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Everybody at school hates me and I don't have any friends...
Hi, I'm a 14 year old girl who will be a sophomore in HS in the fall. I honestly think that I wasn't meant to have friends. As long as I can remember, even back in kindergarten, I've been bullied. Growing up, I would get invited to birthday parties by the parents, but when I got there the kid would say they didn't want me there. :( I've had years where I would come home and cry for hours every day because I was so miserable. Fast forward to the present. Everyone at my high school is so shallow that it drives me insane. Don't tell me to join clubs to meet new people, because my school has 300 people and everyone is exactly the same. I had a lunch table of people that I sat with this year, but I have nothing in common with them. They barely said anything to me at all this entire year. People think that I'm a nerd. I get straight A's without even trying because I've basically given up on myself. Plus, everyone likes to pick on me because I'm younger (in my town for some reason, freshmen are sixteen years old, but I was thirteen). I really hate my life. I WANT to be able to go out and have fun with friends, go on dates (I've never had a boyfriend and probably will never have one), and do stuff, but I'm just so depressed. I don't even feel fulfilled doing the things I used to like doing. My entire life revolves around regurgitating A grades to keep my parents happy. I don't want to live like this... Last year I started cutting but it didn't make me feel better. Thanks for reading this far. Help....
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Hey I'm 15 and I'm gonna be a sophomore this year too. I have 3 best friends now but I used to be terribly bullied about being super smart and being a "good girl". Guys and girls in my class would call me names and make fun of my clothes and call me ugly. It was terrible. I went through a point that I just didn't want to live anymore and it sucked. I thought I'm just a waste of space. The kids also told me I was chubby and I developed an eating disorder that I still have to deal with today. It's weird cuz after I reached highschool I kinda became popular and guys were all over me but inside I still felt insecure. Things people say can really hurt but honestly it does get better. If you need a friend I am here if u want to talk anytime. Girls will be mean and they are probably just jealous that you are smart and are gonna be something when you grow up.
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It's honestly rare to find real "friends" in high school. Most friendships developed as a kid are mainly out of location and convenience. Ya know, "Oh well, you're here and I'm here, and you're rich and I'm rich, and we're both pretty, so let's be friends." That's not even hardly the definition of a real friend. I never seemed to fit in either. I appeared to have lots of friends, my facebook page was very popular, but when I really thought about it, I still felt completely alone. All of my "friends" wouldn't really go to the ends of the Earth for me or love me unconditionally. And knowing that, makes the journey that much harder, because you don't take any of the relationships in your life serious. You won't know what it is to have a real friend until you have one, and then no one else will measure up. But trust me, being that way can make life a lot more lonely and difficult, but it's also a key sign that you're different. You stand out. You're capable of seeing past your pretty clothes and fancy car. And in the long run, you'll be a well rounded person. So I'm not saying stick your nose out to everyone else because you think you know more, but don't feel discouraged when others won't give you the time of day because, really, it's a friendship that THEY missed out on, not you.
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Don't let these people get to you. Obviously none of them are worth your time and you just havent found the right person or people that are good enough to be friends with you yet. The truth of it is is that a lot of people are shallow and jerks and its right of you to not surround yourself with those types of people. What you need to do is just relax and stay positive. Everything happens for a reason and maybe this is suppose to a learning experience for you..(okay now wait just keep reading, this might not be total crap just stay with me)..this could be the time for you to really get to know yourself, try new things and become your own bestfriend. I know it'll be hard and theres always gonna be that desire to be with people and experience those things you do with friends as a teenager.. I know, I'm 15 years old and I'm alone most of the time with few friends and I dont really get to experience those things either. So dont feel alone and miserable. Stay positive and use this oppurtunity to become your best friend, build up your self confidence by focusing on the positive things about yourself and trying to improve or change the things you dislike. Don't let other people get to you because theyre not worth it and dont change for other people. Be yourself, be confident and try new things, experience things on your own. Go out for a walk, take in all the beauty around you, exercise, learn about new things, listen to music and sing and dance your heart out. Write about your feelings, draw, do photography, volunteer somewhere, pray, cook, just live and be you and enjoy life, you dont need those assholes to be happy. If you be you and love yourself and are confident, youll attract the right people into your life and will find someone. Itll be okay and if you ever need to talk, you can inbox me, ill always be there to listen. So yeah I hope this helped, stay strong!
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Everyone else had great advice.
I think your problem right now is your self esteem because of your friend issue. If these people at your school are so shallow, you don't need them.
What are your interests?
I think if you actually are looking for friends, that's where you start. It doesn't have to be in school, there should be places around that have things you can do and you can meet people there. Like dancing, martial arts, ceramics, ect. Just look around, look online and see if there is anything you'd be interested in.
If you're not happy doing the things you used to like doing, then that means it's time to try new things. So if something sounds interesting, then do it. Don't start thinking you can't, because then you'll never get out there.
Just start doing things for yourself and the right people will come into your life.
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Hi there! Actually, the two previous users have already answered your question but i'm just going to pour forth some of my opinions. You see, life is never easy. People out there may be lavished with fun and all but sometimes, trials and tribulations befall you so that you can learn to survive. You are an A student, that's brilliant for a 14 y/o student but based on your problems, maybe all you need is a fresh start for you've been living in the dark phase for so long. Excelling in studies is good but that's not what your life is entirely about.
Start thinking for you, doing things for your ownself and look at your special-ties. I've been through your experience for years, so you really, really need to be patient. Find, pursue other things that can develop into a better you so that things can start to change slowly but steadily. Believe me, if you keep on feeling down because you think you're never going to be happy, then never will you be. Take a moment and think very hard on what you need to do because you're not living for nothing, He has created you for a reason. If He has so willed, He would've taken your life a minute ago.
Regarding your friends, don't worry too much. Try being friendlier to everyone else without changing your good personality. If they're just different, and not in a good way, then you're better off alone. Your schoolmates can hate you all they want, but they can never take away the good in you, right? Start living for yourself. You do deserve a great friend, and he or she is out there somewhere.. You just need to look at the right place. For the time being, try being independent for a moment to give yourself some space to change. Think of solutions, try altering your negative thoughts to postive ones.Fill the empty spots in your mind. I understand the reason why you cut yourself, but perhaps it's time for you to love yourself and make a firm stand. No matter what, at the end of the day, either you alone can be your best friend and your worst enemy. You've the courage to be alone, so hold on to yourself first before doing the same to others. Read this one poem - 'IF' by Rudyard Kipling.
Anything, you can just tell me. May peace be upon you :)
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I'm 18 and am the same as you-except the boyfriend thing.
Trust me, work hard now, play hard later.
Chin up-keep getting good grades. Then you can go to a good uni with people who are exactly like yourself. I know its hard-and you are not alone in this.
Yes they may be having fun now-but something will give in that they may not be getting the grades they need.
Its about having a healthy balance. Take up a new hobby and make friends with that. I have a hunch that people at your school arn't even worthy of your friendship. Because you're in a different league.
Keep smiling, except little from people but stay positive and this lonely teenage phase of your life will be over soon I promise. When you go to Uni, your past does not matter and you can make a fresh start. At least thats what I'm telling myself this September :)
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Okay you just said the key. You make straight A's. They are just jelalous because they probably can't reach you in life and stuff like that. Don't beat yourself on this. Try to ignore them. People like that will not get no where in life. Im a nerd too, a a bunch of people use to pick on me because they weren't half the smart that i am. So try to find that one person that you think you can relate to. Please do not try to KILL YOURSELF ON THIS PLEASE. FOR ME;-)
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