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Cheated


Question Posted Wednesday July 2 2008, 5:08 pm

Hi, ive been with my boyfriend for a year and a half and a few days ago his friend got on the phone calling me nasty names.

and i figured out my boyfriend got wasted and madeout with another girl.


i love him but i dont trust him.

i am misrable without him. should i give him another chance?


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TheGivingTree answered Thursday July 3 2008, 2:13 pm:
"you figured out" that he made out with another girl?

does this mean he did not tell you himself? if that is the case, then he does not deserve to be forgiven because he has not learned anything.

if he was the one to tell you, then you just have to ask yourself if you are ready to forgive him. if you only want to forgive him to stay in the relationship, it will haunt you. sometimes bad boyfriends are like infected legs.. sometimes you just need to cut your losses before it consumes all of you.

PS- if you do decide to forgive him.. "another chance" = one other chance. just one. promise yourself that and don't ever break it.

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goodfriendbestadvice answered Wednesday July 2 2008, 10:57 pm:
i agree with below about that it is your decision. but like said once a cheater always cheater. most of the time, some people change, but very few. if he called you names like that, he obviously isn't respecting you, and you deserve to be respected. put you first. and although it may be horrible to break up with him, give yourself a week of romance movies, and a tub of ben and jerrys and treating your self to a day at the spa, and you'll be just fine.

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ccupcake07 answered Wednesday July 2 2008, 9:19 pm:
I've always heard "once a cheater, always a cheater." I've never been cheated on but it's up to you. It really depends on the guy. You are in a tough decision. If you are really happy with him then i would give him another chance. But trust is a REALLY big thing in relationships and if you can't trust your mate, then it isn't a good relationship...Hope this helps! Good luck!

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loved212121 answered Wednesday July 2 2008, 7:54 pm:
well if it was me i wouldnt cause if they cheat once they are gonna do it again also you can check out a great book its called "he's just not that into you" it can help you with all your relationship problems

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kc answered Wednesday July 2 2008, 6:22 pm:
Weird, I just went through the same exact situation. My guy got wasted and made out with this girl he used to date, and who I hated a lot.

I gave my boyfriend another chance because he was honest about it, and it could have been worse. He could have done it sober and he could have gone farther with this girl.

In my experience, things have not been the same since. The spark that was originially between us is gone and I still do not trust him all that much. I have been contemplating on if we should stay together or not because of these feelings. He was extremely sorry about doing it and made it clear he would never do something like that again, but how could you be so sure with an 18 year old boy?

If you feel as if you guys could work things out, and he seems like he regrets it, then if you feel it will make you happy, then you can give him another chance. Remember, this is not about what you WANT, this is about if it is good for you in the long run and what will make you happy.

If you do give him another chance, set boundaries. He is not allowed to talk to this girl again, and whenever he goes out to drink he should tell you. If he was truely sorry, he would understand your decision and do whatever it takes to win your trust back.

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thelaura answered Wednesday July 2 2008, 6:13 pm:
The best advice is to seriously follow your own heart.
People make crap mistakes, which is why I, personally believe, everyone deserves a second chance.
If it's meant to be, you'll work through it.

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LOL_x0x answered Wednesday July 2 2008, 6:02 pm:
We really can't make your decision for you. You have to decide on your own if you think he deserves another chance. There are both positives and negatives.


Positive: He was honest about it...or at least, it seems like he was from how you worded your question.
Negative: He cheated [duh?].
Positive: He only madeout, I know it's horrible, but at least he didn't go all the way.
Negative: He did it at all...thoguh he was "wasted". I am by no means siding with your boyfriend here, but it would've been worse if he were sober.


You should talk to him about it, and see if he wants another chance. If he does, take some time to think about it. You'll figure out what you need to do =]


-Laura. (16-f)

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Stacyy answered Wednesday July 2 2008, 5:46 pm:
Whats meant to be will be.
Let him go and see if he comes back.
If he does he truley loves you.
Really my personal opinion is it was a drunken thing that wont happen again.
I hope this works out for you.
:)

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