I am a teenage girl who loves to dance! I have a lot of advice to give to anyone who needs it!! feel free to message me!
Member Since: January 5, 2012
Answers: 23
Last Update: August 7, 2014
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Dear Vikki
I'm 24 and from South Africa. I have been in a relationship for almost 7 months now and before that we were only friends. I love him a lot and care about him a lot, but at times I feel that my insecurities gets in the way and it ends up in us having an argument about something small and stupid. See we have a long distance relationship at the moment and it is mostly when he cannot have decent conversation at night because his busy and then I start thinking "maybe he doesn't want to talk to me" , "maybe he doesn't find me interesting anymore and he will leave me for someone else" and I do know that he cares for me a lot and that he loves me and as soon as I think I have these feelings under control, it creeps in again. I don't want to lose him, because I was insecure and clingy. I never was like this in the beginning. I was cheated on before and most of the times it is when I'm away from him, when we are together, I don't have it and because of this it makes things hard for me. I care about people real fast and they can actually hurt me with words. How do I get past this? How can I get past my insecurities and not be clingy when I feel like these emotions are creeping in? I'm not jealous when it comes to being his girlfriends, because I know what type of guy he is. I know he will never cheat on me, but because I don't always see myself as beautiful, I'm sometimes afraid he will leave me for someone more beautiful than me. The guy that cheated on me used to say to me, that I shouldn't think that someone can love me, because there feelings will change. I was so deeply hurt.
Is there any advice you can give me? Guess I'm just looking for someone to talk to that I don't know personally!
Thanks!
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Hi Vicki
It is totally normal to feel insecure in a relationship, especially of you have been cheated on in the past. I suffer from anxiety and self validation works well for me. You have the most control over yourself and you have to make sure that you know that. To improve confidence, treat yourself to a new outfit or anything that makes you feel beautiful. If your boyfriend knows of your being cheated on in the past, talk to him about it. I'm sure he will understand.
I hope this helps!
:)
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Ok so now I'm 12 and had sex with my boyfriend a couple of times and I had sex with two other guys and don't give me a lecture about that! Anyway I didn't get my period last month and I'm late this month and don't think I'm gonna get it. I've bEen feeling really sick lately and been having stomach cramps and been feeling tired. I've also had headaches. Is it possible that I'm pregnant? We didn't use a condom any of the times we had sex (link)
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I totally agree with the other answer. Honey, you are too young to be having sex in the first place. But to not use a condom? And have sex with more than 1 guy?? I know this is not what you want to hear, but if you aren't pregnant then I recommend that you go back to enjoying your childhood.
It does sound like you are pregnant, though.
I recommend you tell your parents now that you might be, and then take a test. They will be angry, but hiding it isn't going to do you any good because they will find out eventually. Unfortunately, because you are so young, you have absolutely no say in the well being of your baby (if you are indeed pregnant). This means that if they want you abort you have to abort and if they want you to give it up for adoption. This is because you are not at the age of consent yet.
I know I did lecture you and I understand that you are probably very scared right now. I hope that I helped you though. Good luck!
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Me and my boyfriend is thinking of having sex and im kinda scared cuz I've seen his penis before.im just soo scared. He's 15 im 13 (link)
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You are too young to be having sex.
Only do it when you feel completely ready, and understand the risks.
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oh. my. gosh. I swear there are a gazillion tiny demons hacking at and stabbing my vagina. -12 yrs. old- -female- (duh) ok so I haven't had my period yet but I've been having the worst cramps ever in the past couple days. the bad thing is, I think my periods coming soon and I hate tampons but I do waterpolo!!! -yikes bad combo- please tell me one1: any little remedies to stop these frickin' demons (the ones I mentioned earlier.) and two: what to do about waterpolo+the hate of tampons. (I cant even get one in) please help before I fall onto the ground and scream in agony=( (link)
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Yes, I hate to break it to you but this does mean that you will probably get your period soon! Don't be scared though! I was so afraid to get mine and it isn't that bad once you get used to it!
There are a few ways to soothe your cramps that have helped me.
