E-mail:
lawwing-yan@hotmail.comGender:
FemaleLocation:
Edinburgh, Scotland.Age:
20MSN:
lawwing-yan@hotmail.comMember Since:
January 20, 2011Answers:
179Last Update:
April 20, 2014Visitors:
10025about
Hey guys. I'm just a girl going through the transition of a teenager to an adult and all that it entails.
I've had a colourful life with many a lesson learned and much to offer. Whether you want advice, support or just a chat then all you gotta do is reach out.
I'm honest, whether it hurts or not, but i'm fair; open minded and philosophical, a little crazy yet very logical, at times rather controversial.
If you have a question go ahead and ask!
advice
If a doctor checks if a girl is a virgin can he tell if she has had anal sex or will he only see vaginal sex?
If there is any swelling/redness/irritation/injuries incurred from anal sex then, yes, a doctor can tell that there's a possibility you've had anal sex. But if you've suffered no physical problems as a result of anal sex then it is highly unlikely that the doctor will know.
The vagina has a thin membrane called the hymen that ruptures during the first experiences of penetrative sex. If that membrane is broken, the doctor will know that your vagina has been penetrated. However, a broken hymen can also happen from masturbation, tampons and even certain sports such as horse riding. Whilst a broken hymen is a good indicator of virginity, it doesn't quantify sexual intercourse with another.
Because the anal opening has no such membrane, it is very hard to tell if a person participates in anal sex with absence of irritation/injury.
In an exam it is highly unlikely that the doctor will check anal virginity. If he/she does check your anus it will only be to ensure youre also healthy there as well as vaginally
I just started dating this guy like a week and a half ago, and his birthday is right around Christmas. We've been friends since the start of the school year, but I don't know if I'm supposed to get him a present...? We are only 14, and not very serious yet. Any advice? Do I need to get him something, and if so, what are some ideas? Thanks.
I'm sure he'd appreciate some consideration from you on his birthday. It doesn't have to be anything big. A small gesture like a card and something you know he'd like. Or perhaps making a point of celebrating his birthday with him and arranging a day/night out at a venue he likes.Regardless of what you decide to do for the occasion, it's the effort you make for it that shows someone that you care.
The guy i am in love with says that he loves me too but he never acts like he loves me..he never calls me,never cares about me.only texts me once a day or two days saying that he misses me...i don't understand him..help me plz
He doesn't love you. What an a hole. Find someone that's worth your love. He surely isn't reciprocating it.
My parents are strict and I have always been required to answer them with yes sir, no sir, yes ma'am, and no ma'am. I am required to answer all adults this way and some of my friends think it is weird and they have been teasing me about it. I have talked to my dad and he will not let me off the hook when it comes to respect and manners. He will not let me just say yes or no I have to keep using sir and ma'am even though my friends never have to with their parents. Any ideas on what I should do?
Listen to your parents!
Todays generation is so disrespectful. Your friends may think it weird, so be it. Your real friends wouldn't mock you for who you are. Their parents may not enforce such values upon their children but it's their children that are openly mocking you for respecting your elders. What does that say to you?
Your parents have brought you up with strong values. There is nothing wrong with that - if anything, it's something severely lacking in society. You should appreciate what your parents are trying to teach you.
Have some pride in how your parents raised you. When you're older you'll be so proud. It seems as though they're doing a great job with you.
Our 16 girl wants to date a 20 year old man who dropped out of High School, doesn't have a job, lives with his mother and is not very intelligent. Our girl is in middle college and gets straight A's.
This all started 3 weeks ago. She lied about his age and the nature of the relationship. One week in we discovered the truth and decided that we had to intervene. After speaking with both of them about how it was not only an immoral, but possibly illegal relationship, he was quick to point out the legal age of consent in our state is 16. We told them to wait until she's 18. He seemed rather upset, so the next day I went to his social network page where he had posted the following:
"me plus you equals violence, creepin up behind you I'm stalking you silent, dressed in all black I'm the nighttime assailant, grab you by the neck and stab you with my nine inch, knife, quick like, I end lifes, no strife, i mean i need just one swipe, and then I wipe, your existence away, I'm the evil son, so let me in to play." I also found older posts of murdering people and my favorite" My penis is a weapon".
