Hello, I am a recovered anorexic. YES, YOU ARE! Anorexia has nothing to do with vomiting. That is bullemia. You can still have an eating disorder, even if you are at normal weight. It's called eating disorder otherwise specified. The only difference between anorexia and EDNOS is that to be diagnosed as anorexic, your BMI needs to be below normal. Yours is DANGEROUSLY below normal. All of these patters are exactly what I did. I am glad to hear that you are aware that these behaviors seem a little off. You need to get help RIGHT AWAY! The longer it takes to get help, the more difficult this will become. There is a huge risk of becoming bulimic and turning to binge eating to replenish. Please get help. Message me personally and I will give you my contact information. Just ask me a question through here and I will reply! :)

There are many things to consider here. First, as much as I hate to say this, you are a minor. Being a minor, especially in your older teens is hard! I remember that when I was 17, I wasn't allowed to have my own bedroom. I had to share a room with my mom in my grandparents house. I wasn't allowed to drive. Oddly enough, they wouldn't have cared about either of the above. But, they cared about really trivial things, like sleeping alone. As a minor, there was nothing that I could do about it. I don't agree with this because although you are a minor, you are a person. But, unfortunately, the law is set up this way.

When you said that it's been four months, I was shocked. I would think that this went on for a month or two, not four. That over a quarter of a year. I would talk to the and ask them how long they are planning to keep the ankle bracelet on. I would even suggest writing a letter so that you don't forget everything you want to say. As you mentioned, you are aware that you violated their trust. So, that is a step in the right direction. You're not denying that a rule was broken. As your friend said, you could have been prohibited from going out at all. I think that in retrospect, it would be worse to be locked in the house rather than just you're parents knowing where you are.

But, you are getting older. You are almost an adult. I think you should talk to them about how you need to grow in autonomy.

I hope that this helps. xoxo

I am in a very similar prediction. We are the same age and my parents are around the same age and divorced as well, 10 years longer than your parents lol. I hate to be the one to say this, but the odds are not in our favor when it comes to them changing. My situation is slightly worse. I don't live with them, but I live in mom's efficiency. Through the years, I held out hope that once I became an adult, they would change. Once I moved out, they would change. I was living elsewhere for a while. But, this is their "normal." In order to create healthy boundaries, you need to stop answering their calls. Tell your dad and mom that you they get two phone calls a day for now and to use them wisely. They will try to push this, but you need to stick to your boundaries. Don't feel guilty. If you do not set the boundaries it will NEVER get better. I would love to chat as I feel like we have a lot in common and I've never met anyone my age dealing with similar issues!!! My e-mail is: cfern064@gmail.com

Hi there! I work in a university in Florida. I'm not sure what state you are in, but here, you need to go directly to the office. Usually, financial aid doesn't call anyone back due to the volume of calls that they get. You may have to go in person. If you are not able to, you will need to sign a document that gives someone the authority to look into your financial inquiries. This needs to be in writing because of FERPA law. So, if you want a friend to go for you, you need to write their name and authorize it.

Hope this helps xoxo

that's hard to say. I don't think there is a universal set temperature. One starts to get wet as she becomes more and more aroused.

As I answer this question, I am hoping and praying that it is not too late. I hope that I have written this in time to stop you from making a terrible mistake. Your partner is just being a jerk. It is likely that he is hurt and in mourning as well, thus lashing out and saying things that he does not mean. I can assure you that your pets will miss you. Please don't do this to them. Just because you have found care for them, someone to feed them and meet their physical needs, does not mean that person will meet their emotional needs. They need YOU. They see you as their family. They love you unconditionally and they WILL suffer. I lost my cousin a few years back to cancer. HIs little dog, Lola, still searches for him everywhere. She sleeps in his old room and cries constantly. Some family friends of ours lost their mom a few months back. Her dog, Kiara, who is now in their care, looks out the window for her and cries every night. You are not dispensable or replaceable to your furry babies. Please don't do this to them.