1. Lay on your side in fetal position and put a hot water bottle on your stomach
2. Take a hot shower or bath
3. Walk around or exercise- movement can help!
4. Take Tylenol, Motrin, or midol
Also, like you I was super afraid to use tampons and didn't like the idea of them at all. I am a ballet dancer though and pads didn't cut it (and they won't for you either! :)) when you do get it, maybe on the second or third day try it. TRUST ME it seems super scary but really, it's not that bad.
I recommend playtex gentle glide lite slender for your first try!
Don't worry! Hope I helped! :)
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hey so as you know ill be 15 soon and my mom said shes trying to get this free insurance thing or whatever so for now im considering the options of getting an anit-anxiety pill. something that will bring my anxiety down and my depression up. i read alot of reviews on celexa and like 9/10 people said they love it, but then again i dont know their age. they said the side effects are minimal so im happy about that. also do they have to screen you or something to tell you you have generalized anxiety disorder? How old are you? and how has it been working for you? thank you so much (link)
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I am 14/f and it works amazingly for me. I have no side affects at all and feel really good. Before I went on it I was having severe panic attacks every day, and some days I didn't go to school because I was so depressed. They have worked me up from 5mg to 20mg and I feel completely normal. It has really helped me to get my life back.
So basically, when you go to the doctor to tell them you want medication, they will ask you questions about your anxiety and depression and they will recommend a medication for you.
Hope I helped and message me with other questions!!
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Hi.. I'm from France, so Iive in a place where there are many, many skinny girls.
I'm 12 years old and I don't like the way I look.. I don't know what to do anymore. I want to get into excersizing, but nobody will help me by telling me like the routines and stuff.. I just want to lose the fat in my face SO SO SO SO much. People keep telling me it's "baby fat", but come on... I'm 12. Why would I still have baby fat if i'm 12?
I just hate the way I look. I'm thinking about starting to starve myself like I used to and count every single calorie I actually eat. If I can't seem to find excersize and a loss of weight, it'll have to come to that :(
I just hate the way I look... Can someone help me? (link)
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I'm 14 and I still see girls that have a little bit of baby fat! The truth is, they have such soft pretty features that sometimes i envy them (i have a somewhat angular face). You seem like your biggest concern is in your face, so you probably aren't fat.
trust me, you are beautiful and you will los it eventually, for now stop worrying and enjoy what you have!
hope i helped :)
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Hi everyone. I'm 18f, and have been running for about a year and a half or so.
I'm on a college team this year and we train 5 days a week... but lately my body can't seem to handle it. I am tired and weak all the time, and I eat constantly but my hunger never seems to be satisfied!
I don't get as much sleep as I should, admittedly, but I wonder if there are other factors in my feeling this way.
I raced this morning for example, and all day i haven't felt good (Muscle weakness throughout my body, achiness, general fatigue, hunger/nausea)
I am confident that Im eating pretty healthy. I eat a good amount of carbs and protein, and I try not to over-do it on the sugar. I've been drinking water and tea a lot too. Any thoughts anyone?
I'd really like to hit a new PR this season!
Thanks very much and God bless (link)
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I also dance for 5 days a week and feel the same sometimes. With my height and weight i should eat 2800 calories a day. You, seeing how much you exercise should be consuming over 3000 probably.Try eating foods high in carbs and protein a few hours before you run.
Sleep is also extremely important. Try very hard to get at least 8 hours of sleep a night.
