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making the connection
how do you really get to know a guy that you're interested in? what topics can you talk about so that after some time you really feel like you know them and they know you?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
well, a good start is talking about each others past. about family,exes,friends,memories*good and bad memories* likes/dislikes. you will discover you will find out more about them as you hang out with them. getting to know someone doesnt happen overnight, if you guys talk and hang out a lot you will get to know him through natural conversations.
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Here you go. =)
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I don't know how well you know this guy. I will assume you never spoke at all. First you have to start just saying hello to him. A smile and a hello goes a very long way. But you need to have a few conversation pieces. You'd probably be too uncomfortable to comment on his smile or anything. In that case, you want to comment on a possession of his most likely. For example: "I really like your necklace. What is the story behind it?" You don't want to just ask "Where did you get that necklace?" He'll say "the mall" and then the conversation is over. If you have a class with him maybe tell him how funny one of his jokes was and how he always cracks you up. Little things like this are nice but you aren't throwing yourself at him. It may help you both getting used to talk to one another. You want to take this to where you talk to each other when you see each other. If you don't know what to say to him, ask him questions. This will keep conversation going plus he has to think what to say while you can think of the next question. But ask questions to the answers he just gives you. Asking questions shows that you are interested in what he thinks or things about him. Just don't ask yes or no questions. You want to ask questions which force him to give longer answers. It really helps conversation. Now lets say you two begin talking routinely. You will want to take things up a notch. I'm assuming you are still in school. But maybe one day while talking say something like " this is too much to talk about at this moment, why don't you tell me over lunch?" You can also just be talking about maybe movies or some activity that you both like and use it to be closer. Like if you both say you want to see the same movie that is on dvd. You can say something like "I never saw it either, why don't you come over so we can both see it together." Girls normally don't ask guys out on official dates, but you can ask him out to hang out. That way he can be around you and maybe think of you in new ways. That's how I would suggest getting to know on another. But you did ask about topics to discuss. In the early stages keep things light. Topics like movies, sports, music, tv shows are generally safe ones and can help find common ground. But talking about family can be a good topic. It is if you find similar things in your own family relationship and show how you both have similarities. Like if he says his dad is a bad cook, you may say "mine is too,...this one time my dad made..." and tell your funny story. It will help you have a bond and shared experiences. Normally you want to stay away from topics like religion, politics, the death penalty, and abortion. People need to be pretty good friends before those things can be talked about. You have to respect the other person before you accept that they have a different opinion. So stay away from that. Normally though, it doesn't matter what you talk about. You just have to have a flowing conversation. Plus it's fun knowing you can talk about anything and not get stuck. So no yes or no questions. Say "what are your thoughts on football?" instead of "do you like football?" You should be fine. All you need to do is have the courage to talk. If you do that you can't go wrong. He may not ever feel like you want him to but you can get to know each other. I hope I was some help.
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