God loves you. You can always message me. In me, you have a friend. You can send me a message any time and I will give you my personal e-mail and phone number.

God bless you xoxo

Lol, that's a cute story. What you are describing is silly, but not abnormal. People do all sorts of silly things!

Mental health can be a tricky thing when it comes to children. Although mental illness does not discriminate against age, because children's brains are not fully developed, sometimes doctors are weary to give diagnosis, medication, or be willing to institutionalize a child. You would have to check whether or not the institution accepts children as well as research whether a diagnosis is available for a person this age.

Hi honey. I'm sorry to hear about what you are going through, with your friend and the other areas of life that you talked about. I don't judge you because we all have addictions. When I was a teenager, I turned to an eating disorder to cope with my issues. Cutting is not that different. Both give the illusion that you are in control of something. They ease an anxiety in some way, shape, or form, even if it isn't healthy. Today, my coping mechanisms for dealing with anxiety or anger are: prayer, music, writing, and working out. Although you are not cutting deep, cutting is still very dangerous. Your skin is an organ and you are damaging it when you cut yourself. Self-inflicting wounds on yourself is not physically or psychologically healthy. You can try the following and see if any of these help:

Get a rubber band and tie it around your wrist. When you feel the urge to to cut, flick the rubber band against your wrist.
Use a stress ball. Similarly, when you feel that urge, squeeze the ball.
Write about what is bothering you. Use a journal to organize your ideas into a cohesive document where you can let out your emotions.
Call a friend. Use an accountability system. Call that friend when you feel the urge.

I needed to get help with my eating disorder. I couldn't do it alone. Do not be ashamed to get help. We all have addictions and it is difficult to break away from them. A professional can guide you through this process in a non-judgemental environment.

Please let me know if you need anything. My inbox is always open :)

Honey, please do not do anything like that! Please contact me personally if you need someone to talk to: cfern064@gmail.com. I beg of you... please do not do this, whether it is to yourself or to someone else. You are such a beautiful and amazing person. I, too have felt like I've been in a place where I just couldn't handle what was going on. I was very overwhelmed by so many factors and I just wished that I could escape. I felt like I was being choked and I couldn't breathe. Prayer and help from a professional got me through that phase in life. It can do the same for you. And you will look back and barely remember this terrible time.

Hi! i'm really glad I received this question in my inbox because I have gone through some similar issues. I first found this website when I was 14. My mom found it online one day, accidentally, and she shared it with me. I am now 26 and I still use this site. I use to write here about advice on my first kiss and recently, I posted a question about trying to get pregnant I've seen questions from the younger crowd and from grandparents on here, so I don't think anyone is too old for this site. It's about reaching out and finding people to engage with about our day to day issues.

Regarding your life in foster care, I can relate a little because I am adopted. I found out I was adopted when I was 18. This new found information brought out a lot of emotions, including betrayal, and finally acceptance. I've met my biological parents and that has meant including more family into my life.I process a lot of my emotions through writing and music, two things that are meant to be shared. I run a blog and I have a youtube channel. Naturally, issues regarding adoption (like not being told for so long, and how "grateful" is the only feeling socially acceptable for adoptees). I also started writing a lot about my faith after accepting Christ into my life.

Before any of this, I would consider myself to have been VERY superficial. I would stay home from school if I was having a bad day and paid a fortune to look tan all the time. Don't get me wrong. There's nothing wrong with wanting to look your best. But, there is a fine line between self grooming and self absorption. I was the latter. I have changed so much since those days. I find that the more I expressed myself and the more I talked about my faith in God, the more friends I lost. I was friends with this one girl from the time that I was in second grade. She didn't even remember my birthday this year. I'm not going to lie. It really hurts. In my heart of hearts, despite our growing apart over the years, I always saw her as family and didn't imagine in a million years that she would forget my birthday.

