Gender:
FemaleLocation:
NYOccupation:
Residential Associate/ College StudentAge:
21Member Since:
July 28, 2004Answers:
2046Last Update:
March 30, 2010Visitors:
105343Favorite Columnists
foxrider140
Main Categories:
Work/School Relationships
Friendship
Love Life
View All
about
advice
i like this kid, but he has a girlfriend.
and he's always flirting with me.
or staring at me [i don't understand why though].
its really annoying 'cause its like he's leading me on.
i want him to stop, but i still like talking to him.
how do i tell him?
can i just ignore and avoid him? 'cause that's what i've been doing.
but it doesn't work very well.
ok heres my viewpoint:
i would respect the other girl, because i have been on the end of that other girl and it sucks. if anythign, i would give the girl a heads up about whats going on. and maybe you can suggest to the other girl to lead him on (on purpose) and see what he says. because if he tells you he would cheat on this other girl with you, then she should leave him. i understand you like talking to him, but i would want a loyal bf. if hes going behind his gfs back, he migght do it to you too..just my opinion because i have been in the position of the other girl type thing
Here is my situation. Exactly 3 months ago my then boyfriend broke up with me due to confusion about a woman from his past. I began the "no contact" thing right away, deleting him from my cell to avoid drunk dialing or texting, put away pics...anything that reminded me. Even doing all of this, I am human and long to hear him say he made a huge mistake and wants me back. LOL
He does not bring her out or introduce her friends even though he knows that I know they got togther. He wont even confirm if they are together, happy...anything. He wont talk about her at all to his friends, seems to make him very uncomfortable.(BTW, I am not hanging out with them to avoid seeing them together)
So I recently had a death in my family an I found a hand deliverd card from him in my mailbox. As I I would with anyone else who offered condolences, I sent a one line email saying thank you. He replied and said to not be afraid to ask him for anything I might need. I replied with a one line witty reply(nothing suggestive,) not expecting an answer. Well, the next day he replied with a laugh and a witty reply. I guess my question is...is this just a genuine concern for my loss or is he trying to open the lines of commnication? I do not want to read more into it than it is as I do not want to be sent back to square one in the getting over him process. I dont really want to lose this opportunity for us to reconnect, but I dont want have my feelings hurt if he is just being nice. I have a gut feeling she might not be all he had dreamed of when she was unavailable now that he is actually dating her. If I was on the reading side of this question, I could answer it, but emotions cloud my judgement. I have not responded to his email and don't really know how to handle this. Advice from a man would be wonderful, but I would appreciate any advice.
alright, this is what i think. i think if you dont take this opportunity, you will regret it down the road. you will constantly think to yourself, "what could have happened if i kept talking to him?"
you dont have to spill your emotions to him, maybe play it cool and talk causual. see if he brings up getting back together and whatnot. to protect your feelings from getting hurt, dont jump to conclusions, dont ask straight out if he has feelings for you. just play it cool and talk like friends. see what happens and if you need more advice definitely inbox me.
I've been with my boyfriend since Oct. 23rd 05'.
I cheated on him when we were going out around this time of year last year. about 6x. btw: i'm 16 he's 18. He lives with me and we argue quite alot. I stopped having feelings for him about 4 weeks ago, Currently he has met a new friend named J, and j's a hottie. I want to meet new people, i don't know why. I don't know if this is a bad or good thing. My boyfriend has really bad anger problems and when i tell him i don't love him or like him; he doesn't take it seriously. I just don't know what to do, can anyone help me on this one? thanks x100.
i totally agree. if he wont get out on his own, call the police. they will get him off the property and make sure your safe in the process. its the only way
Me and my old boyfriend went through alot of tough situations. He had hit me before and was very controlling so I broke it off. I told him we could be just friends but now its to the point where I dont even want to talk to him. But everytime I see him, I cant get over him. I'm still in love with him but I know the relationship was hurting more than it helped. I can't even remember how to be single since I haven't been single for almost a year and a half. I always have the need to be in a relationship because I hate being alone. I'm not hanging out with him this weekend and I wanted to know what are some things to do to keep him off my mind/get over him. I'm 15/f. Thanks.