Though her mother was with me on keeping them from dating, she is now thinking supervised visits is a better option to divert a possible Romeo/Juliette scenario after we discovered that there were over 1400 texts between them in 9 days. Her thinking is the more time they spend together, the more likely the girl will be to discover that the price charming is really a toad. I think a forced separation is in order complete with GPS activated on her cell phone so we know where she is at all times (she has a car).
I am very saddened by all of this because I had a close relationship with her. I have spent a long time explaining why dating him is a terrible idea and that we are really looking out for her and trying to protect her. Since I was the person who told them to stop, I am now the worst person in America. I know after a period of time she will someday be able to appreciate what I am doing, but for now she thinks I am mean and stupid. It would be helpful to be able to give her reason's on why dating a 20 year old man is not a great idea since my reasons have not resonated with her.
I am totally stumped on what to do in this situation and welcome some new ideas.
This guy seems like he is potentially bad news. Not necessarily because of his age but in how you've described him. I'm with your wife on this one.
Your daughter has deceived you before about him. There is nothing to suggest she won't find ways around your rules and can end up completely rebelling against you - potentially to a seriously problematic degree.
You and your wife know this guy is bad news but she has to learn the lesson herself. In a few years she needs to make these decisions on her own and she has to make mistakes.
Supervised visits ensures you know where your daughter is and what she is doing with this man. It is a compromise: she can see him under your conditions. And at the slightest hint of trouble from him or his influence on her, the deal is off. Let her have her relationship with this man, and be there to advise and support if/when she needs it.
Chances are they aren't going to be together forever. See where this goes and give your daughter trust until she breaks it. Remain in control whilst compromising with her. Regularly communicate with your wife and daughter and get to know more of the man she is seeing.
The guy isn't good enough - you know it, your wife knows it. As your daughter matures, she will to. It seems like a phase. Regardless, stay on alert and ensure your daughter knows she can come to you with anything.
okay so i'm 14 and i have a boyfriend for a while now , we had sex about once or twice now and i'm worried that i might stop developing my breast and my height. i'm a A cup and 5'3. does having sex stop your development?
Not in the slightest. And if you need to be asking such questions you shouldn't be having sex. Educate yourself.
so there was this girl that i kinda had a crush on. shes trans. and people bash on both of us almost everyday. im a pretty girl and eveything. boys like me and everything.
but i feel so confused, please help...
i tryed to take my life the other day. because the mean things people were saying, were honestly making me wana die..
:/
Labels should be restricted to cans of tuna.
Bottom line: if you are physically attracted to a person and have emotional feelings for them, there is the potential of a relationship. Be it male or female, does it matter that much to you?
There is no rule written that says you must only be attracted to males, females, whatever.
Perhaps you do find yourself dating a girl you really like. Maybe you'll find other girls thereafter or perhaps she was the only one you were attracted to.
You may well be bi. There's only one way to find out and thats being honest with yourself and having the confidence, should you like a girl, to see where it goes.
My boyfriend just admitted to having a gambling problem. I am proud of him for taking the first step by admitting he has a problem and also having himself personally banned from the casinos anywhere in the province we live in. However, we now have no money for food, rent, or bills. I'm debating on whether or not I should tell my parents and ask them for a little bit of money just so we can get some food to tide us over until next payday, but I have a strong feeling that my mom will tell me to leave him and I don't think that's what he needs right now. I want to help him with this! I don't think my dad would be as judgemental, but he doesn't want me to say anything to them...please help! I'm sad, lost and confused! =( Also, what else can I personally do to help him through this?
You can support him. That is all you can do. He needs to do this on his own. This is only the beginning.
Get him some professional help. They will work intensively with him as well as with you in terms of what you can be doing to support and help manage his addiction.
Talk to him regularly. Encourage to open up to you and learn to recognise when something is wrong. Get to know his habits and warning signs, when he is in a moment of weakness be there to pick him back up. Get it all out in the open and reassure him that you're in this together.
