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mom
me and my mom dont have a very good relationship! i am 13! i want to tell her so many things but i am usually too embarrassed to tell her! there isnt really anybody else to talk to about stuff! i want to be able to tell her what happens at school and who i am going out with! i would also like to get her to let me go to the movies on friday nights! dont say jsut talk to her about it bc i cant! its not that easy! thanx!
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Maybe if you start with something small you can do it. Tell her something that happened at school and see how it goes. If you'd like to send a note to my inbox maybe I could be of more help. Tell me why you don't think you have a good relationship and maybe I can come up with something better. Or you could post a more detailed one here. Sorry :(
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I understand completely what you mean. My mother and I have never had the BEST relationship either. Thankfully, I have a big sister I can talk to. But there are just some times when you need a mother's opinion or just some things you need to talk with her about. I know I am always too embarrassed to talk to my parents about that stuff. BUT she IS your mother, and there are going to come times when you're gonna have to talk to her about this stuff. The whole boyfriend and friend thing, she'll understand. She was once a kid too. Same goes for the movie thing. So just get up the courage and TALK TO HER! She's your mom! It'll be fine...it's not like she gonna thing you're dumb or abnormal. You're a teenager, that's what she expects! Hope I helped!
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Spending more time with your mom is a good step toward building a better relationship. Going shopping, watching movies, going out for coffee or lunch, walking, gardening, crafts,... all are ideas of activities you could do with your mom. Try inviting her to do something with you. It might seem a little awkward, but I think your mom will be thrilled that you want to spend time with her. Having fun leads to light-hearted, open conversation. Conversation may lead to opportunities to ask/tell your mom about the topics you want to talk about.
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Well you did get some good advice here, so let me add this. To kind of "break the ice" why not say. YOu know my friend (friend's name here)? she has such a great relationship with her mom. They talk about everything!" And stop there. See what your mom says. I suspect that she will say, "oH really, well is there something that you would like to talk to me about?"
And there you go. But listen, the timing is very important. Don't ask her when she is in the middle of something and doesn't have the time to talk. And you make sure you are ready with something to talk about, no matter how insignificant. You can start with a 5 or 10 minute conversation. Just to get started. Don't expect to spend hours and hours talking the firts time. But that will come in time. It is a good thing that you are attempting to accomplish. I think you will do OK. Your mom is a very important person in your life. She may feel uncomfortable too, about how to start a conversation. Good luck to you.
Michele
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There are other ways of communicating other than just talking. If you are uncomfortable talking to your mom. Try writing her a note. Tell her that you would like to start a new relationship with her. You want to start from scratch. Tell her that you want to be able to communicate with her without being embarrassed or feeling uncomfortable. You are going to need to talk to her eventually and this will probably be easier than talking to her face to face if you are uncomfortable. It will help you break the ice. I'm sure that she went through a lot of the things that you are going through and will want to hear what you have to say and wont to give you advice on things. She's probably just as uncomfortable as you are and just doesn't know how to start a convo with you. You should really try writing a letter tell her something small at first. Maybe tell her about something that happened in school. Once she sees that you want to talk to her she will open up more too.
Good luck and I hope everything works out
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I know it's not easy to talk to your mom. It took me until I was 13 until I started letting her in on my life. Just go up to her and say you want to do something. Just start out slow. You don't have to talk to her right away. Just invite her to a movie. You don't have to talk. Then sooner or later you'll get better at talking to her. It might take a while, but it's worth it if she's the only one you can talk to.
Hope this helped! :)
-Sam Louise
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Thats how it is for me...i usta just lie about tings and say i wasn't goin out with n e one but then she finds out and grounds me....so it might be easy 2 just have the 2 of you go out to dinner one night and sit and talk about those kinds of things...GOOD LUCK
~StEfF
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I used to have the same problem with my mom when I was your age. Even if it seems hard, try opening up to your mom, chances are she's been in the same situation you were in and can help you out. I wish that when I was younger I had talked to my mom more, it would have saved me a lot of stress and pain.
Just work on it until you feel comfortable with your mom, she loves you and won't judge you like kids at school.
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