im 16/f, and for the last two years, i've had a serious urge to want to have sex with an older man. 30-39 years old, to be exact.
it might have something to do with my love for Breaking Benjamin's lead singer, Ben Burnley. He is 31. and he turns me on and is the subject of many of my wetdreams.
i have a boyfriend who is a few months younger than me, and i love him to death. i would never be unfaithful to him, and i would never have sex with anyone but him. but these wishful, lustful urges wont go away. and its getting so bad to where im about to throw myself at the nearest guy who looks over 20. i dont know whats wrong with me!
i sit here for hours watching BB performances and lust and drool over Ben and everytime my boyfriend and i have sex i keep wishing he was at least 20 years older!!
how do i make this stop? its interfering with my life and im afraid if i dont stop wanting this so much, something bad might happen...
can someone help? give me some answers?
It sounds like you've just gotten an obsession with Ben Burley, and therefore, older guys are reminding you of him. I think you could also be intrigued by what you don't know. Since your boyfriend his a few months younger than you, and you've most likely only dated guys around your age, you're interested in what older guys would be like.
What you need to see is that guys that are twice your age are not good when you're 16 years old. People could rattle on for days about all the reasons you shouldn't be with someone that is that much older than you at your age. Not only is it highly illegal, there are also a lot of emotional aspects to it that you wouldn't fully understand unless you were in the situation. Plus, 16 year olds and 30 year olds are at way different places in their lives. Sixteen year olds are still in high school. They're trying to figure out what they want to do career-wise and what they want their life to shape up like. By thirty-one, most people's lives have shaped up for the most part. Most people at that age have their career, family, and should be 100% independent.
I really don't think you should be too alarmed though. You're just really attracted to the lead singer of Breaking Benjamin. It's okay to be sexual attracted to people that are older than you. It's fairly common for teenagers. But, if those thoughts are getting to the point of obsession to where they're interfering with your daily life or you think you might act on them, it's time to put away the Breaking Benjamin performances for a while.
You don't want to cheat on your boyfriend or make a huge mistake just because you're caught up in lusting after someone right now. There's a big difference between being attracted to people that remind you of someone you like, and acting on those attractions.
You will be in a world of hurt if you do act on the lustful things you're feeling. If it's truly interfering with your daily life, you need to stop watching Breaking Benjamin videos for a little while. At least until your mind clears up. You need to be able to make the distinction and have self-control enough to not act on your hormonal thoughts.
Darby(:
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so i'm a theater nerd and right now i'm in a dance show with student taught pieces. so my choreagrapher just happens to be my ex's old best friend and right now they're just really close friends. me and my ex dated for 6 months and broke up 2 months ago. in my actual dance class my teacher was saying how great it is being with a metro sexual man. i shouted out "i call (name of my ex's best friend who is metro)!" my friend who is tight with him asked if i actually liked him because he told her he liked me. i started thinking about it and ended up liking him. now i'm crazy about him. but we haven't told each other how we feel we've only talked through friends. but he asked my ex for permission to get with me and my ex still isn't over me. now the guy is freaked and my ex who was my friend isn't speaking to me. what do i do? i'm still crazy about this guy!and i still want to be friends with my ex.
Facts are facts and I'm going to be honest. Right now, it's going to be really hard to date this guy and still be friends with your ex. The only possible way you could do this is to get your ex to talk to you. Either call him, text him, email him, or talk to him in person somewhere. Tell him that you need to talk to him, and hopefully he will respond to that.
When you do talk to him (it's better talking about in person), tell him that you're sorry that his feelings are hurt. Let him know that you never intended for this to happen, and that this crush just recently came about. If he's an extremely extremely understanding person, he might end up being okay with this. But, I'm sure you can understand why this is highly doubtful. How would you feel if one of your friends had a crush on one of your exes, and that ex had a crush on your friend too. It's like being double-stabbed in the back by two people you thought you could trust. But there is a slight chance that if you explain and let him know that you're sorry and that you understand how he feels, he could be okay with it.
