im dating this guy its gonna be 2 years soon...but hes really jelous like he always think im flriting with every guy i talk to..and i had this best friend we'll call him tyler..well since me and my boyfriend are fighting alot about the flirting thing im hanging arould tyler more and i think im starting to like him more than a friend but i still love my boyfriend and im extremly confused..i need some help fast!
IveGotPinkJazzShoes answered Wednesday April 6 2005, 6:27 pm: your just feeling ht way because you are having a rocky patch in your relationship. you need to sit down and have a good talk with you boyfriend. you need to tell him how you feel (well all except the tyler thing) say that you dont flirt with other people and they mean nothing to you cos its him that you like. 2 years has to count for something so you have to like him! im sure he is just like this because he cares about you so much and is insecure about himself. he's just scared of loosing you. so dont throw your relationship away because you can work it out!
hope i helped! [ IveGotPinkJazzShoes's advice column | Ask IveGotPinkJazzShoes A Question ]
HyperactiveMiss answered Wednesday April 6 2005, 5:10 am: I see it both ways...be open minded here.
If he's jealous all the time, that might mean he doesn't have enough trust in you. If you're confused, it might mean you don't love him romantically as much as you thought. Maybe you should give Tyler a chance. Dating IS about exploring and finding the right person..not confining yourself to one person.
But then again...look at the other side to it. I can understand why he is jealous. Wouldn't you feel jealous if he talked to lots of girls? You can't blame them for being jealous, because it shows they really care about you and are constantly worrying about losing you.
I can't choose for you because that is your decision, but let me tell you that if you break up with him, please give it some time to sink in before you go for his bestfriend. Or don't even go out with him at all. Because that's really hurtful...to dump someone and date the bestfriend. It might, and probably will, cause some emotional problems. Think about why you dated him in the first place. If you decide to stay with your boyfriend, be sure to talk to him about his jealousy and see if he can be more laid back.
karenR answered Wednesday April 6 2005, 3:17 am: I'm gonna say date Tyler.
Someone who is going to be jealous everytime you so much as look at someone else is probably not going to change very easily. You can try talking to him but some guys are just that way. It's already causing fights and i'm afraid it will just get worse.Very hard to deal with that type day after day. [ karenR's advice column | Ask karenR A Question ]
LoveJoy answered Wednesday April 6 2005, 2:31 am: Stay away from jealous boyfriends!
I'm serious. What you are describing is exactly what will happen every single time. He gets jealous, that creates an argument, you guys become distant, you spend time with someone else, you start to like the new person - and voila! Your jealous boyfriend has created the very thing he was freaking out about when at first there was nothing to worry about.
This will never change, never get better. Jealousy comes from feeling extremely insecure, and you can't do anything to make him feel secure if he doesn't already.
I know you are in love with your boyfriend, and that makes it really hard to even consider leaving him for good, but that is my advice to you. You don't need all the drama of dealing with your boyfriend's insecurities - I'm sure you have enough of your own (we all do). You deserve to be with someone who will treat you well and always make you feel like you are a good person, rather than like a person who is cheating when she really isn't.
JadedinNowhere answered Wednesday April 6 2005, 2:22 am: Ok, stop hanging around Tyler.. you are only making things worse. If you want to make things right just apologize like crazy to your boyfriend, and stop flirting as much as you have been with Tyler. I mean, you claim to LOVE your boyfriend, but how can you really love him if you are flirting with some other dude? [ JadedinNowhere's advice column | Ask JadedinNowhere A Question ]
soonerfreak128 answered Wednesday April 6 2005, 12:59 am: Well, I think you should just break up with your boyfriend. Because it seems that even if you go to TALK to a guy thats your friend, your bf will think you are flirting. So, I would go ahead and see if you can get together with Tyler. Just tell your bf that you dont think things are going to work out if he is going to be jealous all the time, when you really arent flirting. Hope I helped!
BunnyInWonderland answered Wednesday April 6 2005, 12:21 am: My thought is that you're liking Tyler only subconciously, to "get back" at your boyfriend. You may not even realize you're doing it.
It's time to have a chat with your boyfriend. Tell him that what he says offends you, and you don't like it when he says things like that, because it's not true. BUT ONLY if it really ISN'T true. If you ARE flirting with Tyler because you DO like him, then tell you're boyfriend that you've had your eye on someone else, and call it quits.
But if you don't like Tyler, and you're boyfriend actually is reading it all wrong, then tell him that. He's only doing it because he likes you a lot, and doesn't want to lose you.
mtrx0007 answered Tuesday April 5 2005, 11:48 pm: To tell the truth, you are the only one who knows what you want to do. If you think that things with your current boyfriend are not working out too well, you could go with Tyler. You dont have to stick with someone because you have been going out for a long time. Mabye you just feel constricted by your bf's jealousy thing. Either way, it's up to you. Best of luck. [ mtrx0007's advice column | Ask mtrx0007 A Question ]
Karen answered Tuesday April 5 2005, 10:02 pm: Being in a relationship for almost 2 years is a long time and this fighting between you and your boyfriend is breaking your relationship up with him. If you truely love your boyfriend, you would try to stop liking Tyler and try to fix your relationship with your boyfriend. Most guys always accuse their girlfriends of flirting with guys because they just want them to their own in a way. If you know that Tyler likses you and would go out with you if you ever dumped your boyfriend, then dump your him and go out with him but if you do that, it could be a big mistake. All couples fight during their relationship so you need to think about that. Why don't you try working this fighting with your boyfriend and if nothing seems to be working, then just take a break, meaning you can be free and date anyone, but don't technically dump him and just date Tyler. Just think about what you want to do because none of us can tell you the exact real answer. [ Karen's advice column | Ask Karen A Question ]
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