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Goody goody ready to change
So I'm pretty much the most good goody you have ever seen. I'm 16/f. I have a 4.0 GPA. I am chosen to be in senior classes even though I am a shophmore. I do everything when I am suppose to do it and how I am supposed to do it. I have never drank, did drugs, or had sex. But I am so sick of being the same old boring me. All of my friends believe in no sex before marrige. Well now I'm starting to think sex before marrige isn't so bad as long as it's with someone you care about. Well I really want to change into someone who has a little more fun. No drugs though. But will I ruin my reputation? Is it worth the risk to ruin something like that? I am really tore. But I know I'm not one of those who wants to go out every night and get wasted. I just want to live some of my high school years in fun. It's not like I'm a dork either. I was prom queen my freshman year. I was homecoming attendant our first year. I'm "popular" I guess you would say. But anyways should I try it? Or should I just stick to the goody goody I am?
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first of all, youve gotta find yourself. once you find yourself, you wont label yourself or worry about reputation. tune into what you TRULY want, who you TRULY are, spend some time becoming confident about the things youre passionate about and who you are as a person, not just what you do. and trust me, live it up! highschool is the best times of our life and youre only 16..it helps to just let go and do what your instinct feels is right..try something new everyday..find a solid group of friends and find fun drug-free things to do with them(my friends and i go to movies & concerts & make short films,etc.) plus popularity is not important! were all dorks inside, im goofy and a dork and im proud. what im trying to say is, this is your life, be who you truly are inside, screw the labels, if you feel you wanna change and loosen up, then you can. it takes time but just..let go! youll always remember these years so make the most of them. and having fun is the best thing in the world, who cares about reputation! what matters is loving yourself and having people youre close with who truly love you for YOU. i know itll take time, but i think your whole life can change if you want it to. happiness and freedom comes from within, its all up to you!
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Don't change who you are trust me you will find that you are that person and there is nothing you can do to change. I have the same problem as you the only diffrence is I'm am a boy. But I tried little things like slacking off a little in school and it just bugged me a lot. I just came to find that this is me and there isnt anything i can do about it. It's ok to be the goody goody I am every day. If you need a strong support system or more advice from me just message me and I will give u some more info about myself, sense were so much alike.
Hoped I helped! ZS
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Ahh, you'd be surprised how many people out there wish they could do everything they're supposed to =].
Will letting yourself loose damage your reputation? Depends how you do it. It's one thing to change your stance on sex before marriage and one day have it with someone out of wedlock, quite another thing to go and do every guy in your grade.
My advice to you would probably to try new things and hang out with different people. Stay within your limits - I'm not suggesting you try drugs because those could actually have consequences you may not enjoy, just things like, get to know someone you don't particularly, join a club/team at school you'd never consider joining. It is possible to try new things and change yourself without risking much.
It's probably a good thing to get out there, experience different things. That's what being a teenager really is about, anyway... Sounds like you're fairly popular, so why not try going out somewhere with newer people? Or plan one of your own parties at your place? I'm not advocating the drugs/sex part of it, you understand, but being more social and exploring different parts of yourself are good. Read some different books, listen to different music, paint a picture... be creative. That kind of stuff. But don't put yourself down for being too good. While you are on your expedition for self exploration, remember always to feel proud of the stuff you have accomplished so far.
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Well. For one.just let loose. a little.tad bit. you shuldnt stay locked away in your good ole days all the time.have a little fun. And im not saying. go out and have sex either.or get wasted.or stoned/high.Just do some parties.every once in a while.hang with your friends more often.and try to find a guy to hang with for time being.guys are alot of fun.and im not talking just friend.hi.bye.im saying.more like.wanna be my boyfriend.maybe sex would come up.but keep your stance.remember.the guy wears the pants in the relationship.but u most certainly CONTROL THE zipper.feel me?
And yes to your question. its okay to have sex wth some one you feel you care about. ust as long as you are protected.you will be fine.and i really doubt that this will ruin your reputation.only you can ruin it if you decide to over due FUN.try not to pu all the partyng and friend and boyfriend in front of your reputation. because who knows could go wrong. and please i beg u to not rush into sex like i did.hope i helpes.
grape™
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My Name is Faye :) 15 and in the last year of my secondary school (in a class of all 16 year olds).
I'm an ambitious all round achiever really... and I'm pretty successful. Geese that sounds boastful but I'm trying to relate this to you I guess :) A year ago I was like you. I stuck to my work and all that but I knew that, although academic values are important, so are social values. To do well in life you NEED to be able to communicate and relate to people - and have fun. Life will be alot more enjoyable if you get out there and live a little. Not to too much of an extent where you forget work of course - but life becomes so much more rewarding when you do a little. You DON'T need drugs, like you say, to have an awesome time. But really - try and get out there and do stuff! It is a good idea. It'll be great for people to see another side to you and you'll find alot of attitudes toward you change, veen when popular, for the better. Getting involved is what makes people connect and its likely to bring all sorts of opportunities. A year on from deciding to get out there and do stuff, and I'm in a strong relationship with a boy I love - and I've met all kinds of new people who have given me new, fun experiences (perhaps with a bit of alcohol... but not too much, and this has only happened three or four times in the year...). None of them distract me from my work or anything - none of them have changed me. But now I feel much more valued with my friends and alot closer to people. I also enjoy life alot more... and work too!
More enjoyable social life, more easy it is to work instead of loading it all on.
Hope I Helped
Faye
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Drinking does not make you have more fun. Doing drugs does not make you have more fun. There is nothing wrong with being a good student and having good grades. Having fun comes from people's personalitites and it's up to you on how you chose to enjoy yourself. Why would you want to do any of those things just because you don't want to be "safe" all the time. Who are you trying to impress? I'm not trying to seem rude but I honestly think it's patehtic how you're trying to change who you are to be doing what everyone else is. There are plenty of other things you can do to have fun. You have to think about what you're doing before it's too late. I'm sure that you don't want to ruin things while it's going good for you. Sex before marriage is totally up to you. If you are okay with it as long as you're with someone you care about, then fine but don't listen to other people's outputs on it. I personaly don't think it's worth risking everything you've worked hard on just to have some fun drinking. It may seem fun or cool because your friends or people around you do it, but you don't have to put yourself in that situation.. ya know? Keep being how you are and don't change for the worse. You're only sixteen and there will be PLENTY of time for you to grow up and expirience alcohol. Just be more outgoing and enjoy life as you can. Don't ruin it by doing something stupid or you might regret it.
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Let me fist say, I commend your celibacy and the fact you take a stance against underage drinking. Those are all things to be proud of. There are plenty of things to do without drinking or having sex. I never was 'wild' either growing up. If you do have sex. As I am sure what I am about to say next has been drilled in your head a thousand times, use protection! My advice is to keep on the path you are going and wait until you are twenty one to start drinking and until you are financially responsible to take care of a child. After all that what sex is for, to have children. If you just can't help yourself and want to hang out without drinking, do like I do, go to the local pool hall and shoot a game of pool. Don't know how to play pool? Just ask someone to show you. You may get funny looks and folks thinking "noob" but oh, well! I've done this myself and actually had fun, even though I knew little of the game.
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