Do all you can to support him but don't let him depend on you. He needs to be able to get through this on his own merit. You wont always be there to help him.
So consult your GP and treatment options. Be involved in his treatment, be prepared for hard times and don't let your faith and support waver. Be his standing pillar when he has nothing else to hold on to.
My better half has decided to go on an unusual and strict diet of water and rice. He is 34 years old and around 14-15 stone but would like to be 12 stone.
He works 5 days a week at a local mini supermarket but all he does is have water until tea time when he has one bowl of rice.
It was day one yesterday and the result was he lost 3lb but had no energy during or after work and was feeling faint.
I personally don't think it is good for him health wise and it has already began to affect our communication as he is very quite and a little touchy.
Is there any better diets out there for him that involve him eating more but without putting any weight on?
After work he usually works out upstairs with weights and general stretching.
Of course it's not healthy and he knows it.
His blood sugar level will be low so he'll be feeling groggy, irritable, lethargic throughout the day that a normal healthy breakfast would prevent. His bowl of rice, containing sugars, will raise his blood sugars and that's the only source of energy his body is getting, which wont last long.
His goal of weight loss won't be achieved. His body is missing vital nutrients in order to function thus his body is going into starvation mode. Every calorie he consumes will immediately be converted into fat, his body will cling on to all the energy it has and will stubbornly cling to the fat he's also trying to lose.
It really is simple - no fad diets necessary. If he ensures he is getting his essential water, vitamins, minerals, protein, fibre, carbohydrates and GOOD fats daily, then he'll be giving his body the nutrients to function at its best as well as improving his performance in sport and fitness.
Tell him to properly educate himself on nutrition before half starving his body. A healthy amount to lose per week is a MAXIMUM on 2lbs. Any more than that and his body's setting - the weight at which it's comfortable with - will stay at 14-15 stone and he'll end up gaining back the weight he lost and more. Its so often happens when people dont do their research.
Starchy carbohydrates, lean meat, a rainbow of fruit and veg, and healthy cooking methods will ensure his weight loss. Instead of 2500 calories a day he can cut it down to, say, 2100.
If he wants to realistically lose weight he'll also need to up the ante on his exercise routine. An hour's jog in the AM - cardio is essential for fat burn, building muscle with his weight training, exercise classes. There's so much he can do.
If he wants the results and for them to stay permanent, he has to put in the hard work and know how to properly take care of his body. Education, education, education.
As a guy, sometimes I have trouble initiating sex, but mainly when asking for something only for myself.
My girlfriend has no trouble with oral sex, she isn't grossed out by it, and she says she likes making me feel good. We've been together for a year, and normally she has to initiate this.
We have slightly different libidos, so there are times she'd rather give oral than have full on sex with me, or during her period.
Sometimes I end up feeling selfish when it's only me getting pleasured and she isn't in the mood for it, which is one reason why I have trouble asking her for it. People have said "just be direct and ask," but there is literally no romance in that.
Is there any good way to ask her for oral sex when I am wanting some, or any indirect way of showing her that I want it? Also, I'm not going to push her head down or do anything that direct or degrading.
Make advances towards her. Let her know how you're feeling.
I can usually tell when my partner wants it by the things he does, the way he looks at me, kissing me and it starts to get hot and heavy, travelling hands, etc. Evidently hes aroused.
Whether I'm in the mood for full on sex or not I'll still give him oral because thats what he enjoys - even more so than penetrative sex. And if we're not having full on sex I'll try to make it extra special.
So let her know how youre feeling through affection. When youre both getting in to it guide her hand and then lean back. She'll get the message.
17/f
So I have this new boyfriend and things are great.
I was talking to my guy friend who I was sorta involved with before and we got into this argument because he hates the fact that I have a new boyfriend and stuff. It got to the point where he was telling me he cares about me more than any guy I date. This guy always pushed me to do more with him all the time, but I never wanted to have sex. I always told him that making out is as far as I'd go.
Well then he was like, "It's not my fault about everything that happened. You shouldn't have lead me on by making out with me."
I'm wondering if that's true that making out with a guy means that eventually there's gonna be more.
