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Mom on Facebook
Okay so my mom and i have always had a semi-close relationship. But she just got a facebook... and she wants me to be her friend on it. I have no problem with the fact she got a facebook, but i kind of need my personal space when it comes to these things. I dont want her to read what i say to my friends and such.... its not that they're bad. It's just that i'm really uncomfortable with it. I told her all of this and she's making me feel extremely guilty, and telling me that i'm SUCH a good daughter for not accepting (sarcasm).
So i really don't know what do do.
Am i horrible for doing this?
What do you guys think?
15/f
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
I have my mom and other family members as friends on Facebook but then again, I live 2000 miles away from all of them.
Only add your mother if you want to. If you don't want to then don't. Your personal life and your home life are 2 completely different things. Don't feel pressured to do something.
Your mom should be warning you about peer pressure, not contributing to it. :(
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I think she is just teasing you. Do you really think she's serious? Just tell her what you said right there.
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I have a solution. Accept her friend request but you know you have the option of letting certain people not see aspects of your profile? You can just make it limited to her but still be her friend. Like, block the pictures/videos/wall/info part, whatever you need to.
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I would walk up to her, and say "Mom, are you really going to be melodramatic over facebook? Aren't I supposed to be the one who acts like a 12 year old and you tell me to chill out, its just facebook?"
You have every right to your space. You should be able to tell her "Mom, these are my friends, you are my mother. These two things are not the same."
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I don't see a problem with you not adding her.
It took me a few weeks before I accepted my mom, aunts, and such on facebook.
It never really crossed my mind that they'd be "facebook stalking" because most of them aren't great with the computer. However, the second my mom commented one of my pictures, she went straight to the "Limited Profile" section of my facebook, as did a few other adults I have as friends.
Don't get me wrong, I care about each of these people, and it's not like I have pictures of me drinking or doing drugs or anything, but it's just one of those things that they don't really need to see... I like my privacy, and I don't add people I don't know, etc. I enjoy my facebook being something for me and my friends, and it kind of bothers me that they stopped allowing only college kids on.
I'm cool with them letting high school kids on because that's not as big of a deal, but it used to be a college thing, and it's kind of a shame that they stopped doing that.
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i'm fifteen with a mom, and a stepdad on facebook
accept her little friend request, give her that much
then adjust your privacy settings so she can't see anything. it works for me!
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I don't see anything wrong with it. And if it is wrong, I don't care. I rejected both my parents. Like you said, it's not like I'm making drug deals via wall posts; I just don't feel like it's necessary to blend family life with social life.
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I don't think you're horrible for not wanting to be friends on facebook with her. My friends think it's weird that my mom and I are facebook friends.
However, if you can't reason with her and make her see your side, there's the option of limited profile. Unless she's already tech savvy, and especially facebook savvy, she's not likely to figure out that other people can see more of your profile than she can. And, once she figures that out, maybe she'll have had some time to think about why you'd limit what she can see and she'll be easier to reason with/she'll see the reason behind your choice.
I also agree with the first answer: ask her if she really wants to know/see what your friends say on facebook. And if she does, then ask why.
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I know what this feels like because I've got aunts and friend's parents with Facebook.
You've already explained to your mum that you don't feel comfortable having her as a friend on Facebook which is brilliant. The next time she brings it up, make it clear that it's not because you're embarassed of her or trying to hide anything but that you need to have some privacy. Ask her if she would be happy with you seeing everything that goes on in her life and the conversations she has with her friends.
You've got a good relationship with her, I'm sure that eventually she'll either drop it or understand your reasons.
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