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a crush since forever
I am a girl, currently in Grade 12, and I have had a crush on this one guy in my grade since halfway through first semester grade 9.
He is really cute, and he loves singing and history. He is really funny, but can also be quite serious. He tends to be quite loud in class(he is in no way shy), but he is so sweet and kind and honest that the teachers rarely get mad at him.
I am quite(extremely...) shy when in a group setting, but one on one I tend to open up a bit. However, I only ever see this guy in class, in choir, and when our two friend groups (occasionally) hang out together.
He is always hanging around with this one group of girls, but he would never date any of them, so I know that's not an issue. The problem is that he's always with them. I get along well with all of them, a couple are even sort of my friends, but it would be awkward for me to just join their group when they are talking or whatever. I have in the past, like if they are in my class and my regular friends aren't but its just a little awkward...anyways yeah I feel too awkward to get closer to him that way.
He jokes around a lot, and when we are in a small group of people together, he sometimes/often teases me more than the other people in the group. In class the other day, he came over to talk to me, and he asked me about why I had been late for class that morning. He has done similar things a number of times in the past.
Also, just to point out, he is straight. I know this for sure. The girls he hangs out with have been his friends for years, they are like sisters to him...
Another problem- I am scared to tell my friends I like him. I told them a couple years ago, but they laughed and told me we would make a really awkward couple (probably because I'm 5'9", and at the time he was super skinny and like 5'3", but he's grown since then). I would love to have their support, but we don't really talk about guys much, and I feel like I've been lying to them for years about this guy..not that I ever lied...I just didn't speak up...
Also, casual out-of-school meetings are difficult because he lives in a different city than I do, although we go to the same school (it's a private school). I can't just casually invite him to do something with me like randomly on a Saturday because he lives like a 45 minute drive away..
I guess what I want to know is: do I have any chance with him? and how do I got about getting that chance?
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If he came over to ask why you were late and he is teasing around with you I would say that is a good sign that he is interested in you. I believe the best way to handle this would be to ask him about his hobbies. When he starts to tell you, show your interest by asking questions and then tell him you would love hear more about it. Ask if he could call or text you later and tell you more. If he is interested he will. Then once you develop a comfortable texting relationship flirt with him a little bit(tell him you bet he looks really hot playing tennis, riding motor cycles, bowling...whatever the hobby is)and see if he takes it to the next level by asking you out. Step out there and take a chance unless you want to spend the rest of your life wondering "what if"!Good luck!
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Hi! Well, perhaps you can find him via social media or something that is a little bit less intimidating. I wouldn't worry too much about your friends. You say that you are in grade 12, which means that you are about to graduate soon. Maybe your friends felt that way then, but they changed their minds. Regardless, it doesn't really matter. Once your setting changes and you aren't in high school anymore, what people around you think will become less and less important. I would say try via the avenue of social media, maybe like some pictures. That way it won't seem so random because you've grown somewhat closer through social media. Maybe you can have a get together and invite some people over, including him.
I hope this helps!! :)
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You really need to involve yourself in more social events, preferably where he will be. I don't say to act like a stalker either. This will not only help you get closer to him, but it will help your self confidence to be in public gatherings. If, and from what you've written, you have barely even hung out as friends, then I don't suggest trying to immediately date him. You don't want to commit to a relationship with a stranger would you? There are always two sides if not more to people - 1) Who they think they are and 2) Who everyone else thinks they are. Become friends first, take that leap, it does suck but sometimes it's very necessary (been there done that) even if you pretendbyou need help with some type of project inside or even outside of school. Make a fundraiser over the summer, ask a group of people to help out including him, or make a group chat or page or something about a commonality that most of the kids in your community enjoy over the summer. As great as it is to meet someone who is opposite to you it's just as nice to have common interests as well. This way if you end up in a relationship with him you'll want o be sure you're not bored and neither is he if you don't enjoy the same things. As for chances, I would say you have as much of a chance as you're willing to work at it. It really depends on what style you're looking into getting his attention and what type of person you are. Flirtatious? Good girl? Outgoing? Spontaneous? Etc... Let me know I may very well be able to help but focus on whyvyou are first. YOU are the most important person in your universe and nobody can ever change that.