Like, I usually wouldn't have believed this but one of my last boyfriends almost raped me cause I didn't want to do more.
My guy friend who was all mad at me was saying that if I don't want a guy to push for more, don't make out with them.
I've already made out with my current boyfriend and it scares me that he's gonna push for more.
I'll probably end up talking to him about it later but what's your opinion? I know I have this guy friend who might just be jealous but is what he's saying true?
Making out with someone by no means gives the okay or expectation for anything more.
While it is true that kissing etc. can cause sexual arousal,it is nothing more than one of many physical expressions of mutual feelings between two people.
Your friend hadn't any right to expect anything more of you: you did not lead him on. It sounds as if he has feelings for you; this is evident in the way he treats your current partner, his disdain for any romantic partner that you should have, as well as his consistent self attribution whilst conversing with you.
You didn't reciprocate his feelings, you got a new man - he was probably hurt and reacted. It's important not to neglect friendships when you have a partner so find ways to reassure your friend and make some time for him.
Finally, when entering into a relationship it is important to be open from the beginning in many expectations you have of eachother, including sexually. You shouldn't be worrying that your partner will expect more of you until you are both ready. Talk to him about it and get his take on things, figure out where you both stand. He hasn't, thus far, pressured you in to anything.
Don't tar them all with the same brush. Have the conversations that you need to have. If you cant do that perhaps you need to reevaluate your choice in partner or whether you're ready for a relationship.
Again, I reiterate, kissing is NOT an invitation for sex if you don't want it to be. Just as a hug isn't an invitation for a kiss :)
Can you guys give me an explination as to why im havin this opain?
Going to need a bit more info there. But if you're a female in your teens and still growing it's completely normal that your breatss can become painful and tender as they develop. Ensure you get properly fitted for a good quality, supportive bra regularly and that it doesnt make you chafe or irritate you in any way. You should be fine.
I just want to know where i stand with this guy.
A guy that I work with has been flirtatious with me for like 2 months now. We've hung out outside of work like twice, but hes been giving me really mixed signals. For example, he will hardcore flirt with me and then act like I don't really exist for a short time.
I was so close to never thinking about him again when today we had lunch breaks at the same time and he said he was going to go home to eat and asked me to go with him, so I went to his house with him.
I llike him but he has a girlfriend, and they have a 1 year old son together. I don't want to be involved with him if he's already dating someone else, and obviously I don't want to break up his relationship with the mother of his child. A few times when we have been flirting I bring up that he has a girlfriend- I told him not to talk to me in such a flirty way unless he plans to break up with her, and I told him I dont want them to break up if they're happy together, but in response to that he said they aren't happy and that they've been on and off for almost 5 years now.
I like him, as a person whether we flirt or not...id like to be his friend but I find it difficult because every time I try to think of him as just a friend, he comes on strong with the flirting again.
And since he does act like hes interested in me sometimes, I find myself thinking about him more than I should..and I know it's wrong because he has a gf and a baby - not to mention his attention towards me is inconsistent.
I really love flirting with him and imagining the possibility of having him for myself... But I don't want anyone to get hurt, especially his girlfriend...or myself.
If he doesn't like me, then why does he want to hang out and treat me like he's interested in me? And if he just wants to be friends....why can't he act like we're strictly platonic? Should I tell him how I feel about him? What does he want from me???
Many taken guys are flirtatious with girls but mean nothing by it. it's just their humour, having a bit of fun. However, this does not seem to be the case with your co-worker.
You were completely right in telling him you dont want to get involved when he's taken and a child is involved. He's acting irresponsibly. Whether he wants to risk his relationship with his partner and kid is entirely his call but he has no right putting that on you.
even though you've told him not to be so flirtatious, I suggest you tell him again, clearly and bluntly. When he does it again tell him straight up you won't stand for that behaviour while he's with someone else and if he continues to do so you will terminate leisurely time with him. You are happy to be friends with him but you will not tolerate that. Put it to him and make sure he knows youre serious.
If he treats you badly because of it, he's clearly not a decent guy. You shouldnt be punished for his inappropriate behaviour and you having class and morals.