If you choose to do this and he still is very hurt and doesn't want that to happen, you're going to have to understand that he's probably not going to be your friend for a while. At that point, you might as well date his ex because he's going to know that he's the only thing standing between you and his friend.
Your other choice is to talk to your ex and tell him that you're not going to date his friend. Tell him that you understand how he feels and that you would hate if he did that to you. Let him know that you want to stay friends with him and that you don't want to hurt his feelings by dating his friend.
This way, of course, means that you're not going to get to date his friend.
This is really a matter of what is more important to you. Your ex being your friend, or your ex's friend being your boyfriend?
Do what makes you happy. Even if your ex is extremely angry and hates both of you for now, he will eventually get over it. He may never trust either of you enough to be friends with you again though. That's just a risk you're going to have to date if you're going to date his friend.
Good luck,
Darby(:
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I'm recently separated from my husband of 4 years because he was controling, abusive and did alot of things behind my back that made me feel he didnt love me at all. I've always had this coworker that I take my breaks with. We have good conversations and similar interests and I did always like him, but would never do anything because I was commited to my husband. A couple weeks ago we started what I thought was a fling but its escalated and I'm feeling strongly about him. I can't imagine not having him around me and I yearn to feel him when we're apart. I'm not in love, but afraid I could be one day. The problem? He has a girlfriend albeit in another country but they are in a stable relationship and have been for quite some time. She doesn't know about me. And although I have cut my emotional ties to my husband, he's still just as loving with her. I dont expect him to leave her cause thats not an option but I am afraid I'm setting myself up to get hurt. I tell myself that everything we are doing is okay with me but I think I'm in denial. I dont want to get hurt but I dont want to not have him in my life. And what about when he goes home to visit her? Should I just grin and bear it?
I'm not saying that this is the problem, but I want to throw it out there anyway, just so you can think about it. Do you think you could be so attached to this guy now because he was somewhat of a support system when you were with your husband, and now that you and your husband are recently separated, you're needing even more support?
I'm not saying that you want your husband back at all. Truthfully, it sounds like you did the right thing by separating from him. But I think it's possible that you're so dependent on your co-worker because you need someone that cares about you right now. I'm sure you really do like your co-worker, but some of these feelings good be so strong because you need his support.
I don't think you should just stand by and be okay with him having a girlfriend. You didn't specify what you meant by you guys starting a 'fling', but if he has cheated on his girlfriend with you, you should talk to him about it. Let him know that your feelings have escalated for him, but that you understand and respect that he has a girlfriend.
You'll know how he feels by how he responds. He's either going to say something along the lines of, "Thank you for being so understanding. My girlfriend and I have been together for a long time and I appreciate you being okay with the boundaries of my relationship with her."
Or he will say something like, "Hey, don't worry about her." or "Oh, no, it's cool." Something that will make you feel like he's just blowing her off. Like he doesn't really care either way about his relationship with her.
If he responds like he doesn't want you to have respect for their relationship (pretty much what it boils down to), he most likely has stronger feelings for you too. But don't let yourself be put on the back burner. Don't let yourself remain the 'other' girl. Let him know that you're not going to further your relationship with him as long as he does have a girlfriend.
If he responds the first way, by saying that he appreciates that you understand, I would assume that his emotions are with his current girlfriend. In that case, as hard as it may be, you're going to have to back off. If you keep trying to pursue it, you really are setting yourself up to be badly hurt. You'll have to be okay with just being friends with him. It doesn't mean that you can't go to him for support and that he can't do the same. It just means you can't take your friendship to the next level at this point.