People are uncomfortable with what is different, particularly if they are superficial. Some people want to surround themselves with people that don't show their feelings. They want a friendship on facebook photos, but they don't want to be your friends in times of trouble. You and I are both people who like to give. We give our hearts and our friendships. So, we are surprised when others don't give that back. Sadly, they are cowardly. They can't deal with some of the harsh realities that you and I have had to face in our lives.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You are open. You are not afraid. You are courageous. They wish they could only be a half of what you are. But, they cannot, which is why they need to find other superficial people to engage with.

I hope that this helps. If you have any other questions, please feel free to message me directly. You can also contact me on this website:
cristymarxo.wordpress.com

Hello :)

Read your bible daily. Pray and ask HIm for guidance, ask Him to help you find the way to be closer to Him. The most important thing to know is that we are not saved by works, but through faith alone. Our good deeds are meaningless without faith. Similarly, our faith is meaningless without our actions displaying God's will! Please feel free to message me if you would like to talk more/pray together/study the bible! :)

God bless you,
Cristy

Hi there! I"m sorry for the delayed response. I hadn't been able to check my account for a few days! Have you thought of tutoring? You can charge about $25.00 an hour. Do someone's nails. Blow-dry their hair. Take dogs a bath. Mow some lawns. Babysit. Clean some houses. You just have to put yourself out there and let people know that you want to do these little jobs. I hope that this helps. Finding ways to make money can be difficult. If we all had the answers, we would all be a lot more well off! I hope that i provided you with a few ideas that might be helpful. Best!!! xoxo

Your so welcome ❤️ Thank you for the message!

This is clearly anxiety. There is a couple of things that you can do. First, you can address the anxiety. Try figuring out what calms you. There are plenty of youtube videos offering calming music. You could also talk to someone. I've dealt with terrible anxiety. It wasn't until I addressed that, that I was able to deal with the problem you are describing above. If you feel that you can't make sounds when you are feeling nervous, like this, a speech pathologist can help! They are usually covered by insurance. Your university may even have contracted speech therapists. They also help people with these issues. I hope that this advice was helpful.

Hi there! Hopefully, I can help with your questions. An MA in Liberal Studies does not really train one for a specific job. It's not a training program, like say teaching, medical school, or law. It really leaves you with the decision of what to do with this degree. I wouldn't recommend this degree for someone who has not specialized in something either academically or through employment. For example, if someone has been teaching for 5 years and wants to get a master's degree in order to get a raise or a promotion, then this might be a good fit. If someone has a degree in politics and just wants to further their career and get a raise, then this might be a good fit. But, if you don't have a strong foundation in at least one career, then this will not open many doors for you. Sometimes too much leeway is not good int he workforce. Employers are looking for someone who specializes. In the workforce, it is hard to be good at many things. You have to try to channel your talents into more specific tasks. I hope that this helps!

Hi honey,

I came across your question and it really touched me because I remember what it was like to be your age and crazy about someone. When I was 13/14, I honestly believed that anyone I knew at the time could be someone that I ended up marrying. I wanted to believe in the type of love that I saw in the movies. I'm 25 now and it's taken me this long to realize that at 13, I was not mature enough for a relationship and that my attempt to find the type of love that I wanted then was doomed for failure. If I would have known then what I know now, I would have done things SO differently. For one, I would have held off any type of flirtatious discussions. I would have focused more on school. I now have a successful career. But, one of my regrets is not going away for college. I would go back and spend more time with my family instead of trying to get away from them and trying to be more independent. I would have pursued a talent. Another regret of mine is not doing sports and not taking my music more seriously. These were things that my mom didn't let me do. So, it was easier for boys to get my full attention. If I would have gotten this advice from someone 12 years ago, I probably would have rated it a 1 because I thought I should be old enough to make my own decisions. But, this story that I just shared is mine. However, it applies to a lot of teenagers. A lot of times, the guy you are talking to feels like the only guy in the world. But, he's not. If you just want his friendship, then there is nothing to worry about. Continue talking to him as a friend. But, if that feels like something that you can't handle because your emotions are too invested, then I would cut this off. The reality of this situation is that he is an adult and legally, you are not. There are legal repercussions that he could face for being involved with a minor. Eventually, this person could face real trouble. This would be true even if you were 15.