i was in the exacccct same situation as you. the hitting, the controllingness..i went through the same thing. the best thing to do is to spend time with family and friends. i used to never be home with my brothers..and just playing video games with them kept me happy. a night out with friends i never really got to see made me happy too. go out..go shopping, get a haircut, hit the gym, chill with friends or family. etc
okay my bf and I have been dating for not that long and when he makes out with me he dosen't use tougne!!!! I don't want to put my tonge in first!!! do I tell him but that be weird please help
hmm. you can maybe suggest playing a game where he takes a turn kissign you and you let him lead..then when its your turn, use the tongue. or lead up to it by gently sucking on his bottom lip..thats always hot :) if that doesnt work out then maybe try something else..ask him what he likes about your kissing..and what he wants to try along with it..then when its his turn sayy you want to try tongue. if thattt doesnt work out, maybe have a friend of both of yours can ask him if you two have made out and used tongue yet. then have your friend suggest using tongue. well i hope one of those suggestions helps..thanks for the inbox..defintely update me :)
Ok, well i am sorry in advance if this is long, or confusing, but my mind is really jumbled now, so stay with me. My girl friend and guy friend were over my house. I like the guy friend. Well at a party, as a joke, my friends were trying to give a different guy an erection (dont ask). Well i was trying to explain to my girl friend what we did. Well we had him sit and we straddled him and like grinded on him and like just did stupid stuff like that. Well, i was doing the stuff to my guy friend to explain. Well while i was doing it he got an erection. haha. well later, while my girl friend was playing the wii, he kept on holding my hips and putting his arm around me and whispering, "hey baby" in my ear. Well when i asked him about it the next day he was like idk and he pretended it never happened in school on monday. Was he giving me signs? should i tell him i like him? i want to but i feel like if i do, then it will be weird, because of the thing when i asked him about it. What should i do??? thanks
i think those are pretty strong signs. if you want to know for sure, maybe talk about it online. online talking seems to be better for persoanl stuff like this. if someone asked me flat out to my face, i might deny it. i seem to be more open online.
ok i need help asap! this guy that i really really really like well we've been talking for like forever now about doing stuff. and i already promised him i would. like promised for sure. but now i'm getting really nervous about it.. like i'm scared to death, but i really want to do stuff, stuff as in i'm going to give him a blow job and he's going to finger me. i've never done any of this so please help me! any tips on what to do?, how to make it not awkward?, and how to not be so nervous? thanks a ton!
alright, so this is just my opinion, but i would not do this at all. trust me, im 18 so ive had my share of situations and seeing my friends go through things like this. you shouldnt do sexual activities liek that if you arent going out..if you are comfortable about it and wont get emotions involved, then i guess there is no stopping you. but just stop to think about this for a second..hes a guy so hes horny, you might do this with him and he wont talk to you again, or he will move on to the next girl. i dont want to see you get hurt. if you are really going to go through with it, i can try and give you advice but i cant get graphic on here so you can IM me if you want on AIM. My sn is eatapasty
so im 20 my bf is 23 weve been together about 6 mos.. anyways i noticed that he left his xgf a picture comment on facebook saying ohh (name) lookin hot... they dated for like 4 mos. she was in love with him but he didnt feel the same way which is why he broke up with her. he always tells me he didnt really find her that attractive they just really got along and whatever. I know he isnt going to cheat on me. I cant bring it up to him because I only could see the comment while on his facebook because Im not friends with his xgf... I just dont think its right to leave comments on an exes page like that when you are in a relationship. I know if i tell him that just randomly he'll tell me he doesn't do that and etc. My question is if other people think its wrong too? and if I should just casually bring up the thing of telling his xgfs or any girls theyre hot or etc..?
well, i know how you feel trust me, but i would let this one slide. it could be a lot worse, at least he isnt saying this to every girl out there. you are confident he wont cheat on you, so i would let it go. if he starts getting weird, leaves her more comments, or seems like hes not interesting in you, then i would bring this up as an issue.
how do you really get to know a guy that you're interested in? what topics can you talk about so that after some time you really feel like you know them and they know you?
well, a good start is talking about each others past. about family,exes,friends,memories*good and bad memories* likes/dislikes. you will discover you will find out more about them as you hang out with them. getting to know someone doesnt happen overnight, if you guys talk and hang out a lot you will get to know him through natural conversations.