You're doing the right thing. The last thing you want to do is let your feelings for him escalate when he's unavailable. It's a platonic relationship and thats it. No flirting.
So this guy... (Matt)I like him.
The probelm... I don't know if I stand a chance.
Background: Matt is seventeen, a senior. I'm sixteen, a junior. Freshman year I dated one of his best friends. It ended reeeeally badly on the last day of school. Through out my sophomore year, Matt and my ex drifted, and Matt and I grew closer. But I was kind of in between liking Matt and another guy so it fizzed. But I would go out to lunch with him about once a week, and we'd talk when we saw eachother, always reallly flirty. And he wanted to ask me to prom, but the other guy asked me first... (That's when it fizzed). Over the summer we said we would talk alot but he was out of town (visiting family) for like a month. And the thing is, he hates being on his phone. Like, he doesn't like texting, or even calling. So though we used to hang out one on one, we don't really anymore and we don't have a lot of mutual friends. But recently, it seem's like he's been making an effort to see me more or text me more, but it's reallyyyy not much. I just don't know what to do. I really like him. And I think he likes me, cause he IS really flirty (slaps my butt, telss me to go to all his games) and his friends all think he likes me cause apparently he doesn't "go out of his way this much" for a girl before. But I've never met a guy as confusing as this... So what now??
He likes you and he's making this clear!
Guys love confident girls and the days are gone where the man has to do all the work. Believe it or not, guys like it when girls take initiative. Ask him out and see where it goes. I think you'll find he's very receptive.
I am 19,i urge to hav sex. But i have been controlling the desire... And now its overwhelming.
What you're feeling is absolutely normal. As we get older we become more curious about our sexuality and want to start exploring and acting upon the urges we feel. While this is perfectly healthy, it is important to go into this being as safe as possible.
Should you decide to go that step further and sleep with someone be sure that you completely trust this person. Ensure that you are really ready for this step both mentally and physically. Ensure you are fully educated about sexually transmitted diseases, you are well protected and you know what to expect when you start having sex.
Until you are ready you can always turn to masturbation. It takes the edge off and lets you explore what works for you. It's much more common than you realise.
well im 15 and about 120 pounds.
recently i have become VERY self concious about my body. everytime im with my friends I'm always comparing myself to them without thinking about it.
Everytime i look in the mirror or even think about my body i get this really weird feeling like dizzyness and just like a shallow feeling in my chest and I know it's not good t think about that stuff but I can't help it?
does anyone know why this is happening or why i feel like this
i hate to even look in the mirror so i decided to just stop because I just feel so disgusted :/
What you are experiencing is absolutely normal and very common for a person of your age. Your starting to become more aware of your image and how other people see you.At the current weight you are there is no reason to suggest that you are in any way over weight.
Generally people are their own biggest critics; you'll find that what you dislike about your body many people will fail to see what you dislike about yourself.
Getting the nutrients your body needs it vitally important so having a varied and well balanced diet is key. It would be worth while to read up on nutrition information and what it all means so that you can ensure what youre putting into your body is good for you (though there's nothing wrong with the occasional treat!)
Most females are never entirely happy with their body but there is so much you can do to improve your own self esteem. You can take up a sport to keep fit and healthy. Not only will it benefit your health but it will give you the confidence that you lack and much more energy. Try different sports and see what you enjoy best. Swimming, running, tennis, cycling, gymnastics, rock climbing, football, hiking: theres a wide range out there for you to try and enjoy.
If you want to tone up a little bit there's nothing wrong with that either. "8 minute abs/legs/glutes etc." is still a favourite and widely accessible on youtube that you can do at home. Or perhaps start doing yoga classes.
There are many people who can't be thin enough in this world and no matter how thin they get they will never be happy. It's how YOU feel about yourself that makes a difference. And there's nothing wrong with keeping fit that will also help you feel better for a variety of reasons.
You know what else you can do? Get dressed up and have a girls night out with your friends! What girl doesn't love putting on pretty things and having a great time with friends. Give yourself a break!
i think i have bulimia and im frightened of the fact that maybe in the future i might not be able to conceive. is there anything i can do about it? and one that does not involve taking drugs.