Good luck,
Darby
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I'm going 2 be in the Macoupin county Queen pageant for the Jr.Miss. One of the events we have to do is a talent. When I heard this from my mom, I thought and said," I don't have a talent." I've thought about juggling and singing so far, but I have some problems. 1.I don't know if I can sing in front of people! 2.I don't know if I can sing that good. Then for juggling I can only juggle two, so I'd have to learn how to juggle 3-4 by time the pageant got here. But I also want something really cool. I also do puppets, and I thought that I could do a little song with our little puppet stage. But, could I do that?, I don't know if we can. Can you please help me with some advice? Should I go with one of these ideas or no? And if not what could I do?
Oh wow, I bet that will be fun. Okay, so you need a talent. I think you should try to go with something that they don't see everyday. You know the judges see people singing, dancing, juggling, doing gymnastics at probably every pageant.
If you're good at writing poetry, you could try reciting some poetry. You would have to put a lot of drama and emphasis into it. But if it was a really touching poem, the judges would be blown away.
You could also try to do something random; like yo-yo tricks or magic. I bet they don't get that too often.
If you're allowed to and you have a dog, you could try to teach your dog a few tricks and perform them onstage.
The puppets thing is a really good idea too. You'll have to check with the organization to see if you're allowed to do something like that. But if you are, that would be totally unique and fun.
I just don't see dancing or just plain singing as really getting the judges attention unless you were really really good at it. And juggling would also be okay, but you'd have to be able to do at least 4 before it would be at all impressive.
I think any of these things would be good. The singing would be good as long as you were allowed to have puppets involved.
Hope this helps and good luck!
Darby(:
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my name is Rachel and iam 16 years old and my sister is always reading my diary what should I do about it?
my email is poohbear6bbbb@yahoo.com
You should get a diary with a lock on it, or one of those diaries that has the voice-activated lock. They're cool because they only open when you say your password and it will only open to your voice.
If these are not options that you would like to try, find a really good hiding spot. Don't hide it under your mattress or anything. I've always found a good hiding spot for things to be in my closet. I have tons of bags from sleepovers and shoes in my closet. It's as easy as hiding your journal in one of the pockets on the inside of a bag. It would take her forever to think of a spot like that.
You could also try letting your parents know that your sister is invading your privacy.
Darby(:
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I am a single mother of seventeen year old daughter.. I waited to date for all those years because I did not want confusion in raising my daughter. So now I am dating online.. Just started..
I wanted a Godly man.. so this guy I met online was very Handsome and educated.. Believes in God, goes to church...
He talks to me over the phone sees my profile says I made impression on his heart and mind..
I thought he is a good man, Hand some man..
He is divorced twice and has two kids from two different women..
We meet other day..loved our date.. he was saying he has fallen for me.. He would not move his eyes from mine.. He gave me so many compliments.. I was like are you for real.. we kissed for two hrs.. Hugged for hrs.. Date lasted for six hrs.. he made plans for next week.. I was like okay.. Now next day after my date with him.. I went to san fransico.. I was too tired to see him I did not see him.. he said it is fine then.. he stopped calling, texting.. He said on other text that he is not over his EX so cannot see me ...
By the way he had prayed putting hands on to fall for him... What happened????
It sounds like he got cold feet.
The same way a person might do before a wedding. He might have felt that things were moving too quickly for him. Since your first date consisted of hours worth of hugging and kissing, he could be overwhelmed.
But, it could also be exactly what he said. Maybe he was talking to you and really feeling like he was over his ex. Then, after your date, she could have called him and he may have realized that he truly does still have feelings for her.
Regardless, this is a jerk thing to do and it's completely reasonable for you to ask him what changed his feelings so quickly. He was probably just getting ahead of himself with the excitement of a new relationship without really thinking of how he felt about past relationships.
I'm sure this is very hurtful for you since you did wait so long to date. But look on the bright side, wouldn't you rather know now that a year down the road? It would be a lot worse if you were dating for a while, then you found out he was cheating on you with his ex or something. This was the first guy you met, and though it's hard, you're going to have to get yourself back out there. I would do it as soon as you can. Don't let yourself wallow in it. It will just take you longer to move on and date other people if you let this really get to you for a prolonged period of time. I'm sure you'll find a great guy that is 100% ready for a relationship with you.