I'm 17 and my boyfriend is 18, we've been together a year and a half.
The other day when we were at the mall I saw this really pretty ring and told my boyfriend I really liked it. Later on he asked me what I wanted for christmas and I told him I wanted that ring.
Last night he called me and said, "Is there anything else I can get you other than that ring, because I don't really feel comfortable giving a ring to you" I was really surprised, he said he didn't think it was a good idea because "rings usually mean something else."
I honestly wasn't thinking it to be a "Promise ring" or anything like that, I just really thought it was pretty. Now I'm sort of hurt, not because he won't buy it for me,(and I know its not a money issue either) but because of what he said about not being comfortable giving it to me. I don't know why but it makes me doubt our relationship, and I'm upset about it. What should I do? Should I try to talk to him about it, or would that just make things worse?
maybe when you said you like the ring he was thinking you wanted him to propose to you. dont doubt your relationship over it. talk to him about this and explain you werent wanting him to propose to you, you just really liked it and it wouldnt mean anything morre than a beautiful gift or maybe a promise ring.
like im a black girl but i tend to like a lot of white people too.. usually guys with longish brown hair and blue eyes. is that weird? like i dunno.. I like black guys too but a lot of them are dicks, especially here in america. people say its okay to like.. like or date people of different colors.. but idk.. like what my parents would think of that since i've never talked to them about it.. and theres never been like biracial people in our family since they were born in africa and all their relatives lived there as well. we're the new generation that gets to live in the u.s. um.. so any thoughts? its not really a question or maybe it is but im kinda unsure.. like cause im not limited to only liking black guys and i like other guys too, especially since theres a lot more white guys at my school than black. and well other races too
you should go for who you like. your family might not accept it right away, but dont let that bring yuou down. there is nothing wrong with interracial couples. go for whoever treats you good and hopefully your parents will accept that.
Ive been bestfriends with this girl for two years. We do everything together including work together i see her all the time. Well when i first met her she told me she doesnt smoke or do any kinda drugs. And i believed her and throughout the past two years she has said it many many many times that she doesnt do drugs. She even dropped a friend because they were saying she was doing drugs. Well yesterday i was hanging out with a girl i just started working with she has hung out with my friend a couple times and she told me that my bestfriend smoke weed all the time. She has came into work high as the sky. And i could never tell. I even asked my bestfriends brother if it was true and he said yes she smokes with me all the time.
Im so pissed off how could a bestfriend lie about this i wouldn't in a million years judge her over that and she knows that. I can't say well ya know ___ told me that you smoked weed. I'm very hurt over this and i dont even want to look her in the face for lying to me. Is there anything you guys recommend me doing? thanks
i understand your anger, but i also understand what her reasoning probably is. your probably a great friend to her and she doesnt want to lose you just because she smokes weed. confront her about it and ensure her you will still be her best friend, but you need her to be honest about everything from now on
So my boyfriend and I have been fighting alot lately and it seems like we will be doing fine and then one night he'll say hes going out to the bars with his friends and ill suddenly feel upset. He doesn't understand that that bothers me but it does. I'm 19 and he is 23 and I hate that he can get into the bars and i cant. I dont understand why his friends cant have a party at their place that way i wont be left out :/ Am I overreacting? Is it silly that that bothers me? Because anytime I sound upset that hes going he'll say things like "so are you made that I want to go out with my friends? i havent been out with them in a month" and then Ill be like "well i dont care" when I really do! and "do what you want"
im going to be honest, i knew someone who would always give their gf a hard time about seeing her friends. he got mad at her all the time and it made her feel terrible! she just wanted to chill with her friends, she wasnt cheating or anything like that. you have to just let him see his friends. i mean it will probably only be a few times a month. you need to accept it and not fight about it. see your friends on the days he sees his. its actually healthy to have apart time and time with friends
would anyone consider smoking marijuana a drug problem. Not heavy smoking like everyday. but like maybe a few joints a month. they can go without using it for a a few weeks, so yeah, is it a drug problem? thanks a bunch y'all :D
everyone has a different lifestyle. im not against it..and if its a little bit here and there it seems fine, but obviously its a problem because its illegal. other than that, i would say its nto a problem because you dont smoke three times a day like some people i know of. if you wound up doing that or wanting to experiment with hardcore drugs like E or coke, then i would say its a problem
ok this dude likes me ALOT my friends tell me that he does but he's a gangster and im sorta preppy and stuff but i think i like him i do like him
but he is like really experince and im not like i have'nt had my 1st kiss and i mean he's made out and stuff
but i dont want him to be my 1st kiss but i like him again and im not allwoed to have a bf and i have'nt had on [well i did but they were'nt really real like we did'nt do anything]so yea and i dont like to dissapoint my parent bc my mom trustest me alot and i just cant look at my mom the same way again if i get a bf im really weird i guess
so can some one help me
CONFUSED
first of all its definitelty not weird to feel this way, its good that your respectful of your moms wishes. you could maybe mention the idea and how you like someone. maybe your mom and him can meet and who knwos she might love him. dont get freeaked out because he has some experience. you might get to know him and find out hes a really good guy, etc.
