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My parents won't listen to me!
16/f
My parents will NOT listen to anything I say. They told me my curfew is at 8, right, and I told them that I needed it to be at 9 or 10 because of stuff I want to do and they totally IGNORED me! Then I told them I wanted to go to the beach this summer with my friend and her bf because they're old enough and her parents let her but my parents were like, "No, you'll get into trouble!" and this crap about how a 16 year old girl shouldn't be away from her parents like that. I told them it would make me HAPPY to go to the beach w/them and they were like we'll they would schedule a time to go to the beach as a family and that is NOT what I said! This is stupid because I'm almost grown up and they should let me do what I want to do and be an adult like that. I mean this is just stupid. Everything I tell them I want to do they pull some crap like if there's a party then they want to know the SPECIFIC names of adults that are going to be there and they want to know if drinking is involved and I tell them I can handle myself and that I'm a woman already and they just won't listen. How can I make my parents listen to me and do what I want them to do?
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I agree with a lot of what the other poster said. You may be 16, and be gaining experience and a sense of responsibility, but you're still at a very easily targeted age, statistically.
My parents are somewhat over protective, but have loosened up a little now that I've been away at college and haven't failed/gotten attacked/become pregnant, haha.
Try to remember to look at it from their perspective, they just don't want anything bad happening to you.
However, to deal with the curfew issue, I highly recommend putting your reasoning and debating skills to good use. Just telling them "I have stuff I want to do" is likely to be met with impassiveness.
Explain to them which friends you'd like to be hanging out with past curfew, what you'll be doing. Pull out examples of how responsible you've been in the past when left alone. Maybe try to bargain, suggest that you could pick up a few more chores if they let you stay out late a certain number of days a week.
Some parents don't respond well to bargaining, I don't know what yours are like. And don't press the issue too hard too often, or it might just lead to difficulties.
Good luck. And if they don't extend your curfew, just take it as a challenge to have a lot more fun in the short time you have after school (safely. ^_^; )
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You have reached the time of life when you now posess this beautiful womans body. You want to try new things and meet new people as well as have new experiences. It seems like everyone else has more freedom than you. If they do it is probably because their parents care less about them or just don't have the time to keep track of them. You have no idea how vulnerable you are at this point. You are like low hanging fruit to those who want sex or to ply you with drugs. Driving around with strangers becomes a real threat to your safety and you are completely unaware of the consequences because you just want to have fun. At this point you have one option only as I see it. Whatever activities you have planned will have to be presented to your parents logically. What safeguards are in place. Who will be there to protect you that they trust? What assurances can you give them that they can call you at a moments notice to see how you are doing. Where will you be and when will you be there?
From their side you have to keep in mind they have invested 17 years in your care so far (including the 9 months your Mom carried you) and they are not about to let all their efforts be spoiled by some creep in the back seat of a car or a drink passed to you that contains a date rape drug or worse. They see all the dangers and you see all the things you could miss out on. If your plans are reasonable safe and well presented you'll find more freedom but if you are just out to defy their authority then you're in for some really unhappy times. You have an entire lifetime ahead of you to do all the things you want. The person you will be by age 21 is going to be far different than you might think. I hope you make the right decisions here because your whole future can be ruined by one night of indulgence. Good luck!
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You live with your parents, you follow there rules.
You are 16 years old, your not 18, your not 21. Your not a legal adult.
When you have your own bills to pay, your own car, your own house, then you can make your own decisions.
You honestly just sound so immature right now that its no surprise that they want to know everything your doing. Its not unreasonable for a parent to want to know where your going, and who your going with.
10 o clock is not a time that a 16 year old should be out. You may not think it, but its dangerous out there. People get raped and kidnapped every day.
And if drinking is involved with something you sure as hell should not be there. Your going to get taken advantage of one day, and your parents are going to tell you they told you so. Your not a women, your a child.
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What a horrible situation to find yourself in! You have the terrible misfortune to have parents who still care about you and who don't want to see you screw up your life.
The nerve of your parents, "pulling some crap" on you whenever you want to do something, and wanting to know the details of where you will be and who you will be with!
One might even think these people dared to love you!
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You can't 'make' your parents do anything. You say you're 'almost' grown up. Note the 'almost'... until you are paying your own bills, living on your own, you're not an adult and you have to follow your parents' rules.
Your parents are being involved. They want you to be safe. That's what these rules are for. Just because you think you know everything about the way the world works doesn't mean that you actually do. Remember that they were your age once, and they know what kind of trouble someone who's 16 and given free rein can get into.
If you want your parents to treat you like an adult, start acting like one. You're not entitled to go to the beach, or to stay out past 8. You don't NEED to. Try following their rules to the letter, no complaining. Do this for a while. Could take a long time, might not. Show them that you can be mature and responsible, and they might ease up on you.
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Parents can be frustrating. When I was your age my Mother was very strict. We fought day in and day out. All I wanted to do was hang out with my friends, have the same rules as their parents gave them. I got so rebellious that at the age of 17 I moved in with my Boyfriend and his parents. I had finally gotten my freedom at last. It was great in the begining. However 4 years of this life style led to really bad life choices. By the time I was 22 I had two children , My once super fun boyfriend turned into a Beating, Cheating drug dealer. And all those people I got to hang out late with were all dead beats. I got out of all of this and tucked my tail between my legs and went back home. 4 of what should have been my best years were over. No college, two jobs and two children. I still fought with my mother and hated the rules but I slowly started to comply for the sake of my children and my father. Now that I have teenagers I try to be careful not to become my mother, however I get where she was coming from on a lot of issues. My methods for raising my children are different yet I want to guide them in the best direction I can. You can not change your parents and I know first hand how much it can feel like a life sentence when they are strict. Just do yourself a favor and try to listen. The less you buck up to them the more respect they will give you. Which comes with more freedom. If you play your cards right you will be in college in a few years and you can cut loose with everyone else. It will be worth the wait and your patients.
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