Good luck,
Darby(:
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how do i make a good first impression on my first date ?
The most important thing to do is be yourself and let your personality show. If you're super quiet, the person isn't going to know anything about you at the end of the date that they didn't know beforehand. If you don't act natural and calm, your date is going to get antsy as well. Be talkative, but don't refuse to shut up for a few minutes to let your date talk. Don't disagree with a lot of what your date says. If he/she brings something up that you're not into, you can say so. But don't immediately shoot down everything he/she says by saying, 'Oh really? I hate that movie.' 'Oh yeah? I hate country music.' etc.. Not only will you appear to be argumentative, your date will also think you're negative all-around.
Don't try too hard. Just be yourself and roll with the punches. If your date can tell that you're comfortable and being yourself, he/she will be able to be comfortable as well.
Also, if you're a guy, do the typical polite things. Hold doors open for her, if you're walking on the sidewalk; walk on the side nearest the road. And if you're a girl, thank the guy when he opens a door for you or pulls out your chair.
Hope this helps,
Darby(:
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Well when i was 14 i got raped and i decided to keep the baby thing is though he is now 1 nearly 2 and i am having second thoughts of whether i should of had an abortion or not. I know it's abit late but i don't know what to do to make me love him the way i did when he was born.
Melissa
x~~~~~x
Well, first of all, I'm sorry that happened to you. Babies are a lot of responsibility and that's hard to deal with at any age, under any circumstances. Unfortunately, you are young and these are under different circumstances than most mothers. You didn't choose to get pregnant, but you chose to have the baby. You have to do what's right for your baby.
Maybe you just need to talk about it? Babies are extremely difficult when they're 1 or 2. They need constant attention and are 100% dependent on their parents or guardians. If you think you might just need a break and a night to go out with your girl friends, ask one of your parents or guardians if they can watch him for a night.
You also need to tell them what you've been thinking about. Tell them that you're under a lot of stress and that it's taking a toll on you. I'm sure they would be willing to help you in any way that they could.
You might also want to talk to a professional if you aren't already. Sometimes therapists can help lay things out in front of you as they see them. They can help you sort through your feelings and help you make decisions that are as big as this one.
If these feelings persist and you honestly feel as though you just cannot be a mother to this child right now, you're going to have to make a very tough decision. You could either give the baby up to a trusted adult (parent, guardian, aunt). Someone that is very responsible, wants the baby, and is financially well enough off to be able to support him. If that isn't an option, you could consider putting him up for adoption.
You should not make any rash decisions right now. You're under a lot of stress, which is understandable. You don't want to start making decisions when you're not in a clear state of mind. Give yourself some time to really think about what your life would be like if your son wasn't in it.
I don't want to see your baby get hurt or neglected, but at the same time, I don't want you to make decisions without thinking through them with the adults in your life that you trust. Talk to your parents and whoever else you can be open with. Let them help you sort through your thoughts and feelings, then make the decisions that are necessary to make.
Hope this helps,
Darby
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14/f...sorry about the length
Umm... so there's this guy that I've liked for like a week... and the other day he told me he liked me and asked me out. Just to get it straight, I've been asked out a lot, but I've turned them all down.
I told him since we hadn't known each other that long, we should wait a school week and see what happens... I really like him... he's a total sweetheart and is adorable and funny.
But here's were my self-awareness and fear of opinions comes in... he's sort of small... like maybe more than a few inches shorter than me. I'm only a few months older than him, but he looks like he could be a 6th grader (we're in 8th grade). Also, a lot of people think he's gay... haha... usually it's the boys. I think it's mostly because he's ADORABLE and because he has a bit of a lisp and his voice is sort of high... haha but I know he isn't gay because he's gone out with JUST girls before and he calls other people fags all the time. ;D Almost all the girls I know love him though, popular and not popular. He's just so cute and funny, I guess it's hard to NOT like him.
