby is sick it needs a doctor, If that baby doesn't have insurance it is the parents responsibility to pay off whatever fee there might be. The point, you both are not ready.
Home life does suck especially at your age, You are hitting the stage of where you want to become more independent and you are taking on more responsibility. You aren't the only one, but unless you can afford to live out on your own you are just going to have to stay mutual with your folks. As most apartments these days don't go for no less than 800, Most apartments come with heat and hot water but then you have the food, electricity, cable etc.
Loosing weight is all about mind control. Walking, jogging and running on good ways to loose weight. For a more motivational way to loose weight listen to music while you exercise.
If your boyfriend is getting bored of the relationship try to spice it up, Do more fun and new things together, Plan trips, Go for walks together
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hello i read your last answer about limewire not having viruses well im confused because when i asked a fry's technician they told me that 125% limewire gives viruses could that be true please help im stuck with a new computer and no musik thanks! (link)
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Yes it is true, All places that have illegal downloads are loaded with viruses. Remember, There is no such thing as completely free and if there is there is always a catch... Limewire = Free music along with free viruses!
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i am a 19 year old virgin 4rm south africa,i'm a christian.my mom an sis think havin a b.f is wrong an i think not,so i have a b.f who's 24 an we'v been datin 4 2mnths nw,i love him an he loves me,he even told me in 5yrs tym he wants 2 marry me.so my question is,wat do u think? (link)
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You are an adult and so is he, Therefore you are of age to make your own decisions. No, I don't think it is wrong and I DO think it is a great thing that you waited for sex. Most young people don't wait and they rush things. If he makes you happy, treats you right and respects you then no there is no problem.
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i was just wondering how you got your songs from limewire to go onto itunes because i have no clue how. and also how do you get songs from limewire to a cd? or do u have to import them to itunes also?
k? thnx
:] (link)
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Hi
I'm not sure how Itunes works but I do know that if you use windows media player, You would drag the songs from Limewire into the library. In order to burn a cd yes you would need to import all the songs onto a Cd first before they are burned.
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After every person I kiss or make out with, I usually get like a cold or something. Right now I have a moderate cough and I have a scratchy throat when I wake up in the morning and when I drink water. Could it be mono? Or something else? Or is my immune system just like that? (link)
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It could be mono, Go to the doctors and get checked out.
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I have to save up about 2700 until I graduate high school next year. This is going to cover the cost of school trips and multiple proms. I already have a job, but the money I earn is going to fall slightly short of this. What are some ways I can supplement my income? I cannot babysit, as I know no small children, nor do I want to watch other people's kids. (link)
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Dog Walking, Get another part time job, Do some work around someones yard or house.
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(19F)
Last night I stayed at my cousin's house with her and her boyfriend. I have been in a relationship for almost 4 years and just recently met another guy. This new guy is amazing. Well, last night he came over to where I was staying and we hung out. We ended up going to get some drinks and when we got back we fooled around in his truck. Later on, after my cousin and her boyfriend went to bed and we ended up having sex. He stayed with me almost all night and I thoroughly enjoyed what we did, but this morning when I woke up I was feeling regret.
I want to stay with my current boyfriend, should I tell him what happened or should I leave it alone and just move on?
Thank you (link)
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Tell him, What you did was wrong and he deserves to know the truth. You made a choice to how much you drank and you made a choice to go through with what you did. If it were the other way around you would probably want to be told too.
Actions come with consequences, You owe it too your boyfriend to tell him the truth.
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Can you get armpits waxed? And if so, how does it compare to shaving?
thanks. (link)
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Yes you can, I believe it last a little longer rather if you were to shave naturally but the pain is probably unbearable. Oww?!
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ok here's the thing im a 20 y.o female, ive been in some relationships but never had sex, that was basically my rule like anything but sex.. not because of religion issues, but more like as in i have the biggest fear of getting pregnant, im still a university student , couldn't deal with a baby right now ... im in a relationship right now with someone i care and love very very much, and i know i want to have sex with him, and i know id have birth control and condoms, but still i have this huge fear , but i really really want to do never been more sure about this. like is it really probably to get pregnant that way? or what is ur recomendation for this ? (link)
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I think it was very smart of you to wait until you were ready, Not many people really do these days. However about the pregnancy birth control and a condom is about as safe as you are going to get. Yes, Anything is possible but if you use a condom properly and take your birth control like you are supposed too then you should be fine. Remember, Only go through with it if you are truly ready.
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