here's the issue. my name is cecelia and i have been with my husband for almost five years now, were going on our 2 year anniversary, we have two toddler sons. i love him alot with all my heart and soul but for the last past two years things have gotten bad. it's like when were good were good but when were bad were BAD. i've tried talking to him and half the time he dont want to talk and when he dose he only talks about his issues. every time i begin to say something he interrupts me and keeps talking about him. he dont want to listen to me. he says he love me but he treats me badly, like he talk to me badly sometimes and pushes me away. we've came to the point of breaking up but he wont leave the house. im not happy but i dont have the strength to leave him what should i do?
alright, marriage is a major thing, its the rest of your life forever type thing. (obviously) my point is, do you want to put up with this for your whole life? im sure you envisioned your husband and you being happy and in love always. but he wont even listen to you or let you talk. if he doesnt want to go to marriage counseling, then i think you should leave him. hopefully he will want to go because my parents were about to divorce after 20 yrs of marriage until they went to marriage counseling. if hes not willing to do anything, you only have two options.,be miserable forever or leave him. maybe if you two seperate or threten divorce, get lawyers involved, etc he will finally shape up. sometimes a boot in the behind is what the guy needs :) well on a serious note, i want you to be in a happy marriage, you shouldnt be miserable. so make the choice that will be best for you
i hooked up with my friends bf. yes it was stupid and i really regret it so dont tell me how bad it was. I feel terrible but i made a mistake. now everyone knows. what do i do. (we have the same freinds)
well, you messed up and the least you can do is tell your friend if she doesnt already know. be prepared for her to not talk to you for a long time or maybe not ever, but this is part of the consequence. apologize as well, but if my friend ever did that to me, i dont think i would talk to the person again. it was a terrible thing, you cant change the past..so just do what there is left to do. there is nothing left to do except apologize and tell her if she doesnt already know
14/f/freshman
and i'm like nervous ha. he's going to be meeting my stepdad and i don't know. i don't know what were gonna do, should i rent some movies? should i get them before or like have him come with me? ahh i know i sound like a dork, but everything i do turns into an awkward situation.. any ideas and advice would be awesome :D
thanks
i like the idea of having him help pick out some movies, maybe pull out your old photo albums and show him and maybe give a funny story that went along with it. it all depends on how you handle him coming over..if you are uptight , then chances are he will be too. give your bf a lil backround on what your stepdad likes so maybe youur bf can bring up a convo about it. good luck
has anyone been to a world fair? what exactly is it? no links
someone is lazy and cant google. pssh
Hi i have been talking to this guy for about a month now... Him and his gf got back together a week ago and i was really upset and i told him that and then they broke up again. well according to him they did anyways in a way i kinda think he is lien. but i really like him and im really confused because him and his girl have been together for almost 2 years. but hes always talking to me and stuff. Im suppose to hango ut wit him this weekend what do you think i should do. believe him that he isn't with her anymore or what?
19-f
well i would beleive him and probably leave him alone because two years is a long time..so if hes talking to you like that they probably have some stuff to work out and you should back off and not interfere