Bulimia nervosa is an eating disorder and therefore a psychiatric condition in which a person binge eats or otherwise consumes significantly large amounts of food at a time and then purging what was just consumed. A smaller percentage will, instead or purging the consumed food, will excessively exercise it off or fast. Abuse of laxatives is also common. The reasons or contributing factors of bulimia are similar to that of anorexia nervosa.
People with bulimia are much more likely to develop affective disorders such as depression, general anxiety disorder and even substance abuse. There are many symptoms of bulimia such as: Cardiac problem, esophagus inflammation and tearing, ulcers, infertility, constipation, gastroparesis, dental erosion, etc.
Treatment is usually psychotherapy in conjunction with drugs (though this is wholly dependent upon the individual and the severity of the disorder as well as any additional problems i.e depression.)
Your best mode of conduct is to see your general practitioner (GP) right away and they will be able to assess whether you will need psychiatric help as well as other ways in managing the problem. There are many different forms of help out there for you and your GP will help you decide which course of action would be the best for you.
Voice your concerns and trust the people to help you before it escalates.
how does it feel whenn your putting on your braces
Its not painful in applying them. But for the next week or two after getting them your gums become tender due to the braces forcing them into a different position. So it would be best to stick to vey soft foods.
I also found that the braces would cut into my mouth so i was given this wax to put over them. It's just all about your mouth and teeth adapting to these new things in your mouth. Once you've done that, theres no problemo!
k so im 16 and still a virgin, i masterbate all the time but only with my fingers...i want to use a vibrator because im scared that when i do it the first time the penis wont fit, so do you recommend i use a vibrator and if i use a vibrator does that mean im not a virgin anymore??? Please help!!
Masturbating (no matter the size and girth of whatever you use) does not take your virginity away. Until you have penetrative sex with a man, you'll still be a virgin.
Sex toys are a good way to solve your problem. There are different styles and sizes out there. I suggest you start with something smaller and progressively increase the size to the average girth of a penis.
Take your time and relax. Remember you are stretching your hymen. For some it takes longer than others and if you tense up it'll make it all the more tight and unpleasant.
Ensure you use plenty of lubricant, you're sufficiently aroused (this causes the cervix to lift and the inside to become longer making penetration more comfortable), and listen to your body in terms of what feels right and what does not.
Hello,
My name is Kailey and i am a 17 year old female. I am struggling with my self esteem becuase of certain parts of my body. My libia is alot bigger than most other people and i dont know why. I know none of my friends are the same so i feel so left out. I have a bf and we do have sex but i wont let him go down on me.. i honestly dont know if guys think this is normal or repulsive, people have made fun of them unfront of me becauase i guess i dont seem like i would have them, i am pretty popular and my boyfriend is the sexiest guy ever.. which makes it even harder for me to be okay with this.
Hi there.
You may be surprised to hear that your problem isn't as uncommon as you may think; women come in all shapes and sizes, that includes intimate areas!
Lets look at the big picture: you have a partner that you're sexually active with. He clearly doesn't have a problem with it otherwise he wouldn't get intimate with you.
Many women find themselves judging parts of their bodies that they believe doesn't conform to what is normal or desirable yet here you are with a boyfriend who clearly likes your body how it is. most of the time, the biggest critic of all is ourselves. If anything, guys find it more of a turn of when we aren't comfortable with who we are.
It's not so complicated with guys, if they don't like it they wont put up with it. I suggest you talk to your boyfriend and I think you'll find that he doesn't have a problem with it. Instead, just relax when youre getting intimate with him. Learn to love yourself and you will see that it's not as bad as you think it is.
I have been sexually active with many women and trust me - there is no normal size! It very much varies. You are not a alone.
If, after much hard work, you find you still cant accept your body the way it is and/or you find yourself having physical problems (e.g chafing, discomfort, irritation, etc.) then you can have it surgically reduced. In the UK this will be covered by the NHS should you meet the criteria. However, if you dont live in a country with a national health service i suggest you look into your health care insurance and have a talk with your GP on your options and your concerns.