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The Life of a Homosexual Freshman
I am 15 year old male, gay, and attending High School. In the past year, I've come to terms with who I am and I've come out to 2 of my friends. My huge problem is that nobody my age comes out of the closet so I am going to be single for a while. I am despretely lonely and wanting someone to sweep me off my feet. I just feel so deprest and want to have a boyfriend like all the other straight couples have where you love each other and understand each other and comfort one another. My problem is that there is this guy that I like but he has no clue I exist. I think that he is gay. The signs are that he is in tennis, went to tennis camp and is trying out for the tennis team, is in drama class, his eyebrows look plucked, he looks well made up and his hair is curly and conditioned, he is fit, and all his friends are strangely attractive. I also see the way he looks at guys and can kinda tell. I really want to become friends with him so that I can be around him and be happy and possibly get him to come out to me and maybe even become my boyfriend but I don't know how to go up to him and become his friend. It's like I can't just walk up to him and say hey what's up because we don't know each other so I was thinking of bringing up tennis because I've started taking lessons and stuff and I'm going to try out for the team just so I can be there with him and possibly go to his camp and get closer to him. I just don't know how to become his friend or how to talk to him. What should I do?
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Well do like you said, just keep going with the tennis thing. And then next time you see him at tennis camp or w/e, then just ask him if he wants to play a game with you. And then whenever you finish, just start talking to him. Maybe ask him,
-how long has he been playing tennis?
-how did he first begin to like it? Like did he play it as a child, etc?
-maybe ask him for some help with some stuff ( so then you guys can hang out more ;-)..)
-and then slowly just start adding some other stuff in like about himself, family, music, etc. and just start talking and be yourself =D If you're sure that he's gay, he probably is ( cause you said you can tell how he looks at guys ) and so yeah just keep getting closer to him, and then maybe someday he'll tell you. It actually might even be easier if after you guys become friends, you tell him first cause then he might feel more at ease to tell you he is too. I hope I helped!
Love,
MELii
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hey man. i'm on the tennis team and i'm in a drama class and i'm fit and my eyebrows are plucked but that doesn't make me gay! b/c i'm not!
But anyway. if his body language tells you hes gay then go for it
good luck and keep me posted.
ps-i've got nothing against gay people. in fact, i've got friends who are gay.
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Sounds like you have a good plan to get to know this guy better babe. Just take it slow and be yourself. Alot of guys your age aren't as comfortable with themselves as you are. Don't push, just accept people for who they are and were they are in life.
If this guy isn't gay, or simply isn't interested, don't take it too hard. I'm a theatre geek myself and I'll tell ya all the guys who look queer aren't and all the guys who look straight aren't.
Anyways, maybe you can reach out to other gay teens around you through community groups or centers. I know I was shocked when I found out that my tiny little sub-urban town had a Gay Teen Art club with over twenty members from thirteen all the way to 20.
Good Luck!
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A gayy!!!!!!! Everybody RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN
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yes tennis is an excellent way to get to know him,..approach him and say something like"iknow yuo play tennis.i was wondering if you would want to play with me some time and givee me some pointers"
after playing exchange phone numbers and hang out..eventually after hanging out becoming close...bring up the subject of gays..if he seems very trustworthy,,come out to him..and if your right and hes gay,, he will come out to you as well
good luck!
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Hey i think if you really want to make the time why dont you ask him to help you out with playing or ask him if he'd like to play with you.. you can talk to him a lil bit about the sport and stuff.. i mean when you go like try out or whatever bring this up and be like hey your pretty good want to practice with me one day..
i mean if people find out about this in your school you also could have problems you know that right...? i mean teenagers will do pretty much anything to ruin somebodys highschool rep.. so i would suggest maybe having a reltionship out of school and keeping it between you and this other guy.. im not sayin dont go for this guy you like but just keep it between you guys..