Now my school image isn't the only thing that's scaring me... it's also my parents. I've never had a boyfriend, and they always tell me that all of my boyfriends have to SIT DOWN AND TALK to my parents, and then DO CHORES. I don't know what goes through their minds... It's torture.
So I'm pretty sure my mom would LOVE him... but IDK about my dad... he's going to be, like, breathing down his neck, then he'll think he's gay.
So what should I do? The more I talk to him the more I like him (we've been talking non-stop over the weekend), and he's really really sweet. He's NOT creepy at all like some other guys who have liked me. All of my friends are just telling me to go for it... but...still... it makes me so nervous to think about it.
So do you think it's worth it? And what should I do with the parent situation if it IS worth it? I know I might sound contradicting and really shallow, but that's why I need the help.
Thank you sooo much.! :)
I think you should definitely go for it. I've dated guys that are a foot taller than me and ones that are at least four inches shorter than me. All that matters is if you're attracted to them and if they treat you well. Don't let what people say bother you. When I've dated shorter guys, no one has ever mentioned to me that they're shorter than me. It sounds like he's sweet and a good guy, so I would say yes if I liked him.
As far as your parents go, are you sure they weren't joking about making him do chores? I know my father always joked around about being overprotective about me, just because it's the stereotypical thing for a father to do when his daughter starts dating. If you think they're really going to force him to do chores, talk to them about it before you introduce your boyfriend to them. Tell them they you would really appreciate it if they just take the time to get to know him, and not completely embarrass you right away (ha). I'm sure once you talk to them about it, you'll see that everything will be okay.
Darby(:
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i have a square shaped face and i have thick wavy hair (which also tends to be frizzy and....fluffy?)
the problem is i like leaving my hair short (like a little longer than chin)
what kind of styles or cuts would look flattering for my face shape? pictures would be great!! thankss
I really like heart and square-shaped faces for whatever reason, haha. I think they're cute.
Here are some pics that will fit with how you like your hair and flatter your face shape:
This would work well if you wanted to curl your hair or even get a perm-
http://z.about.com/d/beauty/1/5/y/h/curly3.JPG
Celebs with same face shape:
http://www.visual-makeover.com/images/celebs/sandrabullock.jpg
http://beauty.about.com/od/bestcutsbyfaceshap1/ss/squarefaces_7.htm
http://cdn-write.demandstudios.com/upload//7000/600/90/4/7694.jpg
http://z.about.com/d/beauty/1/5/L/l/jessicabiel2.JPG
The first one on this page has the do's and don'ts of square-shaped faces:
http://www.ukhairdressers.com/hair_move/face%20shape.asp#1
Darby(:
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Okay here the deal ..
There's this guy named "T" who i went to go play pool with as friends.. Then we ended up crashing a party and he introduced me to his friends one was named "E" and "E" started talking to me and i guess we felt chemistry between us but before he could ask for my number "T" grabbed me and we left. The next day "T" told me he liked me on the phone and i told him i didn't like him. Then "E" called "T" and asked for my number and "T" said no she's mine. And i really like "E" but "T" likes me and i don't want to hurt him and tell him i like "E" what should i do?
tell "T" and let him suck it up?
or forget about "E"?
and "T" is the only way i can ever contact or see "E" again.. :S
Ouch, that's a hard situation. Since 'E' is 'T's friend, it is kind of crappy to date 'E' knowing that 'T' likes you. You have to do what makes you happy though. If I were you, I would try to get E's number in some way. If you can't get his number, find his MySpace or Facebook page and try to contact him on there in order to get his number. Don't tell 'T' that you like him right away. At this point, though there was obvious chemistry, 'E' doesn't really know whether you like him or not.
Talk to 'E' for a while and get to know him better. Let 'T' know that you have been talking to 'E' some, that way if you do end up dating 'E', it won't be a total shock. Once you've talked to 'E' for a while, if you're sure you like him, go for it.
