|
humorist-workshop
The little girl I babysit might have an eating disorder
Hello Advicenators! It's been an extremely long time since I've been on this website, I'm so glad it's still running. You guys are awesome.
I came here because I was unsure who to talk to about this. Before I moved away to college, I babysat for this little girl, we'll call her Lauren, for a year. I would drive her to her dance classes and take her home, cook her dinner, and just hang around with her. Right before I was suppose to leave for college, something happened with her family. Her parents got a divorce, and then a couple weeks later, her father went to jail. The mother told me not to mention it to Lauren so it wouldn't upset her. The father got out on bail. And then, I went off to college.
I've been back on summer break (I'm 19 years old) and today was my first time babysitting for Lauren again. When I picked her up from school, I felt like I was going to break her in half when I hugged her. She looks extremely skinny. I could see her knee bones through her legs, and her arms were so tiny. I immediately became worried. This girl is 10 years old. Her parents are in the middle of a custody battle according to her mother, and Lauren told me that her cat just ran away a couple weeks ago. Lauren now lives with her mother and her two older brothers. She also is an avid dancer. She has been dancing since she was 4 years old and takes dance classes every day.
I'm nervous for Lauren because there are a lot of things in her life that could influence an eating disorder, such as how intense of a dancer she is, her pet running away, and what her parents are going through. I feel like I'm in a position that could help her because a) I have known her for such a long time and b) am also a dancer. I really want to help her but I am unsure of what to do.
Thank you for reading this long story. I would love some help from you advicenators!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Illnesses?
i think your friend is suffering from anorexia nervosa.in ordinary dieting there is craving for high calorie foods.consult a doctor and check her renal function test ,weight,bp,pulse food intake and attitude to food and weight gain.mostly in less severe cases it resolve with time,encouragement and support
]
Just be there for her, make her feel appreciated so she can open up to you (in case she is holding something inside of her). Be a friend and a big sister to her, that you are there to listen to her. She may need somebody that would make her feel loved, understood and not judgmental of her, somebody that truly cares (and maybe right now she don't feel she's getting all of that from her family). You could be the family she can count on, or her hero...so just be there for her...she will love you and open up to you.
She may be confused at this time and she needs a hero and that could be you. Enjoy each others friendship.
]
I agree with the other responses. She may be depressed. Depression can cause loss of appetite. Unless you see disordered behaviors around food, she is probably suffering from depression and not an eating disorder.
]
Razhie gave you good advice. I will only add that if you are still making her dinner, watch how and what she eats. Keep an eye on her to make sure she isn't purging afterwards.
If she is refusing to eat then you need to speak with her mother. See what she has to say, see how long this has been going on. This loss of weight could be tied to her dancing or it could be from the stress of the custody battle.
If it is from the strss of the custody battle she needs to see her doctor for medical intervention. Children do suffer stress disorders an doctors can help them. Parents don't always believe children this young suffer stress. Custody battles can go on for years something this child cannot and should not be made to tolerate.
If weight loss has to do with dancing then it may be an eating disorder. Mom may be forcing her to eat but not aware that she is purging afterwards. That's why I asked you to keep an eye out for that. Lauren may even trust you enough to confied in you that she is purging. If so her mom needs to know so that medical intervention can be gotten.
Should mom feel this is just the result of the custody battle and will fun its course. You have every right to contact child social services.
]
You are making a bit too much of a leap here.
An eating disorder is certainly a possibility. She is under a lot of the kinds of pressure that could push her that way - but one hug isn't quite enough to make a call. Stress can absolutely effect diet and weight loss, even in children, and there are also common medications that can make weight gain very difficult for a young person her age.
The best thing you can do, especially if you are going to keep baby sitting for her, is pay attention and talk to her. You've got an easy in as a fellow dancer to talk to her about how important it is to eat healthy and get enough energy to fuel you. If her answers or her eating behaviors concern you have a few days with her, talk to her mother about your concerns.
]
More Questions: |