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Hi dear,
Well,I suggest getting a new group of friends who will not make any fun of you at all! Second,boys tend to tease in pubic to girls they may like,its just this insecurity thing they have going on. Anyways,it's up to you,do you think he worth all the trouble? If you both drive,then seeing eachother should not be a problem at all. Maybe try setting him aside,and drop hints of our feelings,it may help,and he my start getting the idea.If not,they are many people out there,perhaps the right man <3 Good luck
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What is your situation like in regards to getting home from school? What about his? If you have the opportunity, your best bet would probably be to hang out with him while you're both waiting to be picked up. If you both have cars, maybe ask to hang out after school for a little bit before heading home? You don't have to jump right into asking him out, but you need to be able to spend some time alone with him.
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Hi there. My thoughts on your situation are very brief. I think you should take things slow and push back a little. Refrain from telling your friends everything but go straight to him and tell him you need to talk about something. Say it under cover like you're talking about someone else but throw in hints that you're talking about him and if he gets it and likes you back, you will know.
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I can see that you really like him, but you don't know for sure that he likes you back, he may only think of you as a friend but there's no harm in asking about it. Maybe you should try to get him alone and hangout just the two of you, I think that your best bet at the moment. Try not to be too straight forward but don't be too shy about it either, not all guys are smart enough to take a hint. Go easy on him though. I'm not sure if he is worth the time though, I say hangout alone with him and see where it goes.
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Okay so it's obviously a good sign he hasn't dated any of those girls and that the girls aren't rude to you or anything. I would definitely say you have a chance (: about telling your friends.. On one hand, if you told then, that would secure your spot with him so that your friends know you like him and they can't go after him. However, on the other hand, girls especially tend to spread things. So unless you want that spread around the school, I suggest you only tell a few friends you are super close to and trust. It was a long time ago so I doubt they'll laugh but if they do then who cares? I know you want their support but teens are often lame and immature so they might not give it. I say you definitely go for him! Make your move! Its a great thing that you've liked him all these years and if he knew that (once you guys start dating unless you want to express your feelings instead of asking him out) that would probably be good brownie points for you. Since he lives far away, find a good place halfway between you two. Its okay if it's like a 20 minute drive bc that's not that much. But yeah find a nice restaurant or a movie theater or a good hangout place, whatever suits your fancy. But yeah that's what I suggest. Defintiwly do something though! If you're in 12th grade you have no time to lose!
Hope this helps ~
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The question what happens when something happens? You said you are a senior, so you must have plans for college and so does he? Are they in the Realm of each other? You said so yourself you couldn't hang out outside of school because of the distance, so you wouldn't be able to go on dates. The question isn't about whether he likes you or not, he does. It isn't about you not having a chance, because you do. I think if there are too many obstacles that would prevent you guys from having a normal, non awkward relationship, it wouldn't work out. The best thing to do is to ask him hypothetically if you guys were to do an activity outside of school, would he be willing to meet you halfway.
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I"m delighted that you decided to ask me a question.
Well, of course you have a chance!! But no one can tell you how much of one. Only you can find that out by continuing to develop your friendship/relationship with him. Keep upping the ante by deepening the conversation about other topics. What he thinks, how he feels. And share those things with him to the extent you are comfortable. Listen to learn more about him. There's much you don't know, like why he doesn't date. Not saying that is a problem but I bet there are some interesting reasons. Your friendship can grow into more but first you have to develop the friendship. As you get to know him, you'll see if you still like him as much as you did before. Be open to whatever comes and remember, there are other guys out there too!
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Hey so i was so interested in this question because that is so similar to the situation i was in. So i will explain what happened to me and how i solved it. so basically i liked this guy (who is now my boyfriend) since 3 grade. Although our personalities are different. He is shy and i am more like loud and out going. So he has a certain group of people he hangs out with.He thinks of them as like his best friends/siblings. So i have had a little problems with my friends. I have a lot of friends and every last one of them think that he is ugly/ gross but thats their opinion and i think he is perfect...Anyways, i told my friends that i had a crush on him and they all said stuff like eww and he is gross and he isnt right and crap like that. So i had to reach out to his friend. Which could be something you can do.Text which ever girl you are closets to in the group of girls he hangs out with and tell her how u feel and ask her to help you out. If she follows thru then you may get a text from your crush. Then that would be your chance. If you can drive, you can invite him out to somewhere at a halfway point between you guys. Or just flirt with him.If you need more help after that point just keep in touch
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