|
sexual intercourse?
alright i am a 16 year old girl turning 17 next month going into my senior year, i feel like everyone in my grade has had sex, i feel a lot of girls feel so nonchalant about it all. I have had a boyfriend and i personally don't think i am ugly, i have never had sex before and i haven't met the right guy i feel i could do that with but i feel kind of insecure i feel that i should of had sex already considering im almost going to college i feel kind of like a loser i don't know i just wanna hear your thoughts on this & what i should do? please no hateful comments :)
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I'm in the same boat as you. Trust me, if you're not comfortable with having sex just yet. DON'T DO IT. I'm 16 and I'm going to be a junior, but most of my friends are younger than me and have had sex already. Personally I feel they've made a huge mistake. I'm waiting until I meet the right guy, and have been dating him for a while. I don't think it's worth throwing away your virginity for some guy you're going to talk to for a few months, have sex and then don't talk at all.
Sometimes I feel like I should've had sex already too, just because everyone else has. I know I'm not ugly, I've had boyfriends, but it just makes me feel kinda lame and out of the loop. But actually in reality, I'm proud to say I'm a virgin. And you should be too! There's not reason for you to lose your virginity just yet. And you still have many years ahead of you to worry about having sex. Right now you should be focused on bigger things in your future, not just who's going to be entering your body.
Just stay strong and do what YOU want to do. Don't let anyone influence you otherwise. It's your life, live it to the fullest, but do what you want to do, not what everyone else is doing. Hope this helped ! Have fun :)
]
Personality I wouldn't go for that trend. You wouldn't believe how many people make up lies to fit with the crowd but don't actually go along with it. I would say you lying about it is better than doing it. What if you got pregnant while trying to fit in? You'll fit OUT!
And the number one thing I tell others is: if you're too embarrassed to go buy a condom on your own, then you're not ready for sex.
]
I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you may have received and may continue to receive from others.
I found the following website while answering a very similar question for other young ladies. I believe you should review this website before making any decision about having sex, starting with “Am I ready?”
On the subject of are you ready: all I will say is sexual intercourse is a beautiful thing between two loving responsible people. At your age sex for you as a woman is different than fore the boy. At 16 you are more emotionally mature than a partner would at the same age by about 2 years. Sex for a woman most always have a loving relationship, meaning women usually do not hop in and out of bed. Where for a boy of the same age sex is more of a conquest, away to satisfy raging hormones.
The odds are against you marring the boy you give your virginity to, so be selective as to who you chose to be your first. Make sure you find someplace you can have your first sexual experience that is safe, relaxing and that you will be undisturbed. You should be on birth control for at least 30 days and always use a condom.
As someone who is old enough to be your grandparent I should be telling you to wait. I am sure your parents have already given you that advice and it is good advice. It is also hypocritical of most of us as most all of us my age and younger engaged in sex long before we were married. What I will say is there are ways of satisfying the sexual urge without having intercourse. There is masturbation, mutual masturbation, which is generally apart of foreplay, BJ’s and HJ’s. These forms of sex should be adequate for now to satisfy both you and your boyfriend without running the possibility of an unwanted pregnancy. Remember no birth control is 100% effective. End of lecture.
Before you make your decision please review the following website.
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location).
]
Once you've had sex, you will never regret all the times you didn't have it. Only people who treat sex like a numbers game and count every missed opportunity as a missed "score" regret it.
Also, more people lie about not being virgins than you think.
]
Well that is good you said you are waiting for the right guy , and that is a good start , good job. Do not rush anything , it is sex , that is something that no one should rush into or feel like a loser for not doing it, in fact your the winner because your taking your time to wait and wait for the right guy if not possibly to marriage , to someone you really enjoy being around and happy. I am really glad you are asking and seeing , but do not care what other people think , as long as you are happy. My advice to you is I think you should wait , your not missing out on anything , just wait for the right man or marriage , do not feel like a loser , your far way beyond that. Feel so secure because you are doing the good choice.
Good luck girl : )
- Keep it up , do not waste your treasure
]
Girl, relax :) In reality, there is probably only a handful of people who have actually had sex, rather than a bunch of people that claim they have just to feel cool. And to be honest, some of them who have had sex may regret it because it wasn't with someone they actually love.
There is no reason to have sex with a guy you date in high school, especially if you date him simply because he's available and fun for the time being. Enjoy being young, enjoy being innocent. Think about how much less stressful it is to not be sexually active at this age. You won't have to constantly worry if you may have gotten pregnant. You won't have to worry about getting money, supporting a child, missing out on awesome opportunities. You have so much ahead of you in life, much greater things than meaningless sex with a high school boyfriend.
I have nothing against sex what so ever, so I'm not speaking to promote prudence. I support sex in loving relationships. So, if you are in love with someone, and in a comfortable, stable, and loving relationship, AND you feel ready, then sex may only benefit your feelings.
But, if having sex is more like something to do on your How-To-Be-Cool-List, then hold off. The time will come when the time comes. For now, be young, be fun, love. :)
]
i'm 18 in college already and i'm still a virgin. there's no need to be in a rush to give it away to someone that doesn't even deserve it.
]
I can assure you, everyone in your school is not having sex. Everyone wants to have everyone else think they are experienced and desirable, but an awful lot of people are pretending or, like the previous person giving advice, they had one very unsatisfying experience they now regret to "get it over with".
Sex is wonderful, shared with someone you love who also loves you, not just someone whose willing to do it when you're willing to get it over with. Stay true to yourself and wait for that right guy,IMHO, the guy you are going to marry.
Take time to read:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
]
People may boast about it but it's highly unlikely that 'everyone' in your grade has had sex. I've left school now and plenty of my friends haven't yet. It's really not a big deal.
There are so many people who regret the circumstances under which and the person with whom they lost their virginity, I know I do. It's much better to remain a virgin until you meet someone who you want to sleep with than to do it with anyone just to get it out of the way and regret it for the rest of your life. I lost mine at 16 with a stranger because I wanted to get it out of the way. I'm now 18 and regret it big time. It upsets me that I could have had a special moment with someone I genuinely cared about but I gave that up so I'd feel cool. It didn't make me look or feel cool at all and as I mentioned before, plenty of my friends are still virgins and they're not viewed as 'losers'.
So what do I think you should do? Nothing at all. Eventually you'll meet someone who you have mutual trust and affection for. Until then, it really isn't worth stressing over.
If you're embarassed about telling your friends you're a virgin (which you really shouldn't be) then just skirt around the subject if it comes up in conversation. It isn't anyone's business but your own.
]
More Questions: |