'T' is going to have to deal with it. Yeah, he's going to be hurt at first. But hopefully by then, he will understand that he can't hold people down just because he feels a certain way. Maybe he'll even be nearly over his crush on you and it won't be a bunch of drama at all.
But, as I said, I would give it a little while of getting to know 'E' before you immediately decide to date him. There is the potential of 'T' getting very hurt, so you want to make sure you really like 'E' before you risk hurting 'T's feelings.
Darby(:
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hi i have a big issue not to long a go i had givin head for the first time an im so scared my friends are saying that i can get pregnant from swolling his cum im so scared can u help me ohh an im 13 aN MY NAME IS KALYN
You can't get pregnant from oral sex. The only way you could be pregnant is if his sperm got into your vagina. That wouldn't happen by swallowing his sperm because your digestive system is not directly connected to your fallopian tubes. Plus, there is stomach acid that would kill the sperm.
You can, however, get some very nasty STDs. Watch out for that.
Darby
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What keeps you goin evryday? why do you wake up and do the things you do? making coffee,makin love? is life worth it?
Life is what you make it.
It's an annoying quote, but it's completely true. If you have a pessimistic outlook, life is going to suck. Not everything is perfect and it's okay to let yourself wallow sometimes. The problem starts when the wallowing doesn't end.
You have to make life worth it. To answer your last question truthfully, no, life isn't worth it unless you make an effort to find people and things that you care enough about to make life worth it, despite the bad times.
The main thing that keeps me going is writing. I am constantly writing. It's probably becoming a health hazard, I do it so much. There is nothing in the world greater to me than a blank piece of paper and a pen.
You have to find things that you have real passion for. Whether it's sports, drawing, painting, photography, writing, music, dancing, sports, etc.. Anything works as long as you have a real passion for it (and it's not bad for you).
Life does suck at times, but you have to take everything with a grain of salt and count your blessings even when things aren't going the way you would like them to. Everything gets better eventually, unless you give up on yourself. Just give it time and try to stay positive.
Darby
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should i go to my best friends birthday party where almost everyone hates me?
You should go, but try to stick by your best friend the whole time in order to avoid drama. You said almost everyone hates you, so I'm guessing there's at least a couple other people that don't. Just hang out with those few people and try to have a good time. If someone does try to start an argument, just take the high road. Since you'll be outnumbered and it is your best friends party, you don't want to ruin her birthday by getting into a fight.
Darby(:
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i am asking this question because my boyfriend acts like a complete ass and hes 16 and i am 17 but hes going to be 17 this coming up month. but any ways he just acts like he doesnt care about me but then again i know he does. but it seems like he doesnt anymore can you tell me why??
my age is 17 and i am a female from upstate ny
Some boys are mature and some are immature because people have different personality types and maturity rates. A boy that's thirteen can be more mature than a guy that's 20. Different people just act different ways.
As far as why your boyfriend is acting like he doesn't like you, there could be a lot of reasons. Does he act like he doesn't like you when you're in public or with his friends? If so, he might just be embarrassed to show affection towards you while he's with people.
You should talk to your boyfriend and tell him how you're feeling. Ask him why he's acting the way he's acting. He can probably offer some insight into why he's doing what he's doing and how he's feeling at this point in your relationship.
If he's too immature to even talk about this subject or try to help you understand what's going on, you should consider a breakup. You might be more mature than him at this point. If he's not ready for a committed, serious relationship and you are, you're not on the same page and your relationship probably won't last.
It takes two people to have a good relationship. If your boyfriend's not going to grow up and do his part, he's not the guy for you. Don't expect him to change overnight. Just let him know how you're feeling and what you feel would make your relationship better.
Try not to approach him with direct blame. Don't say things like, "You act like a complete ass. You're so immature because..." No matter what you say after that, he's not going to be listening. He's just going to tune you out and get defensive.