hope this helps :)
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f/almost 15. i have gone through sooo much in my life and i have just recently ended a horrible mentally draining and abusive relationship with my father a narcisssist. in my parents divorce my older brother took sides with my dad and my older sister took sides with my mom everyone was seperated accept for me and my two other brothers. it was such a strain on me.. but that wasnt enought for my dad he got me involoved in enverything. evreything i didnt need to be stressed out about i was. i was the most popular, outgoing, hilarious, outspoken girl in my grade. when this happend when i was in 6th grade all my middle school years were ruined by my dad but i ddint see it then becSUE HE was so manipulative. now my family is not sperate anymore they made up but im still dealing with problems im releived i let go of my dad but im still dealing with depression. it feels like i will never recover. everyday is a sad day and every second im miserable. BUT first with my period it is very bad with med-heavy flow with HORRIBLE mood swings and HORRIBLEEE cramps in my thighs that feels like im getting stabbed repeatedly all the time. i talked to my mom and therapist and said that if it affects you that much you should consider going on the pill. and im like great ok that gives me some relief at least i can try something. but then i ask my mom because my older sister is getting on it and she doesnt wnat to hear it, beacuse right now im only 14 but in 3 monthes ill be 15. its not like im fucking 11 and im like yeahh i think i should go on the pill..like no?! my mom and everyone knows i have a high pain tolerance so when i complain about an ache or pain ir really DOES hurt. and my mom doesnt take it seriously, and its just really aggravating. i also have bad anxiety stemmed from depression that once again i got from my father....and i have never gone on any medication at all so im hesitant to try anything. becasue my dad pulled me away from my normal everyday kid life and wanted to make me as miserable as he is i just neglected evreyone else included my friends. i feel like i have no one. i dont hangout ith anyone becasue im so stressed out. my anxiety is really bad. i also talked to my nurse at school about it and my therapist and they said just to calm you down but make you happier too you should get an anti-anxiety pill. My nurse suggested first taking the pill because its everyday and it may even treat my anxiety as it is to treat the mood swings on my period. the reason i think i have anxiety is becasue i mean i have never been diagnosed for anything but im pretty sure its obvious i have depression and im sufering from anxiety becasue i get it everyday. they also said get it at the OBGYN not the peditrican. but i also told them that my neglecting dad doesnt pay shit and is not paying health insirance. i have.no.idea.what.to.do. my dad last time i talked to him said the new job he got he got laid off from and he doesnt pay health insurance even though I NEED THIS at least to check it out...but he doesnt care. he, becasue i have brothers int her 30's, my dad is like almost 63 and i remember him one time saying he wanted to retire meanwhile my mom is broke and only getting little unemployment. my nurse said and my therapist go to the OBGYN for the birth control, not the pedtrician since they are specialists in your period and stuff, but i dont know how this is going to get paid for and im starting to wonder if its even possible. thankssss (link)
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Ok, there is NOTHING wrong with taking either of those pills. I have anxiety and depression and am on an anxiety pill called celexa and it helps me SO much. i've heard of girls going on birth control at the age of 11, as long as it is to help with your period it is perfectly fine, DON'T feel bad about wanting either of those.
As for payment, maybe for birth control you could look into planned parenthood, i know that sounds scary they may be able to help. As for the anxiety, if your dad can afford it he should be trying to help you.
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18/f I FRICKIN' HATE FRIZZ. I've had to deal with it all my life. It's what I'm known for, unfortunately. I have medium-length brown, thick, frizzy hair. But beneath all the ugggggllllllllyyyy frizz is some beautiful natural curl I have! So, I wanna know... Are there any natural tricks or solutions to tackling frizz without straightening or curling it, etc.? Like for example, I've heard of rinsing it in cold water, or whatever? I never have time or skill/knowledge to actually do my hair in the morning. But I'll tell you what I do, just so maybe you can tell me if I need to do something, or am doing anything wrong?
I shower at night. When I'm done, I towel dry a ton, then wrap it up in a towel while I brush my teeth, and all that other junk. Then after a while I take it out and brush it. Then I put in some mousse, but only a little. Then I go to bed. I wake up and it has this natural curl to it that I love. But it's over-shadowed by this layer of frizz floating on top of it. It's sooooo freaking annoying, I hate it so much!!!! Out of desperation, I'll try to put more mousse on it, even though my hair's dry. But then when I look in a mirror at school the frizz has popped up again, like I had never put any mousse in it in the first place. I don't know how to do my hair, or braid it, nor do I have the time in the morning. I love having my hair down, but sometimes the frizz is so bad I just have to put it up in a pony tail, which looks so plain and eeeyeuck.