Now, it is not illegal for a 15 and 20 year old to have a relationship with no sexual relations. Flirting is not a crime. So, when he says that he will "wait," he is implying sex because that is the only thing that will get him into trouble. I know that you've spoken to him on the phone and all of that. However, I went to college and I know what happens at his age. It's actually quite gross how guys can be. Men don't mature very quickly. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if you were more mature than he is. Are you willing to go through all of these emotions that you just described for someone who might be hooking up with other girls and talking to other women the same way he talks to you? I'm not saying that this is happening for sure. There are lots of great guys out there and he might just be one of them. But, if he is, then he would be okay with talking to you as a friend.

My advice to you would be to continue a friendship if you feel that you can un-invest emotionally. I would also suggest that you don't meet up with him in person for the time being. I hope that you take my advice with all the love in my heart. Like I said, at 13, I would not have liked this advice. But, at 25, I look back and wish that someone had given it to me!!
xoxo

Some movies have a final clip at the end of the credits. Some do not. Typically, and especially with a large group, people leave during the credits. This gives the cleaning crew ample time to pick up before the next group arrives.

Hi there! I'm not sure how old you are. You mentioned that you are a "girl" but you are in love with a "man." This could just be the way we speak, and you may not have noticed it! But, I will provide advice for both occasions.

If you are under the age of 18, I would suggest that you do not pursue someone who is a decade older than you are. It can bring about serious legal repercussions. When I was younger, I had an inability to see how things would effect me in the future. But, as I've seen them unravel, I have had to take that into careful consideration. I had a lot of crushes as a teenager and even as a younger girl (10-12 years old) on guys who were probably in their twenties. But, obviously, it wasn't something I pursued. I just enjoyed having a crush on someone, as most young girls do. If this is the case, I would suggest you do the same.

If you are an adult, I would consider that you take a clear look at the situation from the perspective of this person. If he is asexual, he does not have the ability to be sexually attracted to someone. Are you prepared to live with that? Just because a person is asexual doesn't mean that they don't want to have a meaningful relationship. Would you be willing to have a meaningful, emotional relationship... without the sex? You should explore these feelings and ponder upon what you are willing to give up and what you are not. If sex is not important to you and you desire the emotional aspect of the relationship, perhaps you can come forward with your feelings and relay that to this guy. If you are not, then, you should consider how you will move on.

I agree very much with adviceman. I am a teacher, myself, aspiring to be a school counselor, so I hope I can provide some perspective. Ideally, at 12, she should be getting 8-9 hours of sleep. Some children need more. During the school year, if she wakes up at 6:00am, I would suggest 9:30 as an appropriate bedtime for her age and sleep requirements. I think this is reasonable because as adviceman said, it provides sufficient time for after school activities and homework. Bedtime should be a time to decompress, not to bring on more stress. If the bedtime is so strictly enforced at 8:30, this can bring on added stress. As for the 9 year old, I would say that 8:30 is appropriate for the time being, and should be increased gradually (like maybe by half an hour) as he grows up. So, next year, maybe increase it to 9, so that when he is 12, they will have the same bedtime and it is fair. It also won't be too big a shock on the body to lose a whole hour of sleep. Hope this was helpful.

I started this column when I was 15 years old, so you'll notice that the advice has gotten better and better. I've always been interested in counseling and I started this column to gain experience. But, I found a lot more than that. I found a support system of caring and loving people. I received a degree in child development and currently working towards becoming a school psychologist. So, I hope you can feel confident in trusting me with your questions. This is more than just a fun site for me. I look back on my own questions from years ago, and I laugh when I read about my problems at 16. I've really come a long way! I'm relatively young, but I've had several experiences in life that have aided me in helping others. I hope to use those experiences for the greater good and help others who are not in their ideal situation!

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