Instead, talk to him in private and say something along the lines of, "You've been acting (such and such way) lately and it's really hurting my feelings. I wish you could understand my point of view." And just continue your conversation from there.
Darby(:
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Hey Im not sure if you remember but I asked a question not so long ago asking whether I should give in to this guy I really like.
you the whole continious flirting cutting off contact then etc..
I liked the advice you gave me so i thought id ask your opinion on what I should do I hope you dont mind and would aprciate if you got around to answering =]
turns out I didnt give in and get with him last weekend even though I really did want to i regretted it abit but I was proud for not giving in.
since then though he has not stopped texting me being really sweet etc,he even invited me to his parents wedding in a few weeks.
so im there thinking yeaa how long is this gonna last he'l talk to me then stop until right up before the wedding and looks like thats happend now.
I know myself what hes like and what hes doing but its just when he is talking to me I dont know he just makes me feel so happy and special (pathetic I know)
but he has something that makes me like him and makes me compare him to every other guy.
I guess what I wanna know is how do I stop feeling this way towards him? how do I get past it so il be able to just look at him feel nothing and say no without feeling totally regretful afterwards
have you any advice on what I should do? it seems like no one really understands and I find it so hard to explain it.
thanks for your time and any advice you have =]
Jessie.x
Yes, I remember you and I'd be happy to help(:
There are two different things that could be happening in this situation:
A) He knows that you're hard to get, and that's making him want you even more. Before, he was flirting with you then randomly ignoring you. Now that you didn't give in last weekend, he's texting you all the time, being sweet, and even invited you to his parents' wedding. Some people are attracted to others that play hard-to-get. Except, you're not playing. He might not know that you're serious about not giving in.
OR
B) He respects you for not giving in and hooking up with him last weekend. This new found respect is making him actually like you for you. He really does want to get to know you better and be sweet to you now. He's seeing a different side of you than he sees in most girls he's been with and he likes that.
I was in a situation exactly like this for a couple years, and it really is hard to explain how it feels. I completely understand though. It's like you get excited every time he's sweet and it makes you forget about the times that he has ignored you.
What you're asking is advice on how to get over the feeling. In a situation like this, I truthfully found that the only thing that will make you not feel this way is time. I tried every single thing I could think of to get over the guy that I was like that with. I tried distancing myself from him, talking to him about it, and ignoring him. I found out that the only thing that would work is giving myself time to get over it.
I tried to not think about it as much as I could. If he popped up in my mind, I would distract myself by reading, writing, or calling a friend. One day he decided to text me (after ignoring me for nearly two months) and I found out that I was completely over him. I didn't even feel like responding to his text message. I just thought he was annoying at that point.
And I still feel that way. He's texted me and called me I don't know how many times trying to get me to come hang out with him. I never even falter. Any time he's asked over the passed year, I've just laughed it off and said, "Nah, I'm good."
It really is a good feeling when you truly get over it.
If you read this and start wondering if you should give him a chance since he is being sweet, I can help you weigh the pros and cons.
Hope this helps,
Darby(:
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Hi!!!
Well, this guy I like...he confuses me. He likes me and we date than he asks me if he my friend likes him..I told him the truth, no. Well after we start dating my friend ( not my friend anymore) starts to like him and she tells me that he doesn't like me and crap. She told me that she wouldn't date him because I like him a lot ..well now they are dating and this guy I like is going to get hurt because my ex friend is a jurk..she likes 3 other guys plus him..and she told me she didn't even like him that much. So, he dumps me for her..and he broke up with me because he says that I lied about my friend liking me.He won't believe me..but it's true. I'm really heart broken and I don't know what to do..please help.
Okay, so, he asked you if your friend liked him while you guys were still dating? That's off to me. If he's dating you, he shouldn't be worrying about whether or not your friend has feelings for him. He should only be concerned about you and how you feel about him.
That's also a really stupid reason to break up with someone. He broke up with you because you told him she didn't like him, and she did? This guy is obviously a jerk.