Hope i helped ♥ Dez
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Why would you think a guy is gay because he plays tennis?? I have lots of straight guy friends who play tennis. And look at Andy Roddick, Roger Federer, Andre Agassi. Are any of them gay? No. I don't know how you can associate tennis with being gay.
X0C0URT
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Erm. Because he plays tennis that makes him gay? Honey, you should know better than to stereotype people like that! Think about yourself! Do you speak with a lisp and have a natural skill for interior decorating and dressing well? Do girls love to go shopping with you? I know plenty of gays, bi's and transgendered people. I myself am bi. And none of us fit those stereotypes. Become his friend like you would with any other person. And if he's gay and you end up going out, that's awesome. But be prepared, because he might not even be, let alone romantically interested in you. People are multi-dimensional. Love of tennis and plucked eyebrows do not a homosexual make. There are probably a lot of gay people at your school. Most in my school are. Others are, but just don't know yet. In fact, lots of people will show "homosexual tendencies". That's because, like I said, people are multi-dimensional. But I really should stop talking about that, I don't want to bore you with an essay about human sexuality. Actually I do, because it would be fun for me, but I'm not going to. Is there a Gay Straight Alliance at your school? It's not a dating service, but you can meet people there. And just talk to people everyone you meet. By the way, if you're not into the goth scene...my suggestion is to get into it. It's not always like this, but generally speaking goths tend to be more accepting of different sexualities. But you don't have to if you don't want to. It's not for everybody. But anyways, really...just talk to everyone! Make friends with people! You never know what a friendship could lead to. Even talk to hot, heterosexual girls. They might have a gay brother. Also, like goths, girls are generally accepting of gay boys. Oh yeah, and don't do the tennis thing just for him! Do tennis because you like tennis. But if you don't like tennis, don't change yourself for someone else.
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maybe your mates arnt gay just give them time they will come out of there shell soon
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I don't want to be the one to discourage homosexuality, but I think perhaps the best way to go about things is to keep it out of school. Sure it's alright to meet the guy at school, but I would really recommend keeping displays of affection MILES away from school. There are some real homophobes around at your age, and being openly gay will probably make your school life a living hell.
That said, I think you would be perfectly fine just walking up to him and saying hey, even if he doesn't know you. I say so, because if he were gay he'd probably give you a chance... but you don't seem to want to do that, so I'll try to think of something else. But seriously, you could go up and compliment his tennis and take it from there. (Ok, I can't think of anything else) Really, the only way you're going to meet him is if you get talking to him somehow, so just leave all of your opportunities open. Maybe if you make sure you smell nice, and pull his trick he'll figure out you're gay, and approach you.
Lastly, be prepared if he isn't gay. Some guys are pretty feminine, yet still retain their sexual orientation - I've been called gay by a lot of people, but I've never been, and as far as I can tell, never will be homosexual. I just try to be nice for the girls. Maybe he's doing the same, so you should always be ready to leave him behind if he's straight. Nothing is worse than trying to be converted when you know you're straight (well, I wouldn't know, but I can imagine X_X)
Hope I've given you some ideas, or the confidence to talk to him, but once again, I'd try to keep it out of school. 15, 16, even some adults are morons, and you don't want them to screw up your life.
-K
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If you talk to someone else that knows him you could get his AIM s/n or his phone number and call him or talk to him online sometime. That way you might not feel as awkward as you would talking to him in person. Only try out for the tennis team if you actually like it. You don't want to be part of a team for something that you totally hate doing just for one person. Don't be afraid to introduce yourself to him if you can't or don't want to get his phone number or s/n!! Gay guys are usually pretty nice people, so that should give you another hint as to whether or not he is actually gay! But not all straight guys are jerks, so be careful with your judgement! Good Luck!
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he may be gay, but that could just be a stearotype. a lot of guys that seem gay really arn't. this situwation needs to be handeled delicalty, if you do this the wrong way you could be the laughing stock of the hole school. if i were you at first i would become his friend then ask him if he is gay and say your friend wanted to know.
hope i helped
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