|
I complain too much
I wasn't sure where to put this, because it's kind of a weird question. Bear it with me.
I'm a thirteen year-old girl and I'm bringing one of my friends with me on a three week long trip to Europe. She's very nice, low-key, and low-maintinence (sp?), so I'm not really worried about getting sick of her. My problem is, I'm afraid SHE'LL get sick of ME. I guess I tend to complain a lot, and stuff like that, but I really want to get better about that. Does anyone have any tips for becoming more self-aware and complaining less?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Miscellaneous category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Random Weirdos?
Take some time apart from each other. Just every once in a while. Don't be afarid to take time to yourself to just think & be alone.. everyone needs their own time. Good luck & have fun in Europe !
♥ me
]
I had the same problem with my friend! We went on a vacation for only a week and a half and she got sick of me first but then i was sick of her because she was sick of me. But then i came up with the brilliant idea (lol) that we just took a break from eachother a couple times a day. Then it was totally fine. Actually during those time a lot we'd just get really bored and end up cutting our alone time short to hang out so we wouldn't be bored! So just make sure you do your own stuff too and don't rely on her for all the fun! Hope i helped!
]
umm.. just try to be less annoying maybe. Tell her. Think before you act..AbBeY!!
]
If you realize your complaining a lot, just stop and quickly apologize! I used to do that too, and I realized that no one has fun when your whining all the time, and it totally drags the fun right out of things.
I suggest that everytime you catch yourself complaining, you fine yourself a dollar or some amount of money and put it in a jar, and at the end of the month donate the money to a charity, or reward yourself for not thinking negativly and complaining alot anymore!
Also look at life with a positive attitude, it helps A LOT! Because if your happy about things and seeing the bright side of things, you'll just feel better about yourself, and there wont be anything to complain about :)
]
i think that you should just watch yourself, and seriously think about everything you are going to say before you say it. before you go to europe, test yourself to a limit of like only 3 to 5 complaints a day. also, always have something with you that you can do that can take your mind off something you are doing, or lack of doing, and use it. for instance, you could have a pocket sudoku with you at all times. it can challenge you, and give you something to do so you arent sitting around making yourself more vulnerable towards more complaints.
let me know if i helped.
]
Relax and don't worry so much about it. I find the more I worry about something the more it will happen. So don't even think of it as a possibility. Just picture your vacation as being everything you want it to be and don't even let the negative thoughts come into your mind because if you do you can manifest these thoughts and then they will be true. Keep the picture of the vacation you want in your mind at all times and it will be as you want it to be. Your friend already loves you and loves being with you or she wouldn't be going with you. Because you two are different makes it that you two are compatable. Have fun and know you will have the best vacation ever.
Here's a site that will help you with possitive reinforcement:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Namaste!
LULABELLE
]
Well, to answer your question, that is you. I am like that too, I think that if she is your true friend she would love you just the way you are without you having to change yourself. I mean maybe she thinks she is too qiet and maybe she thinks you would get sick of her. Lol i think everything will be cool and i wouldnt worry about it if i were you!
i hope i helped.
mts*
]
I think you are currently more self-aware than you are giving yourself credit for. By asking this question you are showing that you are aware of how you behave and how it might irritate others, and that's a really positive and mature thing to be doing.
As you are already aware of what you think issues might be, you can work on them. You've probably formed habbits that are quite difficult to break, but this is possible - try, for example, forcing yourself to count to five or ten before you you say something like a complaint, asking yourself whether what you are saying is going to be productive in the conversation before responding, or forcing yourself to let one other person voice their opinion on the subject so you have time to think before giving an instant reaction which might be a complaint.
A lot of the work is just in forcing yourself to stop and think for a second before you speak or instinctively react - if you can get a hold of that, then you'll probably find that once you've remembered that your trying not to whine so much you'll be able to stop, because as soon as you think about it you realise that it's probably annoying and unnecessary.
This will probably take a bit of time to get into though, and you are likely to slip into old habbits occasionally - you are only human, after all. I think for that reason it's important to say to your friend that you are aware that you might be irritating, that you are working on things and most importantly, that if there is anything you are doing that irritates her that she should bring it up so that you know it bothers her and you can work on it. If you are both honest with each other and work hard at getting along, which you sound like you are more than willing to do, you should be fine together.
It's also important to give yourself some time away from each other. No matter how close you are to a person, if you spend 24 hours a day in each others company for three weeks you will begin to find some of their habbits grating. Try to have a little bit of alone time each day so that if you are irritating each other you get a bit of space from it and can get some perspective, and enjoy the time that you are spending together more,
Enjoy your holiday, and good luck with your friend.
]
More Questions: |