My best friends parents just told her that they are getting a divorce. I don't know what to say to her. I basically said "I am soooo sorry" and "this should be happening to you" I also toldh er tha ti am always there for her she can call me anytime, it doesn't matter if its 12 midnight, and she can come over whenever, she doesn't hav eto call or nothin' i don't know what else to say. HELP!!!!
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship? lyDia_LoU answered Tuesday October 18 2005, 6:42 pm: lol I'm assuming you ment "this shouldn't be happening to you", but nonetheless I think you are doing what you should be. There's no "right" way to handle it. Obviosly your friend isn't "ok" even if she says she is, and she will have her bad days when things at home aren't going so well. Maybe try having her over after school to do homework- to distract her, and keep telling her you're there for her. Don't bring up the divorce, let her bring it up if she wants to talk about it. If you want more ideas just ask!
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X0C0URT answered Sunday October 16 2005, 1:16 pm: I think you are doing a pretty good job. All you can do is let her know you are there for her. It's not like you can fix her parents' marriage so you have to comfort her and try to make her feel a little better about the situation. This is a really hard time for her so just letting her know that she has a good friend will probably help her out a lot.
GoAskMaggie answered Saturday October 15 2005, 11:54 pm: You can't really say anything else. It's honestly not up to you to give her answers, its just up to you to be supportive. Be a good friend and don't treat her any differently because of what she's going through. If she brings the topic up all you can really do is to be understanding to the best of your abilities.
Chicken_flavored_eggs answered Saturday October 15 2005, 11:11 pm: Most of the time when someone is dealing with a upsetting situation you don't know what to say or do. Sometimes when you really care for someone you feel as if you aren't doing enough. This is normal. Right now there isn't a whole lot you can do for her. Her life is about to change in a drastic way and there is no way she can control it. Everyone deals with upsetting situations differently. What you have done so far is about all you can do. She may need space to figure things out. She may not know what to think or feel. What I try to do is provide a distraction. I will say something stupid or silly and try to make their time with me as fun as possible. (the rest of the time they have to deal with what is going on) If she needs her space give it to her. When she needs you to be there be there. That is about all that you can do. She may not at first but she will come around and need support. I believe you will be there to give it to her. Just try to keep it positive. Everything else will be negative for a while. [ Chicken_flavored_eggs's advice column | Ask Chicken_flavored_eggs A Question ]
crazygoober2006 answered Saturday October 15 2005, 9:58 pm: Sometimes there is really nothing you can say except that you are always there to listen. That you'll be your friend's shoulder to cry on, and that you'll even be there in the silence. Divorce is rough. Just be a comfort as best as you know how to be. Good luck. I hope I helped. [ crazygoober2006's advice column | Ask crazygoober2006 A Question ]
karenR answered Saturday October 15 2005, 9:32 pm: Sounds like you did as any good friend would do. Offered to be there and listen. That's the best thing you can do.
I do have a couple of websites. They are mostly for the children of parents who are getting a divorce. I would bet though that there may be something in them that can help your friend get through it all. I will send them to you, maybe you can share what you learn with her. :)
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