You say your ex friend is a jerk, too. I would say they're both jerks, which makes them perfect for each other. You shouldn't worry about whether or not she really likes him or if she doesn't like him much and actually likes 3 other guys. If I were you, she wouldn't get an opportunity to tell me that because I wouldn't be speaking to her.
I don't think you should try to get involved at this point. Telling your ex boyfriend that your ex best friend actually likes three other guys too will only cause drama. You'll be heartbroken a lot longer if drama gets started. Your ex boyfriend and ex best friend will start saying things that they don't really mean.
Your ex boyfriend will ask your ex best friend if she really told you that. Your ex best friend will say that she never told you that. Your ex boyfriend will believe her because he won't want to believe that his girlfriend really likes three other guys. They will both say that you're trying to get them to break up because you're jealous.
That will be the exact course of actions if you try to tell him what your ex best friend told you. You should just steer clear of both of them. You can find a better boyfriend and a better friend. If they're going to be immature and play games, just leave them behind. Spend time with your other friends and don't respond to calls/emails/texts from these two.
Darby
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Well i really like this one boy (for short i'll call him L) and well i m not the skinny type but i m not super fat or anything like that. We always talk and its super great. Me and him can joke around like (Hey so what are we doing later tonight?) and stuff like that. I really like him and i m not sure that he likes me I really wish he did cause i see him every where what do i do??? Im at the middle school 7th and 8th and a girl duh!
Well, first of all, it doesn't matter whether you're fat or skinny or in between. If a guy likes you, he's going to like you either way. You should probably just ask him directly if he likes you. It's a situation where you can't really tiptoe around it. You can either keep going with things how they are now, and not know how he feels. OR you can ask him how he feels. If you don't want to just come out and ask him, see if he wants to hang out alone sometime. Tell him that you want to see (insert movie title). If he says he wants to see it too, say "Oh really? We should see it together some time?" If he says yeah, it's practically a date. Hopefully after that, he'll let you know what's up and if he's up for a relationship.
Good luck!
Darby
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Ok,so made a move on that guy.
It came out the way I expected it to,not necessarily bad just not going to be anything happening there.
And I think I'm ok with,it's just moving on.
What is the best way to get over a guy you've liked for a long time?
thanks
The best thing to do is take time away from him. If you talk to him often, try to distance yourself from her for a while to allow yourself time to move on. Meanwhile, start hanging out with your girl friends more. Have a few sleepovers or girls nights out. The more you do to keep yourself occupied, the less time you'll have to think about the guy. If there's a hobby you've been wanting to try for a while (photography, drawing, sewing, writing), try to get a friend to sign up for some classes with you. If you've got photography classes and you're hanging out with your friends a lot, you won't have very much time to think about you know who. Eventually, you'll realize that you haven't thought about him in a while and that you're actually getting over him. Once you're completely over him, you can go back to being friends with him if you're up for it. If not, just meet new people and keep your options open for new relationships.
Darby(:
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I have no clue what cattagorey to put this in, :P
There's a book I read last year and it was incredible, but I can't remember for the life of me what the title was.
It's about this teenage girl, (god forbid i can't remember the main character's name either) who goes on a trip to somewhere on a plane with a bunch of strangers her age. She meets Miranda and Arnold.. and soon the plane crashes into some island. Everyone dies but her and Miranda survive just long enough to be kidnapped and be experimented on. Main character girl turns into a fish and Miranda to a bird... Eventually they meet up with Arnold and he's some reptile. They finally break free with the cure and go back home, keeping the secret of the island to themselves.
If you could help me, I'd be sooo greatful :)
I believe the book you're talking about is called Dr. Franklin's Island. It's by Ann Halam.
Here's the Amazon link:
http://www.amazon.com/Dr-Franklins-Island-Readers-Circle/dp/0440237815/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1243651753&sr=1-1
Check out the cover and see if it looks familiar
Darby(:
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