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Growing up?
I feel like lately i've lost a lot of friends for the main point that I don't really care for the things they do... I've always felt older than I actualy am and I can't really get along with most people my age... But I have trouble making friends with older people because they don't take me seriously or give me a chance because I look like i'm a 15 year old "hooligan" i suppose ((i'm 18))... Actualy, I have trouble making friends in general. Anyway, It seems like most of my "friends" have abandoned me and that has kinda made me feel a bit down lately, but the few times i've hung out with them, I just don't feel like I belong anymore. I feel left out. Everytime I feel like I actualy belong somewhere or I feel like I fit in with a group of people, it always turns out that I don't... And it's not like I start a fight or anything of that sort... I just never feel like I belong.
Personaly, and not to sound cockey, but I like my personality and the way I am and i'm not the type to change just so I can fit in with a bunch of kids... But a part of my personality is that I like people and I just get down easily when I'm alone.
There's no direct question, Just want some opinions on any of this or advice.
Thanks.
peAce
18/f
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
if you dont fit in,then just dont. what i mean is instead of feeling like you dont fit in,feel like you stand out. i know that when your having a good time,people will definatly want in,and join you. it doesnt have to start with a big group.it can start with only you and another person. i've felt like i couldn't fit in for a long time,but now i just think of myself as the "weird" one in the group.i was always weird,so i cant complain.think,who are you? define yourself. its good you dont let people change you.that ruins you;if you have a passion go for it. everyone gets sad when there alone to much. good luck!
xkisakissx
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I PERSONALLY THINK THATS GOLD. THE WAY YOU DONT WANT TO CHANGE JUST TO FIT IN. THATS REALLY COOL. SOMEDAY YOULL FIND SOMEONE LIKE YOURSELF. JUST TALK TO A LOT OF PEOPLE AND YOULL FIND YOUR FRIEND.
PS: have you read the outsiders? thats a great book. or maybe youve read the poem "nothing gold can stay" thats where i got stay gold from.
STAY GOLD!!!DOM
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Aww I know how that feels, people change, and they lose touch, its normal.
I think that you will find some people who will accept you for who you are, and you probably are more mature than most people your age.
Try getting to know people at a job you like, or go to a coffee shop, or a local show of music that interests you, you are bound to find people there :)
I just really like how you wrote this, it was personal, without asking a specific question :)
<33
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That's kind of the same with me. Except I'm 14 and I hang out with people in college. o_o;;
Everyone says I'm too mature for my age, and yeah, it's definately true. Even all the adults I know say it x_x; It really sucks, because you just want to fit in but you can't. I mean I only know about 5 people in college, so that's about just FIVE good friends. Ever since I was little I used to hang out with older people so that's why I think I'm like this.
ANYWAY, my point is, you just have to keep trying and if you have few friends that you get along with, well it's something. I haven't really found anyone that I get along with in my entire school. It's tough, isn't it?
Ehh. If you have AIM we can talk :D Just go to my advice column and there ya go.
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Alright. My brother use to tell me a similar thing about his friends, he always felt like the dad in the group because everyone else was immature. And he use to try and do the things they would do w/ them, but it was never fun for him, because his personality was totally different. But anyways, heres what he did. He started hanging out w/ people on his sports teams, not i dont know if you play sports but they have so many different ages and groups that if you like something similar a frienship can began there. But also your 18, which makes it hard to just pick something up, or anything like that. Plus if your a senior in highschool you might be the most mature one there. I would just try and find ppl a year older then you, and if they dont take you serious, move on to a different group of ppl older then you, someone eventually will. Two of my best friends are in the grade above me and i think it makes it almost a stronger relationship, you dont see them as much, but when you do boy do you got alot to talk about.
*thats just my opinion* to really try and make friends w/ the peopel older then you. And if that doesnt work think about just spending some time alone, sometimes just spending a weekend by yourself can be fun. Possibly find guys to hang out with, yeah they can be even more immature but you'll expect it and you wont be doing the same things that you do w/ the girls. Lastly, look for some family. If you have any cousins close in your age that live close i think they are always fun to hang out w/, they basically like you because they've known you for so long, and they might be feeling the same way.. if its in your blood. ha sorry if that wasnt to helpful. I tryed. MUCHO GRANDE LOVE. <3
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It's sounds as though maybe you're maturing internally faster than externally and you and your friends are confused. Your friends can't understand what happened to the person they used to hang out with, even though you may look the same, you're acting differently, so they're not sure how to respond to you anymore. You feel different but maybe don't look it so there are mixed signals all over the place. There is a chance they will catch up but it may be that you do need to find a different group. If you look like a '15 year old hooligan' but don't act like it, could you amend your appearence a bit, so that it is more in line with the way you are now? If you no longer look like a hooligan, you may find older people are more ready to accept you. If you really want to be part of a group again but you are comfortable with the way you are, why not look at some activities that include yours and higher ages? You would then have the chance to make friends with people who share an interest and maybe be a little older and more mature in their outlook. If you like people, why not volunteer to help a charity? This would give you an outlet for this and give you something worthwhile to do at the same time. It also gives you the opportunity to meet up with more possible friends. Good luck.
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