I hate to be picky, but I cannot use hairspray. My friends for some reason love to play with my hair, and if it was all stiff, it would be weird and awkward, lolol. But anyway, yeah. Caan someone help me~??? (link)
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My hair is pretty straight but I have heard from my curly haired friends that after you get out of the shower if you scrunch in a curling gel that wont make your hair crunchy that will help a ton. Also, try using argon oil on hair, it makes it frizz free, soft, and shiny.
Good luck!
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SO it really isn't MY cousin but it's my sister's cousin(because we have different fathers)so any ways i really don't like her. It all started when she started problems with my family but cheated on her boyfriend with one of my actual cousins. My brother in law was blamed for telling the cheater's boyfriend the truth. At that caused the whole family to choose sides and I went with my brother in law because my sister's cousin was already getting on my nerves. But my mom and sister yelled at my brother in law a lot and now he doesn't live with us. Then I just plain out started disliking her. She was only suppose to live her for 2 months alone but now she has moved in with her boyfriend....then she brought home one whining baby that she had with her mother and now she has her 2 kids living with her! I can't stand it anymore. It feels like my mom and sister are her slaves, they drive her everywhere, take care of her kids and everything! She's always put in front of me. When I need to get picked up from school I always have to wait because they need to drop her off or pick her up first. It feels horrible. So if anyone bothered to read this....let me ask is this all in my head? Do I have no reason to be like this? What should I tell my mom and sister? They already know I don't like her. So thank you if you get to this point. (link)
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It sounds like you definitely have an issue going on in your family! No, your dislike for your distant cousin is not in your head. You have a reason to feel remorseful about her because she had intruded on your family and made your life more difficult. It sounds like your mom and sister are a little bit afraid of her, so they'd cater to her needs whenever she wants and she probably knows this. Maybe you can work out a compromise with hour mom, sister, and cousin. If your cousin has any heart at all she probably doesn't want you to feel upset, the same goes for your mom and sister. Try telling them honestly how you feel and work out a compromise so you aren't t the one always waiting.
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Hi there so I am 18/F
So I have a lot of guy friends and a few girl friends, most of which are short, except my best friend who is 6", I however am 5"9 and I feel soooo tall, I look at my girl friends who are 5"5 or 5"6 and they get a lot of guys, I get guys and everything, but for some reason I look at my girl friends and I feel freakishly tall and weird, I am skinny, I eat a lot but I don't gain weight, I weigh about 130, I just don't understand why I feel so ugly around my friends, is there anything wrong with being this tall, I feel so insecure when I go out with them. Why is it that tall girls aren't as pretty as short girls? (link)
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I'm kinda tall too (not insanely but a little taller than most of my friends, im in my low teenage years) I love my height though! trust me, tall people are envied. think about it, most models are tall and they are beautiful. Everyone is different, you just have to learn to love your body and yourself for who you are.
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so im not skinny but i'm kinda chubby and i bought a pair of pants today and they didnt fit when i tried to put them on. So im thinking about becoming anorexic to lose weight. i just dont know what to do. (link)
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Anorexia is not the answer to losing weight!!! it is a severe mental disorder and never a diet. You can get health problems for the rest of your life from being anorexic!!! I would recomend trying to love your body for who you are! trust me, everyone buys a pair of pants that don't fit at some point in their life!
love yourself!
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I am not sure if this is the right category. But a spider bite me. Its like my meat around it is dead it made a small circle witch is now black. It is very sore. And we are too broke to go to the dr. Any home tips. We cleaned it whit Poroxside. And we clean it every night. HELP PLZ 13/f (link)
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you should go to see a doctor!!!!!
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ive been dating the same guy for a year, i am completly in love with him! i love being with him and everything about him, so my dad got a job offer for brazil! i live in colorado and were moving around august. i told him im moving and it didnt go so well. everytime i think about leaving him i just want to break down and cry tell i cant cry anymore. im im in love with him and i dont think i can just get up and walk oit of his life like this, i dont think its fair for me or him. he was my first everything. first kiss first holding hands first sitting on lap first make out first everything i even lost my v card to him. hes told me he still wants to be with me after i move, i told him we cant see each other or anything and he said he doesnt care he wants to be with me and he would even buy a web cam to speak and just to see my face, what should i do??? im so lost!! everytime i think about leaving my heart breaks more and more (link)
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I hate to tell you this, but long distance realtionships normally don't work out. Honestly, i think you both should go your separate ways because staying together will be too hard!
