|
my stupid friend
my friend is 13 and she had sex with a sixteen year old and she got pregnant because her cheap boyfriend couldn't spare the extra 3 dollars to buy the good condoms and it ripped, so now she's all excited about having a baby and i told its nothing to be excited about and i told her that when your that young and have a baby that its not very safe and you could die is it true?
and by the way i love my friend to death and i have know clue what to say to her about the whole thing and she's mad that everyone is calling her a slut which she is!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: General Sex Questions?
The absolute biggest, most important thing for your friend to do is go to a doctor. Multiple studies have shown receiving prenatal care can greatly reduce the chance of complications (such as miscarriage or birth defects). Her doctor should explain the importance of eating right and following healthy behavior.
As to her being excited, let her be. Pregnancy involves a huge hormonal and status shift (regardless of whether it was planned or if it's difficult) and woman can feel a wide range of emotions, even very surprising ones for the situation.
Why is "everyone" calling her a slut? Because she was foolish with one guy? Bluntly, you need to tell people to fuck off. Pregnancy is a major life change and it doesn't matter who's pregnant, there is no reason to bash her. That's rude and stupid.
Yes, she will need to talk to her parents, but no stunts about it. Unless there is a chance of abuse, her parents just may be the best support she has (especially seeing as nobody else has the balls to stand up for her).
And I'm curious, where is the father? He has a legal responsibility to her and the child. By having sex with her, he agreed to at least financially assist in the case of pregnancy.
edit-in: Have her go to www.birthright.org or www.plannedparenthood.org to get information on services if she needs some professional help finding services. If she doesn't have internet at home (or is uncomfortable there), usually libraries allow short usage of certain computers for the internet.
]
I think there is more of a risk with having a baby when you are younger, but you should be proud of you're friend by doing the right thing and keeping the baby instead of having an abortion. I'm sure she's very torn up inside and is actually upset about it and is acting. If you are her friend I think you should be there to support her and not call her a slut, give her a shoulder to cry on. She's not exactly a slut anyway, she is young and she thought she was in love and did a stupid thing, but a slut is when you sleep around with alot of guys.
I hope everything goes okay with your friend and also have you mentioned adoption for her. She may be a tad bit TOO young to KEEP the baby and it would be a very kind thing to do both for the baby, another couple, and herself to put it up for adoption. Just remember, be there for her, she may just be in shock for the moment but soon it will settle and when she FULLY understands what's happening I'm sure she'll be upset so just be there for her and everything.
]
Your friend may have made the mistake by having sex at a young age as well as getting pregnant, but as her friend you should continue to be by her side. It's tough being a teen parent and even though she is excited about having this child now. she's going to need a good solid friend who will be there to support her when she needs it most. Also, if she sleeps around with about 100 guys, no female or male deserves to be called a slut. We all make mistakes and no one has the right to judge anyone for whatever they may do. Keep your head up, and be a friend. Stick this pregnancy out with her. when you need someone most, you may be assured to have the same friendship that you have given to her. =)
]
Honey what was your friend thinking. That baby is gonna ruin her life she is 13 she is my age. That is very dangerous her having a baby this age, its dangerous for her and her baby. Her body isnt fully matuered yet she could have problems during labor. Be there for her sweety she really needs you. Take care
]
The only thing that I can tell you is that your friend made a bad choice, you know that already. And your friend will see how bad that choice was when her baby is born, I'm not saying that things will be horrible, but she will see everything that shes gave up for sex. So, try not to really tell her how bad things will be, because she'll see it, she gave up her childhood, and it will be way too hard not to notice that fact. Support and help your best friend, even though you feel upset with what shes done. Think of this as a learning experiance for you. At least you know that you'll never get together with a sixteen year old boy when you're only thirteen, and if you ever go and have sex too young, you can think of your best friends' life, and ask yourself if its all worth risking. I hope you understand that sixteen is too old for thirteen right now. Later on in life, 2 years will mean nothing, but as of right now when you're a minor, it means your life. I know that you might agree with everyone who is calling her a slut, but she can't erase this big mistake shes made, so calling her a slut won't change the fact that shes pregnant. All you can do is help her through some rough patches that are coming her way.
-TheTeenGirl
]
well that is pretty stupid. why would yu have sex at 13!!?? i mean it is a 50% chance that you will get pregnant and then you really have to think. tell her that she has her whole life to have kids but what is important right now is her school work and her own life. that doesnt involve taking care of a baby 24/7. maybe you should try to convince her about putting the baby in an addoption center. just think about what is best for the baby. i know she must want it to have a good home and to be takin care of.
<33* hope ii helped
please feel free to tell me wat happens... i always have an open ear... make sure you also come to me with any other problems
]
You need to be supportive. She may be acting excited to cover up her nervousness.
She needs to tell her parents (if she hasn't yet) and she needs to get good prenatal care. Unfortunately 13 year olds have babies a lot. Most come through it fine. No need to scare the girl.
I'd be mad if people called me a slut too. If she hasn't been sleeping around with everyone who asks she isn't a slut. Look it up and set them all straight. She will have enough to worry about without having people call her names.
]
She doesn't even sound like she is ready to have a baby. That kid is going to have one immature mother. Let her know that her boyfriend probably wont even support the baby since he's only 16. And let her know that she needs to think about renewing her life, starting over on a clean slate. Refreshing her reputation by thinking over her mistakes, accepting what she did, realizing it was wrong and absolutly NOTHING to be proud of, and she should respect herself and her body. She should make some resolutions for herself and stay true to them. She needs to know her priorities and ask herself what she values most in life. Like, she should live with the consequence of her mistake and have this baby, but she'll have to deal with the aftermath. The baby's father supporting, her family im sure are not happy with her. She needs to for example become a better person by choosing not to make the same mistake again and choose to abstain from sex at this age. She'll have to change, and she'll have to change for herself. Once she is a different person, other people will get to know her and see her in a new light.
]
Yes,you are right!It is very unsafe because sometimes baby need room so the can get out so if she is like very short and sknny she will have tons of trouble for the baby to come out.Make sure she knows what she is doing and going through because she might not know anything bout the baby!And yas,itis nothing to be proud of.She should be called a slut (no affence) because at that age of 13 which is my age,she should only be at the age of kissing and thats it!How in the world did she get the idea of having sex at 13?
Well i hope your friend can get through the operation O.K!
Lots of love,
♥Kristine!
I hope your not offended by anything i said but they are actually true!
]
♥ 0MG.
Yeah that is NUTHiNG to be proud of. This will change her life forever. Yeah you could die if you have a baby at too young. Shes still devoloping & her body may not be ready to have a baby. This may not be the case though. Make sure she tells her parents. Tell her the consequences but dont be totally negative. You oly can really experience the joy of having a baby when you older & experienced. Hope I helped. & Good luck! LOVE YA. MUCH LUHV
]
More Questions: |