:)Good luck!
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Okay, so I need advice on how to deal with my parents' extreame aggression.
Here is the thing, I am not a perfect child, and I know I can do wrong sometimes, but sometimes my parents get mad for littlest things. Their way of dealing with situations is not pleasent. Whether I deserve the trouble or not, this is usually their dealing process.
1. Extreamly loud shouting (not bothering to listen to explanation)
2.Hit me/Throw stuff at me (they have punched me, pulled my hair, whipped me with a cord, slapped me, etc. I wouldn't considerit child ABUSE, but rather excessive force.)
3.Threatening to kick me out/police station (I've been taken their, and kicked out of the house on a cold night)
What should I do? I don't know how to deal with their anger rages, and all the hurt... (link)
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you need to go to someone you trust like a teacher, guidance counselor, or a friend's parent for help. All of the things your parents are doing to you ARE considered child abuse. Hopefully, the person will go to the police and you can get help. Nobody deserves to live with and abusive parent!
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Ive had these red bumps on the tip of my tounge for the last week and i cannot seem to find a picture on the web that looks like mine, now these bumps just showed up but ive always (since i was a child atleast) had white -ish bumps on the back of my tounge. im just a little worried and hoping that someone might know what they are. (link)
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well.. the white bumps are your taste buds and those are normal but in mot sure about the red ones. You should see a doctor if they continue to get worse!
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i dont want to live , why should i ? i dont feel happy anymore (link)
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Just because you are going through a period of sadness in your life doesn't mean you have no reason to live!!! Keep pushing through life and things will get better!! trust me! you just have to hold your head high and tell yourself that you are a good person!!!
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I'm a 14 yr old girl and the other day my dad found weed in my sisters jacket he went ballistic. He punched her several times and then choked her. All our mother did was say No, Stop,No. Like wtf is that going to do? My dad is a very big and strong man. When I do something wrong like forget to vacume my dad wraps his hands around my throat like he's about to choke me. It's been like this for me ever since I was About 5 or 6. I just can't continue to live in constant fear. The even that happened recently with my sister I just can't seem to get it out of my mind. I get drunk next day wake up have a hangover still remember. Get high still freaking remember! I just don't know what to do. Please help me (link)
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YOU NEED TO GO TO THE POLICE!!!! this is not right and because your mom is not doing anything that is considered abuse!! I recomend going to your guidance counselor at school or a teacher you trust. DONT KILL YOURSELF!! you are a valued human being that doesn't deserve what you are going through!!! things will get better if you go to the police and you can get your life back on track!
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Hi, my name is Keana. I am 12. My parents won't let me have an email address and I'm in middle school. My older sister has one but she has bad grades. I don't have bad grades or an email address! All of my friends have one and I feel left out. Every time I try to talk to my parents, they seem irritated, but I just to talk about it. What do I do? (link)
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E-mails really aren't dangerous things. You have the option to use a fake name and age when signing up as well. I recomend gmail because it is very safe. try to convince them by showing them ho responsible you are. also, explain to them why it is really important to you and even suggest they talk to some of your friends parents who have emails about it so they can see it really isn't bad!!!
Good luck :)
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I am having the hardest time losing weight in my stomach. I eat pretty well (recently I've been really good about eating...very few carbs, a lot of fruits and vegetables). I am fairly think everywhere else (not very toned...but thin). I hate workign out...i occasionally run but i hate it so its rare. however- my stomach is huge. its fatty, and i have rolls- its awful.
what can I do to fix this- and fast!
Thanks so much! (link)
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try doing pilates sit-ups where you lift your legs up when you do your situps. that is really good! also, try doing bicycle kicks. I do these exercises in dance and my stomach is rock hard.
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